Help With Family Life and Self Motivation?

[JennyTPeeps]

Right, I'm 19 years old with Cystic Fibroses. Last year I put myself with a bad crowd of people which resulted in me getting I.V's for 2 weeks at least 4 times in the year till now. My mum and dad have made my situation difficult for me to live in the House, cause when they speak to me we are normally arguing about how terrible my health is and how it hasnt gone up and how I am unable to look after myself. so I ended up leaving them a mounth ago to stay with my Boyfriend (we have only been together 6 mounths and think its early, which is why I am currently trying to get my own flat) But during the time my boyfriends been with me he says that "I do look much healthier than I did at the beggining of the relationship" Even The CF Dr's have said my lung function have gone up. But recently I went on holiday for 4 days with my family to try and keep us close. Problem was I spent most of the Journey on my bum in the car. hardly doing anything. We had another massive fall out of where I look the absolute worse they have ever seen me. I felt horrible and asked my boyfriend to come get me. Since I'v been back I'v been having difficulty persuading myself to leave the house on my own, coughing up a lot more rubbish and unable to sleep properly (Every time I move a little in my sleep it seems to budge the germs in my lungs and make me cough more)<br><br>I have tried to Organise with the Psychologist for CF Patients with my Family before and its always the same, They say they will go to her and then turn to me and say to cancel it cause there is nothing wrong.<div><br></div><div>Ask for trying to get myself out the House I Dont Know What to do. It is really upsetting and I have cried about it. wishing I could do more but I really dunno what else to do. can anyone help?</div>

 

[JennyTPeeps]

Right, I'm 19 years old with Cystic Fibroses. Last year I put myself with a bad crowd of people which resulted in me getting I.V's for 2 weeks at least 4 times in the year till now. My mum and dad have made my situation difficult for me to live in the House, cause when they speak to me we are normally arguing about how terrible my health is and how it hasnt gone up and how I am unable to look after myself. so I ended up leaving them a mounth ago to stay with my Boyfriend (we have only been together 6 mounths and think its early, which is why I am currently trying to get my own flat) But during the time my boyfriends been with me he says that "I do look much healthier than I did at the beggining of the relationship" Even The CF Dr's have said my lung function have gone up. But recently I went on holiday for 4 days with my family to try and keep us close. Problem was I spent most of the Journey on my bum in the car. hardly doing anything. We had another massive fall out of where I look the absolute worse they have ever seen me. I felt horrible and asked my boyfriend to come get me. Since I'v been back I'v been having difficultypersuadingmyself to leave the house on my own, coughing up a lot more rubbish and unable to sleepproperly(Every time I move a little in my sleep it seems to budge the germs in my lungs and make me cough more)<br><br>I have tried to Organise with thePsychologistfor CF Patients with my Family before and its always the same, They say they will go to her and then turn to me and say to cancel it cause there is nothing wrong.<br>Ask for trying to get myself out the House I Dont Know What to do. It is really upsetting and I have cried about it. wishing I could do more but I really dunno what else to do. can anyone help?

 

[JennyTPeeps]

Right, I'm 19 years old with Cystic Fibroses. Last year I put myself with a bad crowd of people which resulted in me getting I.V's for 2 weeks at least 4 times in the year till now. My mum and dad have made my situation difficult for me to live in the House, cause when they speak to me we are normally arguing about how terrible my health is and how it hasnt gone up and how I am unable to look after myself. so I ended up leaving them a mounth ago to stay with my Boyfriend (we have only been together 6 mounths and think its early, which is why I am currently trying to get my own flat) But during the time my boyfriends been with me he says that "I do look much healthier than I did at the beggining of the relationship" Even The CF Dr's have said my lung function have gone up. But recently I went on holiday for 4 days with my family to try and keep us close. Problem was I spent most of the Journey on my bum in the car. hardly doing anything. We had another massive fall out of where I look the absolute worse they have ever seen me. I felt horrible and asked my boyfriend to come get me. Since I'v been back I'v been having difficultypersuadingmyself to leave the house on my own, coughing up a lot more rubbish and unable to sleepproperly(Every time I move a little in my sleep it seems to budge the germs in my lungs and make me cough more)<br><br>I have tried to Organise with thePsychologistfor CF Patients with my Family before and its always the same, They say they will go to her and then turn to me and say to cancel it cause there is nothing wrong.<br>Ask for trying to get myself out the House I Dont Know What to do. It is really upsetting and I have cried about it. wishing I could do more but I really dunno what else to do. can anyone help?

