JennifersHope
New member
Show me the facts....... from Prof journals.
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being a nanny
- Thread starter ashton2005
- Start date
Amy, I respect your opinion but I believe it's not always in the childs best interest to have a stay-at-home mom. I have experience on both sides of the spectrum so feel that I can honestly say that my daughter and I have a better relationship when I'm working. I also know a few children who had stay-at-home moms from day one and they have no idea how to interact with other children, behave with other adults and their parents can't be 10 feet away from them without the child going into hysterics. Is that in the best interest of the child? Yes, their parents love them, yes they have the childs best interest in mind, but the child is learning nothing about the "real world". They have learned nothing about sharing, interacting with other children, etc. Kindergarten will be very difficult for this child. My daughter who has been in daycare and home with me now is a very well-rounded individual, she realizes that she's not being singled out when it comes to discipline, she has to share with the other kids, she has to be polite, it's not all about her.
Now, I don't mean to debate the sahm issue and not all sahm dismiss discipline like the mother I mentioned above, but I've seen it in more than one family. It's like the parents think because their child isn't going to be in public that they don't have to follow the rules of the public, which is generally just being a nice person. It's gotten so bad that we've stopped taking our daughter over to their house because the other child pushes, hits, takes toys away or hides them from my daughter because she's never been taught otherwise. Those qualities will never help her in life.
I hope for your sake that you are able to stay home with your children (when you have them) but it's not necessarily the best option for every family. Show me an article that says being home with mom is the best for every child and I'm sure I can find one that states that attending daycare, pre-school, etc. is in the best interest of children. There are articles for both sides of this debate.
Now, I don't mean to debate the sahm issue and not all sahm dismiss discipline like the mother I mentioned above, but I've seen it in more than one family. It's like the parents think because their child isn't going to be in public that they don't have to follow the rules of the public, which is generally just being a nice person. It's gotten so bad that we've stopped taking our daughter over to their house because the other child pushes, hits, takes toys away or hides them from my daughter because she's never been taught otherwise. Those qualities will never help her in life.
I hope for your sake that you are able to stay home with your children (when you have them) but it's not necessarily the best option for every family. Show me an article that says being home with mom is the best for every child and I'm sure I can find one that states that attending daycare, pre-school, etc. is in the best interest of children. There are articles for both sides of this debate.
coltsfan715
New member
Holy Geez has this gotten a bit off topic.
Christi,
I say go for it. That is a perfect way for you to be involved with your child and also open them up to new experiences. My cousin stayed at home with her first child for about the first 4 yrs of her life. She was completely withdrawn those 4 years. Like some have mentioned being in a situation where she had to interact with other kids (once we brought up the idea of preschool) she blossomed. Being around other people and not in a situation where she is always depending on her mom helped her mature greatly.
I think nannying would be a great way for you to bring in some extra money and also give your kids a great opportunity to make new friends and develop.
As for what you keep mentioning Amy. That may be true in some instances that people staying home with their kids is beneficial, but that does not mean it is in all cases damaging to a child's development if their parent's do not stay home with them. If you are a good/capable/loving parent you will be able to give your child what they need whether you stay home with them or whether you work by choice or out of necessity. As for the comment about people not having kids if they can't afford to have one and raise it "properly". Sorry to say but that was rude and inconsiderate and also something that in my opinion should have been kept to yourself. You may have your opinion, but to insinuate that a mother that chooses to work to help support her family AND her child is not doing a "proper" job is just ludicrous.
Good Luck Christi. Please let us know how it goes when/if you start nannying.
Take Care,
Lindsey
Christi,
I say go for it. That is a perfect way for you to be involved with your child and also open them up to new experiences. My cousin stayed at home with her first child for about the first 4 yrs of her life. She was completely withdrawn those 4 years. Like some have mentioned being in a situation where she had to interact with other kids (once we brought up the idea of preschool) she blossomed. Being around other people and not in a situation where she is always depending on her mom helped her mature greatly.
I think nannying would be a great way for you to bring in some extra money and also give your kids a great opportunity to make new friends and develop.
