To speak of CF or not...

[JRPandTJP]

Well yesterday was the day from hell. Ben is being VERY 2 these days so tantrums and strong headedness abounds. He is just very short tempered right now. So mommy patience is at a minimum and I am fried by the day's end. Thankfully he is my second and I know it will pass.

So a bit frazzled I take my daughter to ice skating yesterday. As if my ESP my mom calls to say she'd like Ben to come over for the afternoon so I could have some time with just my daughter. I was so excited. So this group is great, some real great moms to chat with during class while the kids are skating. Well, we were talking about the challenges of doing something focused with an older child when the little ones aren't ready to focus or settle. One lady suggested a mother's helper from time to time and wondered if we used babysitters every with our son. Without thinking I said well we only use our parents right now because he had such a tough start at life we haven't felt too comfortable yet using younger sitters. Well, this opens the whole thing up and I find myself having the agonizing conversation I've come to dread about what is CF and what we do daily for him....blah blah. So innocently the one lady asks if I've every read this authors books about her 2 daughters and how they died from CF!!! I told her I just can't read those kinds of books...then the flood gates open. Here I am in ICE LAND crying about CF.

Now, this is my fault, I see that clearly, but would you tell a parent of a child fighting cancer to read a book about a family that lost children to the disease? I think she felt horrible and I definatley felt embarressed. Do you just avoid ever bringing up CF to non-CF people? How do you keep something that feels so big to you out of conversation so you don't have to go "there"?

Does any one else relate here? Just looking for a shoulder I guess. I thought I had passed this stage of random tears. Guess not.

Warmly,
Jody

 

[JRPandTJP]

Well yesterday was the day from hell. Ben is being VERY 2 these days so tantrums and strong headedness abounds. He is just very short tempered right now. So mommy patience is at a minimum and I am fried by the day's end. Thankfully he is my second and I know it will pass.

So a bit frazzled I take my daughter to ice skating yesterday. As if my ESP my mom calls to say she'd like Ben to come over for the afternoon so I could have some time with just my daughter. I was so excited. So this group is great, some real great moms to chat with during class while the kids are skating. Well, we were talking about the challenges of doing something focused with an older child when the little ones aren't ready to focus or settle. One lady suggested a mother's helper from time to time and wondered if we used babysitters every with our son. Without thinking I said well we only use our parents right now because he had such a tough start at life we haven't felt too comfortable yet using younger sitters. Well, this opens the whole thing up and I find myself having the agonizing conversation I've come to dread about what is CF and what we do daily for him....blah blah. So innocently the one lady asks if I've every read this authors books about her 2 daughters and how they died from CF!!! I told her I just can't read those kinds of books...then the flood gates open. Here I am in ICE LAND crying about CF.

Now, this is my fault, I see that clearly, but would you tell a parent of a child fighting cancer to read a book about a family that lost children to the disease? I think she felt horrible and I definatley felt embarressed. Do you just avoid ever bringing up CF to non-CF people? How do you keep something that feels so big to you out of conversation so you don't have to go "there"?

Does any one else relate here? Just looking for a shoulder I guess. I thought I had passed this stage of random tears. Guess not.

Warmly,
Jody

 

[JRPandTJP]

Well yesterday was the day from hell. Ben is being VERY 2 these days so tantrums and strong headedness abounds. He is just very short tempered right now. So mommy patience is at a minimum and I am fried by the day's end. Thankfully he is my second and I know it will pass.

So a bit frazzled I take my daughter to ice skating yesterday. As if my ESP my mom calls to say she'd like Ben to come over for the afternoon so I could have some time with just my daughter. I was so excited. So this group is great, some real great moms to chat with during class while the kids are skating. Well, we were talking about the challenges of doing something focused with an older child when the little ones aren't ready to focus or settle. One lady suggested a mother's helper from time to time and wondered if we used babysitters every with our son. Without thinking I said well we only use our parents right now because he had such a tough start at life we haven't felt too comfortable yet using younger sitters. Well, this opens the whole thing up and I find myself having the agonizing conversation I've come to dread about what is CF and what we do daily for him....blah blah. So innocently the one lady asks if I've every read this authors books about her 2 daughters and how they died from CF!!! I told her I just can't read those kinds of books...then the flood gates open. Here I am in ICE LAND crying about CF.

