It sounds as though you already know what you need to do. You really do need to tell her about the infertility factor. As difficult as it is for you to share, it's not fair of you to knowingly keep that from her.
I remember when we foung out about my husband. I won't lie, I was devistated, heartbroken. Of all the things, now this is added to "his/our" pile, as if CF by itself isn't enough, now this is another CF factor... It just isn't fair. But I would never leave him because of that. As someone else put, where there is a will there is a way. It may not happen as soon as you want, but you can make kids a part of your life someday.
Ultimately it will be her choice to stay or go, but don't ever feel that you are keeping her from a man "who can give her what she wanted" (in your words). It's her choice and if she stays, it's because she WANTS to be there. This is something that I know my husband struggles with. But the point that I have to drive into his head is that I want to be with him. And if I didn't, I would leave. But I WANT to be with him. And I can guarantee you that if this woman really loves you, she will WANT to be with you regardless as well. It doesn't mean the truth about the infertility won't hurt and be hard for her, but if she's there for the right reasons now, she'll stay.
Guide her to this site too. There are many wives/partners here who can help her and support her and give her advice. We are all here going through many of the same things all together.
As far as your questios about IVF not working. If it is a male factor infertility ONLY issue, then the success rate is high for a pregnancy. If you look at most of the statistics provided on infertility related websites and or Dr.s offices who provide their success rates, 99% of those are from female factor infertilty. And female factor infertility is a LOT more complicated than CF male factor infertilty. There are so many variables and unknowns with most female infertility. With male factor infertility, there is a clear and concise reason.
Of the 4 families I know personally who've done IVF for male factor infertility, only 1 familiy had to do a frozen embryo transfer after the first "fresh" cycle didn't work, the frozen cycle did. They went on to do another fresh cycle that didn't work either, and did another frozen cycle that DID work. So 2 failed fresh cycles and 2 successful frozen cycles. More than likely that had to do with HER body.
if you have any specific IVF questions that you can think of now, I'm happy to anser them.
I remember when we foung out about my husband. I won't lie, I was devistated, heartbroken. Of all the things, now this is added to "his/our" pile, as if CF by itself isn't enough, now this is another CF factor... It just isn't fair. But I would never leave him because of that. As someone else put, where there is a will there is a way. It may not happen as soon as you want, but you can make kids a part of your life someday.
Ultimately it will be her choice to stay or go, but don't ever feel that you are keeping her from a man "who can give her what she wanted" (in your words). It's her choice and if she stays, it's because she WANTS to be there. This is something that I know my husband struggles with. But the point that I have to drive into his head is that I want to be with him. And if I didn't, I would leave. But I WANT to be with him. And I can guarantee you that if this woman really loves you, she will WANT to be with you regardless as well. It doesn't mean the truth about the infertility won't hurt and be hard for her, but if she's there for the right reasons now, she'll stay.
Guide her to this site too. There are many wives/partners here who can help her and support her and give her advice. We are all here going through many of the same things all together.
As far as your questios about IVF not working. If it is a male factor infertility ONLY issue, then the success rate is high for a pregnancy. If you look at most of the statistics provided on infertility related websites and or Dr.s offices who provide their success rates, 99% of those are from female factor infertilty. And female factor infertility is a LOT more complicated than CF male factor infertilty. There are so many variables and unknowns with most female infertility. With male factor infertility, there is a clear and concise reason.
Of the 4 families I know personally who've done IVF for male factor infertility, only 1 familiy had to do a frozen embryo transfer after the first "fresh" cycle didn't work, the frozen cycle did. They went on to do another fresh cycle that didn't work either, and did another frozen cycle that DID work. So 2 failed fresh cycles and 2 successful frozen cycles. More than likely that had to do with HER body.
if you have any specific IVF questions that you can think of now, I'm happy to anser them.