As for what you keep mentioning Amy. That may be true in some instances that people staying home with their kids is beneficial, but that does not mean it is in all cases damaging to a child's development if their parent's do not stay home with them. If you are a good/capable/loving parent you will be able to give your child what they need whether you stay home with them or whether you work by choice or out of necessity. As for the comment about people not having kids if they can't afford to have one and raise it "properly". Sorry to say but that was rude and inconsiderate and also something that in my opinion should have been kept to yourself. You may have your opinion, but to insinuate that a mother that chooses to work to help support her family AND her child is not doing a "proper" job is just ludicrous.
Good Luck Christi. Please let us know how it goes when/if you start nannying.
Take Care,
Lindsey
<div class="FTQUOTE"><begin quote><i>Originally posted by: <b>amy</b></i>
the reality of every child on the planet. children do best when they have a parent who stays home with them. no one can raise a kid better than its parent(s).
</end quote></div>
I have read an article that showed children who go to daycare adjust better to school and have a headstart over children who dont.
<div class="FTQUOTE"><begin quote><i>Originally posted by: <b>amy</b></i>
this isn't something i just made up for fun or to make people angry. it's a cold hard reality and people get so angry and so upset when people talk about what's in a child's best interest. It's bizarre.
</end quote></div>
What was upsetting to me was how you post telling her how to live her life, and raise her children. It was a rude and innapproiate, that is waht upset me.
the reality of every child on the planet. children do best when they have a parent who stays home with them. no one can raise a kid better than its parent(s).
</end quote></div>
I have read an article that showed children who go to daycare adjust better to school and have a headstart over children who dont.
<div class="FTQUOTE"><begin quote><i>Originally posted by: <b>amy</b></i>
this isn't something i just made up for fun or to make people angry. it's a cold hard reality and people get so angry and so upset when people talk about what's in a child's best interest. It's bizarre.
</end quote></div>
What was upsetting to me was how you post telling her how to live her life, and raise her children. It was a rude and innapproiate, that is waht upset me.
<div class="FTQUOTE"><begin quote><i>Originally posted by: <b>Chill4291</b></i>
<div class="FTQUOTE"><begin quote><i>Originally posted by: <b>amy</b></i>
the reality of every child on the planet. children do best when they have a parent who stays home with them. no one can raise a kid better than its parent(s).
</end quote></div>
I have read an article that showed children who go to daycare adjust better to school and have a headstart over children who dont.
<div class="FTQUOTE"><begin quote><i>Originally posted by: <b>amy</b></i>
this isn't something i just made up for fun or to make people angry. it's a cold hard reality and people get so angry and so upset when people talk about what's in a child's best interest. It's bizarre.
</end quote></div>
What was upsetting to me was how you post telling her how to live her life, and raise her children. It was a rude and innapproiate, that is waht upset me.</end quote></div>
she asked for an opinion of babysitting other people's kids! i gave my opinion.
people can't take opposing opinions on this site. if someone asks a question, is everyone supposed to agree with the poster? that's bogus.
if you don't want opinions, don't ask for them.
<div class="FTQUOTE"><begin quote><i>Originally posted by: <b>amy</b></i>
the reality of every child on the planet. children do best when they have a parent who stays home with them. no one can raise a kid better than its parent(s).
</end quote></div>
I have read an article that showed children who go to daycare adjust better to school and have a headstart over children who dont.
<div class="FTQUOTE"><begin quote><i>Originally posted by: <b>amy</b></i>
this isn't something i just made up for fun or to make people angry. it's a cold hard reality and people get so angry and so upset when people talk about what's in a child's best interest. It's bizarre.
</end quote></div>
What was upsetting to me was how you post telling her how to live her life, and raise her children. It was a rude and innapproiate, that is waht upset me.</end quote></div>
she asked for an opinion of babysitting other people's kids! i gave my opinion.
people can't take opposing opinions on this site. if someone asks a question, is everyone supposed to agree with the poster? that's bogus.
if you don't want opinions, don't ask for them.
J
Jenica
Guest
Amy, Christi wasn't asking opinions on whether or not she would still be a good mom if she began nannying. She was asking about possible illnesses due to having additional children in her house.
