Anxiety -

[coltsfan715]

Okay guys,

I have posted a handful of times on here about anxiety. I have had in the past (meaning years ago anxiety issues, but they haven't been as prevalent in recent years). Well I have been having difficulty as of late when I am trying to sleep. I will start to obsses about the smallest dumbest things and fear falling asleep because I am afraid I will die. I will wake up every few hours and find that my brain is racing like it is trying win a Nascar race or something. Everything is running through my head and no matter how stupid the thought my brian is somehow abl to conclude that whatever I am thinking will kill me if I sleep. Seriously - last night I dreamt I had a cat house in my car trunk (don't ask lol) and that I was keeping my old cat (passed away a few years ago) in it and that she was alive and well. Well I woke up and started to get anxiety because my brain was thinking OMG I can't get in the trunk - I won't be able to breath I will die ... being in the trunk of a car is kind of like sleeping with the covers near your face (i.e. interfering with breathing) if I go to sleep I will die. I know it is totally irrational but I can't stop the anxiety when it starts and my brain just keps going in circles. I get short of breath - which in turn makes getting comfortable enough to go to sleep near impossible. I end up only going to sleep once I get so exhausted I don't care and in fact I do not even remember falling asleep last night.

I am asking this because I am not real sure how to bring this up - or who to bring it up too. Do I tell my reg CF Doc this or do I make an appointment with a therapist/psychologist/psychiatrist? For those of you that have problems with anxiety who have you brought the problem up too? I can't handle this anymore. If I have another restless night due to panicking over a dream I had or due to thinking that if I lay on my left side I will not be able to breathe and I will die. Or whatever else runs through my head. Last night I had a serious problem with this. I was trying to get myself to laugh at how silly I was sounding but I could NOT calm down. I just feel helpless too because it always happens at night - when I am the only one awake, so I have no one to help me through it - nothing to keep my mind off of it.

Also to question. For those of you that have anxiety problems and are taking meds, do the meds actually prevent the thoughts that cause the anxiety or do they just keep you from having the panic response to those thoughts?

I took anxiety meds so sporadically when I was having problems years ago that I only remember them making me very tired. I was on the lowest dose of Xanax (which if I end up on meds I will be trying to stay away from that - it would sedate me so bad I couldn't do anything).

Thank you guys I really do appreciate any help and advice you can give. I am feeling kind of helpless about the situation right now, but that might just be my being tired. Who knows.

Thanks again,
Lindsey

 

[melleemac]

Lindsey
I haven t got cf but do suffer bad from anxiety. I suffer from bouts of depression, panic attacks and sleep deprivation and blackouts. Dr says its all due to stress. I was taking Effexor, Lorazapam and sleeping aids. The sleep aids made me bouce off the walls, had the totally opposite effect. The Lorazapam was for the panic attacks, and worked ok, I guess. The effexor on the other hand I wouldnt recommend. The meds dont get rid of the problems, but do help you cope better with dealing with everything. Well to begin with it did for me, but after a while the meds didnt work any more, so the Dr doubled the dosage, that worked for a bit and then he upped the dosage again, and so on.
In the end I felt like I was a walking zombie, just seem to go through the motions. I didnt like myself, or how I felt.
Mel

 

[LouLou]

Lindsey,

Are you exercising regularly? It might help to add in some yoga. I suggest this because if I am restless it's because I'm not exercising enough.

 

[thelizardqueen]

I brought it up with my CF doctor. I went to one of my regular clinic appointments and just told him, look I've been suffering from anxiety for x amount of years, and I'm tired of dealing with it on my own - what do I do? He refered me to the CF counselor, who in turn set me up a pysch evaluation, and I talk with the counselor every couple of weeks. Exercising does help too. I feel a ton better after a good workout on the treadmill. I also take Lorazapam (Adavan) - I take one every 12 hours, and since I've started doing that, I have way less anxiety. But the Adavan is only temporary until I get into Pysch for an official evaluation.

 

[coltsfan715]

Thanks for the responses so far. I do not exercise regularly - I have no schedule for it. I try to stay active and do things, but like I said nothing scheduled. I am working on getting a treadmill, hopefully I will have it within the week. I will definitely try using that REGULARLY when it gets here. I do hope that helps.

