rebellious teen

LouLou

New member
7th grade - age 13 sucked. Maybe talk about upcoming times and let her know it's okay if she doesn't like this age. I wish someone had told me that things would change. I wasn't happy (for no particular reason) and I could only figure that was the way it was going to be. I wasn't depressed but I remember just not being excited about a whole lot. Hormonally so much is going on as others have mentioned. Has she started her period yet?
 

LouLou

New member
7th grade - age 13 sucked. Maybe talk about upcoming times and let her know it's okay if she doesn't like this age. I wish someone had told me that things would change. I wasn't happy (for no particular reason) and I could only figure that was the way it was going to be. I wasn't depressed but I remember just not being excited about a whole lot. Hormonally so much is going on as others have mentioned. Has she started her period yet?
 

LouLou

New member
7th grade - age 13 sucked. Maybe talk about upcoming times and let her know it's okay if she doesn't like this age. I wish someone had told me that things would change. I wasn't happy (for no particular reason) and I could only figure that was the way it was going to be. I wasn't depressed but I remember just not being excited about a whole lot. Hormonally so much is going on as others have mentioned. Has she started her period yet?
 

LouLou

New member
7th grade - age 13 sucked. Maybe talk about upcoming times and let her know it's okay if she doesn't like this age. I wish someone had told me that things would change. I wasn't happy (for no particular reason) and I could only figure that was the way it was going to be. I wasn't depressed but I remember just not being excited about a whole lot. Hormonally so much is going on as others have mentioned. Has she started her period yet?
 

LouLou

New member
7th grade - age 13 sucked. Maybe talk about upcoming times and let her know it's okay if she doesn't like this age. I wish someone had told me that things would change. I wasn't happy (for no particular reason) and I could only figure that was the way it was going to be. I wasn't depressed but I remember just not being excited about a whole lot. Hormonally so much is going on as others have mentioned. Has she started her period yet?
 

BMan

New member
My son is now 15yrs old an when he was 13yrs old he went on the Tranplant List for a double lung tranplant. So...he too had to face alot of things and struggled with his treatments and night feeds, bipap, oxygen etc.. I so wanted him to want to be healthy...to do anything he could to understand it's importance. I would let him fall asleep then slip bipap on and set up the night feed. He obviously knew I was doing it...but he preferred it that way I guess. It seemed that as time passed he slowly took over little by little. It was like he had to realize on his own that it needed to be done..with it..he felt better, slept better and was stronger. Without it he was sluggish, tired and hungery. I think the turning point was letting him sleep over at people's places...yup, night feed and all was schlemped there...I wasn't there to help out so it was up to him to educate his friend, the parents. It meant that they understood him more, they learned more, he learned more...letting people into his world. Some were more than willing, some not..but he was willing to share and play an active role in his own health care. Did it happen quickly no...he asked alot of questions and as time passed the will to be just another kid was greater than the feeling of making yourself different.
I think she just has to get used to all the new feelings, new friends, who would understand...I find that my son and I are very open and talk freely about CF, transplant, it helps because those around us feel like we do, it's just part of who we are!
 

BMan

New member
My son is now 15yrs old an when he was 13yrs old he went on the Tranplant List for a double lung tranplant. So...he too had to face alot of things and struggled with his treatments and night feeds, bipap, oxygen etc.. I so wanted him to want to be healthy...to do anything he could to understand it's importance. I would let him fall asleep then slip bipap on and set up the night feed. He obviously knew I was doing it...but he preferred it that way I guess. It seemed that as time passed he slowly took over little by little. It was like he had to realize on his own that it needed to be done..with it..he felt better, slept better and was stronger. Without it he was sluggish, tired and hungery. I think the turning point was letting him sleep over at people's places...yup, night feed and all was schlemped there...I wasn't there to help out so it was up to him to educate his friend, the parents. It meant that they understood him more, they learned more, he learned more...letting people into his world. Some were more than willing, some not..but he was willing to share and play an active role in his own health care. Did it happen quickly no...he asked alot of questions and as time passed the will to be just another kid was greater than the feeling of making yourself different.
I think she just has to get used to all the new feelings, new friends, who would understand...I find that my son and I are very open and talk freely about CF, transplant, it helps because those around us feel like we do, it's just part of who we are!
 

