appreciating without worrying-help!

missnth

New member
i am stuck in a situation that i am hoping someone here can help me with. i have a toddler with cf and i love her tremendously. because of her cf i have an extra level of worry for her and sadness that i may not always have her in my life. this worry and sadness enables me to appreciate her all the time and it really keeps me in check even when parenting is hard or i am tired or i am busy. but my problem is because the source of my intense and constant appreciation for her is from worry and sadness of feeling a level of loss for her when i didn't even lose her, i can't keep the sadness from being very close the surface. so the moment any small thing goes wrong or if i see other young children being happy with their families (i transfer myself into their happiness) or if i hear terrible news about children or ppl with cf, i just get so so sad. and i feel in the blink of an eye i can go from happy in my wonderful life with her to it falling apart when i think of her possible suffering or losing her because i just love her so much. i want to be able to fully enjoy her without the sadness so close by especially when she has a good chance of being healthy with all the treatments she can have. any suggestions?
 

missnth

New member
i am stuck in a situation that i am hoping someone here can help me with. i have a toddler with cf and i love her tremendously. because of her cf i have an extra level of worry for her and sadness that i may not always have her in my life. this worry and sadness enables me to appreciate her all the time and it really keeps me in check even when parenting is hard or i am tired or i am busy. but my problem is because the source of my intense and constant appreciation for her is from worry and sadness of feeling a level of loss for her when i didn't even lose her, i can't keep the sadness from being very close the surface. so the moment any small thing goes wrong or if i see other young children being happy with their families (i transfer myself into their happiness) or if i hear terrible news about children or ppl with cf, i just get so so sad. and i feel in the blink of an eye i can go from happy in my wonderful life with her to it falling apart when i think of her possible suffering or losing her because i just love her so much. i want to be able to fully enjoy her without the sadness so close by especially when she has a good chance of being healthy with all the treatments she can have. any suggestions?
 

missnth

New member
i am stuck in a situation that i am hoping someone here can help me with. i have a toddler with cf and i love her tremendously. because of her cf i have an extra level of worry for her and sadness that i may not always have her in my life. this worry and sadness enables me to appreciate her all the time and it really keeps me in check even when parenting is hard or i am tired or i am busy. but my problem is because the source of my intense and constant appreciation for her is from worry and sadness of feeling a level of loss for her when i didn't even lose her, i can't keep the sadness from being very close the surface. so the moment any small thing goes wrong or if i see other young children being happy with their families (i transfer myself into their happiness) or if i hear terrible news about children or ppl with cf, i just get so so sad. and i feel in the blink of an eye i can go from happy in my wonderful life with her to it falling apart when i think of her possible suffering or losing her because i just love her so much. i want to be able to fully enjoy her without the sadness so close by especially when she has a good chance of being healthy with all the treatments she can have. any suggestions?
 

missnth

New member
i am stuck in a situation that i am hoping someone here can help me with. i have a toddler with cf and i love her tremendously. because of her cf i have an extra level of worry for her and sadness that i may not always have her in my life. this worry and sadness enables me to appreciate her all the time and it really keeps me in check even when parenting is hard or i am tired or i am busy. but my problem is because the source of my intense and constant appreciation for her is from worry and sadness of feeling a level of loss for her when i didn't even lose her, i can't keep the sadness from being very close the surface. so the moment any small thing goes wrong or if i see other young children being happy with their families (i transfer myself into their happiness) or if i hear terrible news about children or ppl with cf, i just get so so sad. and i feel in the blink of an eye i can go from happy in my wonderful life with her to it falling apart when i think of her possible suffering or losing her because i just love her so much. i want to be able to fully enjoy her without the sadness so close by especially when she has a good chance of being healthy with all the treatments she can have. any suggestions?
 

missnth

New member
i am stuck in a situation that i am hoping someone here can help me with. i have a toddler with cf and i love her tremendously. because of her cf i have an extra level of worry for her and sadness that i may not always have her in my life. this worry and sadness enables me to appreciate her all the time and it really keeps me in check even when parenting is hard or i am tired or i am busy. but my problem is because the source of my intense and constant appreciation for her is from worry and sadness of feeling a level of loss for her when i didn't even lose her, i can't keep the sadness from being very close the surface. so the moment any small thing goes wrong or if i see other young children being happy with their families (i transfer myself into their happiness) or if i hear terrible news about children or ppl with cf, i just get so so sad. and i feel in the blink of an eye i can go from happy in my wonderful life with her to it falling apart when i think of her possible suffering or losing her because i just love her so much. i want to be able to fully enjoy her without the sadness so close by especially when she has a good chance of being healthy with all the treatments she can have. any suggestions?
 