Now, this is my fault, I see that clearly, but would you tell a parent of a child fighting cancer to read a book about a family that lost children to the disease? I think she felt horrible and I definatley felt embarressed. Do you just avoid ever bringing up CF to non-CF people? How do you keep something that feels so big to you out of conversation so you don't have to go "there"?

Does any one else relate here? Just looking for a shoulder I guess. I thought I had passed this stage of random tears. Guess not.

Warmly,
Jody

 

[wanderlost]

I'm not a mom to a Cfer but I am a Cfer and I usually do not tell. That's my personal thing - I find it easier not to, as people have a lot of misconceptions about CF - they all seem to remember only the horror stories, and sadly, there really is not a lot of positive Cf infor out there, so you have to counteract that. Though it might be nice to educate people on CF, honestly, I don't have the energy. Also, I hate the pity you get from people. I don't feel sorry for myself and I don't want someone else to feel sorry for me. I think that if my kids had Cf I would still be selective on who I told for the same reasons. It is a personal choice to tell or not to tell, and I think whatever makes you more comfrotable. I hate the Cf conversation, so I try to avoid it, others like to clear the air. You'll probably find as you deal with this disease longer that you get more aware of sensing which people you want to tell and which you want to avoid telling. Good luck!

 

[wanderlost]

I'm not a mom to a Cfer but I am a Cfer and I usually do not tell. That's my personal thing - I find it easier not to, as people have a lot of misconceptions about CF - they all seem to remember only the horror stories, and sadly, there really is not a lot of positive Cf infor out there, so you have to counteract that. Though it might be nice to educate people on CF, honestly, I don't have the energy. Also, I hate the pity you get from people. I don't feel sorry for myself and I don't want someone else to feel sorry for me. I think that if my kids had Cf I would still be selective on who I told for the same reasons. It is a personal choice to tell or not to tell, and I think whatever makes you more comfrotable. I hate the Cf conversation, so I try to avoid it, others like to clear the air. You'll probably find as you deal with this disease longer that you get more aware of sensing which people you want to tell and which you want to avoid telling. Good luck!

 

[wanderlost]

I'm not a mom to a Cfer but I am a Cfer and I usually do not tell. That's my personal thing - I find it easier not to, as people have a lot of misconceptions about CF - they all seem to remember only the horror stories, and sadly, there really is not a lot of positive Cf infor out there, so you have to counteract that. Though it might be nice to educate people on CF, honestly, I don't have the energy. Also, I hate the pity you get from people. I don't feel sorry for myself and I don't want someone else to feel sorry for me. I think that if my kids had Cf I would still be selective on who I told for the same reasons. It is a personal choice to tell or not to tell, and I think whatever makes you more comfrotable. I hate the Cf conversation, so I try to avoid it, others like to clear the air. You'll probably find as you deal with this disease longer that you get more aware of sensing which people you want to tell and which you want to avoid telling. Good luck!

 

[Ratatosk]

I usually do the "our son had a difficult start and requires a few things carewise". This is usually in response to aquaintenances, neighbors asking me when we're going to have a little brother or sister for him. If they push, I usually just say, because of what happened to DS shortly after he was born -- most know he had a bowel obstruction and was in the nicu for 6 weeks -- there's a 25% that could happen to any subsequent children.

It's not that I'm ashamed of CF and I will do the quicky intro to CF talk, but when people have no tact or I can tell they're asking questions they really don't care to hear answer to, I keep the conversation brief. I hate the look of pity in their eyes or when they look away in avoidance (deer caught in the headlights) -- embarrassed 'cuz they didn't know and now want nothing more to do but escape from me.

My teary moments are church for some stupid reason. Calm, cool collected most times -- take me to church and I'm an idiot. Sometimes it's a scripture lesson, a song -- I never know for sure what's going to set me off. L

 

[Ratatosk]

I usually do the "our son had a difficult start and requires a few things carewise". This is usually in response to aquaintenances, neighbors asking me when we're going to have a little brother or sister for him. If they push, I usually just say, because of what happened to DS shortly after he was born -- most know he had a bowel obstruction and was in the nicu for 6 weeks -- there's a 25% that could happen to any subsequent children.

It's not that I'm ashamed of CF and I will do the quicky intro to CF talk, but when people have no tact or I can tell they're asking questions they really don't care to hear answer to, I keep the conversation brief. I hate the look of pity in their eyes or when they look away in avoidance (deer caught in the headlights) -- embarrassed 'cuz they didn't know and now want nothing more to do but escape from me.

