Worriers

[CaliSally]

I know I'll tick some people off with this one, but it's something I think about when the occasion presents itself...

People who worry (a lot) - do they simply thrive on the drama, or are they truly scared this much, all the time?

I admit, I have a hard time dealing with over dramatical people (I find them very draining), yet, I want to be supportive - so how do I know the difference? How can I support them in the meantime without being too critical.

I AM a caring person, but I guess I don't have the patience to deal with daily drama. Life isn't THAT much of a rollercoaster....

...Like to hear your thoughts... (and I"m sure one of you will "judge" me publically...that's your right, and oh well...)

 

[CaliSally]

I know I'll tick some people off with this one, but it's something I think about when the occasion presents itself...

People who worry (a lot) - do they simply thrive on the drama, or are they truly scared this much, all the time?

I admit, I have a hard time dealing with over dramatical people (I find them very draining), yet, I want to be supportive - so how do I know the difference? How can I support them in the meantime without being too critical.

I AM a caring person, but I guess I don't have the patience to deal with daily drama. Life isn't THAT much of a rollercoaster....

...Like to hear your thoughts... (and I"m sure one of you will "judge" me publically...that's your right, and oh well...)

 

[CaliSally]

I know I'll tick some people off with this one, but it's something I think about when the occasion presents itself...

People who worry (a lot) - do they simply thrive on the drama, or are they truly scared this much, all the time?

I admit, I have a hard time dealing with over dramatical people (I find them very draining), yet, I want to be supportive - so how do I know the difference? How can I support them in the meantime without being too critical.

I AM a caring person, but I guess I don't have the patience to deal with daily drama. Life isn't THAT much of a rollercoaster....

...Like to hear your thoughts... (and I"m sure one of you will "judge" me publically...that's your right, and oh well...)

 

[Ratatosk]

I agree. I've been in a few situations where I feel as if the life is being SUCKED out of me. Whether it's friends, coworkers or family. It is draining! I guess I give most people the benefit of the doubt, try to be supportive, but at some point -- if it becomes a constant, I'll start to distance myself.

'Cuz otherwise, I want to just yell and tell them what I really, really think... I'm But mainly, I just try to be supportive and not let myself get into a conversation with all the gorey details. And I am a chronic worrier, so being around people that have such overwhelming, all encompassing drama in my life reminds to calm down and not to sweat the small stuff.

There are people who have geniune bad luck and I feel, so very bad for them -- example would be a friend of the family who has gone thru so much heartache over the past year -- mother passed away, then her son and then she was diagnosed with cancer & didn't have disability insurance.

 

[Ratatosk]

I agree. I've been in a few situations where I feel as if the life is being SUCKED out of me. Whether it's friends, coworkers or family. It is draining! I guess I give most people the benefit of the doubt, try to be supportive, but at some point -- if it becomes a constant, I'll start to distance myself.

'Cuz otherwise, I want to just yell and tell them what I really, really think... I'm But mainly, I just try to be supportive and not let myself get into a conversation with all the gorey details. And I am a chronic worrier, so being around people that have such overwhelming, all encompassing drama in my life reminds to calm down and not to sweat the small stuff.

There are people who have geniune bad luck and I feel, so very bad for them -- example would be a friend of the family who has gone thru so much heartache over the past year -- mother passed away, then her son and then she was diagnosed with cancer & didn't have disability insurance.

 

[Ratatosk]

I agree. I've been in a few situations where I feel as if the life is being SUCKED out of me. Whether it's friends, coworkers or family. It is draining! I guess I give most people the benefit of the doubt, try to be supportive, but at some point -- if it becomes a constant, I'll start to distance myself.

'Cuz otherwise, I want to just yell and tell them what I really, really think... I'm But mainly, I just try to be supportive and not let myself get into a conversation with all the gorey details. And I am a chronic worrier, so being around people that have such overwhelming, all encompassing drama in my life reminds to calm down and not to sweat the small stuff.

There are people who have geniune bad luck and I feel, so very bad for them -- example would be a friend of the family who has gone thru so much heartache over the past year -- mother passed away, then her son and then she was diagnosed with cancer & didn't have disability insurance.