BMan

New member
My son is now 15yrs old an when he was 13yrs old he went on the Tranplant List for a double lung tranplant. So...he too had to face alot of things and struggled with his treatments and night feeds, bipap, oxygen etc.. I so wanted him to want to be healthy...to do anything he could to understand it's importance. I would let him fall asleep then slip bipap on and set up the night feed. He obviously knew I was doing it...but he preferred it that way I guess. It seemed that as time passed he slowly took over little by little. It was like he had to realize on his own that it needed to be done..with it..he felt better, slept better and was stronger. Without it he was sluggish, tired and hungery. I think the turning point was letting him sleep over at people's places...yup, night feed and all was schlemped there...I wasn't there to help out so it was up to him to educate his friend, the parents. It meant that they understood him more, they learned more, he learned more...letting people into his world. Some were more than willing, some not..but he was willing to share and play an active role in his own health care. Did it happen quickly no...he asked alot of questions and as time passed the will to be just another kid was greater than the feeling of making yourself different.
I think she just has to get used to all the new feelings, new friends, who would understand...I find that my son and I are very open and talk freely about CF, transplant, it helps because those around us feel like we do, it's just part of who we are!
 

BMan

New member
My son is now 15yrs old an when he was 13yrs old he went on the Tranplant List for a double lung tranplant. So...he too had to face alot of things and struggled with his treatments and night feeds, bipap, oxygen etc.. I so wanted him to want to be healthy...to do anything he could to understand it's importance. I would let him fall asleep then slip bipap on and set up the night feed. He obviously knew I was doing it...but he preferred it that way I guess. It seemed that as time passed he slowly took over little by little. It was like he had to realize on his own that it needed to be done..with it..he felt better, slept better and was stronger. Without it he was sluggish, tired and hungery. I think the turning point was letting him sleep over at people's places...yup, night feed and all was schlemped there...I wasn't there to help out so it was up to him to educate his friend, the parents. It meant that they understood him more, they learned more, he learned more...letting people into his world. Some were more than willing, some not..but he was willing to share and play an active role in his own health care. Did it happen quickly no...he asked alot of questions and as time passed the will to be just another kid was greater than the feeling of making yourself different.
I think she just has to get used to all the new feelings, new friends, who would understand...I find that my son and I are very open and talk freely about CF, transplant, it helps because those around us feel like we do, it's just part of who we are!
 

BMan

New member
My son is now 15yrs old an when he was 13yrs old he went on the Tranplant List for a double lung tranplant. So...he too had to face alot of things and struggled with his treatments and night feeds, bipap, oxygen etc.. I so wanted him to want to be healthy...to do anything he could to understand it's importance. I would let him fall asleep then slip bipap on and set up the night feed. He obviously knew I was doing it...but he preferred it that way I guess. It seemed that as time passed he slowly took over little by little. It was like he had to realize on his own that it needed to be done..with it..he felt better, slept better and was stronger. Without it he was sluggish, tired and hungery. I think the turning point was letting him sleep over at people's places...yup, night feed and all was schlemped there...I wasn't there to help out so it was up to him to educate his friend, the parents. It meant that they understood him more, they learned more, he learned more...letting people into his world. Some were more than willing, some not..but he was willing to share and play an active role in his own health care. Did it happen quickly no...he asked alot of questions and as time passed the will to be just another kid was greater than the feeling of making yourself different.
I think she just has to get used to all the new feelings, new friends, who would understand...I find that my son and I are very open and talk freely about CF, transplant, it helps because those around us feel like we do, it's just part of who we are!
 

pjspiegle

New member
I agree with most of the posts. We are currently sitting at Denver Childrens Hospital doing a tune-up. My son is 14 years old, and he too will do his treatments when he is reminded. I use to let him do them in his room, thinking that is what he wanted and was easier for him, but he actually does a better treatment in the living room interacting with the rest of the family. Raising regular teens is tricky and hard to figure out how much to contol for them, how much to let go, how much responsiblities to give them, but it is even harder when they have CF. I have heard from many CF patients over the last 14 years that they wished their moms were as involved with their care as I was with Nathans and that they would have probably done more of the things they needed to do if their parents had been more involved. With that said, yes we want them to gain independence, but they need to know without any doubts whatsoever that we are here for them and that they do not have to do it alone, now while they are teens, or later when they are adults! Never, not even one single time, have I ever heard a teen with CF say they wish their parents would leave them alone to deal with the disease. It is possible she is depressed, but maybe not for a reason you are thinking, maybe she wants your help but doesn't know how to tell you and is afraid that you will be disappointed with her. My experience with my teens is that the harder they are pushing us away, the more they need and want us.