Often times its not the info that is given but how its presented. Lets rephrase things.....it has been proven (fill in the appropriate source of info here________) that kids do better when Moms stay at home with the kids.
This topic reminds me of the breast feeding topic. "Professionals" say its best if blah, blah; too bad it doesnt work that easy for everyone.
Speaking as a Mom who worked for a bit after having my daughter. I feel that as a Mom I did better with that break. I had more patience with her, I utilized our time together better & in many ways just appreciated motherhood better. Does that apply to all Moms? NO Does it make me a bad Mom? NO Just like being a full time stay at home mom doesnt equal better mom nor does it mean (depending on the individuals again) that the child comes out ahead.
Speaking as one who has babysat. It has its bad/good days. Like anything else in life. If you have a good set of parents that understand your needs then that is half the battle. The rest is up to you. If you dont feel you can juggle the balance of caring for Ashton as he needs & caring for the kids as they need then dont do it. I dount that you would neglect Ashtons true needs (not just wants as many kids have LOL) because of it.
This topic is one that we wont agree on (as has shown when its come up in the past with the same people arguing the same things) so lets just present our thoughts & leave it at that. Give Christi some feedback & let her make HER decision that is best for HER family!
This topic reminds me of the breast feeding topic. "Professionals" say its best if blah, blah; too bad it doesnt work that easy for everyone.
Speaking as a Mom who worked for a bit after having my daughter. I feel that as a Mom I did better with that break. I had more patience with her, I utilized our time together better & in many ways just appreciated motherhood better. Does that apply to all Moms? NO Does it make me a bad Mom? NO Just like being a full time stay at home mom doesnt equal better mom nor does it mean (depending on the individuals again) that the child comes out ahead.
Speaking as one who has babysat. It has its bad/good days. Like anything else in life. If you have a good set of parents that understand your needs then that is half the battle. The rest is up to you. If you dont feel you can juggle the balance of caring for Ashton as he needs & caring for the kids as they need then dont do it. I dount that you would neglect Ashtons true needs (not just wants as many kids have LOL) because of it.
This topic is one that we wont agree on (as has shown when its come up in the past with the same people arguing the same things) so lets just present our thoughts & leave it at that. Give Christi some feedback & let her make HER decision that is best for HER family!
I tend to agree with the idea that "what is best for a child" depends on many factors, all of which tend to get oversimplified because we all tend to judge others by our own positions in life. I am the child of a woman who worked, not of necessity, but because she loved her job and was exceptionally gifted at it (she was a marvelous math teacher; taught calculus). She raised three, loving, highly functional children, all of whom are very successul, happily married (I am the youngest, and married ten years), and raising great children. I work, but in a job with great flexibility (a professor), my sister in law works in a high pressure job with long hours, and my other sister in law stays home. Each of these paths works for that family; by "works" I mean that it is producing highly centered children who are loving, self-aware, doing well in school, and generally well-adjusted.
That being said, I could not bear to live my sister in laws lives, although I respect and love both of them deeply. I could not give up the kind of time my sister does with her children, although I understand that she has an extended family that provides the support and love my niece and nephew need better than she could if she was at home and feeling profoundly unfulfilled (which is very true of her). I also know that I could not give up my own job without a very deep sense of losing my life calling. I work because I love what I do: I have a talent for it, and I believe doing what I do is central to my purpose in life. It is not more central than my children, and if I get to the point where the two conflict in a way I cannot resolve, I will choose my children. But most days, my joy at what I do gives me the energy and strength and patience I need to find some balance between work and kids. I am more joyful and patient with my family, because I am walking the path I think I need to walk. Finally, my other sister in law felt so torn between job and family that is was only a source of unhappiness and friction for her. She is happier, her family is happier, if she does not work. She is an amazing and generous homemaker. She sews, refinishes furniture, and does many other things that amaze me, and that, too, is a calling and a talent.
