Should I send my 18mth old to a preschool or keep him home?

[lovemyboy507]

Ok - I am the very proud mum of twins (boy/girl) one with and one without CF. They are the best of friends but I have been thinking about sending them to preschool for a couple of mornings a week and I wonder if thats selfish of me when I dont have to and he could stay home and safe.

Thoughts please

 

[Printer]

I was 47 when I was first Dx but remember symptoms as early as 3. I was the oldest of 4 (with 5 1/2 years between me and the youngest. Whatever was going on at school, one of us brought it home. I had every childhood disease, including Scarlet Fever and Whooping Cough.

Two things, one you can't keep him in a bubble, two, if she goes to preschool, she will bring everything home to share with her brother.

Take the "couple of mornings" for yourself.

Bill

 

[lovemyboy507]

Thanks Bill - I have worked in rare diseases for over 15 years but nothing prepares you for actually having you gorgeous baby have one! I know all gene types are different but seeing that you are 74 just gives me hope thank you


I know your right and I am sure alot of people think Im stupid but I am just struggling with this he has done so well being at home.

Thanks again

 

[nmw0615]

My parents sent me to preschool as soon as they could. I was kept home if there was something going around in the class, more than 7 people in the class of 16. Other than that, I went to school and loved it.

 

[jshet]

Call me old school, but I think sending any 18mos. old cf or not to preschool is strange. Preschool age is 3-4 years old, not 18 mos. Everything seems to be such a race for our children today. What really are they going to get from school right now besides sick?

Enjoy them. They will be preschool age in the blink of an eye. Don't rush it. I think they will learn so much more with you right now then with anyone else. All kids get sick more often when they first enter a school setting. They just seem a little young yet to expose them to this if they do not need to be.

 

[lovemyboy507]

What you say is fair, and is exeactly what I am afraid of. we were thinking a couple of mornings a week when they get to 2 (you have to register now as they cap the class at 7) We only recently moved to the US so we have no family and only a couple of friends so thought this may be fun for them but not at the expense of my sons health

Thanks for sharing your thoughts

 

[jshet]

You definitely a loving mother who only wants the best for her kids. No selfishness in you. They are so lucky that you are putting so much thought and effort into your decision.
It's a shame that at such a young age you already have to pre register them for things. Everything is so pressured for parents who constantly feel like they are second guessing themselves and their decisions.
Don't worry, when the time comes, you will make the best decision for your children. All children should be so lucky. Good luck

 

[Ratatosk]

Ds went to daycare/preschool. Got socialization, preparation for kindergarten, got exercise. I would make sure the enforce their sick policies, are good about sanitizing toys surfaces...

 

[Gammaw]

I completely understand your dilemma. You are being a good Mom, not a selfish one. There is nothing wrong with taking care of yourself - you need to. But I wouldn't send them at 18 months. Consider bringing a nanny or babysitter in for you to have a respite.
At their age, kids drool over things, stick their fingers perpetually in their mouths, wipe snot over everything they touch and have diaper issues. Keeping things clean is impossible. Protect yours as long as you can and give their lungs more time before the onslaught.

 

[JennyCoulon]

You can't keep your child in a bubble you just have to teach good hygiene, good handwashing, etc. They will get sick but so do other kids without CF. You deserve some mommy time to yourself and they will love school.

 

[ymikhale]

IMHO not sending 18m/o babies to daycare is not called keeping them in a bubble. I agree with jchet that preschool starts at around 4. Our CF hodpital advised us against daycare until the age of 3 b/c their airways are really tiny when they are babies and the potential of a cold turning into somethiing nasty is greater. Is getting a nanny/babysitter an option for you financially? If it is, I would not hesitate, my dd (6 y/o) went to preschool at 3 and she is a bright and very sociable child.

 

[ForeverDance]

I also agree that choosing not to put a child in daycare does not equate to keeping them in a bubble. We made the decision not to put our DD in daycare because our clinic "strongly suggested" that it was not the best idea for her. There are so many sick children and it is very difficult to keep your child from interacting with other sick kids. We specifically asked about what they felt would happen when she started school if she wasn't exposed to a day care setting, would it be the same. They suggested that hopefully by the time she enters school she will have had time to grow enough antibodies to make it less of an issue. We have always been encouraged to make sure that DD gets exposure to as many people and situations as possible so that she can develop those antibodies. DD might not go to daycare but she goes to the local playground, she attends a gymnastics class, and always travels to various cities and schools with us when our older daughter has a basketball tournament. This allows us to help her body get exposure to germs without interacting directly with those that are sick. So far, it has worked well for us. DD is amazingly healthy, has never been hospitalized, and has not yet this year been on antibiotics (knock on wood).

 

[Gammaw]

By the time you pay for preschool/daycare, you can pay for a nanny/sitter to come into your home and play with your child one on one, teach colors and letters, take to the park, museum, and even playdates. And the exposure to bacteria and viruses is limited until immunities and strong lungs have had a chance. I know I posted that same suggestion already but I'm glad to see so many others chime in on the same line. That is the approach we took. Our 9 year old has only been hospitalized for one tune up, altho we've had surgery for polyps several times. Out CF Clinic recommended he stay out of daycare as long as possible when he was born. So we brought in nursing students, elementary education students, and similar people throughout infancy and toddler hood while we could. He went to only one year of daycare, then half day preschool, and kindergarten. He's had no trouble socially or academically. He does well.
I also believe there are several studies that suggest most children (not specific for CF) do better overall, socially and academically, if they stay at home until preschool and kindergarten age. But that's a whole different debate which you can research to make you're own conclusions!

 

[Linda2012]

It's totally your choice and you are not wrong either way. I was in your place last year trying to decide whether or not to enroll my son in pre-school at 2. I decided to wait until this year so he'll start this September at 3. When he was just an infant, I joined at local mom's group and through them found playgroups that we've been going to two days a week. He still gets sick from the other kids, but at least it's more controlled because there are less kids and I'm there to make sure his hands are washed, etc. If you are nervous about pre-school, but want him to socialize more, you could try that. Or you could try pre-school and if he starts getting too sick, pull him out and wait.

 

[anna786]

Hi!
I would suggest that you should send your kid to preschool. They will teach him how to explore, hygiene and sharing and extra curricular activities.
Thanks

 

[mom2two]

I know that my youngest child, at 22 months, was begging us to go to preschool from 9-noon. She'd watched her older sister go to school, been there at pickup, saw all the other kids, and really really wanted to go. We told her that she could only go if she were potty trained. (thinking that would delay the situation for a bit). Nope. She literally trained over night, poo and pee. She really craved that social interaction with other children, and no matter how many groups and activities I signed up for with her, she didnt feel like she was getting her fill of peers. It was not something that I was able to provide at home, nor would a nanny. I think every kid and every situation is different. You know your own child best and the surrounding issues. You gotta go with what works for you and your family. My daughter loved it and always wanted to go, every morning.