Yes, at least she is doing the treatments when you remind her. Consider that she may be trying to tell you that she still needs you to be involved with her care.

Good luck,
 

pjspiegle

New member
I agree with most of the posts. We are currently sitting at Denver Childrens Hospital doing a tune-up. My son is 14 years old, and he too will do his treatments when he is reminded. I use to let him do them in his room, thinking that is what he wanted and was easier for him, but he actually does a better treatment in the living room interacting with the rest of the family. Raising regular teens is tricky and hard to figure out how much to contol for them, how much to let go, how much responsiblities to give them, but it is even harder when they have CF. I have heard from many CF patients over the last 14 years that they wished their moms were as involved with their care as I was with Nathans and that they would have probably done more of the things they needed to do if their parents had been more involved. With that said, yes we want them to gain independence, but they need to know without any doubts whatsoever that we are here for them and that they do not have to do it alone, now while they are teens, or later when they are adults! Never, not even one single time, have I ever heard a teen with CF say they wish their parents would leave them alone to deal with the disease. It is possible she is depressed, but maybe not for a reason you are thinking, maybe she wants your help but doesn't know how to tell you and is afraid that you will be disappointed with her. My experience with my teens is that the harder they are pushing us away, the more they need and want us.

Yes, at least she is doing the treatments when you remind her. Consider that she may be trying to tell you that she still needs you to be involved with her care.

Good luck,
 

pjspiegle

New member
I agree with most of the posts. We are currently sitting at Denver Childrens Hospital doing a tune-up. My son is 14 years old, and he too will do his treatments when he is reminded. I use to let him do them in his room, thinking that is what he wanted and was easier for him, but he actually does a better treatment in the living room interacting with the rest of the family. Raising regular teens is tricky and hard to figure out how much to contol for them, how much to let go, how much responsiblities to give them, but it is even harder when they have CF. I have heard from many CF patients over the last 14 years that they wished their moms were as involved with their care as I was with Nathans and that they would have probably done more of the things they needed to do if their parents had been more involved. With that said, yes we want them to gain independence, but they need to know without any doubts whatsoever that we are here for them and that they do not have to do it alone, now while they are teens, or later when they are adults! Never, not even one single time, have I ever heard a teen with CF say they wish their parents would leave them alone to deal with the disease. It is possible she is depressed, but maybe not for a reason you are thinking, maybe she wants your help but doesn't know how to tell you and is afraid that you will be disappointed with her. My experience with my teens is that the harder they are pushing us away, the more they need and want us.

Yes, at least she is doing the treatments when you remind her. Consider that she may be trying to tell you that she still needs you to be involved with her care.

Good luck,
 

pjspiegle

New member
I agree with most of the posts. We are currently sitting at Denver Childrens Hospital doing a tune-up. My son is 14 years old, and he too will do his treatments when he is reminded. I use to let him do them in his room, thinking that is what he wanted and was easier for him, but he actually does a better treatment in the living room interacting with the rest of the family. Raising regular teens is tricky and hard to figure out how much to contol for them, how much to let go, how much responsiblities to give them, but it is even harder when they have CF. I have heard from many CF patients over the last 14 years that they wished their moms were as involved with their care as I was with Nathans and that they would have probably done more of the things they needed to do if their parents had been more involved. With that said, yes we want them to gain independence, but they need to know without any doubts whatsoever that we are here for them and that they do not have to do it alone, now while they are teens, or later when they are adults! Never, not even one single time, have I ever heard a teen with CF say they wish their parents would leave them alone to deal with the disease. It is possible she is depressed, but maybe not for a reason you are thinking, maybe she wants your help but doesn't know how to tell you and is afraid that you will be disappointed with her. My experience with my teens is that the harder they are pushing us away, the more they need and want us.

Yes, at least she is doing the treatments when you remind her. Consider that she may be trying to tell you that she still needs you to be involved with her care.

