Sports Organization Discriminating against my daughter w/CF

fallenarches · Oct 20, 2011

Not everyone is going to be able to participate in every activity, CF or not. There are a lot of things I would love to do but can't for one reason or another. If she physically can't go without eating for a hour and a half, perhaps this isn't the best option for her. Maybe there is another cheer team she could join that isn't so physically demanding. Three hours of cheering with only a short break at halftime is a LOT for a 7 year old. Even at the professional level, that is a LOT.

Mom2Brinly · Oct 20, 2011

Follow up-

Thank you to those for your kind words of support- umm... for the rest of you! ;(

The organization is run through the city therefore the ADA act is in place. I will of course not take that route because i cannot waste anymore energy on this! She is only 7years old and reasonable accomodations must be made. I am NOT asking them to shorten the football game time because my child can't breath. jeez! If she had low fevs and couldn't jump do you really think i would ask the moon to be moved! It is in the hands of the parks and recreation director. The director has called the coach /ex friend and told her that if Brinly does need to eat and take breaks etc. then she needs to let her! I am sorry i am going to be an advocate for her til the end! SHE DOES HAVE SPECIAL NEEDS and just like we got to ride the front fast pass at Disney for every single line she will get what she needs!

There are many other parents on the squad with no CF issues and the head coach/ex-friend has been totally out of line with. She basically has called hard rules and does not follw them herself. She sends out the wrong field locations and then penalizes the child to sit out and not cheer because the parents took the cheer child to the wrong field in which she instructed. I could go on but it is too much.
Brinly just ABSOLUTELY loves cheer and i am stepping aside a bit until the 2 games that are left are over then she will get a ear full!

Blythe
Mom to Brinly 7 w/CF
don't mess with momma bear- lol

Mom2Brinly · Oct 20, 2011

Follow up-

Thank you to those for your kind words of support- umm... for the rest of you! ;(

The organization is run through the city therefore the ADA act is in place. I will of course not take that route because i cannot waste anymore energy on this! She is only 7years old and reasonable accomodations must be made. I am NOT asking them to shorten the football game time because my child can't breath. jeez! If she had low fevs and couldn't jump do you really think i would ask the moon to be moved! It is in the hands of the parks and recreation director. The director has called the coach /ex friend and told her that if Brinly does need to eat and take breaks etc. then she needs to let her! I am sorry i am going to be an advocate for her til the end! SHE DOES HAVE SPECIAL NEEDS and just like we got to ride the front fast pass at Disney for every single line she will get what she needs!

There are many other parents on the squad with no CF issues and the head coach/ex-friend has been totally out of line with. She basically has called hard rules and does not follw them herself. She sends out the wrong field locations and then penalizes the child to sit out and not cheer because the parents took the cheer child to the wrong field in which she instructed. I could go on but it is too much.
Brinly just ABSOLUTELY loves cheer and i am stepping aside a bit until the 2 games that are left are over then she will get a ear full!

Blythe
Mom to Brinly 7 w/CF
don't mess with momma bear- lol

Mom2Brinly · Oct 20, 2011

Follow up-
 
 
 Thank you to those for your kind words of support- umm... for the rest of you! ;(
 
 The organization is run through the city therefore the ADA act is in place. I will of course not take that route because i cannot waste anymore energy on this! She is only 7years old and reasonable accomodations must be made. I am NOT asking them to shorten the football game time because my child can't breath. jeez! If she had low fevs and couldn't jump do you really think i would ask the moon to be moved! It is in the hands of the parks and recreation director. The director has called the coach /ex friend and told her that if Brinly does need to eat and take breaks etc. then she needs to let her! I am sorry i am going to be an advocate for her til the end! SHE DOES HAVE SPECIAL NEEDS and just like we got to ride the front fast pass at Disney for every single line she will get what she needs!
 
 There are many other parents on the squad with no CF issues and the head coach/ex-friend has been totally out of line with. She basically has called hard rules and does not follw them herself. She sends out the wrong field locations and then penalizes the child to sit out and not cheer because the parents took the cheer child to the wrong field in which she instructed. I could go on but it is too much.
 Brinly just ABSOLUTELY loves cheer and i am stepping aside a bit until the 2 games that are left are over then she will get a ear full!
 
 Blythe
 Mom to Brinly 7 w/CF
 don't mess with momma bear- lol

Havoc · Oct 20, 2011

There are 2 separate issues here:

1. Your daughter's health needs on a non-competitive cheer squad at the age of 7. I agree that at that young of an age and in a non-competitive environment there should be no problem with her taking a break for a snack (or any of them for that matter).