 

[JazzysMom]

Its ironic that you bring this up. I am having issues with my neighbor over just this thing. The problem is that I have turned my emotions off on his "situation" and dont get sucked into the drama like I did when we first met. Today the boil that has been festering ruptured and now Jazmine is out of 2 close friendships with his kids (by his choice not mine). I explained to Jazmine that some people (myself included at times) cant seperate their emotions/feelings of an issue with the true facts and that causes choas. It is draining. Some days I handle it better then others. Some days I care and frankly....some days I dont give a crap. My husband & I agree that bring "outside" garbage into our home life would cause a problem in our marriage. So we limit that by limiting our exposure to people who seem to "thrive" on the constant drama. Yes there are people with bad luck. Yes there are people who just have problems handlings things, but when it becomes everything, everyday......its time to open your eyes!

 

[JazzysMom]

Its ironic that you bring this up. I am having issues with my neighbor over just this thing. The problem is that I have turned my emotions off on his "situation" and dont get sucked into the drama like I did when we first met. Today the boil that has been festering ruptured and now Jazmine is out of 2 close friendships with his kids (by his choice not mine). I explained to Jazmine that some people (myself included at times) cant seperate their emotions/feelings of an issue with the true facts and that causes choas. It is draining. Some days I handle it better then others. Some days I care and frankly....some days I dont give a crap. My husband & I agree that bring "outside" garbage into our home life would cause a problem in our marriage. So we limit that by limiting our exposure to people who seem to "thrive" on the constant drama. Yes there are people with bad luck. Yes there are people who just have problems handlings things, but when it becomes everything, everyday......its time to open your eyes!

 

[JazzysMom]

Its ironic that you bring this up. I am having issues with my neighbor over just this thing. The problem is that I have turned my emotions off on his "situation" and dont get sucked into the drama like I did when we first met. Today the boil that has been festering ruptured and now Jazmine is out of 2 close friendships with his kids (by his choice not mine). I explained to Jazmine that some people (myself included at times) cant seperate their emotions/feelings of an issue with the true facts and that causes choas. It is draining. Some days I handle it better then others. Some days I care and frankly....some days I dont give a crap. My husband & I agree that bring "outside" garbage into our home life would cause a problem in our marriage. So we limit that by limiting our exposure to people who seem to "thrive" on the constant drama. Yes there are people with bad luck. Yes there are people who just have problems handlings things, but when it becomes everything, everyday......its time to open your eyes!

 

[EnergyGal]

Hello Sally

Very interesting post that you are presenting. I think it all depends on the level of your friendship and where you are with your own life at the time. I am also wondering if you are directing your question about this forum or about life in general.

If I feel extremely healthy emotionally and physcially at the time when the drama hits, I can deal with it by being a good listerner and showing support. I have found that some people no matter what advice you give them, will not listen. They want to vent and drain themselves of their own life force.

I am able to block their negative energy with certain grounding techniques. It is not their fault that they think with a negative outlook. I believe the way others view their life have been a long process that they learned over time. I have one friend who is always criticizing her mother and in reality she is just like her mother.

Some people are never happy no matter what they have in life. They will always find something to pick on with themselves or with others. These people are obviously not healthy in all aspects.

The best thing that I do is to keep my distance when they strike. I listen and sometimes I do not offer any advice. Just being a sounding board.

When the phone rings, I look at the caller ID and decide if it is worth listening to these people yap away.

If you are referring to this website, there are many people who love the drama and want to start trouble just so they can stand out. I found the best thing to do is skim over posts quickly. I only allow myself so much time going through them and will comment when I feel the person is genunine and will be receptive to my suggestions.

Staying online too much without becoming involved with the drama is draining too. The electro magnetic fields that are present around us from the computer can zap our health. Just add in some EMF's and some Attention Seekers and you have a Wonderful Side show.


edited to add: I practice zipping up my central meridian, every time I see the person who is draining on the caller id. Whether I decide to answer the phone, the thought of this person is draining. Zipping up is a wonderful exercise and takes twenty seconds. Start at the pubic bone and head straight up to the bottom lip. Practice this three times. Donna Eden's energy medicine book. It is part of the daily routine.
Great post Sally
Risa

 

[EnergyGal]

Hello Sally

Very interesting post that you are presenting. I think it all depends on the level of your friendship and where you are with your own life at the time. I am also wondering if you are directing your question about this forum or about life in general.

If I feel extremely healthy emotionally and physcially at the time when the drama hits, I can deal with it by being a good listerner and showing support. I have found that some people no matter what advice you give them, will not listen. They want to vent and drain themselves of their own life force.

I am able to block their negative energy with certain grounding techniques. It is not their fault that they think with a negative outlook. I believe the way others view their life have been a long process that they learned over time. I have one friend who is always criticizing her mother and in reality she is just like her mother.