My teary moments are church for some stupid reason. Calm, cool collected most times -- take me to church and I'm an idiot. Sometimes it's a scripture lesson, a song -- I never know for sure what's going to set me off. L

 

[Ratatosk]

I usually do the "our son had a difficult start and requires a few things carewise". This is usually in response to aquaintenances, neighbors asking me when we're going to have a little brother or sister for him. If they push, I usually just say, because of what happened to DS shortly after he was born -- most know he had a bowel obstruction and was in the nicu for 6 weeks -- there's a 25% that could happen to any subsequent children.

It's not that I'm ashamed of CF and I will do the quicky intro to CF talk, but when people have no tact or I can tell they're asking questions they really don't care to hear answer to, I keep the conversation brief. I hate the look of pity in their eyes or when they look away in avoidance (deer caught in the headlights) -- embarrassed 'cuz they didn't know and now want nothing more to do but escape from me.

My teary moments are church for some stupid reason. Calm, cool collected most times -- take me to church and I'm an idiot. Sometimes it's a scripture lesson, a song -- I never know for sure what's going to set me off. L

 

[cfmomma]

I took my son to the regular pediatrician, she wasn't in but the nurse practitioner was, for an ear-infection several years ago. We talked about CF and whether I wanted to have more kids in the future. She then told me that a good friend of hers had five little girls and they all died of CF. I could not believe she could be so insensitive!!! I held it in until I got in my car, but I was depressed for days. I spend so much time forcing myself to not think about death that when someone mentions it it feels like a slap in the face. I'm not in denial, but in order for me to function like a normal parent I have to block those thoughts out. It pisses me off when someone "nonchalantly" knocks down my wall. I have no problem talking about CF to someone that doesn't think they "know" everything. I try to inform them without freaking them out or making them take pity on my son.

Liza, church is the hardest for me also. I can't put up a wall with God and have yet to get through a service without feeling that huge lump in my throat. I don't go to church as much as I should because my poor hands can't take it. I clench my fists so tight, trying not to sob out load, that my fingernails literally cut through the skin. Not a healthy way to deal with my emotions, but I have a huge fear of crying in front of anybody.

 

[cfmomma]

I took my son to the regular pediatrician, she wasn't in but the nurse practitioner was, for an ear-infection several years ago. We talked about CF and whether I wanted to have more kids in the future. She then told me that a good friend of hers had five little girls and they all died of CF. I could not believe she could be so insensitive!!! I held it in until I got in my car, but I was depressed for days. I spend so much time forcing myself to not think about death that when someone mentions it it feels like a slap in the face. I'm not in denial, but in order for me to function like a normal parent I have to block those thoughts out. It pisses me off when someone "nonchalantly" knocks down my wall. I have no problem talking about CF to someone that doesn't think they "know" everything. I try to inform them without freaking them out or making them take pity on my son.

Liza, church is the hardest for me also. I can't put up a wall with God and have yet to get through a service without feeling that huge lump in my throat. I don't go to church as much as I should because my poor hands can't take it. I clench my fists so tight, trying not to sob out load, that my fingernails literally cut through the skin. Not a healthy way to deal with my emotions, but I have a huge fear of crying in front of anybody.

 

[cfmomma]

I took my son to the regular pediatrician, she wasn't in but the nurse practitioner was, for an ear-infection several years ago. We talked about CF and whether I wanted to have more kids in the future. She then told me that a good friend of hers had five little girls and they all died of CF. I could not believe she could be so insensitive!!! I held it in until I got in my car, but I was depressed for days. I spend so much time forcing myself to not think about death that when someone mentions it it feels like a slap in the face. I'm not in denial, but in order for me to function like a normal parent I have to block those thoughts out. It pisses me off when someone "nonchalantly" knocks down my wall. I have no problem talking about CF to someone that doesn't think they "know" everything. I try to inform them without freaking them out or making them take pity on my son.

Liza, church is the hardest for me also. I can't put up a wall with God and have yet to get through a service without feeling that huge lump in my throat. I don't go to church as much as I should because my poor hands can't take it. I clench my fists so tight, trying not to sob out load, that my fingernails literally cut through the skin. Not a healthy way to deal with my emotions, but I have a huge fear of crying in front of anybody.