PlumPerfect

New member
my first suggestion would be to talk to your social worker in your cf clinic, they can get you more specific help.

This is how I look at it. yes it is disheartening to know that you have a child with those risks, but just because of that does not mean its a death sentence and you should try to never focus on that fact.. when I was 15v me brother who was 17 died without haveing and illness but just an unexpected tragady. why I am bringing this up is children die every day, sad but true and not because they have cf. On top of that the medical industry is only getting better at treating this and are close to a cure.

Every child is special no matter there needs and with cf we just are aware of the fact our child is at risk, but really so is every other child wether it be a drunk driver, a drowning, sids, a school turning into columbine, and so on, my point is in some form every parent is worried about the things that can affect their children. with knowing what their needs are we just have to take care of them love them and protect them from what may harm them.. Just know you can only do that so far.. God takes them when its time and there is no stopping that. Wether I get 1 day or a life time with both my children I am happy that I got to love them. Yes I pray for the most time, but that is human.

I think you need to just relax and enjoy your time because you would only be mad at yourself that you focused on the negative when it was time to focus on the positive... Plus you can put that negitive energy onto your child and that just stresses them out more.

Hope this has helped
 

PlumPerfect

New member
my first suggestion would be to talk to your social worker in your cf clinic, they can get you more specific help.

This is how I look at it. yes it is disheartening to know that you have a child with those risks, but just because of that does not mean its a death sentence and you should try to never focus on that fact.. when I was 15v me brother who was 17 died without haveing and illness but just an unexpected tragady. why I am bringing this up is children die every day, sad but true and not because they have cf. On top of that the medical industry is only getting better at treating this and are close to a cure.

Every child is special no matter there needs and with cf we just are aware of the fact our child is at risk, but really so is every other child wether it be a drunk driver, a drowning, sids, a school turning into columbine, and so on, my point is in some form every parent is worried about the things that can affect their children. with knowing what their needs are we just have to take care of them love them and protect them from what may harm them.. Just know you can only do that so far.. God takes them when its time and there is no stopping that. Wether I get 1 day or a life time with both my children I am happy that I got to love them. Yes I pray for the most time, but that is human.

I think you need to just relax and enjoy your time because you would only be mad at yourself that you focused on the negative when it was time to focus on the positive... Plus you can put that negitive energy onto your child and that just stresses them out more.

Hope this has helped
 

PlumPerfect

New member
my first suggestion would be to talk to your social worker in your cf clinic, they can get you more specific help.

This is how I look at it. yes it is disheartening to know that you have a child with those risks, but just because of that does not mean its a death sentence and you should try to never focus on that fact.. when I was 15v me brother who was 17 died without haveing and illness but just an unexpected tragady. why I am bringing this up is children die every day, sad but true and not because they have cf. On top of that the medical industry is only getting better at treating this and are close to a cure.

Every child is special no matter there needs and with cf we just are aware of the fact our child is at risk, but really so is every other child wether it be a drunk driver, a drowning, sids, a school turning into columbine, and so on, my point is in some form every parent is worried about the things that can affect their children. with knowing what their needs are we just have to take care of them love them and protect them from what may harm them.. Just know you can only do that so far.. God takes them when its time and there is no stopping that. Wether I get 1 day or a life time with both my children I am happy that I got to love them. Yes I pray for the most time, but that is human.

I think you need to just relax and enjoy your time because you would only be mad at yourself that you focused on the negative when it was time to focus on the positive... Plus you can put that negitive energy onto your child and that just stresses them out more.

Hope this has helped
 

PlumPerfect

New member
my first suggestion would be to talk to your social worker in your cf clinic, they can get you more specific help.

This is how I look at it. yes it is disheartening to know that you have a child with those risks, but just because of that does not mean its a death sentence and you should try to never focus on that fact.. when I was 15v me brother who was 17 died without haveing and illness but just an unexpected tragady. why I am bringing this up is children die every day, sad but true and not because they have cf. On top of that the medical industry is only getting better at treating this and are close to a cure.

