Am I 9 months old or 19 years old?


New member
Lately, every morning I'll wake up and have to wash my sheets and my pants from peeing in the middle of the night. I never have anything close to this problem during the day, I think it's the coughing at night. I've tried panty liners and they don't work, and I don't want to go through the embarrasment of wear diapers. Especially if I have a guy spend the night.


You need to bring this up to your doctor. Also maybe consider sleeping propped up to help reduce the intensity of your coughing fits when they start to come on


New member
I started having pretty bad incontinence in my twenties, due to coughing. Pelvic floor muscle exercises did not help me because the coughing was so intense. (I broke 2-4 ribs many times on both sides from coughing so hard) You might want to try Poise pads, the moderate or heavy type. Panti liners just wont cut it. Can also ask your doc about any medicine changes that might have led to this being worse. And yeah, its embarrassing and Poise or Depends are just annoying. But you do what ya gotta. When I got my lung transplant at 46, post-surgery the problem was eliminated. The suggestion to raise the head of your bed or sleep on a wedge pad was very helpful to me as well.


Super Moderator
I am sorry to hear about what would be embarrassing for anyone. My niece started to have a little leaking when she was 11. Ultimately she found Kegel exercises for strengthening the pelvic floor muscles. Being 11, 19 or 79, the problem doesn't have an age limit. As a late bloomer, the possibility exists that you have some anxiety over intimacy and you might want to meet with a counselor a few times just to make sure. If nothing else, you will have less anxiety over the issue. Don't be too hard on yourself, Kegel exercises usually work unless you have something else going on physically. A visit to a urologist or an OBGYN is in order either way. With my niece, nothing physical was determined and she did eliminate the problem with exercise, growing up physically and she did have some counseling. This is a more common problem than one might expect. Women tend to know a lot about their fellow women. I became aware of how common it is through a girlfriend in college and again reminded when my niece started having problems. As a man, I am not at all bothered by a little leaking, and I expect most men would be fine with it as well. It beats the heck out of not being able to go, something more common in men.

Anatomically the simplicity of the urinary tract of women compared to men is both a salvation and a potential problem. A bladder valve or sphincter and a short urethra and that's it. Men require a flexible cystoscope or have to be prepared to endure some serious discomfort while the anatomy is forced to fit a straight line. Damage from a UTI, something that starts out more common than in men, can make it difficult to close easily and always water tight. That short urethra makes infection and hygiene easier. You are definitely 19 years old to discuss medical issues so candidly.

One last consideration, the nerves. Most sphincters in our bodies are actually two band like muscles that makes sure of closure. One sphincter is part of the sympathetic nerves, the other is a parasympathetic nerve. When you can't go, it's because you have to want to relax the sphincter you do control, but it's not the right environment, mentally. When you have a weakening of the nerve signals, leaking is probably going to happen. You might have damaged nerves or your body's finishing up some transformation to the final adult anatomy and the nerves haven't caught up. If you have any back problems, sciatica or numbness in the region, a nerve could be pinched.

Good luck,