dealing with the issue of child care

Ratatosk

Administrator
Staff member
DS goes to a daycare center, which has a preschool program. I think there are 7 kids in his age group/class. We thought long and hard about our decision to send ds and part of our decision stemmed from the fact that eventually he's going to go to school. And the place he goes to has very strict, stringent guidelines as far as sanitizing thing, handwashing, illness... At the time I would've preferred having someone with just a couple of kids care for him. But he has thrived and really enjoys "school".

Last week I got an email from a friend of mine whose grandaughter has CF and goes to a very small family daycare. They'd had her screened for preschool for next year, when she'll be 4 years old, but opted not to send her because the it exceeds their clinic's rule of 6 -- no more than 6 children in a playgroup, daycare environment. Which I thought was odd because they intend to send her to kindergarten the following year. But whatever you're comfortable with, whatever works for you.
 
T

tammykrumrey

Guest
Sandra,

I competely agree with you. It is a personal choice in which we should not be judged. No one has walked in our shoes nor do they know all the specifics of our situations. And not all CF kids are created equal in the severity of their disease as little ones. And I am the one who carries the insurance, always has. I pay nothing in insurance cost as far as a premium goes. Not one cent for my entire family. And we have great coverage that I am not willing to give up.

Our doctors told us the same as you, don't worry about them being in daycare. They are going to catch those colds sometime, might as well get it over with while school doesn't 'count'. They do catch things, but they are immune to most of those common things that seem to come around. And if there is no scientific proof that kids don't build immunity, then so be it. But my kids hardly ever got sick, and at 7 and 8 years old, both have normal PFT's in the high 90s. And even to this day, they may catch one cold a year, if that. The only time one is on an antibiotic it is due to PA or MRSA, which are CF issues, not due to being around other kids. And my neice who lives with her grandparents and mom never went to daycare a single day of her life, and that kid was sick and on an antibiotic, what seemed to be, every other week. And when my girls were little and in daycare, I was lucky enough that if they were having a bad day and didn't want to go, I could take them with me to work. Not everyone has that luxury. But usually they couldn't wait to go play with their friends. We did not live in a subdivision with kids. Not a single one. They loved playing with other kids!

I cannot stand it when people try making me feel like a bad mom just because I work. Everything I do revolves around my girls. As a matter of fact, outside of work the only life I have is with my girls. They are with me at work as soon as they get out of school. (They like to play with their Grandpa after school (I work for my parents)). They even still sleep with me at night. My poor husband<img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-sad.gif" border="0">
Literally I go hardly any place without them. Someone asked me today for a babysitter referral, and I could not give them one single name! We use no babysitters! It's grandma's or nothing!

I am a GREAT mom! I make mistakes just like everyone does, but when it comes to my girls, their best interest is always in my heart. I do not think we should be measured in whether we work or not. Sorry to go on and on, but this hurts my heart when people feel like they are being judged in a situation in which they are not even in. Us CF parents have enough to deal with without having to feel guilty about working too.
 
T

tammykrumrey

Guest
Sandra,

I competely agree with you. It is a personal choice in which we should not be judged. No one has walked in our shoes nor do they know all the specifics of our situations. And not all CF kids are created equal in the severity of their disease as little ones. And I am the one who carries the insurance, always has. I pay nothing in insurance cost as far as a premium goes. Not one cent for my entire family. And we have great coverage that I am not willing to give up.

Our doctors told us the same as you, don't worry about them being in daycare. They are going to catch those colds sometime, might as well get it over with while school doesn't 'count'. They do catch things, but they are immune to most of those common things that seem to come around. And if there is no scientific proof that kids don't build immunity, then so be it. But my kids hardly ever got sick, and at 7 and 8 years old, both have normal PFT's in the high 90s. And even to this day, they may catch one cold a year, if that. The only time one is on an antibiotic it is due to PA or MRSA, which are CF issues, not due to being around other kids. And my neice who lives with her grandparents and mom never went to daycare a single day of her life, and that kid was sick and on an antibiotic, what seemed to be, every other week. And when my girls were little and in daycare, I was lucky enough that if they were having a bad day and didn't want to go, I could take them with me to work. Not everyone has that luxury. But usually they couldn't wait to go play with their friends. We did not live in a subdivision with kids. Not a single one. They loved playing with other kids!

I cannot stand it when people try making me feel like a bad mom just because I work. Everything I do revolves around my girls. As a matter of fact, outside of work the only life I have is with my girls. They are with me at work as soon as they get out of school. (They like to play with their Grandpa after school (I work for my parents)). They even still sleep with me at night. My poor husband<img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-sad.gif" border="0">
Literally I go hardly any place without them. Someone asked me today for a babysitter referral, and I could not give them one single name! We use no babysitters! It's grandma's or nothing!