What matters is that children have to be central, not peripheral. They need active parents. I actually agree strongly with Amy on this. But I have seen stay at home parents that are utterly absent to their children, and working moms that are always present to them (as my own mother was). I leave work early to spend afternoons with my girls. When I am with them, I give them my full attention. I go back to work after they go to bed. I sit with my daughters for every treatment and read to them. I am teaching my daughters to swim this summer. I love that time with them. My girls are very, very well-adjusted, despite the traumas they have had to experience because of this disease. I am no supermom; I am a very flawed person. But the simple truth is, I am at peace with my choices, and I am not guilty about the way I live my life. It is the right path for my family and my kids, although it may not be right for another woman. That, in the end, is what kids need. They need love and time, and they need not be objects of our anxiety and resentment. Find that path, and you are doing just great, no matter what others says about it.
That being said, I could not bear to live my sister in laws lives, although I respect and love both of them deeply. I could not give up the kind of time my sister does with her children, although I understand that she has an extended family that provides the support and love my niece and nephew need better than she could if she was at home and feeling profoundly unfulfilled (which is very true of her). I also know that I could not give up my own job without a very deep sense of losing my life calling. I work because I love what I do: I have a talent for it, and I believe doing what I do is central to my purpose in life. It is not more central than my children, and if I get to the point where the two conflict in a way I cannot resolve, I will choose my children. But most days, my joy at what I do gives me the energy and strength and patience I need to find some balance between work and kids. I am more joyful and patient with my family, because I am walking the path I think I need to walk. Finally, my other sister in law felt so torn between job and family that is was only a source of unhappiness and friction for her. She is happier, her family is happier, if she does not work. She is an amazing and generous homemaker. She sews, refinishes furniture, and does many other things that amaze me, and that, too, is a calling and a talent.
What matters is that children have to be central, not peripheral. They need active parents. I actually agree strongly with Amy on this. But I have seen stay at home parents that are utterly absent to their children, and working moms that are always present to them (as my own mother was). I leave work early to spend afternoons with my girls. When I am with them, I give them my full attention. I go back to work after they go to bed. I sit with my daughters for every treatment and read to them. I am teaching my daughters to swim this summer. I love that time with them. My girls are very, very well-adjusted, despite the traumas they have had to experience because of this disease. I am no supermom; I am a very flawed person. But the simple truth is, I am at peace with my choices, and I am not guilty about the way I live my life. It is the right path for my family and my kids, although it may not be right for another woman. That, in the end, is what kids need. They need love and time, and they need not be objects of our anxiety and resentment. Find that path, and you are doing just great, no matter what others says about it.
<div class="FTQUOTE"><begin quote><i>Originally posted by: <b>letefk</b></i>
I tend to agree with the idea that "what is best for a child" depends on many factors, all of which tend to get oversimplified because we all tend to judge others by our own positions in life. I am the child of a woman who worked, not of necessity, but because she loved her job and was exceptionally gifted at it (she was a marvelous math teacher; taught calculus). She raised three, loving, highly functional children, all of whom are very successul, happily married (I am the youngest, and married ten years), and raising great children. I work, but in a job with great flexibility (a professor), my sister in law works in a high pressure job with long hours, and my other sister in law stays home. Each of these paths works for that family; by "works" I mean that it is producing highly centered children who are loving, self-aware, doing well in school, and generally well-adjusted.
That being said, I could not bear to live my sister in laws lives, although I respect and love both of them deeply. I could not give up the kind of time my sister does with her children, although I understand that she has an extended family that provides the support and love my niece and nephew need better than she could if she was at home and feeling profoundly unfulfilled (which is very true of her). I also know that I could not give up my own job without a very deep sense of losing my life calling. I work because I love what I do: I have a talent for it, and I believe doing what I do is central to my purpose in life. It is not more central than my children, and if I get to the point where the two conflict in a way I cannot resolve, I will choose my children. But most days, my joy at what I do gives me the energy and strength and patience I need to find some balance between work and kids. I am more joyful and patient with my family, because I am walking the path I think I need to walk. Finally, my other sister in law felt so torn between job and family that is was only a source of unhappiness and friction for her. She is happier, her family is happier, if she does not work. She is an amazing and generous homemaker. She sews, refinishes furniture, and does many other things that amaze me, and that, too, is a calling and a talent.
