questions about how you were raised

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Seana30

New member
I just thought of something................

Did any of you watch House last night.

It was about teenage girl who had severe allergies and a heart transplant and mom kept her in her room which was a "clean room".

Needless to say, girl was sneaking in her boyfriend at night and hated her mother for what she was doing. The girl finally just gave up.....she felt she had nothing to live for because mom was never going to allow her to truely live a normal life.

It took the girl giving up before mom realized what she was doing to her daughter, and had to give up some control.

It was a really good episode, and was a lot like what we are discussing here.

Seana
 
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anonymous

New member
Yes I watched House. I like the whole story and how persistant Dr. House was. Pretty intense episode especially being a transplant pt. myself. Risa
 
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anonymous

New member
I was treated very normal. IN addition to CF I have a serious congenital eye condition and had multiple life threatening food allergies as a kid

Yet I played in the dirt, took riding lessons for years, loved animals and had/have tons of pets, went to waterparks, took piano lessons at a huge music studio place here instead of one on one lessons, swam in lakes, rivers, the ocean, pools..both ours and public pools. Spent the night with friends, our house was also loaded with kids, went to camp(not CF camp), had a good friend with CF

My mom was a SAHM so no daycare for me though. My parents planned that before I was born. I have an older brother and they decided when/if they had a 2nd a child my mom would quit her job.

I went to public school until 8th grade when we started homeschooling which I loved! I hated, despised public school and LOVED homeschooling. I was just too sick at that point, missed tons of school and the public schools here are AWFUL so my parents decided to pull my out. Best thing they ever did! I feel I missed nothing but not going to public school. I should add we have a HUGE homeschooling population here and belonged to big statewide association and local group. Unfortunatly my health was not good during my teen years and is still fragile though it has limited me in some ways, my parents have never limited me
 
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JazzysMom

New member
I dont really remember how we were in the hygeine department, but I played in the rivers, made mud pies, helped the neighbor during haying season etc. As far as sleep overs I didnt have a lot, BUT either did my other siblings. Just like we werent encouraged to go to college or play sports so I know it wasnt my CF that influenced that. I can say that I think my Mom should have been more strict with me. I didnt do treatments most of my life tho I did take enzymes (because I didnt want the runs all the time) & antibiotics as needed. I was spoiled & ran wild as a teenager. It was never "discussed" why I had the leniancy, but the underlying reason was known quite well by all of us. I wasnt suppose to live long so let me enjoy things. If my daughter did or tried to do 1/2 of what I did, she would be grounded until she was 100. At the time I thought it was great that I had such freedom, but here we are 30 years later looking back realizing that if it wasnt for my natural ability to adapt, I wouldnt be prepared to live as an adult let alone an adult with CF. Would I trade it or change it? Only the part about college....I would be a CPA making mega $$$$!
 
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ReneeP

New member
Just to throw my 2 cents worth in as the mother of five, two with CF, I agree totally with Liza. Just about the only thing I have a strict rule about avoiding is hot tubs. My kids do anything any other kid does except that.

As far as the daycare issue, I think it's unfair to make someone feel guilty about having their child in daycare. Believe me, I felt horribly guilty and spent many a night crying worrying about what my children might be exposed to in daycare. Unfortunately the only other option would have been to move to the slums and live on welfare and I chose to work and use daycare instead. I did take them out once and put them in a small, home daycare thinking it would be less exposure to germs... Well, that lasted until I picked up my children one day and they told me how much fun they had that morning while their daycare provider slept until noon and they were being babysat by some man who had spent the night with her the night before. The kids went right back to daycare where I at least knew they were being monitored and they stayed there until they went to school.

In a perfect world, we could all stay home and "raise our children". And in a perfect world there would be no CF. This is not a perfect world and people are forced to make decisions they may not really want to make but have no choice. Daycare is not the end of the world. My girls are totally healthy. One has a FEV1 of 155 and the other 123. I can't imagine they'd be any better if they had not been in daycare. And if they had not gone to daycare, they would have gotten much sicker when they started school because they would not have built up an immune system.

I feel for those with kids in daycare reading the above post and feeling guilty that they have to put their kids in daycare...but knowing they have no choice. Do not feel guilty. Daycare does not kill children. It will only build their immune system a little earlier than if they waited until they started school.

Just my thoughts.
 
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lovingBenandCambree

New member
I was very fortunate that my parents let me live a normal childhood. I played in the creek. Played with snakes, (which now I am deathly afraid of). Went to sleepovers, stayed up for all nighters, rode horses, basically anything that a normal child would do and I am so grateful for that. I am cautious as I am older but still take Cambree to a little gym weekly, take her to play at McDonalds, take her swimming. I just use purell like crazy now. I think that it is very important for a CF child to feel normal in a not so normal body. Growing up I was very ashamed of my disease and didn't want anyone to know that I had it. Especially in Elementary school and Middle school. I can't imagine how I would have been if everyone in my family treated me different.

