Sinus Infection and dating advice...

[JennifersHope]

This is one of the times I wish I could post not signed in...

Well I kind of knew this was going to happen, I have a sinus infection AGAIN that I woke up with... I went to the doctor, my primary, and turned myself in, I told him I was guilty of not doing my treatments the past two weeks because of being to tired from work.... blah blah blah........I feel like such a baby because my doctor gave me the lecture today, it is my own fault, I was telling him how I quit the clinical trial and I said I am barely compliant with my regular meds, how was I going to do a study.. He said, did I hear what I just said.. Barely compliant... I was so embarrassed..... he was so nice about it, he was teasing me telling me that I give him chest pain...HA..

I also told him that I have started to kind of 'see" someone.... sort of in the very beginning stages of dating... and as it would turn out, the guy is a doctor, not from the state I live in, but not so far away either.. I was telling my doctor about it, and that I haven't told this guy anything about my health yet... My doctor told me that I was starting the relationship out based on a lie.. OUCH.... I can't bring myself to tell him..and better I find out now that he isn't able to cope then down the road.. I know he is right.... I keep thinking it isn't going to work out anyway so why bother... but I know I need to tell him but can't at the same time.. I mean ugggggg... In a way I feel so selfish like I should not dare to try to mess up someone else's life with my own mess.. This guy wants to have kids, a life, and stuff.. I know in my head the right answer that this would be his choice, but I can't get past it...I know what I would say to someone else but I can't apply it to myself... I feel like I would be better off single then feeling like I screwed up someones life, and I also am pretty sure I wouldn't get the chance anyway because I am afraid as soon as I tell him, I will never hear from him again... I know, Better off..but still

Anyway, I am not sure a sinus infection could be prevented from doing the vest but anyhow... What do you guys take for your sinuses? I am on Biaxin. have you ever been on that?

My sinuses on catscan do not show any real damage, but I have sinus infections often..

As far as dating... Now I feel like a big liar....

Thanks for any advice

Jennifer

 

[JazzysMom]

OH Jenn...first I cant really help you with the sinus stuff. I only took one antibiotic for my sinuses which was Avelox (sp?). Gave me terrible headaches so I stopped. Since sinuses arent a big issue for me I dont have much to offer on that. Now onto the man topic. I vote to tell him. Of course its easy for me to say. First of all he is a doctor (of what I dont know) so chances of him catching onto things quicker are good. I dont think its fair to put him into a situation where he is going in blindly. People get divorced over things like that. Its a type of fraud. The old sayings hold true on this. If he wants to be with you (short term or long term) then he will accept it. If its not meant to be anything than telling him now or later wont make much difference except saving a bit of heartache! Good Luck!

 

[EnergyGal]

When I was a single chickadee I loved the personal adds and found this man who was older than me who was a doctor too. He was an Anesthesiologist at a hospital not to far from where I live. He was just getting divorced and had two children. We chatted on the phone and I decided to tell him in person about cf to give him the chance to meet me. I know he liked me from our conversation over dinner. I do not like coffee dates I just like the dinner date more intimate and you can get to know one another that way.

I remember telling him about my cf toward the end of the meal when he expressed that he wanted to get together with me. He just said that his dad had a lung disease and he had died etc...but that did not stop him from getting to know me. We dated for one year and then I got sick and went to chicago and we drifted off. I just felt he was too old and there were more issues that I was no longer interested in. He was a great contact for me for medical reasons so we stayed in touch but when I met my current husband I told him that I could not date him anymore. The point is you never know how someone is going to react. The more upfront you are with your self the more that others will trust you. My husband told me after I told him I had cf/transplant that I was very honest for being upfront. First off you have a very mild case, you are a nurse and you are an extremely likable kind and considerate person who has a lot going for you. Why in the world if this man likes you why would he not be interested? If he is really interested in children perhaps if you loved one another you would adopt? Give yourself a chance and of course you might not like him and visa versa but do not worry or put expectations that he might have for you. Just relax and if you feel that he is right for you and you want to go on more dates then tell him but do it like in a matter of fact way. Just wanted to mention to you that I have a very mild case of CF. I feel blessed to be so mild. I feel that you should know because you are a very kind man and this is something that I am very open about and feel anyone that I want to get to know needs to know this about me.