I am a GREAT mom! I make mistakes just like everyone does, but when it comes to my girls, their best interest is always in my heart. I do not think we should be measured in whether we work or not. Sorry to go on and on, but this hurts my heart when people feel like they are being judged in a situation in which they are not even in. Us CF parents have enough to deal with without having to feel guilty about working too.
 
T

tammykrumrey

Guest
Sandra,

I competely agree with you. It is a personal choice in which we should not be judged. No one has walked in our shoes nor do they know all the specifics of our situations. And not all CF kids are created equal in the severity of their disease as little ones. And I am the one who carries the insurance, always has. I pay nothing in insurance cost as far as a premium goes. Not one cent for my entire family. And we have great coverage that I am not willing to give up.

Our doctors told us the same as you, don't worry about them being in daycare. They are going to catch those colds sometime, might as well get it over with while school doesn't 'count'. They do catch things, but they are immune to most of those common things that seem to come around. And if there is no scientific proof that kids don't build immunity, then so be it. But my kids hardly ever got sick, and at 7 and 8 years old, both have normal PFT's in the high 90s. And even to this day, they may catch one cold a year, if that. The only time one is on an antibiotic it is due to PA or MRSA, which are CF issues, not due to being around other kids. And my neice who lives with her grandparents and mom never went to daycare a single day of her life, and that kid was sick and on an antibiotic, what seemed to be, every other week. And when my girls were little and in daycare, I was lucky enough that if they were having a bad day and didn't want to go, I could take them with me to work. Not everyone has that luxury. But usually they couldn't wait to go play with their friends. We did not live in a subdivision with kids. Not a single one. They loved playing with other kids!

I cannot stand it when people try making me feel like a bad mom just because I work. Everything I do revolves around my girls. As a matter of fact, outside of work the only life I have is with my girls. They are with me at work as soon as they get out of school. (They like to play with their Grandpa after school (I work for my parents)). They even still sleep with me at night. My poor husband<img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-sad.gif" border="0">
Literally I go hardly any place without them. Someone asked me today for a babysitter referral, and I could not give them one single name! We use no babysitters! It's grandma's or nothing!

I am a GREAT mom! I make mistakes just like everyone does, but when it comes to my girls, their best interest is always in my heart. I do not think we should be measured in whether we work or not. Sorry to go on and on, but this hurts my heart when people feel like they are being judged in a situation in which they are not even in. Us CF parents have enough to deal with without having to feel guilty about working too.
 
2

2perfectboys

Guest
There is no reason to feel pressure if u are comfortable with your decission. It is a personal choice that no one has a right to criticize. My son went to preschool 3 days a week when he was younger and I am happy I sent him. There are pros and cons on this issues. Some studies actually say kids that have been in daycare have better social skills and perform better academically. Just because u stay home with your kids do mean u are putting your kids first as Amy believes. U do your kids no good if they are sitting in front of the tv all day and have no structured activites. If u are staying hom and have discipline and your kids are willing to sit and learn from u, then that is fine.
 
2

2perfectboys

Guest
There is no reason to feel pressure if u are comfortable with your decission. It is a personal choice that no one has a right to criticize. My son went to preschool 3 days a week when he was younger and I am happy I sent him. There are pros and cons on this issues. Some studies actually say kids that have been in daycare have better social skills and perform better academically. Just because u stay home with your kids do mean u are putting your kids first as Amy believes. U do your kids no good if they are sitting in front of the tv all day and have no structured activites. If u are staying hom and have discipline and your kids are willing to sit and learn from u, then that is fine.
 
2

2perfectboys

Guest
There is no reason to feel pressure if u are comfortable with your decission. It is a personal choice that no one has a right to criticize. My son went to preschool 3 days a week when he was younger and I am happy I sent him. There are pros and cons on this issues. Some studies actually say kids that have been in daycare have better social skills and perform better academically. Just because u stay home with your kids do mean u are putting your kids first as Amy believes. U do your kids no good if they are sitting in front of the tv all day and have no structured activites. If u are staying hom and have discipline and your kids are willing to sit and learn from u, then that is fine.
 

JRPandTJP

New member
our oldest (no cf) went to preschool, and it was a germ fest. parents just didn't keep their kids home when they needed to be. with her we didn't worry until the latter half of the year ater Ben was dx. i also think that it is part of early childhood and building immunity, but they will still get there share of things just going out and being social if your at home with the kids (libraries, play lands, play group). either way we can't keep them in a bubble and we have to trust their immune system.

