Hello everyone,It's been a while since I posted. Everything is going great with Jaycee. We just have to have surgery on Thursday for polyps and having tonsils and adnoids removed. I just have a decision I've been trying to come to a conclusion on and I'm not able to. When Jaycee was 2 years old before we ever knew she had cf we got her a $10,000 life insurance policy. Now we are very glad that we did get that because she won't be able to get any more than that. My mother has recently brought up to me that we go ahead and purchase a funeral policy for her in case if anything should happen. I'm like a lot of cf parents and don't want to think of that possibly happening but know that it could. I want my daughter to live a long and happy life. One part of me feels like this would be a good thing to do, because when she gets older that would be another burden taken off of her family to have to deal with. However, I feel that by doing this that I am saying ok this is whats going to happen and this is what I'm going to do, it just makes me feel like I'm letting go of the fight by doing that. I guess my biggest problem is that no parent ever wants to think of the fact that their child could go before them. I know that even by doing this that it won't change the fact that I will keep on making sure she does her treatments and does the things a normal child does. I'm just very torn. Please help, let me know what everyone thinks. Thanks, Melissa M mom to Jaycee 5 w/ cf
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need advice
- Thread starter anonymous
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No one wants to think about this type of topic. Many people avoid the subject at all expense. Unfortunetly its a part of life. With us its an avid part that always hangs there waiting. My Mom had a baby die at 2 months (long before I was thought of & not from CF) & my sisters oldest son was killed in a car accident. Do you think either of them wanted to deal with the death/funeral? Of course not, but having that extra money would have eased the burden. Many people dont want to even get life insurance for themselves when there are no health issues. Please dont ever think that any planning for the future such as life insurance or a funeral policy is a way of giving up. It no way dictates how well your child will do. It just softens the blow financially should things happen in a way that they shouldnt such as Child going before Parent. I personally am looking into Pre-Death Funeral Arrangements. This is where things are decided & paid for ahead of time. My decision to do so was influenced by the fact that my brother is a certified mortician & works for a local funeral home so he will be helping me. Its only to help ease the burden for my husband, daughter, mother etc when my time comes. It does not mean I am giving up. Nor does it mean that the CF will be the reason for my death. Hell I might have a heart attack from too much sex! (SORRY--Couldnt resist the temptation to try & ease the tension) <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-wink.gif" border="0">
Hello,Well I know excactly what you are talking about I have two that have cf and the thought of something happening and not being able to take care of things worries me. I had a sister that died at birth and my mom and dad couldn't afford a proper casket or headstone or anything. I don't want this for my family so I looked into all sorts of arrangements. But I was shocked to find out that if you are on disabilty this counts as income. Just thought you should be aware if you are a parent that is unable to work and things and you somewhat depend on disability for your child this hopefully will help.Kindellamom of Jeremy (5)w/cf, and Johnny (3)w/cf
MJC - actually, sex is good for CF as it's exersize <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-smile.gif" border="0"> so you go on baby <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-smile.gif" border="0">ahem. back to topic.i'm 20, with CF. my mother lost a baby before i was born to CF. i am content with this fact of my disease, but of course she wouldn't hear of it. i can understand her - it's very painful to know that your child may go before you do, and given my late brother, well, it's twice as painful. but it's a fact. i don't think that by arranging the financial aspect of the funeral you're giving up. it means that you recognize this may happen, and you're prepared in the financial way. i know it's easier to say nah, that wouldn't happen, but that's the wrong approach, in my opinion.i personally haven't done anything legal about my own funeral, but that's mostly because i live in israel, and this is a very religious country, and i really don't know if it's possible. and that doesn't mean i'll die soon or that i plan to - it's just something that might help my parents when i go. i remember when my maternal grandmother died. according to judaism, you have to bury the person the day of their death, unless it's shabbat or holiday. so granny died early morning, and at 2 pm the funeral was held, and my parents, in the middle of the grief and shock had to think about money and arrangements... and it was horrible.
Hi Melissa!I remember hearing the flight list of the plane that crashed in Pennsylvania on 9-11-01. One of the passengers was a little boy that was almost the same age as Madison. I think they were less than 30 days apart. Of course on 9-10-01, anyone asks would have said the little boy would live longer than Madison. However, that was not the case.We do not know what the future holds. If you think this a good financial decision, do it. I am in the insurance business and have never thought about burial policies for anyone in our family. Perhaps I am naive, non chalant or just dumb. I guess we are too wrapped up in saving for college and weddings for three girls. Best wishes!Don P
don,i can see your point. we don't know, none of us, when are we going to die. it actually looks silly to me how everybody who is somehow related to cf blocks out death and tries not to think of it... it's not like only the people with cf are going to die. everybody else will, as well. it just seems more dramatic with us because we have an illness, but in reality, it isn't more dramatic. just seems that way. when i'm saying near my parents "i'm going to die", they always say "big deal, so are we". <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-smile.gif" border="0">