It will be a good experience.

I met another doctor once. His brother introduced me but did not tell me his brother was a doctor. On the date he said, there is something that you are not telling me about you. He played the game until I told him and then he told me that his brother told him etc...it was a lot of fun and it was a shame that he lived in another state. What a great guy. I had a fun two dates before he went back home. I learned a lot. His brother was so the opposite I was shocked. Gorgeous but that is not what I look for in a man anymore. I grew up. Looks are very unimportant to me. It is the character, the kindness and the warmth that I look for. A man can have no hair skiny but as long as he is sweet and loving that is all I need. Hey I hope my husband does not read this lol

 

[NoExcuses]

Sinus infections can't be prevented by the Vest, from any literature that I've found. You should feel guilty for not doing your meds (this is a sure fire way to get your lungs ill) but not your sinuses. What has dramatically reduced my sinus infections is treating my allergies.

1. Getting allergy tested (skin tested) thorougly - if done properly, the tests will take 5-6 hours each day for 2 days.

2. Getting allergy shots

3. Avoiding allergens (never open windows in your house. turn on the air for circulation)

4. HEPA air purifier for my living room where I do meds and my bedroom where I spend 1/3 of my day, every day

5. Allergy encasings for my matress if you are allergic to dust mites. Encasings for your pillows as well. Washing your bed sheets every 7 days

6. Wash your hair before bedtime (so you don't breath in pollen all night while sleeping)

7. Take an antihistamine (preferrably one that doesn't cross the blood brain barrier but is strong) daily

8. Internasal Steroid daily. EVERY day. Preferrably one that has no alcohol and is strong to decrease inflammation in your nasal passages and allow sinus fluid to drain (no draining = bacteria grows)

9. If your heart can tolerate it, take Sudafed (pseudephedrine, NOT sudafed PE) to help dilate your nasal passages and allow sinus fluid to drain



I haven't had a sinus in years because of my dilligence with my sinuses. <b>Healthy sinuses = healthy lungs </b>

 

[chantelfox]

Hey Jennifer,<br>
I have been in your shoes. I waited 4 months before I told my
current BF the truth. He knew something was up, but I insisted it
was "asthma". When I told him, I thought he was going to
leave me the very next day, like another guy I had dated did after
I told him a month into our relationship. I was so scared. But
he didn't  and to this day I ask him if he would have stayed
with me if I had been straight with him in the beginning and he
always says yes. Whether it is true or not, no one knows, because
he may feel that way now, but may have felt differently before
getting to know me those 4 months. I really think that it depends
on the person you're dating. I think that some people can handle it
and some can't. If they can't you don't want to waste you're time,
because it probably won't work out anyway.<br>
<br>
To this day I have guilt about waiting so long to tell my b/f. I
feel like I tricked him, but I wanted to be given a fair chance and
let him get to know <i>me</i> before he made the decision to stay
or go.He thinks I should have told him sooner, as well. I know that
may have been selfish and I wish I hadn't waited so long.<br>
<br>
I have the same feelings as you about not wanting to ruin someone
else's life. I feel guilty that I may not be there to see our kids
grow up. In the end I know what you're going through and if I were
to do it over, I would be up front, because essentially I WAS lying
to him the first 4 months. Like I said, I think that some people
can handle it and some can't. Better to not waste time with those
who can't and let people have a choice to stay or go. That way if
they stay you don't have to feel so guilt about "messing up
someone else's life with my your mess", because they CHOSE to
be with you.<br>
<br>
As for the sinuses, I rinse mine daily with "NeilMed Sinus
Rinse" daily in the morning. I have done this since my last
sinus surgery. They're little packets of stuff that you mix with
like 10 ounces of distilled water and squeeze up your nose. I
really start to notice when I have missed a few days. Take care!

