When to say "I am done"

crystalina0814 · Dec 22, 2009

For the CF mommy's here...how did you decide you were done. I have CF and have had two beautiful children naturally with no complications (4 and 1). My husband and I had that talk the other day about if we were done. He is hesitant, and I go back and forth. I would love another-have always dreamt of having a large family, but I think he worries about the "what if's" in life. I am currently still pretty healthy...FEV1 ranging from 78%-88%, depending on how I am feeling. I know my body can handle another pregnancy.

Do any of you other mom's struggle with this decision- I guess I should say "struggle" more because of your CF?

crystalina0814 · Dec 22, 2009

For the CF mommy's here...how did you decide you were done. I have CF and have had two beautiful children naturally with no complications (4 and 1). My husband and I had that talk the other day about if we were done. He is hesitant, and I go back and forth. I would love another-have always dreamt of having a large family, but I think he worries about the "what if's" in life. I am currently still pretty healthy...FEV1 ranging from 78%-88%, depending on how I am feeling. I know my body can handle another pregnancy.

Do any of you other mom's struggle with this decision- I guess I should say "struggle" more because of your CF?

crystalina0814 · Dec 22, 2009

For the CF mommy's here...how did you decide you were done. I have CF and have had two beautiful children naturally with no complications (4 and 1). My husband and I had that talk the other day about if we were done. He is hesitant, and I go back and forth. I would love another-have always dreamt of having a large family, but I think he worries about the "what if's" in life. I am currently still pretty healthy...FEV1 ranging from 78%-88%, depending on how I am feeling. I know my body can handle another pregnancy.

Do any of you other mom's struggle with this decision- I guess I should say "struggle" more because of your CF?

crystalina0814 · Dec 22, 2009

For the CF mommy's here...how did you decide you were done. I have CF and have had two beautiful children naturally with no complications (4 and 1). My husband and I had that talk the other day about if we were done. He is hesitant, and I go back and forth. I would love another-have always dreamt of having a large family, but I think he worries about the "what if's" in life. I am currently still pretty healthy...FEV1 ranging from 78%-88%, depending on how I am feeling. I know my body can handle another pregnancy.

Do any of you other mom's struggle with this decision- I guess I should say "struggle" more because of your CF?

crystalina0814 · Dec 22, 2009

For the CF mommy's here...how did you decide you were done. I have CF and have had two beautiful children naturally with no complications (4 and 1). My husband and I had that talk the other day about if we were done. He is hesitant, and I go back and forth. I would love another-have always dreamt of having a large family, but I think he worries about the "what if's" in life. I am currently still pretty healthy...FEV1 ranging from 78%-88%, depending on how I am feeling. I know my body can handle another pregnancy.
 
 Do any of you other mom's struggle with this decision- I guess I should say "struggle" more because of your CF?

mom2lillian · Dec 22, 2009

Yes, I do struggle with this. I have decided that since my husband will be bearing the burden financially when I am unable to work and in the event of my death caring for our child(ren) I should defer to his judgement. We have decided we want a second but if we can't this spring when we try then we will be done. I am about to be 30 and I feel we have to be realistic with the future and not just think about our wants because truth be told I desperately WANT MORE! But I am learning to be grateful and focus on what I have.

mom2lillian · Dec 22, 2009

Yes, I do struggle with this. I have decided that since my husband will be bearing the burden financially when I am unable to work and in the event of my death caring for our child(ren) I should defer to his judgement. We have decided we want a second but if we can't this spring when we try then we will be done. I am about to be 30 and I feel we have to be realistic with the future and not just think about our wants because truth be told I desperately WANT MORE! But I am learning to be grateful and focus on what I have.

mom2lillian · Dec 22, 2009

Yes, I do struggle with this. I have decided that since my husband will be bearing the burden financially when I am unable to work and in the event of my death caring for our child(ren) I should defer to his judgement. We have decided we want a second but if we can't this spring when we try then we will be done. I am about to be 30 and I feel we have to be realistic with the future and not just think about our wants because truth be told I desperately WANT MORE! But I am learning to be grateful and focus on what I have.

