In a Total Rut...

Lilith

New member
Normally, I don't vent on this forum, and I'm not even sure why I'm doing it now. Maybe I'm just looking for feedback on how you guys de-stress, because I could use some ideas.

First off, I went into clinc the other day for the results of my tyroid test. Originally, my doc thought my heart rate was a little high and due to Grave's disease running in my family, he thought it might be because of my thyroid. They ran two tests---one was positive, the other was totally negative. The doc seems to think that the first one came back funky because I had a little flare-up of staph going on.

The good news; I don't have Grave's. The bad news? My heart is screwed up. My doc said the normal heart rate range for a 20-year-old is 70-80. Mine is up in the 120's-130's. UGH!! He said I have the normal heart rate of a 7-year-old... Therefore, he thinks that my heart may actually be undersized, and it could be just as simple as taking yet ANOTHER PILL to slow it down! I go for a heart echo either this Thursday or next. Why is it all my vital organs that are screwing up!? Lungs, heart...why can't it be something stupid, like my vagina or something?!

To top it off, my boyfriend's insurance just hiked up to an ungodly amount of money over an accident he had over a year ago. He doesn't make a whole lot of money, and this hike could kill him. His vehicle is financed, so he has to have a certain amount of coverage. The woman at State Farm told him that if he increased his deductable, the rate would lower dramatically. She also said she'd call him on Monday. Well, here it is Tuesday, and she hasn't responded. He tried calling her, but she was too busy and said she'd get back to him. More BS. So here we both are, on pins and needles, with nothing to go on. I guess all insurance companies, health or otherwise, suck @$$.

We got into a big fight last night, too, over something totally unrelated. Rick works for my father on the weekends, and something stupid happened that was out of his control. Dad ranted to me about it for about an hour yesterday, saying that Rick isn't motivated, blah, blah, blah. It wasn't even that big of an issue, but my dad likes to blow things out of proportion when he's in a bad mood. It wasn't an issue of Rick being motivated or not, but still, dad asked me the question, "What motivates him?" I couldn't answer. I've known Rick for nearly 10 years, been dating him for 5, and I couldn't answer a simple question like that. We hardly talk about important things, and I called him out on it after he got off of work. That turned into a huge blow-up, and we ended up fighting over the phone for an hour before we resolved the issue.

He said he doesn't open up to me because he doesn't want to put added stress on me, which I can understand, but communication is key in any relationship! It just seems sad to me that I don't even know my lover of 5 years as I should... But we hardly have time to go into in-depth conversations. His home life is in shambles (I can't stand his family, and neither can he), and he works most of the time just to keep up with his bills. He'll be moving into his own apartment in July, but until then, things are going to continue to suck for us. And if this insurance thing gets in the way, he won't be getting the apartment, either...

I can tell all of this added stress is wearing me down. Could have something to do with my heart being all funky, as well. Most mornings I don't even have the energy to take a shower. I have to drag myself in there, and drag myself out. Forget about my therapies. The last time I did my meds was on Saturday morning. I don't have the motivation or the engery to do them. And you're probably saying, "Well, if you don't get off your dead @$$ and do them, of course you won't have the energy!" But when I'm in that state of mind, hacking my head off due to hypertonic saline, getting an even bigger headache, and having to mess with using needles for my colistin...just the thoughts wear me out.

I have so many things I want to do (i.e. finishing my home college courses, working on the tattoos I'm supposed to be designing for my family, doing the artworks that I have on my list), but I don't have the mindset or will to do any of them.

So in short, my body's falling apart (even more than usual), and my normal life in general is so complicated that I feel like just going outside and laying in the spa until my skin falls off. Blah...it's just one of those times where I'm tired of living, you know? Not suicidal, but just...tired of getting up in the morning.

This isn't a 'pity me' thread, I just wanted to give you some background before I ask...what do you do to motivate yourself and get your life going when all you want to do is just stay in bed all day? What de-stresses you?

P.S. I don't have a car yet, so I'm limited as to what I can do...before anyone asks... Thanks for any feedback, guys.

P.P.S. Anyone who manages to read this whole thing gets a virtual <img src="i/expressions/beer.gif" border="0">
 

TCNJcystic

New member
Yay, I get a virtual beer, which is the closest I've gotten to the real thing since I've been home from college.

I can sympathize with you on being too lazy to do therapies. When I'm at school I hardly do them like I'm supposed to, and I feel terribly about it. I just have too much to do in real life to be worrying so much about therapies, so it's usally a watered down version each day and that's it. When I get into that habbit though, I try to pick myself up by looking at the future. I really want to have children, and whenever I start slacking off, I wonder what my children are going to think of me knowing that I didn't try my absolute hardest to stick around for them.

