I wonder something

S

Swedishstar84

Banned
Hello everyone!I wonder something. I met a girl (cfer) at the childrens hospital many years ago and we became friends. later she got b cepacia. And i was not allowed to visit her anymore. But we have keep in contact over the years by phone and sms. But it has now been 1-2 yrs since i heard from her.i have called her and sent sms but no answer . I know she is alive ( because i use to. Chatt with her sister. ) but the only thing she Saying is " she be happy i tell u said hello" i am glad she be happy. I can understand if she not want to have comtact with any cfer but why don t she tell me. Have this happend to you? What Did you do about it? Should i still send her sms ? Thank you <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-smile.gif" border="0"><br>Sorry i take this subject up but needed to write.<br>Hugs
 
S

Swedishstar84

Banned
Hello everyone!I wonder something. I met a girl (cfer) at the childrens hospital many years ago and we became friends. later she got b cepacia. And i was not allowed to visit her anymore. But we have keep in contact over the years by phone and sms. But it has now been 1-2 yrs since i heard from her.i have called her and sent sms but no answer . I know she is alive ( because i use to. Chatt with her sister. ) but the only thing she Saying is " she be happy i tell u said hello" i am glad she be happy. I can understand if she not want to have comtact with any cfer but why don t she tell me. Have this happend to you? What Did you do about it? Should i still send her sms ? Thank you <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-smile.gif" border="0"><br>Sorry i take this subject up but needed to write.<br>Hugs
 
B

beleache

New member
Hi Marie,<br>I have had situations , not with CFers though, where ppl stop "talking" to me for whatever reason.. I know this can be frustrating ..<br>I would contact her sister & tell her how you feel.. Ask her if she knows if anything upset her sister or if she knows anything .. <br>Hope you get somewhere.. <3 joni
 
B

beleache

New member
Hi Marie,<br>I have had situations , not with CFers though, where ppl stop "talking" to me for whatever reason.. I know this can be frustrating ..<br>I would contact her sister & tell her how you feel.. Ask her if she knows if anything upset her sister or if she knows anything .. <br>Hope you get somewhere.. <3 joni
 
T

tesorotiffa

New member
Not to be blunt or anything, but if people suddenly stop talking to you for some unknown reason, maybe you should just accept that and move on.
 
T

tesorotiffa

New member
Not to be blunt or anything, but if people suddenly stop talking to you for some unknown reason, maybe you should just accept that and move on.
 
I

Iamqueenofeverything

New member
all you can do is reach out to her and ask any way you can why she stopped talking to you. you can ask by text, email, calling or sending out a letter. if she doesn't respond, move on.
i had someone stop talking to me for a reason i do not know. i have tried all the things i have told you can do. she never responded. it hurt me greatly but eventually i moved on after i said a little prayer for her.
if someone doesn't tell you what you did, you can never fix the problem. when someone doesn't answer you about the relationship issues then that speaks volumes of them being immature and a coward. do you want a friend who is unwilling to speak to you about things?
 
I

Iamqueenofeverything

New member
all you can do is reach out to her and ask any way you can why she stopped talking to you. you can ask by text, email, calling or sending out a letter. if she doesn't respond, move on.
i had someone stop talking to me for a reason i do not know. i have tried all the things i have told you can do. she never responded. it hurt me greatly but eventually i moved on after i said a little prayer for her.
if someone doesn't tell you what you did, you can never fix the problem. when someone doesn't answer you about the relationship issues then that speaks volumes of them being immature and a coward. do you want a friend who is unwilling to speak to you about things?
 
L

LouLou

New member
I do suggest asking why she has stopped talking to you as suggested as it might just be that she hasn't made the time. If she doesn't get back to you it is likely because of something you can't do anything about and also likely you had nothing really to do with (ie. maybe her disease has progressed further and she's jealous of you). For example, I have a childhood friend, one who was in my wedding even, she has not talked to me since I had a child. She is a beautiful successful lawyer but does not have a spouse or a child. She had one failed engagement. I suspect she longs to have a child and speaking to me, someone she perhaps never thought would be able to have a child, pains her. She also had an abortion (during college)and I know is pained by memories of what could have been, etc. I have not asked her if I did anything but I am tempted to because I waste a lot of time thinking of her and wishing we were in touch. I love her :-(
 
L

LouLou

New member
I do suggest asking why she has stopped talking to you as suggested as it might just be that she hasn't made the time. If she doesn't get back to you it is likely because of something you can't do anything about and also likely you had nothing really to do with (ie. maybe her disease has progressed further and she's jealous of you). For example, I have a childhood friend, one who was in my wedding even, she has not talked to me since I had a child. She is a beautiful successful lawyer but does not have a spouse or a child. She had one failed engagement. I suspect she longs to have a child and speaking to me, someone she perhaps never thought would be able to have a child, pains her. She also had an abortion (during college)and I know is pained by memories of what could have been, etc. I have not asked her if I did anything but I am tempted to because I waste a lot of time thinking of her and wishing we were in touch. I love her :-(
 
M

mamaScarlett

Active member
It might be for a particular reason like some pp's have said. In that case reaching out would be a good idea. Why not? I know its uncomfortable, but really what have you got to lose?<br>It also might just be the craziness of life that has kept her from being in touch. In the past year I know I definitely haven't been the best 'friend' to anyone. Illness, adjusting to life with 2 kids, being up all night and exhausted-are all reasons why I just have to delegate my time. There are times where I have time for friends and a social life and times where just taking care of my CF, my kids and my home are at the maximum of what I can do. I want to do more, or reach out more, but I just can't. <br>Maybe she's going through a time like that and you just aren't aware of it. Maybe she's depressed and reaching out is hard for you. But if you don't try, you'll never know. Why not.<br>
 
M

mamaScarlett

Active member
It might be for a particular reason like some pp's have said. In that case reaching out would be a good idea. Why not? I know its uncomfortable, but really what have you got to lose?<br>It also might just be the craziness of life that has kept her from being in touch. In the past year I know I definitely haven't been the best 'friend' to anyone. Illness, adjusting to life with 2 kids, being up all night and exhausted-are all reasons why I just have to delegate my time. There are times where I have time for friends and a social life and times where just taking care of my CF, my kids and my home are at the maximum of what I can do. I want to do more, or reach out more, but I just can't. <br>Maybe she's going through a time like that and you just aren't aware of it. Maybe she's depressed and reaching out is hard for you. But if you don't try, you'll never know. Why not.<br>
 
J

jamoncita

New member
i've had a similar experience. a friend of mine gave me the number of a guy with cf who said he was willing to talk. we emailed for a while, but eventually he began to complain of the effort it took. he suggested meeting up some time since we live very close by, but i haven't heard from him since. he once mentioned that he suffered from depression and didn't feel like socializing, so i take that and the complaints about emailing each other as a clear sign that he didn't want to make the effort to talk more.
i suggest you stop trying to contact the girl as she is clearly not interested in chatting any more. there are plenty of other people willing to chat with you! best of luck in making new cf friends <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-smile.gif" border="0">
 
J

jamoncita

New member
i've had a similar experience. a friend of mine gave me the number of a guy with cf who said he was willing to talk. we emailed for a while, but eventually he began to complain of the effort it took. he suggested meeting up some time since we live very close by, but i haven't heard from him since. he once mentioned that he suffered from depression and didn't feel like socializing, so i take that and the complaints about emailing each other as a clear sign that he didn't want to make the effort to talk more.
i suggest you stop trying to contact the girl as she is clearly not interested in chatting any more. there are plenty of other people willing to chat with you! best of luck in making new cf friends <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-smile.gif" border="0">
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Top