mom2lillian · Dec 22, 2009

Yes, I do struggle with this. I have decided that since my husband will be bearing the burden financially when I am unable to work and in the event of my death caring for our child(ren) I should defer to his judgement. We have decided we want a second but if we can't this spring when we try then we will be done. I am about to be 30 and I feel we have to be realistic with the future and not just think about our wants because truth be told I desperately WANT MORE! But I am learning to be grateful and focus on what I have.

mom2lillian · Dec 22, 2009

Yes, I do struggle with this. I have decided that since my husband will be bearing the burden financially when I am unable to work and in the event of my death caring for our child(ren) I should defer to his judgement. We have decided we want a second but if we can't this spring when we try then we will be done. I am about to be 30 and I feel we have to be realistic with the future and not just think about our wants because truth be told I desperately WANT MORE! But I am learning to be grateful and focus on what I have.

mamaScarlett · Dec 22, 2009

Yes I too struggle with this all the time. I went through a deep depression last year over this (and some health problems). The what ifs are very hard for me.
My husband and I decided to try for another and we're in the process.
Our daughter is now 2.5. I basically decided a while ago that I don't want to have any children past 30-unless they come out with major treatments for us. I'm 27 now so the clock is ticking.
I doubt I'll ever have more than 2. But I know my personality. After 2 I'd wish for more. I'm just a baby/child person, a born mother. But we just can't always have what we wish for. There's people without Cf that wish for more kids but just cant have them for one reason or another.

I'm very happy with 1 daughter, but if I couldn't have another it would be really hard for me to find a way to live with that.
There's so many other variables besides just Cf. Support-I live next door to family that is extremely supportive. I have a supportive husband financially and otherwise.
And my daughter too-she's got a rambunctious personality. She's a handful. So waiting a few years to have another was easy for me. If I had another one as challenging as she's been, stopping at 2 will be easy! <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-smile.gif" border="0">

BUt yes, you are not alone. For me the decision to have the 2nd was harder than the first.

If your kids are pretty good and motherhood has been easy on you physically and emotionally then I'd talk with your doc about going for another one.

For me though, I'd have a hard time leaving 3 or more kids with my husband, mother or mother in law while I am in the hospital. My family is amazing, loving and cares for her exactly the way I would. But I'd feel bad b/c thats alot to deal with. Plus just physically caring for that many would be too much for me at this point.

I ALWAYS keep an open mind to the future though-when it comes to new treatments, even adoption. And I try so hard to look everyday at what I do have.

mamaScarlett · Dec 22, 2009

Yes I too struggle with this all the time. I went through a deep depression last year over this (and some health problems). The what ifs are very hard for me.
My husband and I decided to try for another and we're in the process.
Our daughter is now 2.5. I basically decided a while ago that I don't want to have any children past 30-unless they come out with major treatments for us. I'm 27 now so the clock is ticking.
I doubt I'll ever have more than 2. But I know my personality. After 2 I'd wish for more. I'm just a baby/child person, a born mother. But we just can't always have what we wish for. There's people without Cf that wish for more kids but just cant have them for one reason or another.

I'm very happy with 1 daughter, but if I couldn't have another it would be really hard for me to find a way to live with that.
There's so many other variables besides just Cf. Support-I live next door to family that is extremely supportive. I have a supportive husband financially and otherwise.
And my daughter too-she's got a rambunctious personality. She's a handful. So waiting a few years to have another was easy for me. If I had another one as challenging as she's been, stopping at 2 will be easy! <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-smile.gif" border="0">

BUt yes, you are not alone. For me the decision to have the 2nd was harder than the first.

If your kids are pretty good and motherhood has been easy on you physically and emotionally then I'd talk with your doc about going for another one.