Thank you so much guys. Also thank you Liz I will bring it up to my CF doc when I go next time. I just didn't want to bring it up to him and have him look at me like - that isn't my area - you need to take that somewhere else lol. I know kind of silly.

Thanks again I REALLY appreciate it,
Lindsey

 

[Ender]

Hey Lindsey...

I was going through the same thing about 3 weeks ago...well, more like a year ago. It was last summer...and i lost my job...and it just kinda sent me in a spiral of depression and anxiety. I guess I always felt it a bit, but it just kinda brought it out more.

So it wasn't something that just came to be...as is your case i suppose. So i moved to Toronto, and at my first clinic i told them about anxiety, just that i feel anxious at times (wasn't very specific) and if i could get something for it. So the main doctor comes in and tells me that cfer's live a long life now and there is no reason to worry etc, and if i wanna talk to someone I can. I really didn't feel like talking so i declined.

Fast forward to Jul/Aug. I lost another job (because of depression, alcohol. I just didn't see the point of working monotonously with no goal in mind). I couldn't sleep at night...mind racing etc. When i did sleep, it was for 12-15 hours plus and I still felt tired....

Anyways, to your question. It was about 4:30 in the morning, and i couldn't take it anymore. I didn't want to talk to a therapist, but I couldn't let it affect me anymore. So i called my cf nurse, and she sent me a referall to a phychiastrist. I assume you can do the same thing. Although your cf doc could prescribe something, it wouldn't be tailored to your problems...

So, i talked to a therapist...about anxiety, sleeping...not wanting to get out of bed. Since i had tried zoloft in the past, and didn't like it, he prescribed me effexor. Despite the poster above me, it is working for me. However, to answer your question above...it does and it doesn't help with the thoughts. What i mean is is that you feel a bit more relaxed...your mood is elevated a bit, so you don't dwell on those thoughts. However, they are still there...and i can feel them suck me in sometimes still. It's only been two weeks though, and it can take a month for ssri's to work fully.

That is why i also agreed to do cognitive therapy. It teaches you to recognize your thoughts..and teaches you how to deal wth them more affectively, so they don't get you down. You won't always be on drugs per say, but you will always be thinking about things. Best to get those thoughts under control.

They won't give you xanax I don't think. They will probably give you an ssri...and maybe something to help you sleep. Don't worry though, if one doesn't work for you, they have others. Sometimes it takes two or three tries to get it to work.

So...i would say call your cf doc or nurse...and tell them you have been having anxiety issues for the last while...and you want to get help. They will send you to a referral (hopefully, if not ask) to a psych...and you can go from there. Be honest with your thoughts and feelings, and tell them what you want out of it. Also if they offer cognitive therapy...you should consider it. Nip it in the butt now, so you won't have to deal with it later. You'll feel a lot better

Good luck Lindsey. Let me know how it goes.
Thinking of you
Kiel

 

[coltsfan715]

Thanks a bunch for your post Kiel. I called my docs office today hoping to get an appointment for some other things as well. I am going to be talking to the nurse tomorrow and will try to handle it then or when I do actually get an appointment.

Thanks so much for the post.

Lindsey

 

[DietRootBeer]

Hi Lindsey!

Definately speak to your CF nurse about it ASAP...You do not have to suffer there are may ways of dealing with what you are experiencing. Some natural things you may want to try is: A vitamin B complexe- Go to any health food store ( some pharmacies too) and get a Vitamin B supplement. Mine is called STRESS B. Just tell them at the counter you want the Vitamin for stress they will know what you mean. Another thing to get while you are there is BACH rescue remedy ( google BACH flower remedies)...you put it under your tongue when you feel anxious. Also listening to meditation tapes ( my favorite is Celestine prophecy meditation CD--Check amazon.com). This one is my favorite!!! Have a nice cup of chamomile tea before bed( natural tranquilizer) and pop in the CD when you go to bed..he talks you through it and you will experience deep relaxation. And lastly exercise!! But get a good sweat out of it!!! When you feel anxious put your hand on your belly and make sure when you are breathing that your are breathing from your belly and not your chest...focus on pushng your tummy out when you exhale. Practise this as often as you think of it.