Some people are never happy no matter what they have in life. They will always find something to pick on with themselves or with others. These people are obviously not healthy in all aspects.

The best thing that I do is to keep my distance when they strike. I listen and sometimes I do not offer any advice. Just being a sounding board.

When the phone rings, I look at the caller ID and decide if it is worth listening to these people yap away.

If you are referring to this website, there are many people who love the drama and want to start trouble just so they can stand out. I found the best thing to do is skim over posts quickly. I only allow myself so much time going through them and will comment when I feel the person is genunine and will be receptive to my suggestions.

Staying online too much without becoming involved with the drama is draining too. The electro magnetic fields that are present around us from the computer can zap our health. Just add in some EMF's and some Attention Seekers and you have a Wonderful Side show.


edited to add: I practice zipping up my central meridian, every time I see the person who is draining on the caller id. Whether I decide to answer the phone, the thought of this person is draining. Zipping up is a wonderful exercise and takes twenty seconds. Start at the pubic bone and head straight up to the bottom lip. Practice this three times. Donna Eden's energy medicine book. It is part of the daily routine.
Great post Sally
Risa

 

[EnergyGal]

Hello Sally

Very interesting post that you are presenting. I think it all depends on the level of your friendship and where you are with your own life at the time. I am also wondering if you are directing your question about this forum or about life in general.

If I feel extremely healthy emotionally and physcially at the time when the drama hits, I can deal with it by being a good listerner and showing support. I have found that some people no matter what advice you give them, will not listen. They want to vent and drain themselves of their own life force.

I am able to block their negative energy with certain grounding techniques. It is not their fault that they think with a negative outlook. I believe the way others view their life have been a long process that they learned over time. I have one friend who is always criticizing her mother and in reality she is just like her mother.

Some people are never happy no matter what they have in life. They will always find something to pick on with themselves or with others. These people are obviously not healthy in all aspects.

The best thing that I do is to keep my distance when they strike. I listen and sometimes I do not offer any advice. Just being a sounding board.

When the phone rings, I look at the caller ID and decide if it is worth listening to these people yap away.

If you are referring to this website, there are many people who love the drama and want to start trouble just so they can stand out. I found the best thing to do is skim over posts quickly. I only allow myself so much time going through them and will comment when I feel the person is genunine and will be receptive to my suggestions.

Staying online too much without becoming involved with the drama is draining too. The electro magnetic fields that are present around us from the computer can zap our health. Just add in some EMF's and some Attention Seekers and you have a Wonderful Side show.


edited to add: I practice zipping up my central meridian, every time I see the person who is draining on the caller id. Whether I decide to answer the phone, the thought of this person is draining. Zipping up is a wonderful exercise and takes twenty seconds. Start at the pubic bone and head straight up to the bottom lip. Practice this three times. Donna Eden's energy medicine book. It is part of the daily routine.
Great post Sally
Risa

 

[CaliSally]

Risa,
I'm thinking of no one in particular as I pose the question - it applies to both: in general and on the boards, I've had experience with both. My sister is this way, and as was an old friend.

These two in particular were needy people. I was always there for them. The friend was truly a manic depressive, either extremely up, or extremely down. My sister turned everything into a drama. I excused it for a long time knowing she had true panic disorder.

I had to start using the caller ID on them both - and in turn, they both got pissed off because I wasn't answering their calls when they thought I should.

I excused them both, feeling for their true disorders. But yet at the same time, my health wasn't that great, and I just felt like I didn't have the mental energy to deal with them anymore. (by the way, I was highly anemic getting iron infusions)

My friend moved 3 hours away, but expected me to come see her and drag my sick cat with me, but would never come see me. My sister expected me to come to her aid after her gall bladder surgery, even though I was only about a week out from my hysterectomy.

Well, my sister quit talking to me over this incident. That was about 2 years ago. All I can say is "oh well" I know what I did wasn't selfish, even though SHE thinks so.

....

 

[CaliSally]

Risa,
I'm thinking of no one in particular as I pose the question - it applies to both: in general and on the boards, I've had experience with both. My sister is this way, and as was an old friend.

These two in particular were needy people. I was always there for them. The friend was truly a manic depressive, either extremely up, or extremely down. My sister turned everything into a drama. I excused it for a long time knowing she had true panic disorder.