We had been tossing around alternative education choices for quite some time before our son (w/ cf) came along, so ultimately we decided home education was the best choice for our family. it is so much fun to watch your child explore the world around them without the pressures of testing and grades. I get the same rush watching my daughter read her first sentence without any help as I did seeing her first step. we are involved in a lot of group activities and social outings (great home ed community around here). The only difference is because people know us and are at home with their kids too, they tend to keep their kids away a bit longer if they have colds/flu since they know he has cf. It is like a built in courtesy like you'd have in a family setting.

anyways, your decision is your decision. you have to feel good about your choices and know that we are each ALWAYS doing our best for our children. home education isn't right for every family...we have a lot of support in our choice. one thing doesn't negate the other. it is the quality of time spent not always the quantity.

sorry about not capitalizing...i'm tired and feeling lazy.

Jody
 

JRPandTJP

New member
our oldest (no cf) went to preschool, and it was a germ fest. parents just didn't keep their kids home when they needed to be. with her we didn't worry until the latter half of the year ater Ben was dx. i also think that it is part of early childhood and building immunity, but they will still get there share of things just going out and being social if your at home with the kids (libraries, play lands, play group). either way we can't keep them in a bubble and we have to trust their immune system.

We had been tossing around alternative education choices for quite some time before our son (w/ cf) came along, so ultimately we decided home education was the best choice for our family. it is so much fun to watch your child explore the world around them without the pressures of testing and grades. I get the same rush watching my daughter read her first sentence without any help as I did seeing her first step. we are involved in a lot of group activities and social outings (great home ed community around here). The only difference is because people know us and are at home with their kids too, they tend to keep their kids away a bit longer if they have colds/flu since they know he has cf. It is like a built in courtesy like you'd have in a family setting.

anyways, your decision is your decision. you have to feel good about your choices and know that we are each ALWAYS doing our best for our children. home education isn't right for every family...we have a lot of support in our choice. one thing doesn't negate the other. it is the quality of time spent not always the quantity.

sorry about not capitalizing...i'm tired and feeling lazy.

Jody
 

JRPandTJP

New member
our oldest (no cf) went to preschool, and it was a germ fest. parents just didn't keep their kids home when they needed to be. with her we didn't worry until the latter half of the year ater Ben was dx. i also think that it is part of early childhood and building immunity, but they will still get there share of things just going out and being social if your at home with the kids (libraries, play lands, play group). either way we can't keep them in a bubble and we have to trust their immune system.

We had been tossing around alternative education choices for quite some time before our son (w/ cf) came along, so ultimately we decided home education was the best choice for our family. it is so much fun to watch your child explore the world around them without the pressures of testing and grades. I get the same rush watching my daughter read her first sentence without any help as I did seeing her first step. we are involved in a lot of group activities and social outings (great home ed community around here). The only difference is because people know us and are at home with their kids too, they tend to keep their kids away a bit longer if they have colds/flu since they know he has cf. It is like a built in courtesy like you'd have in a family setting.

anyways, your decision is your decision. you have to feel good about your choices and know that we are each ALWAYS doing our best for our children. home education isn't right for every family...we have a lot of support in our choice. one thing doesn't negate the other. it is the quality of time spent not always the quantity.

sorry about not capitalizing...i'm tired and feeling lazy.

Jody
 

sweetwhite30

New member
<img src="i/expressions/rose.gif" border="0">Me and my husband has made this decision since he was 2 he would be home schooled for his benefit. I teach him he can write letters and knows all his colors and shapes and abcs and can count to 25,everything i do i make a game of it for my toddler so he will learn from it.My kids are only allowed 2 hrs of tv a day,i personally feel tv is not a good thing certainly is not a baby sitter as some parents use it for. my kids day is very structured and thats how kids need it to be to thrive,and my c.f. doctor has said in the past he recommends home schooling when possible. With children with c.f the schools got to clean their air ducts and most have not in 25 yrs and thats why they grow pa alot from what i have been told and read.Not everyone can stay home and home school their kids some families have to have 2 incomes and i understand that.I never knock people for working but i personally stopped due to my son having his illness and the line of work i was doing which was banquet serving and was afraid of bring germs home from other people and the food possibly.I just worry alot about him and do my best to do whats in his best interest is all.
 

sweetwhite30

New member
<img src="i/expressions/rose.gif" border="0">Me and my husband has made this decision since he was 2 he would be home schooled for his benefit. I teach him he can write letters and knows all his colors and shapes and abcs and can count to 25,everything i do i make a game of it for my toddler so he will learn from it.My kids are only allowed 2 hrs of tv a day,i personally feel tv is not a good thing certainly is not a baby sitter as some parents use it for. my kids day is very structured and thats how kids need it to be to thrive,and my c.f. doctor has said in the past he recommends home schooling when possible. With children with c.f the schools got to clean their air ducts and most have not in 25 yrs and thats why they grow pa alot from what i have been told and read.Not everyone can stay home and home school their kids some families have to have 2 incomes and i understand that.I never knock people for working but i personally stopped due to my son having his illness and the line of work i was doing which was banquet serving and was afraid of bring germs home from other people and the food possibly.I just worry alot about him and do my best to do whats in his best interest is all.
 