 

[coltsfan715]

I am also not a parent with CF - but a person with CF.

Throughout high school and up until recent years I either did not mention CF - except to close friends and family - or I minimized the severity of it. I also did not like the pity looks or behavior I would get from people. I did not like being treated differently as most people in high school tried to do when they found out I had CF - until I told them not too.

As I have gotten older it is much easier to talk about. I have also found that people are more understanding. Most people care - even though yes they get uncomfortable when you mention that you have an illness that is most likely going to kill you. I have had people make many comments without thinking - things like OH you have CF (when they find out) does that mean you are going to die? Or Something like I am SOOOO sorry - and when I say there is no need for you to be sorry it isn't your fault - then they will say yeah but ... then they pause like ugh oh I don't want to finish what I was going to say. I will just look at them and say what .. yeah but it is going to kill me or yeah but you are sorry I am going to die?

I think everyone has there comfort zone. Most people that do not deal with chronic illnesses do not know how to respond to someone that has an illness or in your case someone with a child with an illness. I try to let most comments roll off my back in that respect because unless the comment seems intentionally hurtful - I can bet that it was most likely said with good intentions. Often times people reach for anyway they can think of to connect with someone. In your case the mother that mentioned the book probably wasn't thinking yeah read this book about a lady who had 2 kids pass from CF. She was probably thinking Oh I read a good book about a woman with 2 kids with CF - maybe you would like it. In an odd way it is a way for her to connect with you through CF.

I don't know. As for bringing it up - it is very situational. If I think the person is genuinely interested I will talk about it. If not then I steer clear of the topic. As for getting upset. I am sorry I can't offer much advice about that. I know for me it is worse at certain times and easier during others. Alot of it has to do with the current situation my health is in. The worse I am the more emotional I tend to be when talking about CF or dealing with CF related issues.

Have a Great Day!
Lindsey

 

[coltsfan715]

I am also not a parent with CF - but a person with CF.

Throughout high school and up until recent years I either did not mention CF - except to close friends and family - or I minimized the severity of it. I also did not like the pity looks or behavior I would get from people. I did not like being treated differently as most people in high school tried to do when they found out I had CF - until I told them not too.

As I have gotten older it is much easier to talk about. I have also found that people are more understanding. Most people care - even though yes they get uncomfortable when you mention that you have an illness that is most likely going to kill you. I have had people make many comments without thinking - things like OH you have CF (when they find out) does that mean you are going to die? Or Something like I am SOOOO sorry - and when I say there is no need for you to be sorry it isn't your fault - then they will say yeah but ... then they pause like ugh oh I don't want to finish what I was going to say. I will just look at them and say what .. yeah but it is going to kill me or yeah but you are sorry I am going to die?

I think everyone has there comfort zone. Most people that do not deal with chronic illnesses do not know how to respond to someone that has an illness or in your case someone with a child with an illness. I try to let most comments roll off my back in that respect because unless the comment seems intentionally hurtful - I can bet that it was most likely said with good intentions. Often times people reach for anyway they can think of to connect with someone. In your case the mother that mentioned the book probably wasn't thinking yeah read this book about a lady who had 2 kids pass from CF. She was probably thinking Oh I read a good book about a woman with 2 kids with CF - maybe you would like it. In an odd way it is a way for her to connect with you through CF.

I don't know. As for bringing it up - it is very situational. If I think the person is genuinely interested I will talk about it. If not then I steer clear of the topic. As for getting upset. I am sorry I can't offer much advice about that. I know for me it is worse at certain times and easier during others. Alot of it has to do with the current situation my health is in. The worse I am the more emotional I tend to be when talking about CF or dealing with CF related issues.

Have a Great Day!
Lindsey

 

[coltsfan715]

I am also not a parent with CF - but a person with CF.

Throughout high school and up until recent years I either did not mention CF - except to close friends and family - or I minimized the severity of it. I also did not like the pity looks or behavior I would get from people. I did not like being treated differently as most people in high school tried to do when they found out I had CF - until I told them not too.

As I have gotten older it is much easier to talk about. I have also found that people are more understanding. Most people care - even though yes they get uncomfortable when you mention that you have an illness that is most likely going to kill you. I have had people make many comments without thinking - things like OH you have CF (when they find out) does that mean you are going to die? Or Something like I am SOOOO sorry - and when I say there is no need for you to be sorry it isn't your fault - then they will say yeah but ... then they pause like ugh oh I don't want to finish what I was going to say. I will just look at them and say what .. yeah but it is going to kill me or yeah but you are sorry I am going to die?

