I TRIED TO STAY CALM

[Seana30]

Well......I have taken the advice of some of the CFers on this site, and have allowed Courtney to be more responsible for her health.

I did not go at the beginning of the school year to talk to her teachers, and told her if she felt they needed to know she needed to discuss it with them (unless she asked for my help of course).

Courtney ALWAYS wears a light jacket. She is always cold and I am assuming it is because she is so skinny and her temp normally runs in about 97.

Well......she comes home the other day and she is pretty upset. The new assistant principle came up to her in the lunch room and yelled at her. The school has this new STUPID rule that the kids can not have theirs jackets zipped up in the school. This principal told her she was going to have to go to detention because of this. Courtney tried to exaplain to her why it was zipped but she wouldn't let Courtney talk.

Needless to say I was in her office the next morning. I ask her if she remembered what happen in the lunch room. She said "I would need to see her to remember it". Fine, pull her out of class. Once Courtney got to the office the principle STARTED LECTURING COURTNEY AGAIN! I said "Did you get a good look at her, do you remember her now?" Once she said yes I told Courtney to go back to class. I then proceeded to chew her butt out. I told her she should know peoples situations before she acts out, and should let the kids explain themselves.

ANYHOO..........I am mad at myself for getting upset. I said I was going to walk in there and educate her on Courtney's situation and instead I went off on her. She just really pissed me off when she started lecturing Courtney with me right there.

I wish I would have kept my cool but sometimes I get SOOO protective of Courtney because of her illness.

Seana

 

[Emily65Roses]

Don't get mad, I would've told the b*tch off too. Did she lay the effffff off after you explained the situation? I hope so, because I don't feel like traveling again to kick someone ELSE'S butt. *sigh* I'm so tired of doing that. <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-smile.gif" border="0">

 

[thelizardqueen]

I can think back to one time in school when my mum just reemed a teacher out for me. Like my mum just went off on this woman. Back when I was in elementary, the school was told about my Cf, blah blah blah, and they were also told that when I have to go to the bathroom, I have to go - there's no waiting for permission or anything. Well this one teacher decided that she knew better and wouldn't let me go to the washroom when I needed to (and all us CFers know that when you have to do #2 - you HAVE to go). My mum just flipped on this teacher. So I can completly understand you telling the principal off.

 

[anonymous]

Go Seana! She sounded pretty unreasonable. She had a chance to listen when Courtney tried to give her an explanation. Then she had a second chance to listen when you tried to give her an explanation. I'm curious as to what was her reaction? And what's with the no zippering your coat rule? They think they're hiding something in there?

 

[Emily65Roses]

Psh, of course. Everyone knows that 13 year old girls like to hide 5 pound bags of heroin in their jackets. DUHHHHHHH.

*bashes head against the wall*

 

[anonymous]

Ahhh, that was me Amber, forgot to sign in AGAIN!

 

[anonymous]

She could have just shown her, "Look, see, no heroin." Then the assistant principal could have let her go on her way. J/K

Instead of the asst. principal you can call her ASS. PRINCIPLE
Ha ha

 

[dyza]

Why does the school have a rule that you must not zip up a jacket indoors in the first place?
If that is an example of that principals rules and regulations, then that principal is trully an a$$.

Incidently my wife would have knocked her out for doing that.

 

[mellimoo91]

LOL i remember a similar thing happened to me when i was just
starting high school. it was like the first week of school and I
accidently left my jacket in the classroom after the bell. My
teacher confiscated it and wouldn't give it back to me until the
next day! Despite the fact that I went at lunchtime and asked for
him to return it he told me that I shouldn't have left it in the
classroom in the first place!!!! Needless to say my mum went off at
him, so don't feel bad. Hehe she did the same thing.

