How to tell girlfriend about CF?

Kelli

New member
I told my then boyfriend, now husband, early on in the relationship. I didn't want to get overly involved and 1.get my feelings hurt if he couldn't cope or 2.make him feel as if I tricked him or wasn't honest.

I think I just told him the basics (like no way I'd mention mucus, ewwwww). So I gave him a very brief overview.

He then took it upon himself to do some internet research and he (obviously) wanted to stay with me. But it's a hard topic to bring up. There's no easy way. So I'd be honest, be brief, and not to sugar coat things- but don't go into great detail.

And yes, I'd stay at home, so she doesn't feel weird if she sheds some tears and let her know it's ok to ask questions.

And good luck to you!! <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-smile.gif" border="0">

Kelli
31 f CF
 

Kelli

New member
I told my then boyfriend, now husband, early on in the relationship. I didn't want to get overly involved and 1.get my feelings hurt if he couldn't cope or 2.make him feel as if I tricked him or wasn't honest.

I think I just told him the basics (like no way I'd mention mucus, ewwwww). So I gave him a very brief overview.

He then took it upon himself to do some internet research and he (obviously) wanted to stay with me. But it's a hard topic to bring up. There's no easy way. So I'd be honest, be brief, and not to sugar coat things- but don't go into great detail.

And yes, I'd stay at home, so she doesn't feel weird if she sheds some tears and let her know it's ok to ask questions.

And good luck to you!! <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-smile.gif" border="0">

Kelli
31 f CF
 

Kelli

New member
I told my then boyfriend, now husband, early on in the relationship. I didn't want to get overly involved and 1.get my feelings hurt if he couldn't cope or 2.make him feel as if I tricked him or wasn't honest.

I think I just told him the basics (like no way I'd mention mucus, ewwwww). So I gave him a very brief overview.

He then took it upon himself to do some internet research and he (obviously) wanted to stay with me. But it's a hard topic to bring up. There's no easy way. So I'd be honest, be brief, and not to sugar coat things- but don't go into great detail.

And yes, I'd stay at home, so she doesn't feel weird if she sheds some tears and let her know it's ok to ask questions.

And good luck to you!! <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-smile.gif" border="0">

Kelli
31 f CF
 

Kelli

New member
I told my then boyfriend, now husband, early on in the relationship. I didn't want to get overly involved and 1.get my feelings hurt if he couldn't cope or 2.make him feel as if I tricked him or wasn't honest.

I think I just told him the basics (like no way I'd mention mucus, ewwwww). So I gave him a very brief overview.

He then took it upon himself to do some internet research and he (obviously) wanted to stay with me. But it's a hard topic to bring up. There's no easy way. So I'd be honest, be brief, and not to sugar coat things- but don't go into great detail.

And yes, I'd stay at home, so she doesn't feel weird if she sheds some tears and let her know it's ok to ask questions.

And good luck to you!! <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-smile.gif" border="0">

Kelli
31 f CF
 

Kelli

New member
I told my then boyfriend, now husband, early on in the relationship. I didn't want to get overly involved and 1.get my feelings hurt if he couldn't cope or 2.make him feel as if I tricked him or wasn't honest.
<br />
<br />I think I just told him the basics (like no way I'd mention mucus, ewwwww). So I gave him a very brief overview.
<br />
<br />He then took it upon himself to do some internet research and he (obviously) wanted to stay with me. But it's a hard topic to bring up. There's no easy way. So I'd be honest, be brief, and not to sugar coat things- but don't go into great detail.
<br />
<br />And yes, I'd stay at home, so she doesn't feel weird if she sheds some tears and let her know it's ok to ask questions.
<br />
<br />And good luck to you!! <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-smile.gif" border="0">
<br />
<br />Kelli
<br />31 f CF
 

bagged2drag

Active member
Kelli's advice is pretty good. Short, to the point, and don't overindulge information. It is a lot to grasp, even for someone such as us- who have the disease. I usually let someone know that I have some "health problems" first, then go to the details incrementally. This is a less burdensome way than saying to someone " I have a disease..." The latter line will definitely put someone on high alert, causing some less than rational decision without the thought process kicking in lol.

