OK I debated whether to post this, but I figure once this passes that my CF might be the next issue to address. My daughter told me last night that when her class did the school play and one of the kids saw that her Dad was black she ask why he was black. I asked her if this girl said it because she was surprised (my daughter is very light skinned) or did she seem upset about it? She didnt know so I told her that if it is really bothering her she needs to find out. If its because the girl was surprised then thats expected since Jazz is so light. If its because the girl was upset because her family might believe that blacks/whites should be together then she needs to learn to deal with that because she will encounter other people who feel that way. She said she just didnt like people talking about her Mom/Dad. My husband heard our conversation and said he was in the hall of the school when this conversation took place & he said the girl seemed surprised more than upset. It just made me realize that its the beginnig of a few things & wanted input on how to handle it when it gets to my CF which eventually I know it will. I dont know how "detailed" it will get, but I was curious to wonder how those of you CF parents handled such issues if they ever arose for your kids?
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Racial issues starting
- Thread starter JazzysMom
- Start date
cfgirl2008
New member
I don't think I can help you there sorry, even though my mom is white and my stepdad is black, people really don't say anything about that even though i am white i do have black in me from my great great grandparents even tho somewat you cant tell. I hope everything goes alrite and no one starts in a racial fight.
tiffany 15 w/cf
tiffany 15 w/cf
wanderlost
New member
What kind of town do you live in? Is it uncommon to see interracial relationships? Where I live it is very very common, so nothing like that has really happened in my family. Of course racism exists here, but I haven't had to deal with it yet in my own family - hopefully I won't have to. Probably the girl was just suprized to find out about it. I wonder if your daughter is umcomfortable about it somehow? I know at certain ages kids get weird about the strangest things.
We live in a very diverse area. Many inter racial relationships and quite a few bi racial children in Jazz's grade. Yet prejudicial views still run high. I guess that will never change. I wasnt there for this conversation with the little girl so I dont know the "tone" that it was asked in. I think with me being the Mom I would have picked up on something that my husband didnt. I could be wrong. It happened once before>LOL. In the meantime I just reinforce that she is so lucky to have a Mom and Dad who love her just the way she is (etc, etc, etc). I tried not to over do the black/white talk, but to chalk it up to what some people believe. That doesnt make it wrong or right just not how we live or what we believe. Its heart breaking tho. I was always so confident that I would raise her to be soooooo proud of who she was that I thought NOTHING would rattle her. I guess I forgot how hurtful kids can be at times even with the most support & love you have at home!
JazzysMom
Hello i am Kaits mom, I am white and my husband is bi-racial, ( black and white ) well anyway our children are very light and so is my husband. We live in a WHITE community, alot of racial people. I think that there is only 3 black or bi-racial children in the middle and high school combined. Anyway, just recently we took custody of my husbands 2 younger brothers, 14 and 17yrs old. The oldest has graduated high school already and the younger is in his first year of high school. Well anyway he tells me all of the time that there are alot of kids in school that do not like him because of his skin color but i do know that he has made several friends, stays overnight with other guys and has even joined the wrestling team, he knows that no matter what i ( we ) will be there for him in any situation and any racial problems will not be tolerated, he is such a good kid and i was really worried about how others would take to him but i also knew that I would be there for him. It is so sad that there are so many people that do not like others because of skin color.
Kaitsmom<img src="i/expressions/rose.gif" border="0">
Hello i am Kaits mom, I am white and my husband is bi-racial, ( black and white ) well anyway our children are very light and so is my husband. We live in a WHITE community, alot of racial people. I think that there is only 3 black or bi-racial children in the middle and high school combined. Anyway, just recently we took custody of my husbands 2 younger brothers, 14 and 17yrs old. The oldest has graduated high school already and the younger is in his first year of high school. Well anyway he tells me all of the time that there are alot of kids in school that do not like him because of his skin color but i do know that he has made several friends, stays overnight with other guys and has even joined the wrestling team, he knows that no matter what i ( we ) will be there for him in any situation and any racial problems will not be tolerated, he is such a good kid and i was really worried about how others would take to him but i also knew that I would be there for him. It is so sad that there are so many people that do not like others because of skin color.
Kaitsmom<img src="i/expressions/rose.gif" border="0">
6
65rosessamurai
Guest
I needed to think about this issue a while before posting, myself.
Though racial issues are primarily focused on the black in some areas, in other areas it has been the Native Americans. (and in some, so on and so on)
I have only about, maybe 1/8 or less of Native American blood in me (My great grandmother was Mohawk, and my great grandfather was Oneida), with a mix of German and Irish (probably at least 50% irish because my grandparents had last names like; O'Loughlin and Fitzgerald).
Perhaps, because of that, my mother had taught us to be non-prejudice as we grew up.
It reminds me of a story I heard from my mom, but it's not pertinent to this, exactly.
For me, living in a "homogeneous society", such as Japan, their racial issues are mostly towards foreigners, and only rarely are towards themselves.
I suppose being married to a person of a different race, I can easily understand the problems you must face sometimes. It also reminds me that I will have to be aware of a possibility that it may someday happen to me, too.
Using my mother as an example, I truely believe the racial problem would dissolve as long as the parents teach their children that it is not something to make an issue out of. I know for those who are of bi-racial marriage, they teach their childeren the best they can on how to deal with those situations, but it's the hope that the non-bi-racial parents teach thier children to not judge others based on skin color, etc.
To Kaitsmom, I'm glad to hear one of your husband's younger brothers is learning how to adapt to the various kinds of people, and learn good "people" skills. I'm sure in that aspect, he will learn on his own which people are worth hanging around with, and which are not. Cheers
Though racial issues are primarily focused on the black in some areas, in other areas it has been the Native Americans. (and in some, so on and so on)
I have only about, maybe 1/8 or less of Native American blood in me (My great grandmother was Mohawk, and my great grandfather was Oneida), with a mix of German and Irish (probably at least 50% irish because my grandparents had last names like; O'Loughlin and Fitzgerald).
Perhaps, because of that, my mother had taught us to be non-prejudice as we grew up.
It reminds me of a story I heard from my mom, but it's not pertinent to this, exactly.
For me, living in a "homogeneous society", such as Japan, their racial issues are mostly towards foreigners, and only rarely are towards themselves.
I suppose being married to a person of a different race, I can easily understand the problems you must face sometimes. It also reminds me that I will have to be aware of a possibility that it may someday happen to me, too.
Using my mother as an example, I truely believe the racial problem would dissolve as long as the parents teach their children that it is not something to make an issue out of. I know for those who are of bi-racial marriage, they teach their childeren the best they can on how to deal with those situations, but it's the hope that the non-bi-racial parents teach thier children to not judge others based on skin color, etc.
To Kaitsmom, I'm glad to hear one of your husband's younger brothers is learning how to adapt to the various kinds of people, and learn good "people" skills. I'm sure in that aspect, he will learn on his own which people are worth hanging around with, and which are not. Cheers