 

[Cojean62]

I can relate to you on the family issues. My parents and I don't really see eye to eye, if you know what I mean. They always hassle me about my health even when it's good. I left home and stayed with a friend for about two weeks but moved back because she said I needed to work it out. Plus she's about to go to collage and I'm only 15. All I can really say to you is to pray about it. God doesn't give you anything more than you can handle. Trust in Him and He will get you through this. That's really the ONLY thing that will help.

 

[Cojean62]

I can relate to you on the family issues. My parents and I don't really see eye to eye, if you know what I mean. They always hassle me about my health even when it's good. I left home and stayed with a friend for about two weeks but moved back because she said I needed to work it out. Plus she's about to go to collage and I'm only 15. All I can really say to you is to pray about it. God doesn't give you anything more than you can handle. Trust in Him and He will get you through this. That's really the ONLY thing that will help.

 

[Cojean62]

I can relate to you on the family issues. My parents and I don't really see eye to eye, if you know what I mean. They always hassle me about my health even when it's good. I left home and stayed with a friend for about two weeks but moved back because she said I needed to work it out. Plus she's about to go to collage and I'm only 15. All I can really say to you is to pray about it. God doesn't give you anything more than you can handle. Trust in Him and He will get you through this. That's really the ONLY thing that will help.

 

[starkey6]

My father died when I was 4. My mother died when I was 11. My older sister was set-up to be my legal guardian, but she was addicted to drugs. I moved out of her house when I was 14 because I couldn't take her problem anymore because I had my own (CF). I moved around a lot...couch surfed, friends, etc. I finally moved in with a family around age 16 that let me stay with them till I became 18 years old. Needless to say, I grew up poor fighting an uphill battle that almost everyone I came in to contact with though I couldn't win. <div><br></div><div>I now live in Las Vegas (2,000+miles) away from where I grew up pursuing a Master's degree in Higher Education working full time. How did I do it? <br><div><br></div><div>I exercised constantly - drastically improved my CF and helped me rid myself of some of that rage and anger. Still do it and it's the only reason I am maintaining good health. I stay up to date with my treatments too!!</div></div><div><br></div><div>I remained optimistic - and when I found myself being pessimistic, I would tell myself out loud to stop it. I often have to kick myself in the butt when I'm getting down. </div><div><br></div><div>I got a degree via student loans, CF scholarships (networking!!!)</div><div><br></div><div>I stayed in contact with my family but never relied on them for anything!  </div><div><br></div><div>I rap and sing loudly to clear out my lungs...works like a charm!</div><div><br></div><div>I work hard and stay busy. It clears your mind! </div><div><br></div>

 

[starkey6]

My father died when I was 4. My mother died when I was 11. My older sister was set-up to be my legal guardian, but she was addicted to drugs. I moved out of her house when I was 14 because I couldn't take her problem anymore because I had my own (CF). I moved around a lot...couch surfed, friends, etc. I finally moved in with a family around age 16 that let me stay with them till I became 18 years old. Needless to say, I grew up poor fighting an uphill battle that almost everyone I came in to contact with though I couldn't win.<br>I now live in Las Vegas (2,000+miles) away from where I grew up pursuing a Master's degree in Higher Education working full time. How did I do it?<br><br>I exercised constantly - drastically improved my CF and helped me rid myself of some of that rage and anger. Still do it and it's the only reason I am maintaining good health. I stay up to date with my treatments too!!<br>I remained optimistic - and when I found myself beingpessimistic, I would tell myself out loud to stop it. I often have to kick myself in the butt when I'm getting down.<br>I got a degree via student loans, CF scholarships (networking!!!)<br>I stayed in contact with my family but never relied on them for anything! <br>I rap and sing loudly to clear out my lungs...works like a charm!<br>I work hard and stay busy. It clears your mind!<br>