What matters is that children have to be central, not peripheral. They need active parents. I actually agree strongly with Amy on this. But I have seen stay at home parents that are utterly absent to their children, and working moms that are always present to them (as my own mother was). I leave work early to spend afternoons with my girls. When I am with them, I give them my full attention. I go back to work after they go to bed. I sit with my daughters for every treatment and read to them. I am teaching my daughters to swim this summer. I love that time with them. My girls are very, very well-adjusted, despite the traumas they have had to experience because of this disease. I am no supermom; I am a very flawed person. But the simple truth is, I am at peace with my choices, and I am not guilty about the way I live my life. It is the right path for my family and my kids, although it may not be right for another woman. That, in the end, is what kids need. They need love and time, and they need not be objects of our anxiety and resentment. Find that path, and you are doing just great, no matter what others says about it.</end quote></div>
Very well said, Laura!
I tend to agree with the idea that "what is best for a child" depends on many factors, all of which tend to get oversimplified because we all tend to judge others by our own positions in life. I am the child of a woman who worked, not of necessity, but because she loved her job and was exceptionally gifted at it (she was a marvelous math teacher; taught calculus). She raised three, loving, highly functional children, all of whom are very successul, happily married (I am the youngest, and married ten years), and raising great children. I work, but in a job with great flexibility (a professor), my sister in law works in a high pressure job with long hours, and my other sister in law stays home. Each of these paths works for that family; by "works" I mean that it is producing highly centered children who are loving, self-aware, doing well in school, and generally well-adjusted.
That being said, I could not bear to live my sister in laws lives, although I respect and love both of them deeply. I could not give up the kind of time my sister does with her children, although I understand that she has an extended family that provides the support and love my niece and nephew need better than she could if she was at home and feeling profoundly unfulfilled (which is very true of her). I also know that I could not give up my own job without a very deep sense of losing my life calling. I work because I love what I do: I have a talent for it, and I believe doing what I do is central to my purpose in life. It is not more central than my children, and if I get to the point where the two conflict in a way I cannot resolve, I will choose my children. But most days, my joy at what I do gives me the energy and strength and patience I need to find some balance between work and kids. I am more joyful and patient with my family, because I am walking the path I think I need to walk. Finally, my other sister in law felt so torn between job and family that is was only a source of unhappiness and friction for her. She is happier, her family is happier, if she does not work. She is an amazing and generous homemaker. She sews, refinishes furniture, and does many other things that amaze me, and that, too, is a calling and a talent.
What matters is that children have to be central, not peripheral. They need active parents. I actually agree strongly with Amy on this. But I have seen stay at home parents that are utterly absent to their children, and working moms that are always present to them (as my own mother was). I leave work early to spend afternoons with my girls. When I am with them, I give them my full attention. I go back to work after they go to bed. I sit with my daughters for every treatment and read to them. I am teaching my daughters to swim this summer. I love that time with them. My girls are very, very well-adjusted, despite the traumas they have had to experience because of this disease. I am no supermom; I am a very flawed person. But the simple truth is, I am at peace with my choices, and I am not guilty about the way I live my life. It is the right path for my family and my kids, although it may not be right for another woman. That, in the end, is what kids need. They need love and time, and they need not be objects of our anxiety and resentment. Find that path, and you are doing just great, no matter what others says about it.</end quote></div>
Very well said, Laura!
<div class="FTQUOTE"><begin quote><i>Originally posted by: <b>Chill4291</b></i>
Amy, MY BAD! See, when I read it, I thought she asked if anyone else nannys. And if they have run into problems. I didn't realize she was asking for parent advice.
SeanD would be proud, the attack posse is strong in you.</end quote></div>
Having a kid that is sick from other kids with colds around does have to do with being a stay at home mom and focusing on your young child.....
Sorry that I wasn't clear on that connection. i was sure it was obvious.......
Amy, MY BAD! See, when I read it, I thought she asked if anyone else nannys. And if they have run into problems. I didn't realize she was asking for parent advice.
SeanD would be proud, the attack posse is strong in you.</end quote></div>
Having a kid that is sick from other kids with colds around does have to do with being a stay at home mom and focusing on your young child.....
Sorry that I wasn't clear on that connection. i was sure it was obvious.......