For me though, I'd have a hard time leaving 3 or more kids with my husband, mother or mother in law while I am in the hospital. My family is amazing, loving and cares for her exactly the way I would. But I'd feel bad b/c thats alot to deal with. Plus just physically caring for that many would be too much for me at this point.

I ALWAYS keep an open mind to the future though-when it comes to new treatments, even adoption. And I try so hard to look everyday at what I do have.

mamaScarlett · Dec 22, 2009

Yes I too struggle with this all the time. I went through a deep depression last year over this (and some health problems). The what ifs are very hard for me.
My husband and I decided to try for another and we're in the process.
Our daughter is now 2.5. I basically decided a while ago that I don't want to have any children past 30-unless they come out with major treatments for us. I'm 27 now so the clock is ticking.
I doubt I'll ever have more than 2. But I know my personality. After 2 I'd wish for more. I'm just a baby/child person, a born mother. But we just can't always have what we wish for. There's people without Cf that wish for more kids but just cant have them for one reason or another.

I'm very happy with 1 daughter, but if I couldn't have another it would be really hard for me to find a way to live with that.
There's so many other variables besides just Cf. Support-I live next door to family that is extremely supportive. I have a supportive husband financially and otherwise.
And my daughter too-she's got a rambunctious personality. She's a handful. So waiting a few years to have another was easy for me. If I had another one as challenging as she's been, stopping at 2 will be easy! <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-smile.gif" border="0">

BUt yes, you are not alone. For me the decision to have the 2nd was harder than the first.

If your kids are pretty good and motherhood has been easy on you physically and emotionally then I'd talk with your doc about going for another one.

For me though, I'd have a hard time leaving 3 or more kids with my husband, mother or mother in law while I am in the hospital. My family is amazing, loving and cares for her exactly the way I would. But I'd feel bad b/c thats alot to deal with. Plus just physically caring for that many would be too much for me at this point.

I ALWAYS keep an open mind to the future though-when it comes to new treatments, even adoption. And I try so hard to look everyday at what I do have.

mamaScarlett · Dec 22, 2009

Yes I too struggle with this all the time. I went through a deep depression last year over this (and some health problems). The what ifs are very hard for me.
My husband and I decided to try for another and we're in the process.
Our daughter is now 2.5. I basically decided a while ago that I don't want to have any children past 30-unless they come out with major treatments for us. I'm 27 now so the clock is ticking.
I doubt I'll ever have more than 2. But I know my personality. After 2 I'd wish for more. I'm just a baby/child person, a born mother. But we just can't always have what we wish for. There's people without Cf that wish for more kids but just cant have them for one reason or another.

I'm very happy with 1 daughter, but if I couldn't have another it would be really hard for me to find a way to live with that.
There's so many other variables besides just Cf. Support-I live next door to family that is extremely supportive. I have a supportive husband financially and otherwise.
And my daughter too-she's got a rambunctious personality. She's a handful. So waiting a few years to have another was easy for me. If I had another one as challenging as she's been, stopping at 2 will be easy! <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-smile.gif" border="0">

BUt yes, you are not alone. For me the decision to have the 2nd was harder than the first.

If your kids are pretty good and motherhood has been easy on you physically and emotionally then I'd talk with your doc about going for another one.

For me though, I'd have a hard time leaving 3 or more kids with my husband, mother or mother in law while I am in the hospital. My family is amazing, loving and cares for her exactly the way I would. But I'd feel bad b/c thats alot to deal with. Plus just physically caring for that many would be too much for me at this point.

I ALWAYS keep an open mind to the future though-when it comes to new treatments, even adoption. And I try so hard to look everyday at what I do have.

mamaScarlett · Dec 22, 2009

Yes I too struggle with this all the time. I went through a deep depression last year over this (and some health problems). The what ifs are very hard for me.
 My husband and I decided to try for another and we're in the process.
 Our daughter is now 2.5. I basically decided a while ago that I don't want to have any children past 30-unless they come out with major treatments for us. I'm 27 now so the clock is ticking.
 I doubt I'll ever have more than 2. But I know my personality. After 2 I'd wish for more. I'm just a baby/child person, a born mother. But we just can't always have what we wish for. There's people without Cf that wish for more kids but just cant have them for one reason or another.
 