Emilee
 
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lovingBenandCambree

New member
I think that this is a very touchy subject and that no mother should be put down or blamed for putting there child in daycare. Sometimes there isn't an option to stay home with there child. I feel that if this were the case then95% of mothers would do it. I know for us this was very much the case. Luckily my mom had friends that watched kids so we were able to go there intstead of a daycare. I wouldn't say that a mother doesn't care enough about her kid to not stay home with her. If I were the mother that would be very insulting to me. I am not trying to start anything, but I would hate for a mother to come on here and feel that she can't share because others say that she doens't care about her kids enough. It is fine to state the facts, but don't go and say that a mother doesn't care enough especially when you don't know all of the circumstances.

Amy, I am not trying to turn this over as a personal attack at all. I think you are an awesome person but I know how I would feel if I had to put my child in daycare and I read this.

And sometimes the sky is gray<img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-happy.gif" border="0">

Emilee
 
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Emily65Roses

New member
<div class="FTQUOTE"><begin quote><i>Originally posted by: <b>amy</b></i>
If facts make you feel guilty, then maybe the guilt is trying to tell you something...</end quote></div>
Not everyone has a choice. That was said. So even if the guilt is telling you something, it's not going to help.

<div class="FTQUOTE"><begin quote>And the facts remain. Those chilren who are in day care are at a higher risk of infection, especially with multi-drug resistant bacteria. That's a fact.</end quote></div>
I'd like to see this information for myself. Got any links from reliable sources you could share?

<div class="FTQUOTE"><begin quote>If you want to give your kid the best chance of having a healthy life, the fact remains that day care isn't a good choice.</end quote></div>
The phrase "good choice" by nature is an opinion, not fact. So I have to disagree with this piece entirely.

<div class="FTQUOTE"><begin quote>If you dont' like the fact that they sky is blue, don't get mad at me either.</end quote></div>
Isn't this statement a little juvenile? I know I'm hardly one to talk for words chosen in any state of temper, but when I'm wrong, I say so. So I figured I'd point out for you that that's ridiculous.

<div class="FTQUOTE"><begin quote>And i feel bad for the kid in day care. If i were that kid, I would hope that my mom would care enough to listen to the facts and keep me at home with her.</end quote></div>
This response isn't to Amy, but for any people who have kids in daycare. Not everyone has a choice. If you don't, don't let it eat you up. Not everyone is rich and/or privileged enough to be able to afford to stay at home with their kids. And regardless of whether or not you can, I think daycare is as normal as public school. So for those parents, don't let these statements get to you. I, for one, think it's a load of unnecessary garbage.
 
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Allie

New member
I don't have much to say except my daughter goes to daycare. I must be a really bad parent. Much better than I quit my job and go on welfare so Ahava avoids a cold.
 
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Faust

New member
I personally think every childs immune system needs to be toughened up. My niece is normal (non cf anyways) and 7 years old. She is ALWAYS sick, even more now because she is in regular school around all the other typhoid mary's. She had had countless yeast infections due to them using tons of antibiotics on her. She has been tested for everything and is normal. Her father is an ultra germ freak. Constant antibacterial hand washing, wouldn't let her play in the dirt at all, constantly wiping down the entire inside of all surfaces of the house with those antimicrobial wipes...I'm sure you know the type in which I am speaking. He was that way her entire childhood, and look how she turns out.


Me on the other hand, Hygiene was a general joke to me. I played in the dirt, played in the mud, hell we even used to play in construction sites for huge sprawling subdivision housing sites playing king of the giant mountain of dirt, swim in all kinds of horrible water (though didn't go under)...And just generally played like we were raised by wolves. I didn't get pseudo till I was in my early teens, and that could have been from CF summer camp for all I know. Here I am now at 35, and though I of course have some lung damage, my PFT's last check were 99% and i'm slightly overweight.

My niece is singlehandedly destroying antibiotic usefullness, and i'm fine. Let kids be kids within reason...If a certain place used to be heavy agriculture and cepacia was used quite a bit, be careful with the dirt thing. But other than that, let them have fun. You could raise them in a bubble of paranoia, and they could get hit and killed by a car in their teens anyways (I was involved in one).
 
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Emily65Roses

New member
Sorry, but I've met a LOT of stupid doctors and won't take their word as gospel. I prefer to read articles or published papers on the subject. If you have any of those, I will happily read. Otherwise, I'm good.

I never said your statement being juvenile was a fact. I don't state my opinions as fact, because I'm aware that they're <i><b>opinions</b></i>. I just shared it, as you just said you're doing and will continue to do. Same here.
 
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