I had a really bad time back in June of 08 and was told I probably wouldn't make my daughter's wedding in Sept...well, I am still here with good and bad days. When I was given that "final journey" diagnosis...I organized my jewelry as to who gets what, updated my will, wrote my obit the way I wanted it, gathered up all my insurance (health & life) info in folder, banking info, credit card numbers for cancelling, deeds, and anything else that had my name on it and would need to be changed or informed. Then I wrote a paper out listing everything my family needed to know about our household stuff and my wishes about services (none, just an old fashioned Irish Party to celebrate my life not death). These things were all important but the most important thing I did was go out and buy blank journals for each one of my kids and grandchildren and I started to write in them. Things about me as a child, dating, marriage and some ups and downs all marriages go through, finding out about being pregnant with them and preparations for them to join the family, little stories about their childhood, both good and bad. For the grandkids I included stuff about their parents, heritage, and of course for all, a family tree and people's birthdays, anniverseries, etc. This just progressed into musings, songs I hear that remind me of them, a few good jokes, how proud I am of them for just handling life, and so on. I have kept up with these journals since and they now have 2 each and I'm working on their third...I also include pictures of some events I write about whether they are of them or from some other source. My daughter loves them and to my surprise my boys have read their first journals (they must be returned to me for safe keeping for now). Besides the organization of "stuff" (which I now keep current each month, never want to gather it all again!) the journals have been my greatest "Medicine" and mood alterer. The laughter and conversations with the kids when they bring up something out of their journals is the like a breath of fresh air to me.
Sorry this is so long but this might work for someone else who is in the "what do I do now" situation after receiving bad news. One last thought..it might also be the best medicine for yourself if you are writing one for your child with c/f...for you and their grandparents to have to remember and hear about this wonderful child.
