"die quietly"

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AGirlCanDream

New member
ok...now not too many things that people say to me annoy or offend me too much but this one really does.

the other day i was in a meeting at work...something funny was said so suprise, suprise i start coughing! and i couldn't stop. i got up to excuse my self and my boss says "oh die quietly if you can". I know that people mean this to be funny...and most people dont say it to upset you but it REALLY does!!

am i just being way over sensitive?!
 
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Emily65Roses

New member
Different things offend individuals differently. That comment kind of annoys me, but it doesn't offend me or make me upset. However, I'm sure there are things that upset me that would slide right off your back (one that seriously tends to offend me almost every time is "have another cigarette" because I think smoking is disgusting and it pisses me off that people think that's why I'm coughing this hard at age 21... wouldn't I had to have been smoking since I was 2 to be this bad already from cigarettes???). If it offends you, then say something about it. Boss or not, that's kind of a rude thing to say to anyone (let alone someone with a <i>terminal</i> illness). He/she should know how offensive they are being to you. He/she has no right to make you feel that way, especially in a place where you work.
 
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anonymous

New member
Does your boss know that you have CF and that this is a terminal illness? If so, than i would have really taken that statement personal, and would have to agree that this needs brought to his attention. No one should be made to feel offended in the workplace

Kaitsmom<img src="i/expressions/rose.gif" border="0">
 
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AGirlCanDream

New member
well yeah actually my boss does know i have cf...mainly because i'm doing home iv's at the moment! so he knows because i have my line in and have to administer my iv's at lunch time. i think that's why it annoyed me so much more.

the smoking thing kind of annoys me...when people imply i'm a smoker...but i take that more as ignorance because its normally people i dont know. this time, because it was my boss, and because he knows i have cf, i was annoyed!
 
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anonymous

New member
have you told your boss that you have got CF because maybe people will understand why you cough but also you need to tuffen up a bit because you really shouldnt let people offend youand upset you that easily.
 
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luke

Guest
dreamgirl,

You have a right to be upset, if I was your friend and I heard it I probably would kick this guys arss right then and there. As an adult that has been discriminated against in the work place I will encourage you to let this be water off a ducks back. It seems that your employer knows that your sick and does try to accomodate you, that isn't all that common. I don't know your boss but maybe this is one instance where actions speak louder than words. Sure the comment was horrible but on the other hand he is understanding enough to let you go home to infuse. Of course, I don't know the particulars and maybe he lets you off because he has to and not his own free will, just trying to find the silver lining.


Good luck, stay strong, be healthy!


Luke
 
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serendipity730

New member
Sami,
No! You are definitely not being oversensitive! Heck, if that had been me, I would have been ready to hit him and burst into tears at the same time. I think that depending on how comfortable you feel with your boss (probably not much after that) I would let him know that his comment upset you. If you aren't comfortable speaking directly to your boss about this, maybe you could speak to a supervisor (if you have one) about it first. Unfortunately, people have to be taught not to make comments like that and don't know it innately. Good luck!
 
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anonymous

New member
DIE QUIETLY????
MAYBE YOU SHOULD TELL YOUR BOSS TO BE AN A**HOLE QUIETLY. WHAT A JERK. THAT IS SO UNPROFESSIONAL. THAT IS WAY NOT COOL!
 
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tessa55454

New member
You know..maybe the best way is to let it roll off your back, sure...after you suck the air out of his lungs. That is horrible. I wouldn't probably approach him about it, unless I still some minute respect for him, otherwise; personally in my head I would thin he is such a young, young soul, he has so much to learn yet. Karma, I am telling you.

To me that is no different than someone making fun of someone in a wheelchair or someone who is mentally challenged. That is horrible. COMPLETELY OUT OF LINE AND UNPROFESSIONAL. If it happends again, in some sort or fashion, if you do not feel comfortable confronting him about is ignorance and stupidity, go above him. He deserves to be put in check, if not by you, then let time play it's run.

I had an old boss of mine ask me, which this isn't near what this guy said to you, but he asked me how much longer I had left of school. I told him how much at that time, his response was..."you still have that much?" If it wasn't my boss, I sware I would have slapped. I had just gone through a really tough semester, and I was really close to be hospitalized a few times. I was lucky I was standing. Now granted he didn't know that, but you don't put down someone to put points on your low self-esteem chart.

What an afss...

I am so sorry. Screw him...he doesn't get it.

Take care of yourself...keep on rockin'

Tessa 27 w/cf
 
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anonymous

New member
One more thing, how old is this dude? What an idiot.

Maybe ahhh..you should get his email and we all might just drop him a friendly reminder on how to treat another human being...

Tessa 27 w/cf
 
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anonymous

New member
I say you have grounds for a discrimination lawsuit. What if he had made some equally belittling comment about your race or gender? Words such as those by their very nature create a hostile atmosphere in the workplace -- and that is against the law. You're not required to "live with it" or let it "run off your back." That the comment was "thoughtless" or "careless" doesn't make it acceptable. Sometimes we are obliged to think and care. Again, what do you think would happen if your boss treated a member of a racial minority to "thoughtless" racial insults?

Sue him.

Quoof
 
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JennaB

New member
I think that was a very crappy thing to be said. I mean, people are so stupid. He doesn't know your circumstances, and just to assume that it was a funny thing to say without even thinking shows what a total prick he is.
 
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anonymous

New member
Your boss is suppose to provide a safe workplace, I would say this is grounds for harrassment. If this is a company that he is just another employee (regardless of being "your boss" ) then I would seek a higher up to discuss this matter. This is "UNACCEPTABLE" by your boss and he will get what is coming. And as a father to a little girl with CF, I would light a fire in him myself if my little girl was told to go die quietly.
 
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snickers1228

New member
well first of all if ur boss knows that u have cf and he had the nerve to say something like that he is a total A**hole. maybe if he dont really know what actually goes along with having cf maybe if u get a couple of papers on it and have him read up on it......i know i was really offended when i worked at a cvs and i had to cough i steped away from the register to cough and came back i had a custmor yell out " i dont want that stuff u just coughed and i dont want ur sickness" i just felt like crying.... i had it done to me more then once...so i asked the boss to just put me on the floor and they told me no....so i had to leave the job...
 
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Emily65Roses

New member
Oh man... job or not, that customer would've gotten quite a piece of my mind, probably alongside some four-letter words. I hate ignorant people. Hate hate.
 
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anonymous

New member
snickers1228 that is horrible. All I have to say is karma. I am telling ya.. I am sorry you had to quit your job. Your boss wasn't very accomindating. Sometimes, not that I wish for people to fall ill or anything, but I would like to be humbled a bit. Step into another person shoes you know... That sux, I am really sorry. People are dumb.

Tessa 27 w/cf
 
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