 

[starkey6]

My father died when I was 4. My mother died when I was 11. My older sister was set-up to be my legal guardian, but she was addicted to drugs. I moved out of her house when I was 14 because I couldn't take her problem anymore because I had my own (CF). I moved around a lot...couch surfed, friends, etc. I finally moved in with a family around age 16 that let me stay with them till I became 18 years old. Needless to say, I grew up poor fighting an uphill battle that almost everyone I came in to contact with though I couldn't win.<br>I now live in Las Vegas (2,000+miles) away from where I grew up pursuing a Master's degree in Higher Education working full time. How did I do it?<br><br>I exercised constantly - drastically improved my CF and helped me rid myself of some of that rage and anger. Still do it and it's the only reason I am maintaining good health. I stay up to date with my treatments too!!<br>I remained optimistic - and when I found myself beingpessimistic, I would tell myself out loud to stop it. I often have to kick myself in the butt when I'm getting down.<br>I got a degree via student loans, CF scholarships (networking!!!)<br>I stayed in contact with my family but never relied on them for anything! <br>I rap and sing loudly to clear out my lungs...works like a charm!<br>I work hard and stay busy. It clears your mind!<br>

 

[ManFromDublin]

<br>ah for jesus sake, the girl wants help on her family situation, not inspirational speeches about exercise and education.my advice is just relax.i have the same problem wit my ma and da.there are certain people in life who need to hound at you like a dog...your ma and da probably love u and want the best for you but their tactics are shite.if you feel healthy...then u are healthy.if you think you look good...then u do look good.you were given this illness, you didnt ask for it.i hate my parents because they use cf as a weapon against me.for example...if they didnt want me out late, it was because i need my sleep otherwise my chest will get worse.Me arse!!they just didnt want me out late FULL STOP!but they use the cf to enforce their point.the result.....i hate cf and hate my parents for usin my biggest insecurity against me.No winners here.

 

[ManFromDublin]

<br>ah forjesus sake, the girl wants help on her family situation, not inspirational speeches about exercise and education.my advice is just relax.i have the same problem wit my ma and da.there are certain people in life who need to hound at you like a dog...your ma and da probably love u and want the best for you but their tactics are shite.if you feel healthy...then u are healthy.if you think you look good...then u do look good.you were given this illness, you didnt ask for it.i hate my parents because they use cf as a weapon against me.for example...if they didnt want me out late, it was because i need my sleep otherwise my chest will get worse.Me arse!!they just didnt want me out late FULL STOP!but they use the cf to enforce their point.the result.....i hate cf and hate my parents for usin my biggestinsecurity against me.No winners here.

 

[ManFromDublin]

<p><br>ah forjesus sake, the girl wants help on her family situation, not inspirational speeches about exercise and education.<p>my advice is just relax.<p>i have the same problem wit my ma and da.<p>there are certain people in life who need to hound at you like a dog...your ma and da probably love u and want the best for you but their tactics are shite.<p>if you feel healthy...then u are healthy.<p>if you think you look good...then u do look good.<p>you were given this illness, you didnt ask for it.<p>i hate my parents because they use cf as a weapon against me.<p>for example...if they didnt want me out late, it was because i need my sleep otherwise my chest will get worse.<p>Me arse!!<p>they just didnt want me out late FULL STOP!<p>but they use the cf to enforce their point.<p>the result.....i hate cf and hate my parents for usin my biggestinsecurity against me.<p>No winners here.

 

[amberlydutton]

Your family wants what is best for you , you are young, and at that age I thought I knew it all to. I have two young son's with CF and I am living without them... Do your best to keep up with your treatments and care. I know how hard it is and how tired and that you get so sick of doing your treatment's ,but it's your life. Your decision's for the good or bad affect everyone around you who love and care for you. Not everyone think's that family is everything...but in the end and you look around, family is usually what's right there in front of you. Hang in there.