I had to start using the caller ID on them both - and in turn, they both got pissed off because I wasn't answering their calls when they thought I should.

I excused them both, feeling for their true disorders. But yet at the same time, my health wasn't that great, and I just felt like I didn't have the mental energy to deal with them anymore. (by the way, I was highly anemic getting iron infusions)

My friend moved 3 hours away, but expected me to come see her and drag my sick cat with me, but would never come see me. My sister expected me to come to her aid after her gall bladder surgery, even though I was only about a week out from my hysterectomy.

Well, my sister quit talking to me over this incident. That was about 2 years ago. All I can say is "oh well" I know what I did wasn't selfish, even though SHE thinks so.

....

 

[CaliSally]

Risa,
I'm thinking of no one in particular as I pose the question - it applies to both: in general and on the boards, I've had experience with both. My sister is this way, and as was an old friend.

These two in particular were needy people. I was always there for them. The friend was truly a manic depressive, either extremely up, or extremely down. My sister turned everything into a drama. I excused it for a long time knowing she had true panic disorder.

I had to start using the caller ID on them both - and in turn, they both got pissed off because I wasn't answering their calls when they thought I should.

I excused them both, feeling for their true disorders. But yet at the same time, my health wasn't that great, and I just felt like I didn't have the mental energy to deal with them anymore. (by the way, I was highly anemic getting iron infusions)

My friend moved 3 hours away, but expected me to come see her and drag my sick cat with me, but would never come see me. My sister expected me to come to her aid after her gall bladder surgery, even though I was only about a week out from my hysterectomy.

Well, my sister quit talking to me over this incident. That was about 2 years ago. All I can say is "oh well" I know what I did wasn't selfish, even though SHE thinks so.

....

 

[EnergyGal]

Hi Sally

I would have done the same with the phone calls and stopped contact. People are self absorbed and extremely needy. If they really need help, in some way they need to reciprocate.

Just say no. It is so easy but for some reason people cannot do it.

I am glad that you are able to take care of yourself in a healthy way now.

Many people are born "Takers" and they never learned how to give. People will treat you as you want to be treated.

Take care

 

[EnergyGal]

Hi Sally

I would have done the same with the phone calls and stopped contact. People are self absorbed and extremely needy. If they really need help, in some way they need to reciprocate.

Just say no. It is so easy but for some reason people cannot do it.

I am glad that you are able to take care of yourself in a healthy way now.

Many people are born "Takers" and they never learned how to give. People will treat you as you want to be treated.

Take care

 

[EnergyGal]

Hi Sally

I would have done the same with the phone calls and stopped contact. People are self absorbed and extremely needy. If they really need help, in some way they need to reciprocate.

Just say no. It is so easy but for some reason people cannot do it.

I am glad that you are able to take care of yourself in a healthy way now.

Many people are born "Takers" and they never learned how to give. People will treat you as you want to be treated.

Take care

 

[Ratatosk]

I tend to use the caller ID, too. In fact, the reason we got it was because of a neighbor, who was always calling, always stopping by, wearing out his welcome -- grumbling about his next door neighbors, things going on around town... I feel bad, because I know he's lonely, but if he sets foot in our door -- he won't leave for hours. And I'm terrible about getting someone off the phone -- he knows we're home for the evening, so it's not like I can say we're heading out.

We also have family members who can be a trial. One suffers from severe depression and speaks in a slow drawn out monotone with lot of sighing. And life revolves around going to doctors appointment and other family members none of us have heard from or about in years. Another group we call "the show". They show up for holidays, weekends and everything is a production, full of drama and bravado. In both cases, if you dare mention your busy schedule, anything health related -- they have stories a zillion times worse with lots of gory details.

 

[Ratatosk]

I tend to use the caller ID, too. In fact, the reason we got it was because of a neighbor, who was always calling, always stopping by, wearing out his welcome -- grumbling about his next door neighbors, things going on around town... I feel bad, because I know he's lonely, but if he sets foot in our door -- he won't leave for hours. And I'm terrible about getting someone off the phone -- he knows we're home for the evening, so it's not like I can say we're heading out.

We also have family members who can be a trial. One suffers from severe depression and speaks in a slow drawn out monotone with lot of sighing. And life revolves around going to doctors appointment and other family members none of us have heard from or about in years. Another group we call "the show". They show up for holidays, weekends and everything is a production, full of drama and bravado. In both cases, if you dare mention your busy schedule, anything health related -- they have stories a zillion times worse with lots of gory details.