 

[blindhearted]

Dont feel bad about it. if I wote to you all the times that my dad went off on my school principle/teacher/school board then I would lock the forms up from an overload. So many things happened. I was written up for taking some medicine (lucky I had a note in my perment file from a doctor stating I knew how to take my medicine), once put into a bathroom (on a couch) for my nurse to give me CPT (my dad told the school board he would sue for endangering my health by placing me in a bathroom), later moved to the floor (then couch) of the teacher's lounge (once again went to the school board...then this was fixed by getting a medical couch and being placed behind a cubical in the challenged/handycap children's room (when they went outside or to lunch), it was the only option, at least it was more private and not on the floor), one teacher almost failed me because I couldnt attend her class (history) like she thought I should (even though I was medically taken out by a doctor), but I had to attend another teacher's class (due to the difficult of teaching the subject matter, geometry, at home...this one class was ok by the doc), among many, many more problems. A lot of adults, specially ones with authority, dont listen to children reguardless of their problems and many dont believe the child (I have had this happen as well) even if they can explain it. So my parents had to do a lot of the fighting for me. My school and teachers were always aware of my CF, it was told on the first day of every school year, but problems still arised. So my parents told me to handle what I could, but if I started to have problems with anyone, specially adults, to come to them and I did.

 

[kayleesgrandma]

Way to go Mom!!! I hate it when adults are rude to children! What kind of example do they think they are presenting?! I've marched into school over something with my kids also. Though of course it's more serious with cf. Then I would have REALLY gone off! You did good mama bear!

 

[Jane]

<div class="FTQUOTE"><begin quote><i>Originally posted by: <b>dyza</b></i>

Why does the school have a rule that you must not zip up a jacket indoors in the first place?<div class="FTQUOTE"><begin quote>



Kids hide all kinds of things in their jackets...Assault rifles, Weapons of mass destruction...Osama Bin Laden...like Emily said, 5 pounds of heroin. LOL NEW Assistant Principals are the worst. They want to start out being mean so kids are scared of them. GO SEANA!

We went through that in our town too-no coats in school. It actually had to do more with electronic equipment (cell phones, CD players, Ipods), cigarettes and spray paint.

Josh always wears a sweatshirt too, usually a hoodie...adds 10 pounds.

 

[anonymous]

I had a counsler once that wouldn't leave me alone and my mom did the same thing. Went off on her. Sometimes people only understand you and listen when you <b>MAKE'EM</b>. Later on in high school I usually just got p****d off and threw a chair at someone when they crossed me. And if I had to go to the restroom...I went without asking first. I hated school because of teachers and principals like the one you dealt with so I think what you did was great. <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-cool.gif" border="0">

 

[DEES4]

Seana,
I dont blame you at all....I would have done the same thing. We all know how it is when it comes to our children.
By the way......My 15 year old son passed by the computer while I was reading your post and saw the picture of Courtney....he said "wow she's hot!!" LOL I just had to tell you that. She is really a beauty.
Carrie
Mom To
Daniel (no cf)
Emily (no cf)
Ethan (no cf)
Sawyer (cf)

 

[coltsfan715]

We had a handful of similar instances when I was in school also. The worst for me was my sophomore year of high school. I would always get a note from my doc for my phys ed. class - basically the note would say I had CF and there would be some days that participating might be difficult for me and the teacher should take my word on whether or not I could participate and leave it at that. Well I had given this note to my teacher and hadn't had to use it for the whole year come November. Well in November I had caught a cold and was hoping to get over it without going in the hospital. I went to class one afternoon and had forgotten to bring sweatpants and a long sleeve shirt to change for P.E. I told the teacher I hadn't been feeling good and I preferred to stay inside that day because I was sick and it was raining and cold outside and I didn't have warm enough clothes. She berated me and told me that if I didn't change and go outside she was writing me a referal. Well at the time I was somewhat shy and somewhat backward so instead of standing up for myself I just changed into my shorts and short sleeve shirt and went outside and sat in the rain like the rest of the class. Then I looked down and noticed my fingernails were turning purplish/blue. At that point I said screw it I am going inside, so I got up and walked inside. I just sat there I didn't do anything but sit there - then she comes in and starts berating me again and I tried explaining to her to no avail. I was told she even called me a b!tc# as I was walking away, but I was not fortunate enough to hear it - a friend of mine did.