2. Bad coach, makes hard rules for kids who are way too young, other parents have just as much of a problem as you.

The problem is using disability to smack the coach without having to get in there and correct the problem. If you and the other parents have a problem with the rules and bad directions and general disarray that seems to be the result of this particular coach, you, as an individual or as a group, need to voice your displeasure. Preferably to the coach herself and then to her superiors if you can't resolve the situation directly. As a paying customer, essentially, your opinion should carry a lot of weight as they stand to lose a lot of money if you all quit. This is a case of a bad coach and not discrimination (especially when you state that parents with non-CF kids have just as many problems). It should not be resolved by invoking your daughter's CF. I don't approve of using a disability to get what you want.

Havoc · Oct 20, 2011

There are 2 separate issues here:

1. Your daughter's health needs on a non-competitive cheer squad at the age of 7. I agree that at that young of an age and in a non-competitive environment there should be no problem with her taking a break for a snack (or any of them for that matter).

2. Bad coach, makes hard rules for kids who are way too young, other parents have just as much of a problem as you.

The problem is using disability to smack the coach without having to get in there and correct the problem. If you and the other parents have a problem with the rules and bad directions and general disarray that seems to be the result of this particular coach, you, as an individual or as a group, need to voice your displeasure. Preferably to the coach herself and then to her superiors if you can't resolve the situation directly. As a paying customer, essentially, your opinion should carry a lot of weight as they stand to lose a lot of money if you all quit. This is a case of a bad coach and not discrimination (especially when you state that parents with non-CF kids have just as many problems). It should not be resolved by invoking your daughter's CF. I don't approve of using a disability to get what you want.

Havoc · Oct 20, 2011

There are 2 separate issues here:
 
 1. Your daughter's health needs on a non-competitive cheer squad at the age of 7. I agree that at that young of an age and in a non-competitive environment there should be no problem with her taking a break for a snack (or any of them for that matter).
 
 2. Bad coach, makes hard rules for kids who are way too young, other parents have just as much of a problem as you.
 
 The problem is using disability to smack the coach without having to get in there and correct the problem. If you and the other parents have a problem with the rules and bad directions and general disarray that seems to be the result of this particular coach, you, as an individual or as a group, need to voice your displeasure. Preferably to the coach herself and then to her superiors if you can't resolve the situation directly. As a paying customer, essentially, your opinion should carry a lot of weight as they stand to lose a lot of money if you all quit. This is a case of a bad coach and not discrimination (especially when you state that parents with non-CF kids have just as many problems). It should not be resolved by invoking your daughter's CF. I don't approve of using a disability to get what you want.

mackenziesmom · Oct 21, 2011

Bravo! Continue to be an advocate for your daughter. Your experience though is exactly why we never discussed our son's CF with neighbors, school friends, or acquaintances. When my son was very young, (he is 21 now) I had the opportunity to interview a man in his 30s who had CF. He played high school football until his coach found out he had CF. They benched him and he never played again. He advised me to keep the CF diagnosis quiet and we did. My son had an extremely normal life until he became very sick at 17 with a virus and was put on a ventilator. He almost died and then everyone found out he had CF. I was very happy that he had 17 years with no one pitying him, treating him differently or using discrimination. Some of that did happen when he returned to high school on oxygen. CF kids are treated differently because people don't understand the disease.<div>Going to the director and letting her handle your daughter's situation was a good idea. Sounds like you're dealing with a bad coach. What if she had a girl with diabetes on the team? They have to test blood sugar and eat periodically. How would she have handled that? I think some sensitivity training is in order. And it's hard to believe we're talking about 7-year-old cheerleaders here!</div><div> </div>

mackenziesmom · Oct 21, 2011

Bravo! Continue to be an advocate for your daughter. Your experience though is exactly why we never discussed our son's CF with neighbors, school friends, or acquaintances. When my son was very young, (he is 21 now) I had the opportunity to interview a man in his 30s who had CF. He played high school football until his coach found out he had CF. They benched him and he never played again. He advised me to keep the CF diagnosis quiet and we did. My son had an extremely normal life until he became very sick at 17 with a virus and was put on a ventilator. He almost died and then everyone found out he had CF. I was very happy that he had 17 years with no one pitying him, treating him differently or using discrimination. Some of that did happen when he returned to high school on oxygen. CF kids are treated differently because people don't understand the disease.Going to the director and letting her handle your daughter's situation was a good idea. Sounds like you're dealing with a bad coach. What if she had a girl with diabetes on the team? They have to test blood sugar and eat periodically. How would she have handled that? I think some sensitivity training is in order. And it's hard to believe we're talking about 7-year-old cheerleaders here!