 I'm very happy with 1 daughter, but if I couldn't have another it would be really hard for me to find a way to live with that.
 There's so many other variables besides just Cf. Support-I live next door to family that is extremely supportive. I have a supportive husband financially and otherwise.
 And my daughter too-she's got a rambunctious personality. She's a handful. So waiting a few years to have another was easy for me. If I had another one as challenging as she's been, stopping at 2 will be easy! <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-smile.gif" border="0">
 
 BUt yes, you are not alone. For me the decision to have the 2nd was harder than the first.
 
 If your kids are pretty good and motherhood has been easy on you physically and emotionally then I'd talk with your doc about going for another one.
 
 For me though, I'd have a hard time leaving 3 or more kids with my husband, mother or mother in law while I am in the hospital. My family is amazing, loving and cares for her exactly the way I would. But I'd feel bad b/c thats alot to deal with. Plus just physically caring for that many would be too much for me at this point.
 
 I ALWAYS keep an open mind to the future though-when it comes to new treatments, even adoption. And I try so hard to look everyday at what I do have.

jennylivingston · Dec 22, 2009

My husband and I have talked about this IN DETAIL over the past few weeks. I went into my pregnancy with a FEV1 of 94%. I had an "easy" pregnancy and the delivery went great! But three months after I had my daughter I was down to 27%. A combination of my body being worn out from the pregnancy, the lack of sleep, and it being such a terrible cold and flu season landed me in the intermediate intensive care unit for a week--two weeks total in the hospital. After two months I'm back up to 67%, but I don't know if I'll ever be back up into the 90's like I was.

I don't blame this on my pregnancy alone. There were a lot of factors that led to such a huge downfall. I may just be really paranoid, but I don't think I could ever go into another pregnancy as healthy as I was the last time. It makes us worry what would happen if I were to get pregnant a second time and any of those factors lined up again... It's a scary thought.

I NEED to be here for my little girl. It kills me that we may not be able to give her any siblings, but we have to do what's in the best interest of ALL of us.

We have decided, at least for now, that we won't be trying for more. We'll see how things play out over the next few years. I'm still holding out hope that I'll get back up to that 90%. I'm hoping for a cure. I'm hoping that someday I won't have to be worried about getting pregnant. But for now, I will cherish each moment I have with my little one and thank God that I'm fortunate enough to have her!

jennylivingston · Dec 22, 2009

My husband and I have talked about this IN DETAIL over the past few weeks. I went into my pregnancy with a FEV1 of 94%. I had an "easy" pregnancy and the delivery went great! But three months after I had my daughter I was down to 27%. A combination of my body being worn out from the pregnancy, the lack of sleep, and it being such a terrible cold and flu season landed me in the intermediate intensive care unit for a week--two weeks total in the hospital. After two months I'm back up to 67%, but I don't know if I'll ever be back up into the 90's like I was.

I don't blame this on my pregnancy alone. There were a lot of factors that led to such a huge downfall. I may just be really paranoid, but I don't think I could ever go into another pregnancy as healthy as I was the last time. It makes us worry what would happen if I were to get pregnant a second time and any of those factors lined up again... It's a scary thought.

I NEED to be here for my little girl. It kills me that we may not be able to give her any siblings, but we have to do what's in the best interest of ALL of us.

