vasectomy for hubby

M

maryann

New member
Thank all of ya'll for your stories. You all have beautiful children.
I also feel like it is harder for me than my husband. Before we got the results, we had decided what we needed to do and I told him not to let me change my mind if it came to that. But now, of course, I just can't stand the thought of NEVER having the option. I'm 26!! Who decides at 26 never to have more children. I know we are so blessed to have our daughter and that she's healthy. I feel like this is so unfair. I know I shouldn't complain when at least I know we're carrires and so many didn't know and now have children with cf. But I've been affected by this my whole life. My sister, Valarie, was 4 1/2 years older than me and was dx about the time I came along. So my whole life IT has been there. While I was pregnant Valarie was in the hospital and I couldn't go see her. I was afraid my baby might have it and just couldn't handle it. I lived 5 hours away, and of course that was a good excuse. And she was in quarintine part of the time. But the bottom line was I just couldn't handle it. Couldn't handle her being sick, her dying, and especially that my baby could have the same thing. I know that sounds incredibly selfish, but I just felt like it was all too much. She died 2 weeks after I had my baby, and we were still waiting on Madeline's(the baby) results at that time. When my mom called to say Valarie had died, the first thought I had was I couldn't go to the funeral. And I didn't. MY mom and aunt both called and said I should stay home and take care of the baby, so that was my "excuse". I had old friends showing up at the visitation and services to support me and I wasn't even there. I know they all had to think I was selfish or just didn't care or at least that not coming was the wrong decision, but I just could't handle it. The funeral was on a Monday morning, and I was rocking my baby watching the Price is Right and just crying the whole time the funeral was going on. THat was two years ago and here I am again. This THING is in my life again.
I'm sorry for going on like that, but no one who hasn't delt with this could ever understand. And Valarie was born in1976 and lived to the age of 29 and I know medicine is so much better now. When she was a kid, she had a medicine called Pancrease, I guess that was enzymes, and my parents did clapping. (A manual alternative to the vest). She never used inhalers or Tobi until she was grown. I know it is much different for kids today with cf, but how hard is it? How good is the medicine?
 
M

maryann

New member
Thank all of ya'll for your stories. You all have beautiful children.
I also feel like it is harder for me than my husband. Before we got the results, we had decided what we needed to do and I told him not to let me change my mind if it came to that. But now, of course, I just can't stand the thought of NEVER having the option. I'm 26!! Who decides at 26 never to have more children. I know we are so blessed to have our daughter and that she's healthy. I feel like this is so unfair. I know I shouldn't complain when at least I know we're carrires and so many didn't know and now have children with cf. But I've been affected by this my whole life. My sister, Valarie, was 4 1/2 years older than me and was dx about the time I came along. So my whole life IT has been there. While I was pregnant Valarie was in the hospital and I couldn't go see her. I was afraid my baby might have it and just couldn't handle it. I lived 5 hours away, and of course that was a good excuse. And she was in quarintine part of the time. But the bottom line was I just couldn't handle it. Couldn't handle her being sick, her dying, and especially that my baby could have the same thing. I know that sounds incredibly selfish, but I just felt like it was all too much. She died 2 weeks after I had my baby, and we were still waiting on Madeline's(the baby) results at that time. When my mom called to say Valarie had died, the first thought I had was I couldn't go to the funeral. And I didn't. MY mom and aunt both called and said I should stay home and take care of the baby, so that was my "excuse". I had old friends showing up at the visitation and services to support me and I wasn't even there. I know they all had to think I was selfish or just didn't care or at least that not coming was the wrong decision, but I just could't handle it. The funeral was on a Monday morning, and I was rocking my baby watching the Price is Right and just crying the whole time the funeral was going on. THat was two years ago and here I am again. This THING is in my life again.
I'm sorry for going on like that, but no one who hasn't delt with this could ever understand. And Valarie was born in1976 and lived to the age of 29 and I know medicine is so much better now. When she was a kid, she had a medicine called Pancrease, I guess that was enzymes, and my parents did clapping. (A manual alternative to the vest). She never used inhalers or Tobi until she was grown. I know it is much different for kids today with cf, but how hard is it? How good is the medicine?
 
