I lost my sister to CF less than a year ago. I can say that the first post that erupted such a controversy touched me in a hard way. I would do anything to have my sister back & hurt over time wasted on stress and worry. But it is not fair for anyone, CF or not, to judge the coping of another. We are all here because CF is a part of our lives in some way. Just as I am grieving for the death of my sister, others are grieving because dreams they have about their children, their own lives, etc. are not going as they hoped. Grief is a process and part of that process is anger. We all have to be a safe sounding board for those to work through that process. My sister harbored a ton of anger in her life because she couldn't do the things that others did and it often put a wedge between her and those that cared about her. Please try to work through making the same mistake. The night before she went on the ventillator, I stayed at the hospital with her. During the wee hours of the morning, I was doing my best to do anything she needed. She was on a C-pap that covered her whole face and could hardly breathe if we removed it, even to take a drink of water. Her patience was very thin and she got very angry with me several times. I would've probably behaved the exact same way. No fault there, but those moments were some of our last ones together and my patience was also thin due to exhaustion and grief about what I thought was happening. It hurts immensely when I think about those last hours and what I think about even more is all the other time we had together that we didn't take advantage of to the fullest. I know that the survivors on this site are often resistant to hearing from those of us who have lost the battle, but please learn from the mistakes we've made. We can't change them, but you can.