JennifersHope
New member
<div class="FTQUOTE"><begin quote><i>Originally posted by: <b>JennifersHope</b></i>
Show me the facts....... from Prof journals.</end quote></div>
Amy, I am really curious where you got your cold hard facts from.. I would love to see peer reviewed professional articles to back up what you are saying. I am not trying to be a snot about it.. I really would like to see it......
Facts are not based on others beliefs but on actual clincal trials and studies and if you are going to say something is the cold hard facts I would like you to back it up.
I belong to several peer reviewed professional journals including children's ones.. Not anywhere, or in one article that I was able to find does it say it is better for a child to stay at home with the parent.. That is a generalized statement and that can never be made with a human being.. ever their are to many variables...
Please show me, I am really interested in those articles..... Again your reality doesn't mean it is a proven fact... just that you feel strongly about something, which I respect.. the whole judging thing is what makes me nuts...
Jennifer
Show me the facts....... from Prof journals.</end quote></div>
Amy, I am really curious where you got your cold hard facts from.. I would love to see peer reviewed professional articles to back up what you are saying. I am not trying to be a snot about it.. I really would like to see it......
Facts are not based on others beliefs but on actual clincal trials and studies and if you are going to say something is the cold hard facts I would like you to back it up.
I belong to several peer reviewed professional journals including children's ones.. Not anywhere, or in one article that I was able to find does it say it is better for a child to stay at home with the parent.. That is a generalized statement and that can never be made with a human being.. ever their are to many variables...
Please show me, I am really interested in those articles..... Again your reality doesn't mean it is a proven fact... just that you feel strongly about something, which I respect.. the whole judging thing is what makes me nuts...
Jennifer
DietRootBeer
New member
Well said Karen....I 100% agree with everything you just said<img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-smile.gif" border="0">
ashton2005
New member
WELL EVERYONE IM DONE WITH THIS SITE I ASKED WHAT PEOPLE HAVE DONE IF THEY WERE NANNYS IF THEIR CHILDREN GOT SICK.. AND I DONT THINK THAT EVER GOT ANSWERED... THIS IS GETTING OLD EVERY TIME I POST SOMETHING SOMEONE THINKS THT I AM OR SOMEONE ELSE IS A BAD PARENT FOR IT.. IM SICK OF IT I WILL STICK WITH THE OTHER FORUM OR JUST NOT ASK AT ALL FOR ANYONES HELP OR THOUGHTFULLNESS.. I WILL WAIT TO SEE IF THE EXTENDED HOSPITAL STAY HAPPENS AND FIGURE IT OUT THEN.. BYE
Amy, come one. She asked about an opinion on being a nanny, but relating to Ashton having CF. Not whether it would mean she is now a "working" mom and not raising her child. I really think that if people can't answer the initial poster's questions, then don't bother posting a response to that person.
It's not that you aren't entitled to share your opinion, but KEEP IT ON TASK. She asked a very clear question and also asked for experience. If you can't answer her very CLEAR question (nannying relating to CF) OR give some experience of you having a child with CF and being a nanny, then just skip it.
Christi, Mark's mom use to frequently babysit neighbor kids (on a regular basis, like Tuesday, Thursday Friday's) when he was little to bring in extra cash, she was also a working mom but she did this too. When the other kids got sick, she kept them apart (like one would do in school/daycare) but it REALLY helped Mark to socalize with others and since the kids were older (which sounds like the age of the kids you will be watching) they pretty much entertain themselves and just need help with stuff like meals, some adult interaction and such. Mark didn't get sick anymore when his mom was doing this than he would get sick when she wasn't. I would say go for it.
It's very convenient that they are just a few doors down and the same age as your older child.
Christi, I hope you really don't go. There are some that just need to stay away from this families board because they don't have the tact to give parents (who may or may not STILL be struggling with a CF diagnosis) honest, yet kind and ON TASK advice/responses.
I would like to stay in touch with you, just to hear updates on how Ashton is doing. Please email me if you ever feel like it, division902@hotmail.com
It's not that you aren't entitled to share your opinion, but KEEP IT ON TASK. She asked a very clear question and also asked for experience. If you can't answer her very CLEAR question (nannying relating to CF) OR give some experience of you having a child with CF and being a nanny, then just skip it.