Just some suggestions!!! Good luck<img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-smile.gif" border="0">

R.N. and mummy to 2 boys...1w/cf+ 1w/o cf

 

[anonymous]

Definitely talk to your doctor. My doctor also put me on Effexor and I really like it. I had a history of panic and depression in my family so when I started to experience those thought that you have I went straight to the doctor. The medicine doesn't neccesarily make the thoughts go away you just don't worry about them as much. It makes me a much happier person and one who doesn't worry as much

I have been taking effexor for almost a year and i haven't had to up my does either, just so you know.

Good luck!

Sue 24w/CF

 

[NoExcuses]

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[NoExcuses]

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[Diane]

Lindsey,
I know that anxiety feeling well, and its horrible while it is happening. I have been on Zoloft for about 3 -1/2 years now for anxiety a lot like what you describe I also have OCD and a little of what you mention sounds like some of the symptoms of what i experience with that. The Zoloft has been a large help to me with the anxiety and panic attacks. When i went to a specialist for the anxiety he gave me a pamphlet and it said this about panic and anxiety......... It is like a fire alarm going off when there is no fire.... Sort of like a fire drill, you go thru the motions of what you would do if there were actually a fire but there isnt a fire so its a dry run. Same thing as a panic attack, the body readies itself for "fight or flight" and theres no reason for it. It tells you when you start feeling anxiety you should immediately do something else such as walk, anything that will break the cycle and deter a full blown attack. It also says you should count as you breathe, this puts your mind on something else besides the feeling of panic and anxiety. I tried this once and was surprised it actually helped a whole lot. Anything that disturbs the cycle and thought process of panic will help. Sitting there focusing on the fear and anxiety will only make it worse. When these feelings of anxiety start your best bet is to get out of bed and go in another room, maybe watch tv in the living room....whatever it takes to get you out of the moment of anxiety will help you( in the meantime till you can get to a specialist) I wish you the best of luck in overcoming this, you can do it Lindsey, you are a strong girl !! <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-smile.gif" border="0"><img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-smile.gif" border="0">

 

[Debi]

I have a somewhat different experience. I had my first anxiety attack about 10 years ago. I have a great relationship with my pulmonologist, who immediately reassured me that it is not at all unusual for people with chronic lung conditions, especially one as serious as cf, to develop anxieties. He prescribed me a short course of lorazepam to see if it helped. Gave me 1 mg tablets which I split in half. I never needed more than 1/2 a day. Bedtime was my trigger so I took it about an hour before going to bed. For me, it was miraculous. I only used it that time for about a month - gave me a break, and stopped the cycle of fretting about going to sleep at night. I have used it off and on ever since. Maybe a week or two twice a year.

A couple years ago my mother died, had to move my dad into a nursing home, had other issues at work and home, and ended up in the hospital with an exacerbation. My pulmonoligist noticed that I was "different" from normal, and said he thought I was suffering from depression. Had a visit with a psychiatrist during my 2 week stay, and started on Celexa. For me, it was incredible. I used it for about 4-6 months, then was weaned off. Haven't needed it since.

For me, the sensation on Celexa or the very lose of lorazepam was one of just having the thoughts pop up, but they are fleeting - they don't consume me, I don't dwell on them. I think the key is to acurately identify if it's anxiety, depression, or both. In my case, my doc was experienced enough to recognize what was going on and addressed it immediately. The depression has never returned. I still do get occasional anxiety attacks, so always have a small amount of lorazepam on hand.

Not all doctors are skilled in dealing with depression and anxiety, so you may do best with a psychiatrist. And, many people have to try more than one medication to find the one that works for them. I was lucky that the first ones worked. Also, if you need something on a daily basis for anxiety, lorazepam would not be the best. You can build up tolerance to it and need higher and higher doses to get the same effect you used to get on the lower dose. I've been lucky there also - 1/2 mg has always done the trick.

Exercise can also help, but for me, it wasn't enough. Whatever you do, do not ignore this. You will literally get your life back when you tackle it. There is nothing "bad" about you - it is extremely common for people with chronic illness to suffer from either anxiety, depression or both. As Amy explained, between the meds we take for cf and the impact of the disease itself, our bodies often cannot produce what is needed to keep our serotonin at the proper level.

You are not alone, and relief is available. Good luck, and hang in there.