In terms of real life gettin' you down, I'd say just try your hardest to stick it to the man. He's holdin ya back. Stick it to him. That's the best I got.

I hope you work through things and feel better!
 

JazzysMom

New member
Let me start with your heart rate....is it possible that since you havent been doing your treatments faithfully that your heart rate is up from it having to work since your lungs are full of crap? A thought...

As far as the stress in general....I usually need a good cry &/or screaming match at me, myself & I or a stuffed animal. I need to physically vent somehow. I have often stood in the shower crying until the hot water was gone.

The only other thing that works for me is good hug. My husbands hugs are like miracle cures & my daughters is just loving. I dont have much else to tell you except it will all work out with time. Until then ***hug***
 

Lilith

New member
Steve, it's good to know I'm not the only 'slacker' as far as my treatments go. I know what you mean about focusing on the future, but as for the immediate future, it seems rather bleak... But I do love sticking it to the man. ^_^

Melissa, you have a point about the heart rate. But I'm not sure my lungs are congested enough to make that big of a difference. It could be the case, though. I'll bring it up to my doc. And yes, screaming/crying is something I usually do for relief, though after that point, I usually just go sort of 'numb' and wallow for a while. Hopefully, as you said, time will work most of this out. And thanks for the hug!
 

JennifersHope

New member
Just wanted to give you a cyber hug.. The only way I destress is to talk and vent about it, then things seem to be better.

Hope you feel better.

Jennifer
 

Lilith

New member
Thanks for the cyber hug, Jennifer. Maybe I'll try talking about this with my friend Sarah...whenever she gets off of work ^_^;;
 

kybert

New member
i wish my heart problems got taken that seriously. i too have a really high resting heart rate and i have flutters on top of that. i ended up seeing the gp and telling the cf doc about my heart problems. the gp said its harmless and the cf doc ignored me!
 

anonymous

New member
Hi,
I can understand that one doesn´t do all the therapies sometimes, but: if its antibiotics like collistin, you can easily get resistant germs, if you don´t do it on a regular basis, so you should be careful with that!!!

Uli,43,Germany
 
6

65rosessamurai

Guest
Hey Lilith!
I suppose Bob, your purple dragon isn't feeling well, either, huh?
As for your relationship, I can relate to how you must feel. Half the reason for my divorce is I was married to a total stranger after ten years of marriage. The thing was, she always discussed (actually argued) about all of my shortcomings, and never discussed hers (maybe cause she was too perfect), so I considered it as an important part of the relationship which was irreperable in conclusion. I would suggest, sometime when you finally have the "bravery" to have a "Come to Jesus Talk" (no offense to religion, that was a frequently used phrase from my sister and brother-in-law) with your long-term boyfriend, and hope to get a lot of things resolved, and hopefully cut down on the stress between you two.
As for the insurance with State Farm, I had State Farm insurance 12 years back, and after a few years, I had suddenly found out they made a big mistake with the automobile records and gave me a DUI!! I didn't even drink!! Fortunately after three years, the records don't count.
My mom works for Provencial Insurance (I think that's the name, something that starts with a 'P'), and would often tell me they can make reasonable rates. Since it's a toll free number (Sorry don't know it, I've been here so long!!), and might be worth investigating, at least.
As for slacking on the treatments, what can I say, other than *cyber hug* !! Besides, if you look in the dictionary for slacker, probably got my name and photo for the latest edition!
Truly, I'm sure everyone who is edging depression, or even stress, doesn't have much energy to do much. I was fighting the stress too, and would recommend listening to some easy-listening music to try and relax, or finding something you enjoy doing. Talking to someone whom you know is a good listener also may help. Hope things go well, and give Bob, your purple dragon a hug for me!
 

Lilith

New member
Kybert, I would insist on having an echo done, just to be sure. I'm having mine done today, so I'll report later if I have any news. We might be suffering from the same thing!

Uli, I understand what you mean. Resistance is always a big issue in the back of my head. I never go for too long without doing a med. I think the longest I've ever gone without doing a single treatment was a month, way back when I was a kid.

Fred, yes, Bob is being emo, too! LOL! I did as you suggested, and had a little heart-to-heart with Rick. We seem to have resolved the issue. Hopefully it won't come up again! Its nice to know that we're not the only ones having an issue with State Farm, but luckily, they corrected the issue. Now Rick only has to pay $20 more a month as opposed to $400! If they ever give us any more trouble, though, I'll remember your suggestion. Thanks a lot! And I believe the name of the insurance company you're speaking of is Prudential. You were close, though! My stress seems to have ebbed a little, but I'm still worried about this heart echo today.

I'll post an update later if I find out anything from my appointment. Maybe it'll be a clue for you others suffering from heart issues!
 
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