M

maryann

New member
Thank all of ya'll for your stories. You all have beautiful children.
I also feel like it is harder for me than my husband. Before we got the results, we had decided what we needed to do and I told him not to let me change my mind if it came to that. But now, of course, I just can't stand the thought of NEVER having the option. I'm 26!! Who decides at 26 never to have more children. I know we are so blessed to have our daughter and that she's healthy. I feel like this is so unfair. I know I shouldn't complain when at least I know we're carrires and so many didn't know and now have children with cf. But I've been affected by this my whole life. My sister, Valarie, was 4 1/2 years older than me and was dx about the time I came along. So my whole life IT has been there. While I was pregnant Valarie was in the hospital and I couldn't go see her. I was afraid my baby might have it and just couldn't handle it. I lived 5 hours away, and of course that was a good excuse. And she was in quarintine part of the time. But the bottom line was I just couldn't handle it. Couldn't handle her being sick, her dying, and especially that my baby could have the same thing. I know that sounds incredibly selfish, but I just felt like it was all too much. She died 2 weeks after I had my baby, and we were still waiting on Madeline's(the baby) results at that time. When my mom called to say Valarie had died, the first thought I had was I couldn't go to the funeral. And I didn't. MY mom and aunt both called and said I should stay home and take care of the baby, so that was my "excuse". I had old friends showing up at the visitation and services to support me and I wasn't even there. I know they all had to think I was selfish or just didn't care or at least that not coming was the wrong decision, but I just could't handle it. The funeral was on a Monday morning, and I was rocking my baby watching the Price is Right and just crying the whole time the funeral was going on. THat was two years ago and here I am again. This THING is in my life again.
I'm sorry for going on like that, but no one who hasn't delt with this could ever understand. And Valarie was born in1976 and lived to the age of 29 and I know medicine is so much better now. When she was a kid, she had a medicine called Pancrease, I guess that was enzymes, and my parents did clapping. (A manual alternative to the vest). She never used inhalers or Tobi until she was grown. I know it is much different for kids today with cf, but how hard is it? How good is the medicine?
 
M

maryann

New member
Thank all of ya'll for your stories. You all have beautiful children.
I also feel like it is harder for me than my husband. Before we got the results, we had decided what we needed to do and I told him not to let me change my mind if it came to that. But now, of course, I just can't stand the thought of NEVER having the option. I'm 26!! Who decides at 26 never to have more children. I know we are so blessed to have our daughter and that she's healthy. I feel like this is so unfair. I know I shouldn't complain when at least I know we're carrires and so many didn't know and now have children with cf. But I've been affected by this my whole life. My sister, Valarie, was 4 1/2 years older than me and was dx about the time I came along. So my whole life IT has been there. While I was pregnant Valarie was in the hospital and I couldn't go see her. I was afraid my baby might have it and just couldn't handle it. I lived 5 hours away, and of course that was a good excuse. And she was in quarintine part of the time. But the bottom line was I just couldn't handle it. Couldn't handle her being sick, her dying, and especially that my baby could have the same thing. I know that sounds incredibly selfish, but I just felt like it was all too much. She died 2 weeks after I had my baby, and we were still waiting on Madeline's(the baby) results at that time. When my mom called to say Valarie had died, the first thought I had was I couldn't go to the funeral. And I didn't. MY mom and aunt both called and said I should stay home and take care of the baby, so that was my "excuse". I had old friends showing up at the visitation and services to support me and I wasn't even there. I know they all had to think I was selfish or just didn't care or at least that not coming was the wrong decision, but I just could't handle it. The funeral was on a Monday morning, and I was rocking my baby watching the Price is Right and just crying the whole time the funeral was going on. THat was two years ago and here I am again. This THING is in my life again.
I'm sorry for going on like that, but no one who hasn't delt with this could ever understand. And Valarie was born in1976 and lived to the age of 29 and I know medicine is so much better now. When she was a kid, she had a medicine called Pancrease, I guess that was enzymes, and my parents did clapping. (A manual alternative to the vest). She never used inhalers or Tobi until she was grown. I know it is much different for kids today with cf, but how hard is it? How good is the medicine?
 
M

maryann

New member
Thank all of ya'll for your stories. You all have beautiful children.
I also feel like it is harder for me than my husband. Before we got the results, we had decided what we needed to do and I told him not to let me change my mind if it came to that. But now, of course, I just can't stand the thought of NEVER having the option. I'm 26!! Who decides at 26 never to have more children. I know we are so blessed to have our daughter and that she's healthy. I feel like this is so unfair. I know I shouldn't complain when at least I know we're carrires and so many didn't know and now have children with cf. But I've been affected by this my whole life. My sister, Valarie, was 4 1/2 years older than me and was dx about the time I came along. So my whole life IT has been there. While I was pregnant Valarie was in the hospital and I couldn't go see her. I was afraid my baby might have it and just couldn't handle it. I lived 5 hours away, and of course that was a good excuse. And she was in quarintine part of the time. But the bottom line was I just couldn't handle it. Couldn't handle her being sick, her dying, and especially that my baby could have the same thing. I know that sounds incredibly selfish, but I just felt like it was all too much. She died 2 weeks after I had my baby, and we were still waiting on Madeline's(the baby) results at that time. When my mom called to say Valarie had died, the first thought I had was I couldn't go to the funeral. And I didn't. MY mom and aunt both called and said I should stay home and take care of the baby, so that was my "excuse". I had old friends showing up at the visitation and services to support me and I wasn't even there. I know they all had to think I was selfish or just didn't care or at least that not coming was the wrong decision, but I just could't handle it. The funeral was on a Monday morning, and I was rocking my baby watching the Price is Right and just crying the whole time the funeral was going on. THat was two years ago and here I am again. This THING is in my life again.
I'm sorry for going on like that, but no one who hasn't delt with this could ever understand. And Valarie was born in1976 and lived to the age of 29 and I know medicine is so much better now. When she was a kid, she had a medicine called Pancrease, I guess that was enzymes, and my parents did clapping. (A manual alternative to the vest). She never used inhalers or Tobi until she was grown. I know it is much different for kids today with cf, but how hard is it? How good is the medicine?
 