We have decided, at least for now, that we won't be trying for more. We'll see how things play out over the next few years. I'm still holding out hope that I'll get back up to that 90%. I'm hoping for a cure. I'm hoping that someday I won't have to be worried about getting pregnant. But for now, I will cherish each moment I have with my little one and thank God that I'm fortunate enough to have her!

jennylivingston · Dec 22, 2009

My husband and I have talked about this IN DETAIL over the past few weeks. I went into my pregnancy with a FEV1 of 94%. I had an "easy" pregnancy and the delivery went great! But three months after I had my daughter I was down to 27%. A combination of my body being worn out from the pregnancy, the lack of sleep, and it being such a terrible cold and flu season landed me in the intermediate intensive care unit for a week--two weeks total in the hospital. After two months I'm back up to 67%, but I don't know if I'll ever be back up into the 90's like I was.

I don't blame this on my pregnancy alone. There were a lot of factors that led to such a huge downfall. I may just be really paranoid, but I don't think I could ever go into another pregnancy as healthy as I was the last time. It makes us worry what would happen if I were to get pregnant a second time and any of those factors lined up again... It's a scary thought.

I NEED to be here for my little girl. It kills me that we may not be able to give her any siblings, but we have to do what's in the best interest of ALL of us.

We have decided, at least for now, that we won't be trying for more. We'll see how things play out over the next few years. I'm still holding out hope that I'll get back up to that 90%. I'm hoping for a cure. I'm hoping that someday I won't have to be worried about getting pregnant. But for now, I will cherish each moment I have with my little one and thank God that I'm fortunate enough to have her!

jennylivingston · Dec 22, 2009

My husband and I have talked about this IN DETAIL over the past few weeks. I went into my pregnancy with a FEV1 of 94%. I had an "easy" pregnancy and the delivery went great! But three months after I had my daughter I was down to 27%. A combination of my body being worn out from the pregnancy, the lack of sleep, and it being such a terrible cold and flu season landed me in the intermediate intensive care unit for a week--two weeks total in the hospital. After two months I'm back up to 67%, but I don't know if I'll ever be back up into the 90's like I was.

I don't blame this on my pregnancy alone. There were a lot of factors that led to such a huge downfall. I may just be really paranoid, but I don't think I could ever go into another pregnancy as healthy as I was the last time. It makes us worry what would happen if I were to get pregnant a second time and any of those factors lined up again... It's a scary thought.

I NEED to be here for my little girl. It kills me that we may not be able to give her any siblings, but we have to do what's in the best interest of ALL of us.

We have decided, at least for now, that we won't be trying for more. We'll see how things play out over the next few years. I'm still holding out hope that I'll get back up to that 90%. I'm hoping for a cure. I'm hoping that someday I won't have to be worried about getting pregnant. But for now, I will cherish each moment I have with my little one and thank God that I'm fortunate enough to have her!

jennylivingston · Dec 22, 2009

My husband and I have talked about this IN DETAIL over the past few weeks. I went into my pregnancy with a FEV1 of 94%. I had an "easy" pregnancy and the delivery went great! But three months after I had my daughter I was down to 27%. A combination of my body being worn out from the pregnancy, the lack of sleep, and it being such a terrible cold and flu season landed me in the intermediate intensive care unit for a week--two weeks total in the hospital. After two months I'm back up to 67%, but I don't know if I'll ever be back up into the 90's like I was.
 
 I don't blame this on my pregnancy alone. There were a lot of factors that led to such a huge downfall. I may just be really paranoid, but I don't think I could ever go into another pregnancy as healthy as I was the last time. It makes us worry what would happen if I were to get pregnant a second time and any of those factors lined up again... It's a scary thought.
 
 I NEED to be here for my little girl. It kills me that we may not be able to give her any siblings, but we have to do what's in the best interest of ALL of us.
 
 We have decided, at least for now, that we won't be trying for more. We'll see how things play out over the next few years. I'm still holding out hope that I'll get back up to that 90%. I'm hoping for a cure. I'm hoping that someday I won't have to be worried about getting pregnant. But for now, I will cherish each moment I have with my little one and thank God that I'm fortunate enough to have her!

When to say "I am done"

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