mackenziesmom · Oct 21, 2011

Bravo! Continue to be an advocate for your daughter. Your experience though is exactly why we never discussed our son's CF with neighbors, school friends, or acquaintances. When my son was very young, (he is 21 now) I had the opportunity to interview a man in his 30s who had CF. He played high school football until his coach found out he had CF. They benched him and he never played again. He advised me to keep the CF diagnosis quiet and we did. My son had an extremely normal life until he became very sick at 17 with a virus and was put on a ventilator. He almost died and then everyone found out he had CF. I was very happy that he had 17 years with no one pitying him, treating him differently or using discrimination. Some of that did happen when he returned to high school on oxygen. CF kids are treated differently because people don't understand the disease.Going to the director and letting her handle your daughter's situation was a good idea. Sounds like you're dealing with a bad coach. What if she had a girl with diabetes on the team? They have to test blood sugar and eat periodically. How would she have handled that? I think some sensitivity training is in order. And it's hard to believe we're talking about 7-year-old cheerleaders here!

mamaScarlett · Oct 21, 2011

<div class="FTQUOTE"><begin quote>Originally posted by: Mom2Brinly

Follow up-

Thank you to those for your kind words of support- umm... for the rest of you! ;(

The organization is run through the city therefore the ADA act is in place. I will of course not take that route because i cannot waste anymore energy on this! She is only 7years old and reasonable accomodations must be made. I am NOT asking them to shorten the football game time because my child can't breath. jeez! If she had low fevs and couldn't jump do you really think i would ask the moon to be moved! It is in the hands of the parks and recreation director. The director has called the coach /ex friend and told her that if Brinly does need to eat and take breaks etc. then she needs to let her! I am sorry i am going to be an advocate for her til the end! SHE DOES HAVE SPECIAL NEEDS and just like we got to ride the front fast pass at Disney for every single line she will get what she needs!

There are many other parents on the squad with no CF issues and the head coach/ex-friend has been totally out of line with. She basically has called hard rules and does not follw them herself. She sends out the wrong field locations and then penalizes the child to sit out and not cheer because the parents took the cheer child to the wrong field in which she instructed. I could go on but it is too much.

Brinly just ABSOLUTELY loves cheer and i am stepping aside a bit until the 2 games that are left are over then she will get a ear full!

Blythe

Mom to Brinly 7 w/CF

don't mess with momma bear- lol</end quote></div> Like I said before, I sympathize with you here. I think for the people that posted that were a little more critical of the situation, you have to understand you're looking at the balance of a parents perspective (yours) and the experience of an adult cfer (us). All I can say, again from experience, is be very careful about your approach regarding this, esp in front of your daughter. Your disney/line comment in particular hit a nerve. You're right, of course-I get a letter from my doctor also when we go there for the same reason. But, when parents voice this, sometimes it creates an 'i deserve this' mentality. Even though its bc of her health, thats still not good. Believe me, I've had to work really hard to realize that even though I have cf, I'm still not going to get everyone to understand and I'm not going to be able to snap my fingers and get accommodated all the time. I'm not saying you're sending that message, my mom wasn't either. But thats what happens with kids. Especially when you throw peers and other kids into the mix. Just an adult cfers perspective.

mamaScarlett · Oct 21, 2011

<div class="FTQUOTE"><begin quote>Originally posted by: Mom2Brinly

Follow up-

Thank you to those for your kind words of support- umm... for the rest of you! ;(

The organization is run through the city therefore the ADA act is in place. I will of course not take that route because i cannot waste anymore energy on this! She is only 7years old and reasonable accomodations must be made. I am NOT asking them to shorten the football game time because my child can't breath. jeez! If she had low fevs and couldn't jump do you really think i would ask the moon to be moved! It is in the hands of the parks and recreation director. The director has called the coach /ex friend and told her that if Brinly does need to eat and take breaks etc. then she needs to let her! I am sorry i am going to be an advocate for her til the end! SHE DOES HAVE SPECIAL NEEDS and just like we got to ride the front fast pass at Disney for every single line she will get what she needs!

There are many other parents on the squad with no CF issues and the head coach/ex-friend has been totally out of line with. She basically has called hard rules and does not follw them herself. She sends out the wrong field locations and then penalizes the child to sit out and not cheer because the parents took the cheer child to the wrong field in which she instructed. I could go on but it is too much.

Brinly just ABSOLUTELY loves cheer and i am stepping aside a bit until the 2 games that are left are over then she will get a ear full!

