I have often thought of how I will explain to my daughter that her illness is life threatening, but I also wonder how I will tell her that she may not ever have children. I know that she may be able because of all the success stories of CF women who give birth, but I also think she needs to know that she may be one of those that can't have children. I guess my question is two fold....for those of you with CF, at what age did you find out that you might not be able to have kids (and how did you find out) and for you parents that had to deliver the news, how did you do it? <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-confused.gif" border="0">
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parents of girl cf children
- Thread starter anonymous
- Start date
Emily65Roses
New member
I think I always knew kids might be a problem. I always knew that CF men tended to be sterile, but I also knew that CF women had trouble. As it is, I had a hysterectomy at 18, so now I definitely can't. At least not the normal way. She should know there's a possibility she may not be able to have kids, but CF female likelihood of having kids is much higher than that of CF males (except I hear they get a good success rate with IVF).
Either way, even if she can't naturally conceive, she still can have children. It is pretty devastating to know you can't naturally have kids (assuming, of course, that you want them), I am still dealing with it all the time. But I just think of how it could always be worse. As in, I could have no chances of ever having kids at all in any way.
I know that's no help to people who aren't already sure that it's physically impossible to have kids, because until you're in that position, you refuse at all costs, to entertain the idea. And, as I said, it's still very likely she'll be able to have kids of her own one day. But if not, if she ever gets to the point where she knows it's impossible... There are always other options. <img src="i/expressions/rose.gif" border="0">
Either way, even if she can't naturally conceive, she still can have children. It is pretty devastating to know you can't naturally have kids (assuming, of course, that you want them), I am still dealing with it all the time. But I just think of how it could always be worse. As in, I could have no chances of ever having kids at all in any way.
I know that's no help to people who aren't already sure that it's physically impossible to have kids, because until you're in that position, you refuse at all costs, to entertain the idea. And, as I said, it's still very likely she'll be able to have kids of her own one day. But if not, if she ever gets to the point where she knows it's impossible... There are always other options. <img src="i/expressions/rose.gif" border="0">
thats quite confusing!, ive been told that men are sterile, but woman have no problem getting pregnant and that its been proven, the only thing is that a womans mucus near her cervix can be thicker making it harder for the sperm to penatrate, but other than that they have the same chance as non CFers.
I always knew that I had a disease, and even though I knew it was serious, I wasn't treated any different, so I never thought I was that different. When I was a teenager, things were a little different, and I came to some realizations on my own. There were some tough moments, and there still are, but I had love and support from my family and friends, so I was able to understand that MY life is what I make of it.
I wouldn't worry about telling her up front " You may not be able to have kids". She will learn about it in time, and she'll make her own decision when she's ready. I'm assuming that she's pretty young, and there's no sense in telling her all the terrible "what ifs" of CF.
Debbie
23 w/ CF
I wouldn't worry about telling her up front " You may not be able to have kids". She will learn about it in time, and she'll make her own decision when she's ready. I'm assuming that she's pretty young, and there's no sense in telling her all the terrible "what ifs" of CF.
Debbie
23 w/ CF
It's kind of like finding out that I had CF. No one ever sat me down and told me- I just always knew. And I have always known that having children might not be the best choice, or even possible depending on my health at that time in my life. As I prepare to get married the question comes up more and more, and I know that my body at this point couldn't possibly carry a child without doing serious harm to myself. If I chose to have a child I would hope that I was well enough physically so that I am there for the baby after it is born. I have no doubt my soon-to-be-husband will make a good father, I just prefer to parent with him. It isn't impossible, that is what she must know - and that by the time she is at that point in life medicine will have changed so much again that she might be in fantastic health and it might not be an issue at all.
We must remain hopeful, if we fail to believe good things can happen then we fail to live fully.
Sarah 27w/cf
We must remain hopeful, if we fail to believe good things can happen then we fail to live fully.
Sarah 27w/cf