Every child is special no matter there needs and with cf we just are aware of the fact our child is at risk, but really so is every other child wether it be a drunk driver, a drowning, sids, a school turning into columbine, and so on, my point is in some form every parent is worried about the things that can affect their children. with knowing what their needs are we just have to take care of them love them and protect them from what may harm them.. Just know you can only do that so far.. God takes them when its time and there is no stopping that. Wether I get 1 day or a life time with both my children I am happy that I got to love them. Yes I pray for the most time, but that is human.

I think you need to just relax and enjoy your time because you would only be mad at yourself that you focused on the negative when it was time to focus on the positive... Plus you can put that negitive energy onto your child and that just stresses them out more.

Hope this has helped
 

PlumPerfect

New member
my first suggestion would be to talk to your social worker in your cf clinic, they can get you more specific help.
<br />
<br />This is how I look at it. yes it is disheartening to know that you have a child with those risks, but just because of that does not mean its a death sentence and you should try to never focus on that fact.. when I was 15v me brother who was 17 died without haveing and illness but just an unexpected tragady. why I am bringing this up is children die every day, sad but true and not because they have cf. On top of that the medical industry is only getting better at treating this and are close to a cure.
<br />
<br />Every child is special no matter there needs and with cf we just are aware of the fact our child is at risk, but really so is every other child wether it be a drunk driver, a drowning, sids, a school turning into columbine, and so on, my point is in some form every parent is worried about the things that can affect their children. with knowing what their needs are we just have to take care of them love them and protect them from what may harm them.. Just know you can only do that so far.. God takes them when its time and there is no stopping that. Wether I get 1 day or a life time with both my children I am happy that I got to love them. Yes I pray for the most time, but that is human.
<br />
<br />I think you need to just relax and enjoy your time because you would only be mad at yourself that you focused on the negative when it was time to focus on the positive... Plus you can put that negitive energy onto your child and that just stresses them out more.
<br />
<br />Hope this has helped
 
C

Cherylwithone

Guest
This will eat you up if you let it. Like PLumPerfect said talk to the cf social worker, that is what they are there for. I feel like Iam truely blessed to have my daughter come into my life. Even though she has cf and sees 8 different doctors because of the other stuff I would not change anything. She is who she is and I love the person that she is and has come to be. She does not take life for granted. I have learned so much from her. Please enjoy your child. You can't worry about what you can't change nor will the worrying help you or her. Just love her and do what the doctors say to do. I believe in the power of love and prayer. We have all walked in your shoes at one time of another. Don't feel your alone here.

Cheryl mom to Malora 15 w/cf
 
C

Cherylwithone

Guest
This will eat you up if you let it. Like PLumPerfect said talk to the cf social worker, that is what they are there for. I feel like Iam truely blessed to have my daughter come into my life. Even though she has cf and sees 8 different doctors because of the other stuff I would not change anything. She is who she is and I love the person that she is and has come to be. She does not take life for granted. I have learned so much from her. Please enjoy your child. You can't worry about what you can't change nor will the worrying help you or her. Just love her and do what the doctors say to do. I believe in the power of love and prayer. We have all walked in your shoes at one time of another. Don't feel your alone here.

Cheryl mom to Malora 15 w/cf
 
C

Cherylwithone

Guest
This will eat you up if you let it. Like PLumPerfect said talk to the cf social worker, that is what they are there for. I feel like Iam truely blessed to have my daughter come into my life. Even though she has cf and sees 8 different doctors because of the other stuff I would not change anything. She is who she is and I love the person that she is and has come to be. She does not take life for granted. I have learned so much from her. Please enjoy your child. You can't worry about what you can't change nor will the worrying help you or her. Just love her and do what the doctors say to do. I believe in the power of love and prayer. We have all walked in your shoes at one time of another. Don't feel your alone here.

Cheryl mom to Malora 15 w/cf
 
C

Cherylwithone

Guest
This will eat you up if you let it. Like PLumPerfect said talk to the cf social worker, that is what they are there for. I feel like Iam truely blessed to have my daughter come into my life. Even though she has cf and sees 8 different doctors because of the other stuff I would not change anything. She is who she is and I love the person that she is and has come to be. She does not take life for granted. I have learned so much from her. Please enjoy your child. You can't worry about what you can't change nor will the worrying help you or her. Just love her and do what the doctors say to do. I believe in the power of love and prayer. We have all walked in your shoes at one time of another. Don't feel your alone here.