Christi, Mark's mom use to frequently babysit neighbor kids (on a regular basis, like Tuesday, Thursday Friday's) when he was little to bring in extra cash, she was also a working mom but she did this too. When the other kids got sick, she kept them apart (like one would do in school/daycare) but it REALLY helped Mark to socalize with others and since the kids were older (which sounds like the age of the kids you will be watching) they pretty much entertain themselves and just need help with stuff like meals, some adult interaction and such. Mark didn't get sick anymore when his mom was doing this than he would get sick when she wasn't. I would say go for it.
It's very convenient that they are just a few doors down and the same age as your older child.
Christi, I hope you really don't go. There are some that just need to stay away from this families board because they don't have the tact to give parents (who may or may not STILL be struggling with a CF diagnosis) honest, yet kind and ON TASK advice/responses.
I would like to stay in touch with you, just to hear updates on how Ashton is doing. Please email me if you ever feel like it, division902@hotmail.com
Christi, I am so sorry this has become a battleground. I'll try to get right to the point. For the first few months I started to work as a preschool teacher, my son and I both had a constant "mild" cold. He was not diagnosed with CF at the time and so I wasn't too worried. He was exposed to a ton of germs, viruses, etc... After a while, we both became immune to most of the preschool nastiness.
Since you will only be watching two other kids, your exposure to germs will be lessened. I feel that it is important for kids to be exposed to everyday germs in order to build up the immune system. Since our boys have CF we need to keep a close watch of what are exposed to. I hope this helps.
Since you will only be watching two other kids, your exposure to germs will be lessened. I feel that it is important for kids to be exposed to everyday germs in order to build up the immune system. Since our boys have CF we need to keep a close watch of what are exposed to. I hope this helps.
Christi,
My daughter did not have CF so this might not be helpful information. I stayed home with my dauhter for the first 3 years. After the 1st year (in a city that we had just moved to) I was a babling idiot and had met 5 other mothers who were too. We started a cooperative playroup. First 2 mothers and 6 kids. Later 1 mother and 5 kids. That meant that each of us had 3-4 mnornings free a week. The last year (when she was 3) I babysat one girl during the nonplaygroup time as well and watched 2 other kids after school. When she was old enouh for nursery school I found a great Montessori school that went all day and went back to work fulltime.
As far as illness went, the rule was that sick kids did not come to my house. When my daughter was sick, I called the parents and they decided what to do (assuming I was up to caring for the kids when mine was ill.) It was like making(o decisions if I had had several children rather than one. (OK it was more like havin quintuplets sometimes) And my daughter enjoyed NOT being an only child for the hours that the other kids were at the house. And I thrived on the time off to explore my own interests with a little pocket money to do it.
I don't remember any of the kids being any sicker than they would have anyway. And there were time when my daughter was recovering from something (but not contagious) that the other kids came and were a distraction and a comfort to her.
Since it's something you're innterested in doing, why not try it? It is easy to stop doing it if it doesn't work out well for you.
My daughter did not have CF so this might not be helpful information. I stayed home with my dauhter for the first 3 years. After the 1st year (in a city that we had just moved to) I was a babling idiot and had met 5 other mothers who were too. We started a cooperative playroup. First 2 mothers and 6 kids. Later 1 mother and 5 kids. That meant that each of us had 3-4 mnornings free a week. The last year (when she was 3) I babysat one girl during the nonplaygroup time as well and watched 2 other kids after school. When she was old enouh for nursery school I found a great Montessori school that went all day and went back to work fulltime.
As far as illness went, the rule was that sick kids did not come to my house. When my daughter was sick, I called the parents and they decided what to do (assuming I was up to caring for the kids when mine was ill.) It was like making(o decisions if I had had several children rather than one. (OK it was more like havin quintuplets sometimes) And my daughter enjoyed NOT being an only child for the hours that the other kids were at the house. And I thrived on the time off to explore my own interests with a little pocket money to do it.
I don't remember any of the kids being any sicker than they would have anyway. And there were time when my daughter was recovering from something (but not contagious) that the other kids came and were a distraction and a comfort to her.