I have been with my girlfriend for over 3 years now, she knows a lot about my disease; she knows the seriousness of it, but she still doesn't know everything there is to learn about it. Time may change that, but if it doesn't, as long as she is accepting of the consequences and of what she does know, it is ok. Like Kelli said, don't butter it up, but dont downplay it either. If you want it to last, give her some info, and urge her to ask YOU any questions if she so desires to. Finding out from you will be much more easing than finding out from a third party.

I always make it a point to bring up the health problems in casual conversation rather than a specific sit down session-doesn't matter who I am telling it to. This will make the situation much easier on both of you IMO.

good luck <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-smile.gif" border="0">
 

bagged2drag

Active member
Kelli's advice is pretty good. Short, to the point, and don't overindulge information. It is a lot to grasp, even for someone such as us- who have the disease. I usually let someone know that I have some "health problems" first, then go to the details incrementally. This is a less burdensome way than saying to someone " I have a disease..." The latter line will definitely put someone on high alert, causing some less than rational decision without the thought process kicking in lol.

I have been with my girlfriend for over 3 years now, she knows a lot about my disease; she knows the seriousness of it, but she still doesn't know everything there is to learn about it. Time may change that, but if it doesn't, as long as she is accepting of the consequences and of what she does know, it is ok. Like Kelli said, don't butter it up, but dont downplay it either. If you want it to last, give her some info, and urge her to ask YOU any questions if she so desires to. Finding out from you will be much more easing than finding out from a third party.

I always make it a point to bring up the health problems in casual conversation rather than a specific sit down session-doesn't matter who I am telling it to. This will make the situation much easier on both of you IMO.

good luck <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-smile.gif" border="0">
 

bagged2drag

Active member
Kelli's advice is pretty good. Short, to the point, and don't overindulge information. It is a lot to grasp, even for someone such as us- who have the disease. I usually let someone know that I have some "health problems" first, then go to the details incrementally. This is a less burdensome way than saying to someone " I have a disease..." The latter line will definitely put someone on high alert, causing some less than rational decision without the thought process kicking in lol.

I have been with my girlfriend for over 3 years now, she knows a lot about my disease; she knows the seriousness of it, but she still doesn't know everything there is to learn about it. Time may change that, but if it doesn't, as long as she is accepting of the consequences and of what she does know, it is ok. Like Kelli said, don't butter it up, but dont downplay it either. If you want it to last, give her some info, and urge her to ask YOU any questions if she so desires to. Finding out from you will be much more easing than finding out from a third party.

I always make it a point to bring up the health problems in casual conversation rather than a specific sit down session-doesn't matter who I am telling it to. This will make the situation much easier on both of you IMO.

good luck <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-smile.gif" border="0">
 

bagged2drag

Active member
Kelli's advice is pretty good. Short, to the point, and don't overindulge information. It is a lot to grasp, even for someone such as us- who have the disease. I usually let someone know that I have some "health problems" first, then go to the details incrementally. This is a less burdensome way than saying to someone " I have a disease..." The latter line will definitely put someone on high alert, causing some less than rational decision without the thought process kicking in lol.

I have been with my girlfriend for over 3 years now, she knows a lot about my disease; she knows the seriousness of it, but she still doesn't know everything there is to learn about it. Time may change that, but if it doesn't, as long as she is accepting of the consequences and of what she does know, it is ok. Like Kelli said, don't butter it up, but dont downplay it either. If you want it to last, give her some info, and urge her to ask YOU any questions if she so desires to. Finding out from you will be much more easing than finding out from a third party.