 

[amberlydutton]

Your family wants what is best for you , you are young, and at that age I thought I knew it all to. I have two young son's with CF and I am living without them... Do your best to keep up with your treatments and care. I know how hard it is and how tired and that you get so sick of doing your treatment's ,but it's your life. Your decision's for the good or bad affect everyone around you who love and care for you. Not everyone think's that family is everything...but in the end and you look around, family is usually what's right there in front of you. Hang in there.

 

[amberlydutton]

Your family wants what is best for you , you are young, and at that age I thought I knew it all to. I have two young son's with CF and I am living without them... Do your best to keep up with your treatments and care. I know how hard it is and how tired and that you get so sick of doing your treatment's ,but it's your life. Your decision's for the good or bad affect everyone around you who love and care for you. Not everyone think's that family is everything...but in the end and you look around, family is usually what's right there in front of you. Hang in there.

 

[JaneCFer]

I can empathize. My mom is overbearing. She never used to be when I was little even when I pretty sick. In recent years I have experienced more of a decline and she is ALWAYS on my case. Its out of love and it helps to remember that. I just recommend being SUPER on top of your treatments and when you are gonna be around her just make sure to do one before you see her. I hope this helps. God bless!

 

[JaneCFer]

I can empathize. My mom is overbearing. She never used to be when I was little even when I pretty sick. In recent years I have experienced more of a decline and she is ALWAYS on my case. Its out of love and it helps to remember that. I just recommend being SUPER on top of your treatments and when you are gonna be around her just make sure to do one before you see her. I hope this helps. God bless!

 

[JaneCFer]

I can empathize. My mom is overbearing. She never used to be when I was little even when I pretty sick. In recent years I have experienced more of a decline and she is ALWAYS on my case. Its out of love and it helps to remember that. I just recommend being SUPER on top of your treatments and when you are gonna be around her just make sure to do one before you see her. I hope this helps. God bless!

 

[Beccamom]

Have you considered that maybe your parents are terrified of your CF. My daughter is almost 11 and she is in diagnostic limbo regarding her diagnosis of CF. Just the possibility that she has CF terrifies me. I would definately sacrifice my daughter's opinion of me if I fealt that it was the only way to get her to do her treatments and then have a chance to out live me. I often dream that I have donated my lungs to my daughter who is now in my dream living free of lung disease and I am watching down on her from heaven. It is crazy what a mom will do for her daughter. I would do anything. I am fortunate that so far our relationship has gotten closer as she has begun many CF treatments. Tonight she went on this website for the first time and I hope she doesn't get depressed about the disease especially since we don't know for sure if she has it. However, I also hope she sees the consequences of not doing treatments and continues to be proactive with her care. Try to start a serious talk with your parents about how they feel about CF. Ask for the truth without the sugar coating. You may be surprised about what you hear (fear versus anger). I wish you the best.

 

[Beccamom]

Have you considered that maybe your parents are terrified of your CF. My daughter is almost 11 and she is in diagnostic limbo regarding her diagnosis of CF. Just the possibility that she has CF terrifies me. I would definately sacrifice my daughter's opinion of me if I fealt that it was the only way to get her to do her treatments and then have a chance to out live me. I often dream that I have donated my lungs to my daughter who is now in my dream living free of lung disease and I am watching down on her from heaven. It is crazy what a mom will do for her daughter. I would do anything. I am fortunate that so far our relationship has gotten closer as she has begun many CF treatments. Tonight she went on this website for the first time and I hope she doesn't get depressed about the disease especially since we don't know for sure if she has it. However, I also hope she sees the consequences of not doing treatments and continues to be proactive with her care. Try to start a serious talk with your parents about how they feel about CF. Ask for the truth without the sugar coating. You may be surprised about what you hear (fear versus anger). I wish you the best.