The Fundraising Blues

[jena]

I feel the need to commisserate. Every year, I do fundraising (4th year now) for Great Strides. And every year I end up crying because someone (S) let's me down. It's really stupid because SO MANY MORE PEOPLE are wonderful and amazing and show me how blessed I am. And it's encouraging to see perfect strangers show more kindness than old friends or even family. I promise myself every year, I won't let myself get upset. But every year, I get triggered and end up crying in frustration and disappointment. I am not one to sit around feeling sorry for myself. AND I completely understand that the world does not revolve around me or my son's illness. But I'm just having one of those moments, ya know? And I thought I would come here and check out some of your stories. I'll post a couple of mine.
I am hoping to vent, get this out of my system, and move on! So if you have some stories to share.... bring them on! Misery loves company!
Jena
Son (6) with CF
Daugther (3) no CF

p.s. I will post some of my stories after I pick my son up from school!

 

[jena]

I feel the need to commisserate. Every year, I do fundraising (4th year now) for Great Strides. And every year I end up crying because someone (S) let's me down. It's really stupid because SO MANY MORE PEOPLE are wonderful and amazing and show me how blessed I am. And it's encouraging to see perfect strangers show more kindness than old friends or even family. I promise myself every year, I won't let myself get upset. But every year, I get triggered and end up crying in frustration and disappointment. I am not one to sit around feeling sorry for myself. AND I completely understand that the world does not revolve around me or my son's illness. But I'm just having one of those moments, ya know? And I thought I would come here and check out some of your stories. I'll post a couple of mine.
I am hoping to vent, get this out of my system, and move on! So if you have some stories to share.... bring them on! Misery loves company!
Jena
Son (6) with CF
Daugther (3) no CF

p.s. I will post some of my stories after I pick my son up from school!

 

[jena]

I feel the need to commisserate. Every year, I do fundraising (4th year now) for Great Strides. And every year I end up crying because someone (S) let's me down. It's really stupid because SO MANY MORE PEOPLE are wonderful and amazing and show me how blessed I am. And it's encouraging to see perfect strangers show more kindness than old friends or even family. I promise myself every year, I won't let myself get upset. But every year, I get triggered and end up crying in frustration and disappointment. I am not one to sit around feeling sorry for myself. AND I completely understand that the world does not revolve around me or my son's illness. But I'm just having one of those moments, ya know? And I thought I would come here and check out some of your stories. I'll post a couple of mine.
I am hoping to vent, get this out of my system, and move on! So if you have some stories to share.... bring them on! Misery loves company!
Jena
Son (6) with CF
Daugther (3) no CF

p.s. I will post some of my stories after I pick my son up from school!

 

[NoExcuses]

If I did'nt focus on the positive instead of the negative in my every day life, I wouldn't be able to get out of bed in the morning.

Everytime you think of your frustrationgs, re-read what you just typed - so many strangers helped you in your fundraising quest.

That's the only way you're going to be able to keep on...


-25/wcf

 

[NoExcuses]

If I did'nt focus on the positive instead of the negative in my every day life, I wouldn't be able to get out of bed in the morning.

Everytime you think of your frustrationgs, re-read what you just typed - so many strangers helped you in your fundraising quest.

That's the only way you're going to be able to keep on...


-25/wcf

 

[NoExcuses]

If I did'nt focus on the positive instead of the negative in my every day life, I wouldn't be able to get out of bed in the morning.

Everytime you think of your frustrationgs, re-read what you just typed - so many strangers helped you in your fundraising quest.

That's the only way you're going to be able to keep on...


-25/wcf

 

[Ratatosk]

I hear you -- I send out 90-100 letters, 30 emails and I've gotten very generous donations from complete strangers. But family, coworkers, close friends....nada.

It's the family members and coworkers who continue to let me down. Don't tell me the check is in the mail -- 'cuz it's not. Don't try to make yourself feel better by saying "oh, darn, I missed your walk" -- 'cuz guess what, we'll take your money anyway. <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-smile.gif" border="0"> And don't sign up for the walk, tell us that you're going to have a fundraiser, get food donations, etc. thru your business and then disappear. Don't tell us that you're going to get a team together at your company and drop the ball. Just don't say anything -- don't commit, please don't bother.

