Lost my Sister-why oh why???

  • Thread starter danceswithdolphins1274
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danceswithdolphins1274

Guest
Tuesday, May 28th we lost my dear sister, Dea Mason, to Cystic Fibrosis. She fought for three and a half weeks in the hospital. I guess her body could not take any more. 39 years old and had to fight for her life. She left behind a husband and the most wonderful 15 yr old daughter. Why oh why must my sibilings have to struggle for a breath? I hate this disease so much. Even more so now that it took my sister and best friend away from me. I am scared to death that I will lose my brother too...If any of you out there has lost a sibling...can you tell me if it gets any easier? I am CRUSHED. I know that I need to stay positive but how on earth can I stay positive when she just went to the ER for what we thought was going to be an admittance for her two week clean out???????? Instead, 14 hours of her going to the ER she was intubated and then within 3 hours of that was put on life support....UUUUGGGHHHHH(as she would say). I know she is breathing easier now and has her beautiful angel wings, but I don't want to let her go. If any of you out there that has lost a sibiling and some advice for me...I would be greatful forever. I feel like I'm falling and falling and not sure how I am supposed to get up. I am ANGRY.... Thank yo for listening(U)
 
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Aboveallislove

Super Moderator
I am sorry for you anguish. And will pray for you and your family. Wish there were words I'd comfort, but ther aren't. Jesus WEPT when his closest friend Lazarus died and He knew he would raise Lazarus and how wonderful heaven is. May God hold you tightly. Hugs and prayers,
love
 
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Kaethe108

Guest
I lost my father a few years ago due to a horrible tragedy.
The only thing I can tell is: Yes, it will get easier.
You will always miss her and never forget her, but it will not hurt so much anymore over time.
I am very sorry for your loss and I hope you have friends and family around to support each other.

(Being buddhist, I myself believe that we do not only have this one live, but endless lives! So for me it is a beautiful thought that all the people we lose to this horrible disease get born again in young and healthy bodies with fresh and clean lungs that make it easy to breathe and live life to its fullest!)
 
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JENNYC

New member
My heart just broke in two for you! I can't imagine losing my sisters. I'm so sorry doesn't seem like the right words for such a thing :( You will be in my prayers along with her beautiful family.
 
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BreathinSteven

Guest
I’m sorry for your loss, DancesWithDolphins… I’m sorry for your sister’s husband and daughter… I sometimes try, but I don’t know if I can imagine a loss like this… I’ve lost friends – I think about my lung donor – I’ve lost older family members, but that’s kinda supposed to happen… The loss of a sibling at a young age is a thought I struggle with. I was supposed to be the one my family lost – probably long ago. In a silly way – I think I’d always been prepared to go early… I’d assumed my parents would outlive me and was not prepared when I lost my dad, even though he was 70. I think that, with CF, it’s in the back of many of our minds that our lives may be cut short.

Your beautiful sister lived 39 years with cystic fibrosis. She got married. She had a child. As far as we cystic fibrosis patients go – she appears to have had a pretty fruitful life. And it sounds like she has a special brother, and special sister-and-best-friend (you) who supported her all of those years – and doubtless, some of those years were difficult. Dea lived a lot longer than many – she blessed you and her family longer than many CF sufferers. She also did not live as long as some. So many of us never experience what your sister experienced – it’s sad that she’s left us, but it’s wonderful that she had a supportive family like you, and that she was able to experience things in life that some never experience…

I wrote this about a CF friend once, for whom I had the honor of giving part of her eulogy, and it might fit well with how you feel about your beautiful sister: Dea didn’t deserve her cystic fibrosis, she didn’t deserve all she went through then, and now… She deserved so much more than 39 years. Life is kinda puzzling sometimes and what happened to our Dea was not fair – but life isn’t fair or unfair… Life just is… Life just happens. We’re all given a battle plan in life – and some of us seem to draw much more difficult assignments than others… But, we all fight with the spirit we’re given – we will always admire your spirit, Dea…

I’m so sorry for your loss, Dances… I wish I could say something to make you feel better now… There’s a quote I love: “Don’t cry because it’s over, smile because it happened…” I hope that, at some point in the near future, you can smile at the fact that Dea graced this planet. Love, Steve
 
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kgfrompa

Guest
I am so sorry for your loss Praying for you and your Family
 
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danceswithdolphins1274

Guest
Steve, thank you for your words. I never would have imagined losing a sibiling either. I mean, I knew it would happy eventually, when we were old and gray. I just didn't expect her to get so sick so fast. I honesly thought it would be a slower process. She got so sick so fast our heads were spinning. However, I know she is smiling down on me and watching over all of us! I am PROUD to be her sister and to have been a part of her life. Someone wondered if I had friends or family to speak with. I do. I speak to them every day. My mom, dad, brother, husband, bro-in-law, my niece, my three daughters, aunts uncles...they are all helping me and I am helping them, as much as I can anyway. My sister touched so many lives. She was amazing. Steve, congratulations on your transplant!!! Hope you are doing well!Thank you to all of you!!!!
 
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danceswithdolphins1274

Guest
That should say happen...not happy....uggghhh
 
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danceswithdolphins1274

Guest
Sorry for your loss LL. I know how it hurts
 
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keefer11

New member
Yes, I understand what you are going through. I lost my sister/best friend to CF two years ago and I have CF too. Personally, I don't say it get's easier, it gets different. The way you grieve gets different. Everything is different. Let people help you and be there for you, don't shut them out, you need them, trust me. Keep talking about memories with her, you don't want to forget them.

Try and do something to honor her. I did a bike ride and made a team in honor of her, I volunteer with Donate Life in honor of her, try and do something annually in honor of her. I'm thinking about making a team for her at the annual donate life walk. It's hard, but I still do all of the traditions we did every year so I can remember her. Be there for your parents, they need you right now especially.

It's REALLY hard, but try and keep busy, keep living life to the fullest, she would want you to.

Feel free to message me as I know exactly how you feel.
 
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Mg930

New member
I am so sorry for your loss. How heartbreaking. I lost my sister when I was 20 (she was 24) and I was crushed. I will be 38 in a few weeks so as hard as it is to believe, it has been 18 years. Tears are streaming down my face as I write this as I still cannot believe she is gone. She was such a special person and I am constantly thinking how different my life would be if she was still here and what she would have accomplished. However, it has gotten easier throughout the years and I know she is looking down and watching over me. My sister also went down hill quickly and eventually had a lung transplant which failed miserably. She never woke up from surgery. I think I was in denial that she could ever leave this earth as I just could not believe what was happening. I remember the severe heartache when she first died and the pain definitely lessens. Hang in there. It will get easier. You will be in my thoughts and prayers.
 
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azdesertrat

New member
So sorry for your loss, you & yours are in my prayers. Cystic fibrosis SUCKS! I've been dealing with this monster for 49 yrs. now. Its not getting any easier. It gets harder each day. Now, even after a double-lung transplant, I'm still failing. I just spent another week at UMC in Tucson after having to be med-evac'ed via helicopter ambulance. Thank God for the pilots & crews. My Dad flew helicopters in Vietnam, where the air ambulance concept was pioneered. I'm in awe of those men & women; they've saved my butt 3 times now. Anyway, I'm very sorry you lost your sister & I'm praying for a cure for this rotten crap. I'm sick of dealing with it & I know there are many more like me. May God bless & be with you; & with all of us affected by this awful disease...
 
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