Debi
54 w/cf

 

[goingup]

hello, let me start off by saying that  anybody who says that
they DON'T HAVE TIME for exercise is just fooling themselves and in
my opinion, VERY LAZY!  you have to make time... for example,
i will share my daily routine with you... 3 to 4 times a week, i
get up at 5:30 a.m to walk my dog, and yes it is still dark out,
but oh well.... i then go to work at 8 a.m, then get off at 5 p.m
... now mind you i get a hour lunch so every day i walk 30 minutes,
then eat for 30 minutes.... i get home around 5:40 p.m. and about 5
or 6 days a week jump on my road bike and take off.... so please
don't say you have no time, you just aren't motivated to get out of
your warm bed......<img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-happy.gif" border="0"><img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-cool.gif" border="0"><img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-disgusted.gif" border="0"><img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-frown.gif" border="0"><img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-sad.gif" border="0"><img src="i/expressions/sun.gif" border="0">

 

[goingup]

 i accidently hit send, but i was not ready
   .... now, about the anxiety thing, i am a very
neurotic and paranoid person, but wouldn't even consider taking
narcotics, so i resort to essential oils, etc.... and speaking of
dreams, i am going a little off topic here but i habe been having a
reoccuring dream the last two years or so that i amstuck in my room
and there are no windows or doors, then after about 30 seconds i am
actually sitting up in my b ed and snap out of it and my heart is
just racing... i don't dream that every night, but often and it is
sooooo scary, also i dream a lot of me choking on toothpicks, and
pills, any experts on this site who can break it down for me?
  lol, by the way i do not have c/f, but my 24 year old
bro does... thx 4 reading.

 

[letsrockcfem]

Lindsey I think we are both in the same boat here. I feel like I have had anxiety for the past few years and I don't know who to tell!! My problem is that I am known to just about everybody as the happy go lucky, always smiling, laughing person who is always doing Great. I feel that if I tell people these things that they will look down upon me or change the way they thinkg about me. I am all of these things but sometimes especially at night I feel very anxiety stricken. It usually takes a little while to fall asleep at night. Once I fall asleep I wake up and just start thinking about stuff (my worst thing I think about is dying and sometimes I have to get up and walk around the house to make me relax). I also have a habit where I get up and eat between 3am and 6am and I really don't like it. I just wish I could go with a full nights sleep and not have to worry about things and not have to wake up and eat!

I also feel like I have social anxiety which is very wierd because I can get up infront of anybody and talk to them...I can meet new people (If I am with someone I know that makes me comfortable) and get along great with them. But if I am in a situation where I am alone, like a class, a mall, a meeting then I am very quiet and most of the time will find a reason not to go because I get a very bad feeling about it. It is so hard to explain and I have only really told maybe 3 people about this.
I am starting at a new CF center on October 5th and don't know anybody there. I am very excited to go there and I think that is a great time to spill the beans about what's been going on. My family doesn't even know and I tell them everything!

I hope you get this worked out..I don't want to have to take meds but if it is something that needs to be done to correct what's wrong I am all for it.

And..you are not "very lazy "or "unmotivated" for not working out...it is just very hard to fit in all of our treatments, work and daily routines in along with the ever important exercise. And if we all lived in the pefect world it would just work out fine.
Rock CF

 

[coltsfan715]

<div class="FTQUOTE"><begin quote>hello, let me start off by saying that anybody who says that they DON'T HAVE TIME for exercise is just fooling themselves and in my opinion, VERY LAZY! you have to make time... for example, i will share my daily routine with you... 3 to 4 times a week, i get up at 5:30 a.m to walk my dog, and yes it is still dark out, but oh well.... i then go to work at 8 a.m, then get off at 5 p.m ... now mind you i get a hour lunch so every day i walk 30 minutes, then eat for 30 minutes.... i get home around 5:40 p.m. and about 5 or 6 days a week jump on my road bike and take off.... so please don't say you have no time, you just aren't motivated to get out of your warm bed...... </end quote></div>

I just want to say CONGRATU-F-ING-LATIONS because you just won the chance to be the first person to really piss me off to the point that I have to respond in a not so pleasant manner. I did not post this to have someone that does not have anything that can be helpful YET POSITIVE to share can come on here and insult me and call me lazy. For your information I am trying to get on a regular workout routine and want to jump through this computer screen right now and beat the ever living piss out of you. You do not know what it is like to live this life with CF and I don't give a flying hoot if your bro has it YOU DON"T KNOW. I have a hard enough time walking (really walking not just casually strolling) for 10 minutes straight some days because I am so tired, BUT I AM STILL TRYING YOU JACK@$$.