I always make it a point to bring up the health problems in casual conversation rather than a specific sit down session-doesn't matter who I am telling it to. This will make the situation much easier on both of you IMO.

good luck <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-smile.gif" border="0">
 

bagged2drag

Active member
Kelli's advice is pretty good. Short, to the point, and don't overindulge information. It is a lot to grasp, even for someone such as us- who have the disease. I usually let someone know that I have some "health problems" first, then go to the details incrementally. This is a less burdensome way than saying to someone " I have a disease..." The latter line will definitely put someone on high alert, causing some less than rational decision without the thought process kicking in lol.
<br />
<br />I have been with my girlfriend for over 3 years now, she knows a lot about my disease; she knows the seriousness of it, but she still doesn't know everything there is to learn about it. Time may change that, but if it doesn't, as long as she is accepting of the consequences and of what she does know, it is ok. Like Kelli said, don't butter it up, but dont downplay it either. If you want it to last, give her some info, and urge her to ask YOU any questions if she so desires to. Finding out from you will be much more easing than finding out from a third party.
<br />
<br />I always make it a point to bring up the health problems in casual conversation rather than a specific sit down session-doesn't matter who I am telling it to. This will make the situation much easier on both of you IMO.
<br />
<br />good luck <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-smile.gif" border="0">
 

Jeana

New member
What I think might be an easier way to break it to her is to use an inhaler in front of her. She'll ask you about it and you share. I didn't tell my husband about it all in one chunk when we first started dating. I know I downplayed it, but I don't think I was honest with myself about how CF would impact my life.

Anyway, it's better to be honest and straightforward about it and let your positive attitude show. If you make it sound like a death sentence, that'll put a stop to the relationship. But if you make it sound like a challenge that you're not letting keep you down, she'll probably respect you more for it.

Let us know how it goes. Lots of luck! <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-smile.gif" border="0">
 

Jeana

New member
What I think might be an easier way to break it to her is to use an inhaler in front of her. She'll ask you about it and you share. I didn't tell my husband about it all in one chunk when we first started dating. I know I downplayed it, but I don't think I was honest with myself about how CF would impact my life.

Anyway, it's better to be honest and straightforward about it and let your positive attitude show. If you make it sound like a death sentence, that'll put a stop to the relationship. But if you make it sound like a challenge that you're not letting keep you down, she'll probably respect you more for it.

Let us know how it goes. Lots of luck! <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-smile.gif" border="0">
 

Jeana

New member
What I think might be an easier way to break it to her is to use an inhaler in front of her. She'll ask you about it and you share. I didn't tell my husband about it all in one chunk when we first started dating. I know I downplayed it, but I don't think I was honest with myself about how CF would impact my life.

Anyway, it's better to be honest and straightforward about it and let your positive attitude show. If you make it sound like a death sentence, that'll put a stop to the relationship. But if you make it sound like a challenge that you're not letting keep you down, she'll probably respect you more for it.

Let us know how it goes. Lots of luck! <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-smile.gif" border="0">
 

Jeana

New member
What I think might be an easier way to break it to her is to use an inhaler in front of her. She'll ask you about it and you share. I didn't tell my husband about it all in one chunk when we first started dating. I know I downplayed it, but I don't think I was honest with myself about how CF would impact my life.

Anyway, it's better to be honest and straightforward about it and let your positive attitude show. If you make it sound like a death sentence, that'll put a stop to the relationship. But if you make it sound like a challenge that you're not letting keep you down, she'll probably respect you more for it.

Let us know how it goes. Lots of luck! <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-smile.gif" border="0">
 

Jeana

New member
What I think might be an easier way to break it to her is to use an inhaler in front of her. She'll ask you about it and you share. I didn't tell my husband about it all in one chunk when we first started dating. I know I downplayed it, but I don't think I was honest with myself about how CF would impact my life.
<br />
<br />Anyway, it's better to be honest and straightforward about it and let your positive attitude show. If you make it sound like a death sentence, that'll put a stop to the relationship. But if you make it sound like a challenge that you're not letting keep you down, she'll probably respect you more for it.
<br />
<br />Let us know how it goes. Lots of luck! <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-smile.gif" border="0">
<br />
<br />
<br />
 
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