Good luck,
 

pjspiegle

New member
I agree with most of the posts. We are currently sitting at Denver Childrens Hospital doing a tune-up. My son is 14 years old, and he too will do his treatments when he is reminded. I use to let him do them in his room, thinking that is what he wanted and was easier for him, but he actually does a better treatment in the living room interacting with the rest of the family. Raising regular teens is tricky and hard to figure out how much to contol for them, how much to let go, how much responsiblities to give them, but it is even harder when they have CF. I have heard from many CF patients over the last 14 years that they wished their moms were as involved with their care as I was with Nathans and that they would have probably done more of the things they needed to do if their parents had been more involved. With that said, yes we want them to gain independence, but they need to know without any doubts whatsoever that we are here for them and that they do not have to do it alone, now while they are teens, or later when they are adults! Never, not even one single time, have I ever heard a teen with CF say they wish their parents would leave them alone to deal with the disease. It is possible she is depressed, but maybe not for a reason you are thinking, maybe she wants your help but doesn't know how to tell you and is afraid that you will be disappointed with her. My experience with my teens is that the harder they are pushing us away, the more they need and want us.

Yes, at least she is doing the treatments when you remind her. Consider that she may be trying to tell you that she still needs you to be involved with her care.

Good luck,
 

hvmontigny

New member
I'm new at this so I hope I'm doing this right..not sure on how to navigate around this..anyway, I want to thank all of you for the advice..I think a big part of it is that she is growing up and pulling away from me, (she was always very clingy) so it just makes it hard for me to tell if its rebellion, depression or a little of both..right now she is not doing too good in school either, she just doesnt seem to care about her school work..hopefully we can get thru this but I may have her talk to a counselor..otherwise she is doing ok. well I could go on forever..thanks again to all. Heidi mom of Ian (18), Alex (15) w/o cf and Libby (13) w/cf. diagnosed at age 3.
 

hvmontigny

New member
I'm new at this so I hope I'm doing this right..not sure on how to navigate around this..anyway, I want to thank all of you for the advice..I think a big part of it is that she is growing up and pulling away from me, (she was always very clingy) so it just makes it hard for me to tell if its rebellion, depression or a little of both..right now she is not doing too good in school either, she just doesnt seem to care about her school work..hopefully we can get thru this but I may have her talk to a counselor..otherwise she is doing ok. well I could go on forever..thanks again to all. Heidi mom of Ian (18), Alex (15) w/o cf and Libby (13) w/cf. diagnosed at age 3.
 

hvmontigny

New member
I'm new at this so I hope I'm doing this right..not sure on how to navigate around this..anyway, I want to thank all of you for the advice..I think a big part of it is that she is growing up and pulling away from me, (she was always very clingy) so it just makes it hard for me to tell if its rebellion, depression or a little of both..right now she is not doing too good in school either, she just doesnt seem to care about her school work..hopefully we can get thru this but I may have her talk to a counselor..otherwise she is doing ok. well I could go on forever..thanks again to all. Heidi mom of Ian (18), Alex (15) w/o cf and Libby (13) w/cf. diagnosed at age 3.
 

hvmontigny

New member
I'm new at this so I hope I'm doing this right..not sure on how to navigate around this..anyway, I want to thank all of you for the advice..I think a big part of it is that she is growing up and pulling away from me, (she was always very clingy) so it just makes it hard for me to tell if its rebellion, depression or a little of both..right now she is not doing too good in school either, she just doesnt seem to care about her school work..hopefully we can get thru this but I may have her talk to a counselor..otherwise she is doing ok. well I could go on forever..thanks again to all. Heidi mom of Ian (18), Alex (15) w/o cf and Libby (13) w/cf. diagnosed at age 3.
 

hvmontigny

New member
I'm new at this so I hope I'm doing this right..not sure on how to navigate around this..anyway, I want to thank all of you for the advice..I think a big part of it is that she is growing up and pulling away from me, (she was always very clingy) so it just makes it hard for me to tell if its rebellion, depression or a little of both..right now she is not doing too good in school either, she just doesnt seem to care about her school work..hopefully we can get thru this but I may have her talk to a counselor..otherwise she is doing ok. well I could go on forever..thanks again to all. Heidi mom of Ian (18), Alex (15) w/o cf and Libby (13) w/cf. diagnosed at age 3.
 
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