Also my bed isn't so warm as to keep me in it all day I make a point to get up by 9:30-10 even though I do not work (because my health goes downhill so rapidly when I do ... but go ahead and jump on the ride Lindsey's case because she doesn't work train ... I am sure you are dying to start that too). I usually can't get myself to sleep until 2 am or around there. Even though I haven't been getting really any sleep because of these anxiety attacks I still have been getting myself out of bed and I have actually been getting up earlier than I normally do. I just got a treadmill set up in my house TONIGHT and I intend to use that more diligently because it is indoors as I can't get out in the heat and have a decent work out because I struggle to breathe and my blood sugar drops low because I am diabetic -- GO AHEAD BLAME THAT ON ME TOO HOW IF I REALLY WANTED TO HAVE NORMAL BLOOD SUGARS I COULD GO AHEAD BUT IT IS LAZINESS OR WHATEVER.

I normally try to help people out here. I have been having issues with this freaking anxiety lately, but I haven't really said anything to anyone because I don't like to burden people with a bunch of stuff. I just can't take it anymore, so I asked for help as to how I could handle it. I figured that when I was breaking down in tears from exhaustion and the terrifying feeling that I was going to die if I didn't keep myself awake that I needed to figure out the path to take to solve the problem. THE LAST THING I WANTED/NEEDED WAS YOU COMING ON THIS POST AND CALLING ME LAZY AND ACTING LIKE I DON'T DRAG MY ASS OUT OF BED BECAUSE I WOULD RATHER SLEEP. Not that you deserve to know but I wake up and spend hours doing treatments and therapies like most every other person on this board. I do those things so I can maintain. I end up coughing so hard some mornings that yes I do have to take a nap in the afternoon (which is usually in a recliner not my bed and I do not take them everyday) because I am so exhausted from coughing - AGAIN I DON'T EXPECT YOU TO UNDERSTAND BECAUSE YOU DON'T HAVE CF. I am not the healthiest CFer on this board by far - my lung function is at about 40%, but I try my best to do what I can and I do things I just don't have a set routine and I REALLY don't have the patience to deal with someone criticisizing me and my life right now. I don't have the tolerance for it and from now on I don't have the tolerance for you, if you reply WONDERFUL I'LL MAKE SURE TO LET ALL OF MY FRIENDS KNOW.. IF YOU DON'T I WILL CONSIDER MYSELF BLESSED I REALLY DON'T GIVE A RAT'S @$$ EITHER WAY.

I just wanted you to know that you pissed me off with your holier than thou attitude and it was not accepted by me as anything more than that "a holier than thou" attitude. Take your exercise routine, your dog walking whatever the hell it is you do and shove it. It must be nice to have all the energy to do all the $#!t you do in a day. I wish I had half that energy but I DON'T. So what do I do ... I do what has to be done that day and if I have the energy to do the exercise I do. If I don't then I don't, but I do do things .... I don't lay around all freaking day in a bed let alone a warm bed.

So yeah .... I guess what I was trying to say ... is kiss my @$$.

Lindsey

 

[coltsfan715]

Emily,
Thank you for your post. I know what you mean about being afraid to tell anyone. I had a complete breakdown this afternoon with my mom because I just couldn't take it anymore and she has been saying for days how exhausted I look (from not sleeping due to anxiety issues). She was pressuring me saying I looked sick and I needed to go to the doc - which I was calling today anyway. I just said I hadn't been sleeping well and when she asked why I lost it and it all came out. Then she asked why I hadn't said anything sooner. I feel the same way you did like it would be held against me - that and like no one would believe me. They always pick on me about my reactions to things and my worrying and I just figured they would laugh about this too. She has been really supportive and is wanting to help me get help and get past this - whatever it takes.

Good luck with the new CF Center. Also same to you I hope that you are able to talk to the doc about it and start to get it straightened out. Also to add I get serious situational anxiety with large crowds of people - I cant stand it I always end up on the verge of tears when I am in big groups of people (mainly when we are confined to a small area (ie. I can handle going to WDW on a semi busy day, but can't handle being in a dance hall with 200 people).

Thank you again,
Lindsey

 

[Ender]

/big hug Lindsey

 

[Ender]

/big hug Lindsey