Hey Kayla,
I am so sorry that you are dealing with this. I do understand to some extent.
I had my transplant last year and when I first started seeing my friends again they thought I was all better - or that I had "dodged a bullet". In a sense I did dodge a bullet, BUT that doesn't mean that the rest of our lives are bullet free.
I had my annual last month and a few of my friends just said so now you are going to be fine right. You won't have rejection or get sick or anything because you are 1 year out. I just said the likelihood lessens in regards to rejection but it is still possible. It is ALWAYS possible.
I hate that you are going through this but people don't realize that alot of the things we experience with the transplant are damaging - physically and mentally. As spectacular as life is and can be post transplant alot of changes come with it.
I had a hard time too with my family and some personality changes I have supposedly had since my transplant - I just contribute it to lack of patience and my meds. People sometimes just think I am making excuses to be fussy or tired or what have you. Quite honestly I do have less to make excuses over now - but that doesn't take away the constant worries and thoughts that run through your head in regards to this whole process.
Like Tracy said you can be told what transplant is like but you NEVER really know until you go through it. Sometimes from the outside it seems easy, sometimes hard, sometimes not worth it, but what people don't realize is it is at times all of those things. They also don't realize that since you may be feeling better and not complaining about EVERYTHING that is bothering you that you may be in pain, sore, scared, confused about your mind and the thoughts you have or just confused and scared about how your body is changing.
I hope that your friends are able to step back and see the big picture or at least a portion of the big picture soon and that you are able to find someone that will at the very least listen and not judge you for how you are feeling or what you are going through with this.
Love Lindsey