M

mneville

Guest
Marianne- Have you considered IVF/PGD as an option for more children?
We only found out we were carriers after our firstborn son was diagnosed through newborn screening. We were devastated as we wanted more children.

We did lots of research and opted for IVF/PGD. We now have a healthy 4 month old son as a result. Our older son is now three and is doing awesome! CF medicine has come a long way and we expect our son to live a long, happy life.

It is a grueling decision but you may want to look at IVF route. Best of luck with whatever you decide.

Megan
 
M

mneville

Guest
Marianne- Have you considered IVF/PGD as an option for more children?
We only found out we were carriers after our firstborn son was diagnosed through newborn screening. We were devastated as we wanted more children.

We did lots of research and opted for IVF/PGD. We now have a healthy 4 month old son as a result. Our older son is now three and is doing awesome! CF medicine has come a long way and we expect our son to live a long, happy life.

It is a grueling decision but you may want to look at IVF route. Best of luck with whatever you decide.

Megan
 
M

mneville

Guest
Marianne- Have you considered IVF/PGD as an option for more children?
We only found out we were carriers after our firstborn son was diagnosed through newborn screening. We were devastated as we wanted more children.

We did lots of research and opted for IVF/PGD. We now have a healthy 4 month old son as a result. Our older son is now three and is doing awesome! CF medicine has come a long way and we expect our son to live a long, happy life.

It is a grueling decision but you may want to look at IVF route. Best of luck with whatever you decide.

Megan
 
M

mneville

Guest
Marianne- Have you considered IVF/PGD as an option for more children?
We only found out we were carriers after our firstborn son was diagnosed through newborn screening. We were devastated as we wanted more children.

We did lots of research and opted for IVF/PGD. We now have a healthy 4 month old son as a result. Our older son is now three and is doing awesome! CF medicine has come a long way and we expect our son to live a long, happy life.

It is a grueling decision but you may want to look at IVF route. Best of luck with whatever you decide.

Megan
 
M

mneville

Guest
Marianne- Have you considered IVF/PGD as an option for more children?
We only found out we were carriers after our firstborn son was diagnosed through newborn screening. We were devastated as we wanted more children.

We did lots of research and opted for IVF/PGD. We now have a healthy 4 month old son as a result. Our older son is now three and is doing awesome! CF medicine has come a long way and we expect our son to live a long, happy life.

It is a grueling decision but you may want to look at IVF route. Best of luck with whatever you decide.

Megan
 
L

lightNlife

New member
My husband and I have gone through a very similar decision-making process. I have CF, and we have decided that although we would love to be parents, it's just not something we have the capability to do with my health status being what it is.

He had a vasectomy back in April. We had been weighing the pros and cons of that decision even from before we were married. It was a tough one, no doubt about it. However, we have found peace in knowing that we won't ever have to deal with the stress of "what if I got pregnant."

Well-meaning people will probably say unhelpful things regarding your decision. We get most frustrated when people say things like "well, you never know, maybe God will give you an unexpected surprise" or "God works in mysterious ways." They don't understand that we've done what it takes to make the no kids thing a permanent part of who we are.

I think you're being very wise and reasonable. You have to do what makes sense for your family. Brad and I are very happy and content as a family of two. I hope that you will find people to encourage and support your decisions regarding your future.

If you'd like to see a little bit about us and how we handle CF together, please stop by CFvoice. com and watch the interview we're in, at this link:

<a target=_blank class=ftalternatingbarlinklarge href="http://www.cfvoice.com/info/caregivers/lifestyle/sickness_health.jsp">http://www.cfvoice.com/info/ca...le/sickness_health.jsp</a>
 
L

lightNlife

New member
My husband and I have gone through a very similar decision-making process. I have CF, and we have decided that although we would love to be parents, it's just not something we have the capability to do with my health status being what it is.