 

[EnergyGal]

A thought just occurred<img src="i/expressions/light.gif" border="0"> if you wait too long it sounds like you are so afraid of your cf but if you are like "this is me take me or leave me" attitude that might show some more confidence in yourself. Many people have problems whether it is money, divorced, past abusive relationships etc... CF is something that is not your fault and is something to be proud of. You are a survivor and many men will be attracted to your strength.

 

[thelizardqueen]

Jenn, first of all I can't help you with the sinus thing - I don't really get those problems, so I have no advice to give. Secondly, you are not starting the relationship off as a lie. Every relationship I've been in, I have always ommitted the truth until I knew that we were going somewhere. Why tell someone when you really don't need to yet? You don't need the added stress. Trust your gut and instinct, and you will know when is the right time to tell the person you are seeing. I know many people have told me this, and at this moment its hard for me to believe, but I know it to be true - when the right guy comes along, things will all work out for you in the end, and you will wonder why you even worried that it wouldn't!

 

[coltsfan715]

Hey Jennifer

I agree with Amy about the allergies and sinus problems. I have been having a heck of a time with this lately. I have been taking ClaritinD to help with the congestion and sneezing.

As for the guy problems. I agree with everyone in that you need to tell him, though I get that you already know that from your post. I remember my first boyfriend in high school whom I never really told I had CF. His best friend was my best friend's twin ... so I thought he knew because we were always around each other and me taking meds and things. I told him when I was admitted to the hospital about 7-8 months into our relationship. We had a mutual break-up/fight lol a few months later and when we talked afterwards he simply told me that in future relationships I should be upfront about my having CF. He would have appreciated it. I can honestly say it was one of the intelligent pieces of advice he left me with and one piece of advice I HAVE listened too. Every guy I have dated I have told about my CF either before we went out or started dating (i.e. if we were kind of friends) or on the first date. I know alot of people have problems with guys sticking around, but I never had that issue really. I have seriously dated 4 guys and each of those relationships lasted over a year. Ultimately I was the one that ended the first 3 the 4th one I am still in - we are engaged. I ended them because I thought I needed too for my health and my needs, but that is a different story. I just say that because the longer you wait the more difficult it will probably be to tell him and the more likely he is probably going to be to have some problem - like one of those "why didn't you tell me?" "You lied to me" problems. I would hate to see that happen to you. Also he may very well surprise you by being open and welcoming to it all.

Best of luck with whatever you choose to do. Also I hope you start taking better care of yourself with your meds and therapies. Especially with being in the hospital working now I would hate to see you catch something while your defenses are somewhat down.

Take Care,
Lindsey

 

[HairGirl]

I would tell him, I hate telling people I have cf but if I started to date the guy I would wait just a few dates and then tell him, that way he saw that I'm able to do everything and that my cf was a part of me but not controlling me. When I was dating my husband and I told him I also gave him a book to read about cf, the next day he came over and cried because of what cf does to the body, he loved me more because of it! I didn't think I would ever get married because I couldn't have kids! But my husband is okay with that, he would rather adopt and have me for his wife than someone who could have kids. So don't let that stop you. Good luck with the sinuses, I have terrible ones too, but don't know what to do about it.

 

[NoExcuses]

<div class="FTQUOTE"><begin quote><i>Originally posted by: <b>coltsfan715</b></i>

I have been taking ClaritinD to help with the congestion and sneezing.

</end quote></div>


Sorry to hijack the thread but I can't let something like this go.

Please please please get a better anti-histamine than Claritin D.

Claritin is such an incredibly weak anti-histamine and for most people it doesn't work any better than taking a sugar pill.

Take Zyrtec or Allegra. Allegra preferrably because it does not cross the blood brain barrier. But both are head and shoulders more powerful than Claritin.

I just have the hardest time sitting by idling when someone is under-treating their sinuses. Especially someone who has CF where allergies can make a huge difference in lung function.