Blythe

Mom to Brinly 7 w/CF

don't mess with momma bear- lol</end quote> Like I said before, I sympathize with you here. I think for the people that posted that were a little more critical of the situation, you have to understand you're looking at the balance of a parents perspective (yours) and the experience of an adult cfer (us).

mamaScarlett · Oct 21, 2011

<div class="FTQUOTE"><begin quote>Originally posted by: Mom2Brinly

Follow up-

Thank you to those for your kind words of support- umm... for the rest of you! ;(

The organization is run through the city therefore the ADA act is in place. I will of course not take that route because i cannot waste anymore energy on this! She is only 7years old and reasonable accomodations must be made. I am NOT asking them to shorten the football game time because my child can't breath. jeez! If she had low fevs and couldn't jump do you really think i would ask the moon to be moved! It is in the hands of the parks and recreation director. The director has called the coach /ex friend and told her that if Brinly does need to eat and take breaks etc. then she needs to let her! I am sorry i am going to be an advocate for her til the end! SHE DOES HAVE SPECIAL NEEDS and just like we got to ride the front fast pass at Disney for every single line she will get what she needs!

There are many other parents on the squad with no CF issues and the head coach/ex-friend has been totally out of line with. She basically has called hard rules and does not follw them herself. She sends out the wrong field locations and then penalizes the child to sit out and not cheer because the parents took the cheer child to the wrong field in which she instructed. I could go on but it is too much.

Brinly just ABSOLUTELY loves cheer and i am stepping aside a bit until the 2 games that are left are over then she will get a ear full!

Blythe

Mom to Brinly 7 w/CF

don't mess with momma bear- lol</end quote> Like I said before, I sympathize with you here. I think for the people that posted that were a little more critical of the situation, you have to understand you're looking at the balance of a parents perspective (yours) and the experience of an adult cfer (us).

swatterson · Oct 22, 2011

We have been very fortunate with sports. We had a 504 (civil rights apply and yes it does cover this situation). My daughter (homozygous Delta508, CFRD, 50 FEV) is 15, a competitive cheerleader/flyer on an elite team as well as in high school. Her coaches know and fortunately are accomodating when she goes into the hospital. But not all are - we choose a big program that can easily pull another girl into fly if Zoe is out for a month. When she was 7 she was a competitive gymnast until 11 when she got a G-tube - however, even that coach let her know she could come back and compete in any event she wanted to and didn't have to do bars.... I agree with some of the straight talk presented but that is only because Zoe is 15 - I did get as fired up as you when she was 7 - people will discriminate about anything - mean people simply suck. Find another team and I encourage you to start tumbling classes...it will help her cheerleading tremendously. Wish us luck - leaving tomorrow for a competition in Columbus!

swatterson · Oct 22, 2011

We have been very fortunate with sports. We had a 504 (civil rights apply and yes it does cover this situation). My daughter (homozygous Delta508, CFRD, 50 FEV) is 15, a competitive cheerleader/flyer on an elite team as well as in high school. Her coaches know and fortunately are accomodating when she goes into the hospital. But not all are - we choose a big program that can easily pull another girl into fly if Zoe is out for a month. When she was 7 she was a competitive gymnast until 11 when she got a G-tube - however, even that coach let her know she could come back and compete in any event she wanted to and didn't have to do bars.... I agree with some of the straight talk presented but that is only because Zoe is 15 - I did get as fired up as you when she was 7 - people will discriminate about anything - mean people simply suck. Find another team and I encourage you to start tumbling classes...it will help her cheerleading tremendously. Wish us luck - leaving tomorrow for a competition in Columbus!

swatterson · Oct 22, 2011

We have been very fortunate with sports. We had a 504 (civil rights apply and yes it does cover this situation). My daughter (homozygous Delta508, CFRD, 50 FEV) is 15, a competitive cheerleader/flyer on an elite team as well as in high school. Her coaches know and fortunately are accomodating when she goes into the hospital. But not all are - we choose a big program that can easily pull another girl into fly if Zoe is out for a month. When she was 7 she was a competitive gymnast until 11 when she got a G-tube - however, even that coach let her know she could come back and compete in any event she wanted to and didn't have to do bars.... I agree with some of the straight talk presented but that is only because Zoe is 15 - I did get as fired up as you when she was 7 - people will discriminate about anything - mean people simply suck. Find another team and I encourage you to start tumbling classes...it will help her cheerleading tremendously. Wish us luck - leaving tomorrow for a competition in Columbus!

Sports Organization Discriminating against my daughter w/CF

fallenarches

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Mom2Brinly

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Havoc

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mackenziesmom

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mamaScarlett

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swatterson

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