I think everyone has there comfort zone. Most people that do not deal with chronic illnesses do not know how to respond to someone that has an illness or in your case someone with a child with an illness. I try to let most comments roll off my back in that respect because unless the comment seems intentionally hurtful - I can bet that it was most likely said with good intentions. Often times people reach for anyway they can think of to connect with someone. In your case the mother that mentioned the book probably wasn't thinking yeah read this book about a lady who had 2 kids pass from CF. She was probably thinking Oh I read a good book about a woman with 2 kids with CF - maybe you would like it. In an odd way it is a way for her to connect with you through CF.

I don't know. As for bringing it up - it is very situational. If I think the person is genuinely interested I will talk about it. If not then I steer clear of the topic. As for getting upset. I am sorry I can't offer much advice about that. I know for me it is worse at certain times and easier during others. Alot of it has to do with the current situation my health is in. The worse I am the more emotional I tend to be when talking about CF or dealing with CF related issues.

Have a Great Day!
Lindsey

 

[DEES4]

Gosh...this is such a big issue for me. I personally have only told a few close friends and my family about Sawyer being diagnosed with cf. My neighbors also know....mainly because I wanted them to understand why I am so paranoid about him being around anyone that even has a runny nose!! I just don't like for him or us to be pitied. I did tell the guy at the health food store today. I felt yuck when I left....I could just see the look of sorrow in his eyes and it just made me sad. I know so many people don't know what cf is....I know I didn't have a clue before my son was diagnosed. I feel like I have to go into this long discussion with people and explain what cf is and I just usually don't feel like going there. Just like Liza said....I usually just tell people he a rough start and leave it at that. Especially when he was so small for his age and I would get the wonderful remarks from people that he was so little. It would make me so mad and I would just say he had a rough start.
I do know exactly what you mean about the terrible twos! Sawyer is also a complete cut up and he is a "little" spoiled. So our outings these days are very short! My mother usually keeps him one day a week and it is wonderful for my sanity. She is the only person I can leave him with and not worry. She knows how to do his meds and treatments...so I can totally relax and know he is in very capable hands.
Just know you are not alone in all of this. I still cry out of the blue sometimes and I never know when it will hit or what will set me off! I guess it's just part of being a mother to a very special child!
Oh Yeah.....I think it was just awful for that lady to ask you if you had read that book about the children that died with cf. We had a similar situation happen to us. I took Sawyer to the allergy doctor and the nurse informed me that she had a cousin with cf that died at an early age. Why do people feel its their responsiblity to inform us of such things? I am not stupid and I know the reality of cf. I think it is rude and just plain mean when people do those kinds of things.
Carrie

 

[DEES4]

Gosh...this is such a big issue for me. I personally have only told a few close friends and my family about Sawyer being diagnosed with cf. My neighbors also know....mainly because I wanted them to understand why I am so paranoid about him being around anyone that even has a runny nose!! I just don't like for him or us to be pitied. I did tell the guy at the health food store today. I felt yuck when I left....I could just see the look of sorrow in his eyes and it just made me sad. I know so many people don't know what cf is....I know I didn't have a clue before my son was diagnosed. I feel like I have to go into this long discussion with people and explain what cf is and I just usually don't feel like going there. Just like Liza said....I usually just tell people he a rough start and leave it at that. Especially when he was so small for his age and I would get the wonderful remarks from people that he was so little. It would make me so mad and I would just say he had a rough start.
I do know exactly what you mean about the terrible twos! Sawyer is also a complete cut up and he is a "little" spoiled. So our outings these days are very short! My mother usually keeps him one day a week and it is wonderful for my sanity. She is the only person I can leave him with and not worry. She knows how to do his meds and treatments...so I can totally relax and know he is in very capable hands.
Just know you are not alone in all of this. I still cry out of the blue sometimes and I never know when it will hit or what will set me off! I guess it's just part of being a mother to a very special child!
Oh Yeah.....I think it was just awful for that lady to ask you if you had read that book about the children that died with cf. We had a similar situation happen to us. I took Sawyer to the allergy doctor and the nurse informed me that she had a cousin with cf that died at an early age. Why do people feel its their responsiblity to inform us of such things? I am not stupid and I know the reality of cf. I think it is rude and just plain mean when people do those kinds of things.
Carrie