In terms of the D, I'm all for it. There is Zyrtec-D 12 hour and Allegra-D 12 hour and Allegra D 24 hour (depending on if you can sleep with sudafed in your body or not).

I hope your allergies get better soon with a MUCH better med, Lindsey. And if your insurance is giving you crap about not covering it, let me know. I know all the tricks in the book.

 

[coltsfan715]

Hey Amy thanks for the input, but I don't take anything regularly and I was told by my doc that was good for me to take as needed when I feel congested. It helps for me for now if I start having problems again then I will look into the other.

Like I said just listening to what doc reccomended and what I used to get from my old doc (in peds).

Lindsey

 

[Ratatosk]

Has anyone ever mentioned using Sinu-neb? It's a pari compressor, but a nebulizer attachment for your nose. I think I've also seen something similar on the european pari site. Get some saline or antibiotics up and into the sinus passages? I've mentioned it to my BIL who doesn't have CF, but has had numerous sinus problems, surgeries, etc. and he uses a hypertonic saline rinse on a daily basis.

 

[EnergyGal]

Hi Liza

Thank you so much for mentioning this to us. I never heard of this attachment before. Just did a search and found this
<a target=_blank class=ftalternatingbarlinklarge href="http://www.sinuneb.com/Physicians/physiciansguide.html
">http://www.sinuneb.com/Physicians/physiciansguide.html
</a>I am going to ask for a prescription. This is really going to help me big time. That is where I get my infections in my sinuses and being a transplant patient irrigation and getting the meds to be properly delivered are key.

YAY thank you again<img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-smile.gif" border="0">

 

[JazzysMom]

Someone (I believe HollyCatheryn) uses such an attachment. She has many sinuses problems!

 

[JennifersHope]

I have Sinu Neb.. I forgot all about it.. It is in my draw of meds...My ENT gave it to me a while ago. I used to inhale pulmozyme through it and it was amazing. I am going to use it.

 

[izemmom]

Sorry Jen - I have no advice to offer on either the sinus issue or the dating issue, but I just had to log on to say that ONLY on this site will you find a thread that combines the two topics. Thanks for the interesting juxtaposition, Jen! And, I do hope the sinus issue is getting better by now. My gut feeling is that honesty is the best policy, but I have to say that I'm not sure I'll tell Emily to be completly forthcoming when the day comes (Many, many MANY years in the future!) Good luck Sweetie! Thinking of you!

 

[EnergyGal]

I just called the company that makes Sinuneb and they no longer carry the product. Hold on tight to the ones you have.

 

[bmombtoo]

Jenn,<br>
I'm glad you had to log in to post on this topic......you can be
honest with us. The sinus infection will get better; I'm concerned
that you are barely taking your other meds. I'm new to all of this,
my son and I are maybe somethings, but I am not new to chronic
health problems. I have been an asthmatic for years and I know that
daily meds are the key to staying as healthy as possible, even if
that healthy is a cough or a runny nose. Caring about your health
is something you have to do for yourself, a boyfriend, a doctor,
not even a spouse can do that for you!!!!!!<br>
<br>
Now on to this honesty stuff in a dating relationship........you
don't spill your whole story on the first date. Sounds like you
guys have past that point. so if you really care about the
relationship and where it may go than you have to be honest. It
sounds like you have built up this whole scenario of him rejecting
you because of CF and kids, when you haven't even been proposed too
yet. Try living life one day at a time and live each day to its
fullest (and with meds).

 

[Ratatosk]

Might be an Ask Pari question.... I looked again at a European Pari Site -- Germany when Amy mentioned the Pari Boy yesterday and they had a Pari Sinus compressor and a pulsating nasal attachment to help with the "caves" -- sinuses ? <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-smile.gif" border="0">

 

[EnergyGal]

thank you it is ok. I will ask my doctor first and if she is its ok, I will just put the neb of my pari up to my nose and breathe. I sometimes do that when I take TOBI