Since it's something you're innterested in doing, why not try it? It is easy to stop doing it if it doesn't work out well for you.
If there's one thing I have learned from reading Amy's posts, it is that she thinks she is right about everything, doesn't give an inch, and has no problem being insensitive.
I work in Early Intervention as I've said before. I see families with all different situations. Babies with significant health problems, families where everyone works 2 jobs, stay at home moms. I even go to a nursery with drug addicted babies and toddlers (where there is a cf kiddo). The kids who go to daycare are not worse off than the kids who stay at home. In fact, when I see kids who stay at home with just their mom, I encourage them to join a play group or do half days a couple days a week at a daycare or something to get out of the house and around other kids. Kids without peer models don't do as well as those (at least language wise) with peer models. And I can find research to prove that if you'd like. I see many medically fragile kids and the proper precautions are ALWAYS put into place, but being a normal, social person is improtant.
I should say I don't think there's anything wrong with being a stay at home mom if your situation allows it. It's an important job. But there is no reason to feel guilty if your situation does not allow it. If you find a supportive and enriching placement, your child will not suffer.
I hope you stay on this site. There are certain people you will learn to ignore.
I work in Early Intervention as I've said before. I see families with all different situations. Babies with significant health problems, families where everyone works 2 jobs, stay at home moms. I even go to a nursery with drug addicted babies and toddlers (where there is a cf kiddo). The kids who go to daycare are not worse off than the kids who stay at home. In fact, when I see kids who stay at home with just their mom, I encourage them to join a play group or do half days a couple days a week at a daycare or something to get out of the house and around other kids. Kids without peer models don't do as well as those (at least language wise) with peer models. And I can find research to prove that if you'd like. I see many medically fragile kids and the proper precautions are ALWAYS put into place, but being a normal, social person is improtant.
I should say I don't think there's anything wrong with being a stay at home mom if your situation allows it. It's an important job. But there is no reason to feel guilty if your situation does not allow it. If you find a supportive and enriching placement, your child will not suffer.
I hope you stay on this site. There are certain people you will learn to ignore.
"Kids without peer models don't do as well as those (at least language wise) with peer models."
Sorry i was in a rush. I should have also said peer models enhance:
social/emotional growth: sharing, attachment issues, making friends, socializing...
cognitive skills: exploring, thinking, playing, pretending...
adaptive skills: meeting own needs such as drinking from a cup, self-feeding...
receptive language skills: following directions, understanding
expressive language skills: spoken vocabulary, word forms
fine motor skills: using hands and other small muscles
gross motor skills: running, jumping
I also realize your original question had nothing to do with this. I'm sorry for that. I think like others have said, give it a go, and if it doesn't work out, at least you tried. It can't hurt!
Sorry i was in a rush. I should have also said peer models enhance:
social/emotional growth: sharing, attachment issues, making friends, socializing...
cognitive skills: exploring, thinking, playing, pretending...
adaptive skills: meeting own needs such as drinking from a cup, self-feeding...
receptive language skills: following directions, understanding
expressive language skills: spoken vocabulary, word forms
fine motor skills: using hands and other small muscles
gross motor skills: running, jumping
I also realize your original question had nothing to do with this. I'm sorry for that. I think like others have said, give it a go, and if it doesn't work out, at least you tried. It can't hurt!
You already have an older child, Abbi, who I assume is going to school or will be going to school. She'll be exposed to other children in that environment and will bringing home different colds and bugs and you'll be dealing with that situation.
In terms of being a nanny there are LOTS of people who do child care in their homes and sometimes they become ill or their children are ill. As long as you go into this telling your parents that this may happen from time to time, so they'll know they'll have to make other arrangments. People who send their children to a home based child care enviroment are used to dealing with this.
I'd say go for it. Ashton can get some socialization and you can earn a little money, too. L
In terms of being a nanny there are LOTS of people who do child care in their homes and sometimes they become ill or their children are ill. As long as you go into this telling your parents that this may happen from time to time, so they'll know they'll have to make other arrangments. People who send their children to a home based child care enviroment are used to dealing with this.
I'd say go for it. Ashton can get some socialization and you can earn a little money, too. L