Point to that story ... I was at the doc and being admitted to the hospital the very next morning. I had not told my parents at first, but they were driving me nuts about why I had gotten SOOOO sick sooo quickly. I finally told them, and my dad about went postal. He gathered up every medical thing they had taken to the school and then some and went to the school - marched in and demanded the principal. He ripped into the principal telling him that if something wasn't done about this teacher that he was going to the school board and not only would her job be in jeopardy so would his. I ended up never going back to her class. My teachers decided collectively it was the best choice and that I could write a paper on CF and that would give me a passing grade for P.E.

I just wanted to show that sometimes even preparing the teachers and making them aware of the situation doesn't help anything. I can understand your wanting to remain calm, but I probably would have lost my cool in the same situation. Sometimes principals and teachers feel the need to constantly make a child know "who the boss is" even when a child isn't trying to do anything wrong, they are just trying to take care of themselves. Sometimes they (teachers/principals) automatically assume the worst. I hope you are able to get things worked out and that you don't have another encounter with that ass.princ.

Take Care,
Lindsey

 

[EnergyGal]

Seana

I would have done the same exact thing. I am not sure about yelling but I have never been a Mother so I cannot say what I would have done. At least hear the child speak her peace before humiliating them in front of a classroom. That principal should be ashammed of herself. I hope she feels very guilty. I think she should apologize to your daughter if she has any class.

I hope you feel better Seanna and do not think twice about your actions. Remember your intentions were out of love and protection for your daughter.

 

[anonymous]

We should all take our experiences with CF and write one huge article to educate school staff and also remind them of how degrading it can be when our supposed role models treat a person like this<img src="i/expressions/brokenheart.gif" border="0">.....2998 members here if I'm right. Might be a wake up call to schools it's sent too such as this one, especially if we all signed it.....kind of like a petition. Or maybe that's a stupid idea, just thinking out loud<img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-wink.gif" border="0">

 

[Seana30]

First......thank you all for the responses. It is nice to hear I am not the only parent who has gone off on the school.

Second....YOU GUYS CRACK ME UP! I can picture kids walking around with 5 pound bags of herion in their jackets.....lol.

Their reasoning for the no jackets zipped up policy is so they can see that the kids shirts are tucked in. They wear school uniforms and they must have their shirts tucked in at all times. Stupid, I know!

Emily, you are so sweet! I think we need to get a "emily flight fund" together so you do not need to pay for airplane tickets when we need you to come kick someones butt.....lol.

Carrie, THANK YOU! I think Courtney is SO pretty. I read her your post and she smiled and giggled. She will be turning 14 in a few weeks and boys are becoming quite important. You know how that goes with teenagers!

Thank you all for responding. I really have tried to listen to the CFers here and let Courtney be more independent with her illness, but when someone messes with her, it is very hard for me to sit quietly!

Seana

 

[EnergyGal]

That is a great idea or just simply call the media and see if you can get them to interview principals and their rules. Something needs to be done. I wonder though when the kids in her school find out will they embrace her or make fun of her? That is the most important thought I would consider first.

 

[ejwiegert]

I like RIsa's idea of calling the media and having a discussion with them about it. If you have a good relationship with the principal/dean/headmaster of the school, I would talk to him/her about it first before going to the media and having Courtney put in the middle of a showdown. I DO think that maybe it is time for you to bring in a medical professional and have a meeting with ALL principals, her teachers, and other faculty/staff that come into direct contact with her so her specific needs can be addressed. If you have a willing pediatrician, that might be the way to go. You could also have a 504 drawn up as mentioned in one of the other posts. It protects your child's rights since there are special circumstances surrounding her needs. There is a post about 504s somewhere online.

I'm glad you stood up for your child. Too many parents just let the kids deal with adminstrative injustices and assume that the child is in the wrong because the administration is the authority. Coming from teaching high school, I'm all too aware of brow-beaten kids.

Em