He had a vasectomy back in April. We had been weighing the pros and cons of that decision even from before we were married. It was a tough one, no doubt about it. However, we have found peace in knowing that we won't ever have to deal with the stress of "what if I got pregnant."

Well-meaning people will probably say unhelpful things regarding your decision. We get most frustrated when people say things like "well, you never know, maybe God will give you an unexpected surprise" or "God works in mysterious ways." They don't understand that we've done what it takes to make the no kids thing a permanent part of who we are.

I think you're being very wise and reasonable. You have to do what makes sense for your family. Brad and I are very happy and content as a family of two. I hope that you will find people to encourage and support your decisions regarding your future.

If you'd like to see a little bit about us and how we handle CF together, please stop by CFvoice. com and watch the interview we're in, at this link:

<a target=_blank class=ftalternatingbarlinklarge href="http://www.cfvoice.com/info/caregivers/lifestyle/sickness_health.jsp">http://www.cfvoice.com/info/ca...le/sickness_health.jsp</a>
 
L

lightNlife

New member
My husband and I have gone through a very similar decision-making process. I have CF, and we have decided that although we would love to be parents, it's just not something we have the capability to do with my health status being what it is.

He had a vasectomy back in April. We had been weighing the pros and cons of that decision even from before we were married. It was a tough one, no doubt about it. However, we have found peace in knowing that we won't ever have to deal with the stress of "what if I got pregnant."

Well-meaning people will probably say unhelpful things regarding your decision. We get most frustrated when people say things like "well, you never know, maybe God will give you an unexpected surprise" or "God works in mysterious ways." They don't understand that we've done what it takes to make the no kids thing a permanent part of who we are.

I think you're being very wise and reasonable. You have to do what makes sense for your family. Brad and I are very happy and content as a family of two. I hope that you will find people to encourage and support your decisions regarding your future.

If you'd like to see a little bit about us and how we handle CF together, please stop by CFvoice. com and watch the interview we're in, at this link:

<a target=_blank class=ftalternatingbarlinklarge href="http://www.cfvoice.com/info/caregivers/lifestyle/sickness_health.jsp">http://www.cfvoice.com/info/ca...le/sickness_health.jsp</a>
 
L

lightNlife

New member
My husband and I have gone through a very similar decision-making process. I have CF, and we have decided that although we would love to be parents, it's just not something we have the capability to do with my health status being what it is.

He had a vasectomy back in April. We had been weighing the pros and cons of that decision even from before we were married. It was a tough one, no doubt about it. However, we have found peace in knowing that we won't ever have to deal with the stress of "what if I got pregnant."

Well-meaning people will probably say unhelpful things regarding your decision. We get most frustrated when people say things like "well, you never know, maybe God will give you an unexpected surprise" or "God works in mysterious ways." They don't understand that we've done what it takes to make the no kids thing a permanent part of who we are.

I think you're being very wise and reasonable. You have to do what makes sense for your family. Brad and I are very happy and content as a family of two. I hope that you will find people to encourage and support your decisions regarding your future.

If you'd like to see a little bit about us and how we handle CF together, please stop by CFvoice. com and watch the interview we're in, at this link:

<a target=_blank class=ftalternatingbarlinklarge href="http://www.cfvoice.com/info/caregivers/lifestyle/sickness_health.jsp">http://www.cfvoice.com/info/ca...le/sickness_health.jsp</a>
 
L

lightNlife

New member
My husband and I have gone through a very similar decision-making process. I have CF, and we have decided that although we would love to be parents, it's just not something we have the capability to do with my health status being what it is.

He had a vasectomy back in April. We had been weighing the pros and cons of that decision even from before we were married. It was a tough one, no doubt about it. However, we have found peace in knowing that we won't ever have to deal with the stress of "what if I got pregnant."

Well-meaning people will probably say unhelpful things regarding your decision. We get most frustrated when people say things like "well, you never know, maybe God will give you an unexpected surprise" or "God works in mysterious ways." They don't understand that we've done what it takes to make the no kids thing a permanent part of who we are.

I think you're being very wise and reasonable. You have to do what makes sense for your family. Brad and I are very happy and content as a family of two. I hope that you will find people to encourage and support your decisions regarding your future.

If you'd like to see a little bit about us and how we handle CF together, please stop by CFvoice. com and watch the interview we're in, at this link:

<a target=_blank class=ftalternatingbarlinklarge href="http://www.cfvoice.com/info/caregivers/lifestyle/sickness_health.jsp">http://www.cfvoice.com/info/ca...le/sickness_health.jsp</a>
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Top