Cheryl mom to Malora 15 w/cf
 
C

Cherylwithone

Guest
This will eat you up if you let it. Like PLumPerfect said talk to the cf social worker, that is what they are there for. I feel like Iam truely blessed to have my daughter come into my life. Even though she has cf and sees 8 different doctors because of the other stuff I would not change anything. She is who she is and I love the person that she is and has come to be. She does not take life for granted. I have learned so much from her. Please enjoy your child. You can't worry about what you can't change nor will the worrying help you or her. Just love her and do what the doctors say to do. I believe in the power of love and prayer. We have all walked in your shoes at one time of another. Don't feel your alone here.
<br />
<br />Cheryl mom to Malora 15 w/cf
 

missnth

New member
thanks for your responses. my problem is that while logically i know what you are saying, emotionally i just can't control it. when i get an emotional trigger, which can happen at any time, i have to hold back tears while i am in the grocery or in my car. i am just so caught up in it. and the thing is that i don't focus on the negative, but i feel the negative. i enjoy all my time with her, but then when i have to take her in for an issue she may have, i emotionally fast forward to panic and a feeling of losing her even though it usually ends up as a virus that passes. and if i see sweet things that other children do i just get all emotional because it makes me think of how much i love my daughter and want to be with her forever. i guess it ties to a reality that everyone dies, but with her i just feel it so strongly. and it's hard to subdue these feelings when i give her treatments every day and it keeps me so much in the reality of how responsible i feel to keep her alive and well.
 

missnth

New member
thanks for your responses. my problem is that while logically i know what you are saying, emotionally i just can't control it. when i get an emotional trigger, which can happen at any time, i have to hold back tears while i am in the grocery or in my car. i am just so caught up in it. and the thing is that i don't focus on the negative, but i feel the negative. i enjoy all my time with her, but then when i have to take her in for an issue she may have, i emotionally fast forward to panic and a feeling of losing her even though it usually ends up as a virus that passes. and if i see sweet things that other children do i just get all emotional because it makes me think of how much i love my daughter and want to be with her forever. i guess it ties to a reality that everyone dies, but with her i just feel it so strongly. and it's hard to subdue these feelings when i give her treatments every day and it keeps me so much in the reality of how responsible i feel to keep her alive and well.
 

missnth

New member
thanks for your responses. my problem is that while logically i know what you are saying, emotionally i just can't control it. when i get an emotional trigger, which can happen at any time, i have to hold back tears while i am in the grocery or in my car. i am just so caught up in it. and the thing is that i don't focus on the negative, but i feel the negative. i enjoy all my time with her, but then when i have to take her in for an issue she may have, i emotionally fast forward to panic and a feeling of losing her even though it usually ends up as a virus that passes. and if i see sweet things that other children do i just get all emotional because it makes me think of how much i love my daughter and want to be with her forever. i guess it ties to a reality that everyone dies, but with her i just feel it so strongly. and it's hard to subdue these feelings when i give her treatments every day and it keeps me so much in the reality of how responsible i feel to keep her alive and well.
 

missnth

New member
thanks for your responses. my problem is that while logically i know what you are saying, emotionally i just can't control it. when i get an emotional trigger, which can happen at any time, i have to hold back tears while i am in the grocery or in my car. i am just so caught up in it. and the thing is that i don't focus on the negative, but i feel the negative. i enjoy all my time with her, but then when i have to take her in for an issue she may have, i emotionally fast forward to panic and a feeling of losing her even though it usually ends up as a virus that passes. and if i see sweet things that other children do i just get all emotional because it makes me think of how much i love my daughter and want to be with her forever. i guess it ties to a reality that everyone dies, but with her i just feel it so strongly. and it's hard to subdue these feelings when i give her treatments every day and it keeps me so much in the reality of how responsible i feel to keep her alive and well.
 

missnth

New member
thanks for your responses. my problem is that while logically i know what you are saying, emotionally i just can't control it. when i get an emotional trigger, which can happen at any time, i have to hold back tears while i am in the grocery or in my car. i am just so caught up in it. and the thing is that i don't focus on the negative, but i feel the negative. i enjoy all my time with her, but then when i have to take her in for an issue she may have, i emotionally fast forward to panic and a feeling of losing her even though it usually ends up as a virus that passes. and if i see sweet things that other children do i just get all emotional because it makes me think of how much i love my daughter and want to be with her forever. i guess it ties to a reality that everyone dies, but with her i just feel it so strongly. and it's hard to subdue these feelings when i give her treatments every day and it keeps me so much in the reality of how responsible i feel to keep her alive and well.
 
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