 

[DEES4]

Gosh...this is such a big issue for me. I personally have only told a few close friends and my family about Sawyer being diagnosed with cf. My neighbors also know....mainly because I wanted them to understand why I am so paranoid about him being around anyone that even has a runny nose!! I just don't like for him or us to be pitied. I did tell the guy at the health food store today. I felt yuck when I left....I could just see the look of sorrow in his eyes and it just made me sad. I know so many people don't know what cf is....I know I didn't have a clue before my son was diagnosed. I feel like I have to go into this long discussion with people and explain what cf is and I just usually don't feel like going there. Just like Liza said....I usually just tell people he a rough start and leave it at that. Especially when he was so small for his age and I would get the wonderful remarks from people that he was so little. It would make me so mad and I would just say he had a rough start.
I do know exactly what you mean about the terrible twos! Sawyer is also a complete cut up and he is a "little" spoiled. So our outings these days are very short! My mother usually keeps him one day a week and it is wonderful for my sanity. She is the only person I can leave him with and not worry. She knows how to do his meds and treatments...so I can totally relax and know he is in very capable hands.
Just know you are not alone in all of this. I still cry out of the blue sometimes and I never know when it will hit or what will set me off! I guess it's just part of being a mother to a very special child!
Oh Yeah.....I think it was just awful for that lady to ask you if you had read that book about the children that died with cf. We had a similar situation happen to us. I took Sawyer to the allergy doctor and the nurse informed me that she had a cousin with cf that died at an early age. Why do people feel its their responsiblity to inform us of such things? I am not stupid and I know the reality of cf. I think it is rude and just plain mean when people do those kinds of things.
Carrie

 

[ktsmom]

Jody - I was warned by a mom who has a Down Syndrome child that people would say some STUPID things!

We have a similar situation, but my tears (and frustration) about speaking of CF happen when people offer support and kindness!

As word has gotten around the school where my daughters attend, parents have approached me at football games and other school functions offering support, sympathy, etc. Sometimes I can hold it together and sometimes I can't - usually at the point in the conversation when they look me dead in the eye and say "and how are YOU doing?"

Last night was the Fall Carnival and a very very kind mom, who is also a physician, asked me if I was on anti-depressants when I started to finally tear-up during our conversation. And told me that I should be on them when I told her no I wasn't! This is our reality now, and I'm not going to try to medicate myself through it. (I did use Xanax to help me through the first 30 days or so). Can you spell anxiety?

And today during Katy's parent-teacher conference (for preschool! LOL!) I clutched a McDonald's napkin in my hand for the inevitable - yup, when the teacher told me that folks wanted to help and what kind of help did we need, I broke down and said I was saving that (asking for help) for what I feel is inevitable - some day Katy may have to be hospitalized for IV's or whatever.

To any non-parents reading this, you may think that I think it is all about me. It's not; I know that. It's just very complicated.


Dana
Mom to Katy (3, cf) and Kyra (6, no cf)

 

[ktsmom]

Jody - I was warned by a mom who has a Down Syndrome child that people would say some STUPID things!

We have a similar situation, but my tears (and frustration) about speaking of CF happen when people offer support and kindness!

As word has gotten around the school where my daughters attend, parents have approached me at football games and other school functions offering support, sympathy, etc. Sometimes I can hold it together and sometimes I can't - usually at the point in the conversation when they look me dead in the eye and say "and how are YOU doing?"

Last night was the Fall Carnival and a very very kind mom, who is also a physician, asked me if I was on anti-depressants when I started to finally tear-up during our conversation. And told me that I should be on them when I told her no I wasn't! This is our reality now, and I'm not going to try to medicate myself through it. (I did use Xanax to help me through the first 30 days or so). Can you spell anxiety?

And today during Katy's parent-teacher conference (for preschool! LOL!) I clutched a McDonald's napkin in my hand for the inevitable - yup, when the teacher told me that folks wanted to help and what kind of help did we need, I broke down and said I was saving that (asking for help) for what I feel is inevitable - some day Katy may have to be hospitalized for IV's or whatever.

To any non-parents reading this, you may think that I think it is all about me. It's not; I know that. It's just very complicated.


Dana
Mom to Katy (3, cf) and Kyra (6, no cf)