Jenn, how is Jenny O?

C

catboogie

New member
hey jenn,

maybe it is the time of year--who knows--but i have found myself reminiscing a lot lately. i have been thinking of john... i have been missing him terribly. i can't believe it has been three months. his death has taken a long time to sink in for me--it is finally feeling more real.

i went to the old CF2Chat site and downloaded a bunch of pictures from peoples' photo albums--many of him, but also of other people on there who i care about. that was difficult--seeing him--i'd been wanting to go get some photos of him but i had to wait until the right time...

he is so happy and full of life in those pictures. and i know he would not want us to keep being sad about him not being here but it is so hard to understand... i don't want the pictures or my memories to be all that is left of him! i want him to be there-- but in my imagination, he is never there lying in the hospital, getting infusions and transfusions and on the bipap machine... he is back home doing the things he loves. i guess there was no way for him to be released from that hospital, though, in reality. now his soul is free to snowboard and kitesurf and do all kinds of john-things (clean? <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-smile.gif" border="0"> ) without the weight of the disease on him.

enough about me. i have been thinking about all you are going through and how much harder it must be when you are down one of your best friends... how are you holding up with all this??

i also have been wondering about jenny and how she is doing. i don't know how anyone can be expected to be "doing" when they lose someone like she did...but i have been thinking of her...if possible i wanted her to know that and to know that john may be gone but he will never ever be forgotten. <img src="i/expressions/heart.gif" border="0">
 
C

catboogie

New member
hey jenn,

maybe it is the time of year--who knows--but i have found myself reminiscing a lot lately. i have been thinking of john... i have been missing him terribly. i can't believe it has been three months. his death has taken a long time to sink in for me--it is finally feeling more real.

i went to the old CF2Chat site and downloaded a bunch of pictures from peoples' photo albums--many of him, but also of other people on there who i care about. that was difficult--seeing him--i'd been wanting to go get some photos of him but i had to wait until the right time...

he is so happy and full of life in those pictures. and i know he would not want us to keep being sad about him not being here but it is so hard to understand... i don't want the pictures or my memories to be all that is left of him! i want him to be there-- but in my imagination, he is never there lying in the hospital, getting infusions and transfusions and on the bipap machine... he is back home doing the things he loves. i guess there was no way for him to be released from that hospital, though, in reality. now his soul is free to snowboard and kitesurf and do all kinds of john-things (clean? <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-smile.gif" border="0"> ) without the weight of the disease on him.

enough about me. i have been thinking about all you are going through and how much harder it must be when you are down one of your best friends... how are you holding up with all this??

i also have been wondering about jenny and how she is doing. i don't know how anyone can be expected to be "doing" when they lose someone like she did...but i have been thinking of her...if possible i wanted her to know that and to know that john may be gone but he will never ever be forgotten. <img src="i/expressions/heart.gif" border="0">
 
C

catboogie

New member
hey jenn,

maybe it is the time of year--who knows--but i have found myself reminiscing a lot lately. i have been thinking of john... i have been missing him terribly. i can't believe it has been three months. his death has taken a long time to sink in for me--it is finally feeling more real.

i went to the old CF2Chat site and downloaded a bunch of pictures from peoples' photo albums--many of him, but also of other people on there who i care about. that was difficult--seeing him--i'd been wanting to go get some photos of him but i had to wait until the right time...

he is so happy and full of life in those pictures. and i know he would not want us to keep being sad about him not being here but it is so hard to understand... i don't want the pictures or my memories to be all that is left of him! i want him to be there-- but in my imagination, he is never there lying in the hospital, getting infusions and transfusions and on the bipap machine... he is back home doing the things he loves. i guess there was no way for him to be released from that hospital, though, in reality. now his soul is free to snowboard and kitesurf and do all kinds of john-things (clean? <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-smile.gif" border="0"> ) without the weight of the disease on him.

enough about me. i have been thinking about all you are going through and how much harder it must be when you are down one of your best friends... how are you holding up with all this??

i also have been wondering about jenny and how she is doing. i don't know how anyone can be expected to be "doing" when they lose someone like she did...but i have been thinking of her...if possible i wanted her to know that and to know that john may be gone but he will never ever be forgotten. <img src="i/expressions/heart.gif" border="0">
 
J

JennifersHope

New member
Sorry Laura I didn't see this before now.... I will Im you and speak to you through yahoo. But I totally understand what you mean... I think it is good to remember John doing the things that he loved to, snow boarding, skateboarding, bike riding, kayacking, etc... That was the spirit of John.. always on the go, always doing stuff and always on a time schedule.. I used to call him the time gestepo. I loved talking to him so much, I loved being at their home and seeing his real life it was amazing.. When John died, I lost my good friend, my therapist and so, so much more.


I miss him so much as well, I think because I have been so sick it really hasn't sunk it... I went in the hospital the day after I flew home from being out there with him and have been pretty sick since then....