And it's not just me that get told these fibs -- my inlaws and parents are told by their friends that they plan to be at the walk, donate money, help volunteer and walk day comes around and we don't hear from any of them.

Then there are my coworkers --- Guess what, next time you ask for a donation for your cause, I'll tell you exactly why I'm not donating to yours -- because I've bought magazine subscriptions, wrapping paper, popcorn, raffle tickets I don't want or need because I know how difficult it is to ask people for money. But you don't reciprocate, so neither will I.

My own mother was ranting about how selfish her sister & niece (my aunt & cousin) were -- always bragging about how much money they earn, yet never ever donate. And then she apologized. I practically bit my tongue off 'cuz I could relate -- my own sister -- has never made an effort to meet DS. And always promises to donate money -- heck, I don't care if she donates money -- volunteer at a CF event -- they have bowling tourneys, the gala, the walk....

Sigh. Feeling much better after this vent.

 

[Ratatosk]

I hear you -- I send out 90-100 letters, 30 emails and I've gotten very generous donations from complete strangers. But family, coworkers, close friends....nada.

It's the family members and coworkers who continue to let me down. Don't tell me the check is in the mail -- 'cuz it's not. Don't try to make yourself feel better by saying "oh, darn, I missed your walk" -- 'cuz guess what, we'll take your money anyway. <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-smile.gif" border="0"> And don't sign up for the walk, tell us that you're going to have a fundraiser, get food donations, etc. thru your business and then disappear. Don't tell us that you're going to get a team together at your company and drop the ball. Just don't say anything -- don't commit, please don't bother.

And it's not just me that get told these fibs -- my inlaws and parents are told by their friends that they plan to be at the walk, donate money, help volunteer and walk day comes around and we don't hear from any of them.

Then there are my coworkers --- Guess what, next time you ask for a donation for your cause, I'll tell you exactly why I'm not donating to yours -- because I've bought magazine subscriptions, wrapping paper, popcorn, raffle tickets I don't want or need because I know how difficult it is to ask people for money. But you don't reciprocate, so neither will I.

My own mother was ranting about how selfish her sister & niece (my aunt & cousin) were -- always bragging about how much money they earn, yet never ever donate. And then she apologized. I practically bit my tongue off 'cuz I could relate -- my own sister -- has never made an effort to meet DS. And always promises to donate money -- heck, I don't care if she donates money -- volunteer at a CF event -- they have bowling tourneys, the gala, the walk....

Sigh. Feeling much better after this vent.

 

[Ratatosk]

I hear you -- I send out 90-100 letters, 30 emails and I've gotten very generous donations from complete strangers. But family, coworkers, close friends....nada.

It's the family members and coworkers who continue to let me down. Don't tell me the check is in the mail -- 'cuz it's not. Don't try to make yourself feel better by saying "oh, darn, I missed your walk" -- 'cuz guess what, we'll take your money anyway. <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-smile.gif" border="0"> And don't sign up for the walk, tell us that you're going to have a fundraiser, get food donations, etc. thru your business and then disappear. Don't tell us that you're going to get a team together at your company and drop the ball. Just don't say anything -- don't commit, please don't bother.

And it's not just me that get told these fibs -- my inlaws and parents are told by their friends that they plan to be at the walk, donate money, help volunteer and walk day comes around and we don't hear from any of them.

Then there are my coworkers --- Guess what, next time you ask for a donation for your cause, I'll tell you exactly why I'm not donating to yours -- because I've bought magazine subscriptions, wrapping paper, popcorn, raffle tickets I don't want or need because I know how difficult it is to ask people for money. But you don't reciprocate, so neither will I.

My own mother was ranting about how selfish her sister & niece (my aunt & cousin) were -- always bragging about how much money they earn, yet never ever donate. And then she apologized. I practically bit my tongue off 'cuz I could relate -- my own sister -- has never made an effort to meet DS. And always promises to donate money -- heck, I don't care if she donates money -- volunteer at a CF event -- they have bowling tourneys, the gala, the walk....