sweetwhite30

New member
<img src="i/expressions/rose.gif" border="0">Me and my husband has made this decision since he was 2 he would be home schooled for his benefit. I teach him he can write letters and knows all his colors and shapes and abcs and can count to 25,everything i do i make a game of it for my toddler so he will learn from it.My kids are only allowed 2 hrs of tv a day,i personally feel tv is not a good thing certainly is not a baby sitter as some parents use it for. my kids day is very structured and thats how kids need it to be to thrive,and my c.f. doctor has said in the past he recommends home schooling when possible. With children with c.f the schools got to clean their air ducts and most have not in 25 yrs and thats why they grow pa alot from what i have been told and read.Not everyone can stay home and home school their kids some families have to have 2 incomes and i understand that.I never knock people for working but i personally stopped due to my son having his illness and the line of work i was doing which was banquet serving and was afraid of bring germs home from other people and the food possibly.I just worry alot about him and do my best to do whats in his best interest is all.
 

angelsmom

New member
Thanks Tammy for your post! I agree, I hate it that some people feel the need to make working moms feel bad for working and it is only compounded when there is a child with CF (or any other chronic condition) involved. Like you, I am totally devoted to my daughter . . . we don't have any babysitters either and no grandparents living nearby to help. Our daughter is either with us or her daycare provider, who loves her dearly and cried with me when we got her diagnosis a year ago.

Anyway, I don't want to ramble on but just wanted to say I appreciate another working mom stepping up and speaking out!!

And, Sweetwhite30, it is wonderful that you have the ability to be home with your children. Good luck with homeschooling.


Sandra
 

angelsmom

New member
Thanks Tammy for your post! I agree, I hate it that some people feel the need to make working moms feel bad for working and it is only compounded when there is a child with CF (or any other chronic condition) involved. Like you, I am totally devoted to my daughter . . . we don't have any babysitters either and no grandparents living nearby to help. Our daughter is either with us or her daycare provider, who loves her dearly and cried with me when we got her diagnosis a year ago.

Anyway, I don't want to ramble on but just wanted to say I appreciate another working mom stepping up and speaking out!!

And, Sweetwhite30, it is wonderful that you have the ability to be home with your children. Good luck with homeschooling.


Sandra
 

angelsmom

New member
Thanks Tammy for your post! I agree, I hate it that some people feel the need to make working moms feel bad for working and it is only compounded when there is a child with CF (or any other chronic condition) involved. Like you, I am totally devoted to my daughter . . . we don't have any babysitters either and no grandparents living nearby to help. Our daughter is either with us or her daycare provider, who loves her dearly and cried with me when we got her diagnosis a year ago.

Anyway, I don't want to ramble on but just wanted to say I appreciate another working mom stepping up and speaking out!!

And, Sweetwhite30, it is wonderful that you have the ability to be home with your children. Good luck with homeschooling.


Sandra
 

sweetwhite30

New member
Theres nothing wrong with people who have to work who have children with c.f. but i will say after all i read and all i have come to know, i think i did what is right for my son with c.f. A ounce of prevention is like a pound of cure. i have made many sacrifices due to i made the most money in my household but thats my decision and i wonder about it sometimes as anyone would. I love being a stay at home mommy . It works for my household and no one should look down on others for their decisions.
 

sweetwhite30

New member
Theres nothing wrong with people who have to work who have children with c.f. but i will say after all i read and all i have come to know, i think i did what is right for my son with c.f. A ounce of prevention is like a pound of cure. i have made many sacrifices due to i made the most money in my household but thats my decision and i wonder about it sometimes as anyone would. I love being a stay at home mommy . It works for my household and no one should look down on others for their decisions.
 

sweetwhite30

New member
Theres nothing wrong with people who have to work who have children with c.f. but i will say after all i read and all i have come to know, i think i did what is right for my son with c.f. A ounce of prevention is like a pound of cure. i have made many sacrifices due to i made the most money in my household but thats my decision and i wonder about it sometimes as anyone would. I love being a stay at home mommy . It works for my household and no one should look down on others for their decisions.
 
2

2perfectboys

Guest
Mary,
Glad to see he is potty trained and u r considering Preschool next year for socialization, he will do great
 
Top