Since the first time I flew out there to meet him I went a few times so I have been really blessed. I also met a bunch of other CFers a few years ago, I have collected so many pictures..I took pictures of John, Jenny, Rich, and so many others,

I have the pictures of when I spent Christmas out there.. I have pictures of John opening the skateboard that I bought him...the really special one that he wanted with the crazy orange wheels.. and then a million goofy pictures of him making silly poses while "riding" it.. I am so glad I bought him that skateboard I can't even tell you....I have pictures of the three of us making dog treats for their dog Jack... I have pictures of John Ice Kiting.... and me pretending to....My favorite is actually a picture of the TV screen that I took while I was there.. It is a picture of the movie.."It is a Wonderful Like" I had never seen that movie before and John and Jenny bought it for me for Christmas and we were watching it... I took the picture of the movie because I remember while I was watching that movie with them and counting my blessings.. I was thinking of what a wonderful life it was.

My computer screen saver is my photo albums and so I am constantly surrounded by wonderful memories....I wouldn't trade one minute of them.

So many times I think of things I want to tell him or things that he would think were funny, or things he would call me a "dork" for and it just makes me cry. I know where John is though, he is in Heaven, and he is safe and without sickness and that warms my heart.

My heart is broken for Jenny and for John's parents.....and I know that the only way they will be able to move forward is through prayer.


Jennifer
 
J

JennifersHope

New member
Sorry Laura I didn't see this before now.... I will Im you and speak to you through yahoo. But I totally understand what you mean... I think it is good to remember John doing the things that he loved to, snow boarding, skateboarding, bike riding, kayacking, etc... That was the spirit of John.. always on the go, always doing stuff and always on a time schedule.. I used to call him the time gestepo. I loved talking to him so much, I loved being at their home and seeing his real life it was amazing.. When John died, I lost my good friend, my therapist and so, so much more.


I miss him so much as well, I think because I have been so sick it really hasn't sunk it... I went in the hospital the day after I flew home from being out there with him and have been pretty sick since then....

Since the first time I flew out there to meet him I went a few times so I have been really blessed. I also met a bunch of other CFers a few years ago, I have collected so many pictures..I took pictures of John, Jenny, Rich, and so many others,

I have the pictures of when I spent Christmas out there.. I have pictures of John opening the skateboard that I bought him...the really special one that he wanted with the crazy orange wheels.. and then a million goofy pictures of him making silly poses while "riding" it.. I am so glad I bought him that skateboard I can't even tell you....I have pictures of the three of us making dog treats for their dog Jack... I have pictures of John Ice Kiting.... and me pretending to....My favorite is actually a picture of the TV screen that I took while I was there.. It is a picture of the movie.."It is a Wonderful Like" I had never seen that movie before and John and Jenny bought it for me for Christmas and we were watching it... I took the picture of the movie because I remember while I was watching that movie with them and counting my blessings.. I was thinking of what a wonderful life it was.

My computer screen saver is my photo albums and so I am constantly surrounded by wonderful memories....I wouldn't trade one minute of them.

So many times I think of things I want to tell him or things that he would think were funny, or things he would call me a "dork" for and it just makes me cry. I know where John is though, he is in Heaven, and he is safe and without sickness and that warms my heart.

My heart is broken for Jenny and for John's parents.....and I know that the only way they will be able to move forward is through prayer.


Jennifer
 
J

JennifersHope

New member
Sorry Laura I didn't see this before now.... I will Im you and speak to you through yahoo. But I totally understand what you mean... I think it is good to remember John doing the things that he loved to, snow boarding, skateboarding, bike riding, kayacking, etc... That was the spirit of John.. always on the go, always doing stuff and always on a time schedule.. I used to call him the time gestepo. I loved talking to him so much, I loved being at their home and seeing his real life it was amazing.. When John died, I lost my good friend, my therapist and so, so much more.


I miss him so much as well, I think because I have been so sick it really hasn't sunk it... I went in the hospital the day after I flew home from being out there with him and have been pretty sick since then....

Since the first time I flew out there to meet him I went a few times so I have been really blessed. I also met a bunch of other CFers a few years ago, I have collected so many pictures..I took pictures of John, Jenny, Rich, and so many others,

I have the pictures of when I spent Christmas out there.. I have pictures of John opening the skateboard that I bought him...the really special one that he wanted with the crazy orange wheels.. and then a million goofy pictures of him making silly poses while "riding" it.. I am so glad I bought him that skateboard I can't even tell you....I have pictures of the three of us making dog treats for their dog Jack... I have pictures of John Ice Kiting.... and me pretending to....My favorite is actually a picture of the TV screen that I took while I was there.. It is a picture of the movie.."It is a Wonderful Like" I had never seen that movie before and John and Jenny bought it for me for Christmas and we were watching it... I took the picture of the movie because I remember while I was watching that movie with them and counting my blessings.. I was thinking of what a wonderful life it was.

My computer screen saver is my photo albums and so I am constantly surrounded by wonderful memories....I wouldn't trade one minute of them.

So many times I think of things I want to tell him or things that he would think were funny, or things he would call me a "dork" for and it just makes me cry. I know where John is though, he is in Heaven, and he is safe and without sickness and that warms my heart.

My heart is broken for Jenny and for John's parents.....and I know that the only way they will be able to move forward is through prayer.


Jennifer
 
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