Sigh. Feeling much better after this vent.

 

[Mommafirst]

This is our first Great Strides, and I am feeling somewhat like you. I have encountered amazingly generous people that make me feel so good to know them, and yet there are a handful of people that I thought would totally be supportive that have totally failed me.

I haven't figured out why this is so dissappointing, as the positives here sooo outweigh the negatives, but some people can really let you down.

Sorry, I just wanted to let you know you aren't alone.

 

[Mommafirst]

This is our first Great Strides, and I am feeling somewhat like you. I have encountered amazingly generous people that make me feel so good to know them, and yet there are a handful of people that I thought would totally be supportive that have totally failed me.

I haven't figured out why this is so dissappointing, as the positives here sooo outweigh the negatives, but some people can really let you down.

Sorry, I just wanted to let you know you aren't alone.

 

[Mommafirst]

This is our first Great Strides, and I am feeling somewhat like you. I have encountered amazingly generous people that make me feel so good to know them, and yet there are a handful of people that I thought would totally be supportive that have totally failed me.

I haven't figured out why this is so dissappointing, as the positives here sooo outweigh the negatives, but some people can really let you down.

Sorry, I just wanted to let you know you aren't alone.

 

[Ratatosk]

And really, I can't dwell on the negative. Maybe we just feel so bad, because we KNOW that should roles be reversed that we'd be the first ones to step up to the plate to volunteer, donate money...

I am so fortunate to be surrounded by a great group of friends and relatives.

The cancer survivor whose busy getting her chiropractic business back up and running who apologized ?!! for not raising as much money as she has in previous years.

The woman on a fixed income who has buttons made every year with DS's photo on them and the Team Name on them.

Our friend whom we fondly refer to as "the manny" who has endured dirty diapers (not anymore) and watching telletubbies on the big screen, while DS systematically destroys his neat as a pin house, so we're able to attend Great Strides meetings.

And the numerous, unsolicited donations from complete strangers. The night before the walk -- I received $150 in checks from two CEOs of businesses, whom I dealt with years ago. I feel so incredibly blessed!

 

[Ratatosk]

And really, I can't dwell on the negative. Maybe we just feel so bad, because we KNOW that should roles be reversed that we'd be the first ones to step up to the plate to volunteer, donate money...

I am so fortunate to be surrounded by a great group of friends and relatives.

The cancer survivor whose busy getting her chiropractic business back up and running who apologized ?!! for not raising as much money as she has in previous years.

The woman on a fixed income who has buttons made every year with DS's photo on them and the Team Name on them.

Our friend whom we fondly refer to as "the manny" who has endured dirty diapers (not anymore) and watching telletubbies on the big screen, while DS systematically destroys his neat as a pin house, so we're able to attend Great Strides meetings.

And the numerous, unsolicited donations from complete strangers. The night before the walk -- I received $150 in checks from two CEOs of businesses, whom I dealt with years ago. I feel so incredibly blessed!

 

[Ratatosk]

And really, I can't dwell on the negative. Maybe we just feel so bad, because we KNOW that should roles be reversed that we'd be the first ones to step up to the plate to volunteer, donate money...

I am so fortunate to be surrounded by a great group of friends and relatives.

The cancer survivor whose busy getting her chiropractic business back up and running who apologized ?!! for not raising as much money as she has in previous years.

The woman on a fixed income who has buttons made every year with DS's photo on them and the Team Name on them.

Our friend whom we fondly refer to as "the manny" who has endured dirty diapers (not anymore) and watching telletubbies on the big screen, while DS systematically destroys his neat as a pin house, so we're able to attend Great Strides meetings.

And the numerous, unsolicited donations from complete strangers. The night before the walk -- I received $150 in checks from two CEOs of businesses, whom I dealt with years ago. I feel so incredibly blessed!

 

[tammykrumrey]

This can be frustrating to us when it comes from our own family members. I especially have a difficult time with a few of my first cousins, whom I considered myself being very close to. Both of them had instances in which they had a child who was going through testing for CF, and were completely freaked out! They would come to me with concerns and share how scared they were. Only to find out they had perfectly healthy children, (which I was very happy for them.) But yet, they never offer to help out at any event we hold. I do several outside of the foundation, raising about $40-50,000/year outside of the CFF events, so there are many chances to just volunteer their time. But they don't. I just want to say, do you remember how scared you were when you thought your child had CF?

But I am all in all blessed with a lot of wonderful people in my life to help in our fundraising events. And a lot of the times it is from people who you would never expect.

It just gets frustrating when blood is supposed to be thicker than water<img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-smile.gif" border="0"> I just don't let it get in my way of my goals.

 

[tammykrumrey]

This can be frustrating to us when it comes from our own family members. I especially have a difficult time with a few of my first cousins, whom I considered myself being very close to. Both of them had instances in which they had a child who was going through testing for CF, and were completely freaked out! They would come to me with concerns and share how scared they were. Only to find out they had perfectly healthy children, (which I was very happy for them.) But yet, they never offer to help out at any event we hold. I do several outside of the foundation, raising about $40-50,000/year outside of the CFF events, so there are many chances to just volunteer their time. But they don't. I just want to say, do you remember how scared you were when you thought your child had CF?

But I am all in all blessed with a lot of wonderful people in my life to help in our fundraising events. And a lot of the times it is from people who you would never expect.

It just gets frustrating when blood is supposed to be thicker than water<img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-smile.gif" border="0"> I just don't let it get in my way of my goals.

 

[tammykrumrey]

This can be frustrating to us when it comes from our own family members. I especially have a difficult time with a few of my first cousins, whom I considered myself being very close to. Both of them had instances in which they had a child who was going through testing for CF, and were completely freaked out! They would come to me with concerns and share how scared they were. Only to find out they had perfectly healthy children, (which I was very happy for them.) But yet, they never offer to help out at any event we hold. I do several outside of the foundation, raising about $40-50,000/year outside of the CFF events, so there are many chances to just volunteer their time. But they don't. I just want to say, do you remember how scared you were when you thought your child had CF?

But I am all in all blessed with a lot of wonderful people in my life to help in our fundraising events. And a lot of the times it is from people who you would never expect.

It just gets frustrating when blood is supposed to be thicker than water<img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-smile.gif" border="0"> I just don't let it get in my way of my goals.

 

[jena]

Feeling so much better seeing your posts. Now I have a few stories to get off of my shoulders. AGAIN, I'm not dwelling on the negative, but some of this stuff has been eating at me. Sometimes, in order to let something go, you have to let it out first. I can tell so many stories of generosity, but it's those negative stories I need to purge from my system <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-smile.gif" border="0">

A close friend of over 10 years. She was worried about her child's CF status at one time because my friend learned that she is a carrier. Husband turned out not to be a carrier (and daughter is thriving). I sent information 2 years in a row - no response. Not just no donation, but not even an acknowledgement. Then, she turns around a few months later and repeatedly asks me to attend her Mary Kay events (brand new job venture as a consultant) because she wants to someday "drive that pink cadillac". Nice goal... she couldn't give me a second glance when I asked for help saving my son's life, but now I'm supposed to help her reach her lofty goal of getting a new car.

More to follow!
Jena

 

[jena]

Feeling so much better seeing your posts. Now I have a few stories to get off of my shoulders. AGAIN, I'm not dwelling on the negative, but some of this stuff has been eating at me. Sometimes, in order to let something go, you have to let it out first. I can tell so many stories of generosity, but it's those negative stories I need to purge from my system <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-smile.gif" border="0">

A close friend of over 10 years. She was worried about her child's CF status at one time because my friend learned that she is a carrier. Husband turned out not to be a carrier (and daughter is thriving). I sent information 2 years in a row - no response. Not just no donation, but not even an acknowledgement. Then, she turns around a few months later and repeatedly asks me to attend her Mary Kay events (brand new job venture as a consultant) because she wants to someday "drive that pink cadillac". Nice goal... she couldn't give me a second glance when I asked for help saving my son's life, but now I'm supposed to help her reach her lofty goal of getting a new car.

More to follow!
Jena