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Why have the child?
- Thread starter anonymous
- Start date
Wow to the last person who posted: Do you have CF and are really bitter about it or are you an outsider who feels that people with CF are a waste of a life? I was shocked and extremely sadened by your response. Anyway I am 20 with CF and have never ever felt that my life was depressing. And you say a life with CF is hard....well Duh...LIFE itself is hard!!! CF or no CF life is not easy and I don't think its meant to be. I am 20 and loving life, CF and all. I would be so heartbrocken if someone told my mother to abort me because of my CF...I would have missed out on all of the wonderful things in my life! To the original poster: We are all people here who just so happen to have CF and I think all of us have had our ups and downs, but I think most of us really do like our lives. Some of the posers may seem to be down like the last poster, but think about how many people without CF are depressed and don't like their lives. Look at how many people lead healthy lives and are miserable. Another thing is there no such thing as a perfect baby. I just saw an ad for Saint Judes hospital last night and it showed children all under the age of 8 with cancer. NOBODY expects their baby to have cancer, but it does happen. MS strikes people in the prime of their life and is a detrimental disease, eating disorders are very deadly and don't usually occure till the teens, bi polar is a horrible mental disease, but nobody can look at a fetus and say, hey I think your fetus may have bi polar....I know this is depressing, but all I am saying is life is NOT perfect and neither are the people who live life. The important thing is to live life to its fullest or in your case let your child (if you decide to give it life) live life to the fullest by loving and caring and giving him/her everything you would give any other child. I hope you will post back since I think the CF community has been very caring in giving you MANY responses to your question.
I am 25 years old living with CF and doing great. How can you give up on something that you don't know the outcome of? Your child could be born and do very well in life or they could have to work a little harder on staying healthy. Either way a blessing will come out of it. God is giving you this for a reason. That child has a purpose in life. Sick or healthy! Alaina
I agree with the last post, every unborn child was created for a reason. It may not be noticable at first, but eventually you will learn the purpose of their life, or the difference they will make in the world. I have CF and if I have a baby with CF I will just pray it stays as healthy as it can for as long as possible. I would not terminate my pregnancy.I love my life with CF and all. I'm sure any unborn baby would rather live any kind of life than no life at all.
There is a one in four chance of two CF carriers to have a baby with CF. If you decide to terminate your pregnancy and try to have another baby it might end up with Cf too. My mom only had me and my sister and we both have CF.Hopefully you can take on the challenges and difficulties of dealing with hard times and all the doctor appointments, because it will probably be worth it!
I am a 27 year old australian living in london and have had cycstic fibrosis since i was 18mths old. I know that it must be scaring having the thought that your child my die one day but i am proof that just because you have cf this does not mean you are limited in life or your life will be less. Since your wives sister died i am sure you are aware that they have made so much progress with medicines etc nowadays.I hope this helps you feel a little less worried and makes your realise that just becuase your child will have cf doesnt mean they will not be able to enjoy life to its full!!All the best....
Having a chronically ill child comes down to a few things:1. Are you financially able to afford that child, ie. do you have good health insurance, If you have an HMO, can you successfully cover the 80/202. If the country you live in preaches pro life, does that country take the responsibility for that stance and guarrantee coverage for pre-existing patients even after 18? 3. Does the country you live in have insurance companies that will cover pre-existing conditions and is that coverage affordable (I pay $602 a month - Hardly affordable in the US considering the economy - but my country gives me know choice except to embrace capitalism or die - I have not embraced capitalism, but I'm not financially stupid and choose to survive in the country I was born)?3. Does your country have socialized health care?4. If you choose not to take responsibility for your chronically ill child, do you know a couple that can take care of your child?5. While I am pro-choice, I would hope that there is more to a decision to have an abortion than just financial woes - There are families that want and can afford chronically ill children.6. Chroncally ill children have been extremely beneficial to this world, because chronically ill children create scientific interests. Those scientific interests can and often do lead to treatments and cures which not only benefit those with chronic illnesses, but also those individuals in the future who are currently healthy.7. In the end, one must do what they think is right. Life is never easy and for every choice, there is a good and bad.Sean 26m w/CF
Howdy 21/m/wcf Not all people with cf really end up bad off, yes alot do but if you get the right doctors and give alot of care they can live an almost perfect life. Me I got lucky and in my opion got the best doctors around, my lung functions are 99% and I rarely have to go to the hospital because of my lungs. The point is cf or no cf this child could end up being one of the best things to ever happen to you.
Why? The question should really be why not? My fiance has CF and he lives a very normal life. He has channged my life. He is a very talented, caring, intelligent person. Who could your child become in life? He or she could win a Noble Peace Prize, could find a cure for cancer, become the first female persident. There are millions of wonderful accomplishments that this child could achieve. Are you willing to sacrifice a life just because of a hardship. At least you know the odds stacked againt this baby before day one. CF patients can live wonderful lives, they also touch many of us that don't have CF. If my fiance's mother would have aborted him my life would be completely different. I thank God every day that I have gotten the chance to be part of his life no matter what. I know that this isn't the easiest road that we have to face but no one is ever guaranteed tomorrow. We love each other no matter what, I could be in an accident tommorrow and never come back home to him. Everyone deserves love. Even this child that isn't so perfect. So what if the expense is a little higher than normal, so what if you have to spend more time with this child doing therapy, so what if you love and lose this child before you think you should. There are people that would give anything to just have a child and you are taking your special child for granted. I hope that you make a decision that you can be comfortable with for the rest of your life, whichever choice you make it will be permanent. Good Luck to you and your family.
Hi,My name is Juliet and I have three sons. Tyler, 11, Jon,7 and Sam 4. Sam has CF. He was diagnosed at birth with meconium ileus, and intestinal blockage. He was in the hospital 8 days. He is doing well now, has not been hospitalized since. I was more scared to get Tyler and Jonny tested for CF because I knew Samuel was really sick at birth. I expected something to be wrong with him. But when I had to have the other two tested, I thought I would just die. That was the hardest 12 weeks of my life...waiting to see Sam's results and then waiting for the other two's results. I have DF508, my husband has the wierd, unknown mutation. Samuel's phenotype is milder lung disease, but he has pancreatic insufficiency and has done phenomenomally well the last couple of years (knock on wood!!!!!) I guess my point is thathere i had what I thought were two healthy sons and within a few days of my Samuel's birth, learned that all three of my sons may have a disease that would kill them before my very eyes. You can give birth to what you think may be a perfectly healthy child that may come down with leukemia, a brain tumor, or get hit by a car. Of course, this disease ruins what should be the happiest time of your lives.Everyone expects to have a healthy child, one that will outlive you. I'm so sorry that you are going thru this...I can't say what I would have done in your shoes. Samuel is the light of my life, and also my anguish. I know that if I got pregnant again I would struggle with this issue. I can tell you this...I can'timagine my life without Samuel, or my other two children for that matter. He has opened up my eyes to things I never knew before. He is so tiny, but bright, beautiful and thoughtful. His soul is giving and loving. He is a brown belt in karate, playing the violin and homeschooling. I am not a religious freak, but rather agnostic. I don't have a religious buffer to fall back upon. All I know is that when your CF child is healthy, it is wonderful, when they get sick, you have to do more work and worry more. Samuel is worth it, but it takes an emotional toll. Whatever you do, don't feel guilty for your decision. It's not fair for a parent to ever have to be presented with this kind of situation. I wish you the best,Juliet and the three muskateers
I have CF...and honestly that just hurt badly. Our life is bad enough and then to think our parents wouldnt want us! That kills me. no one has ever made me cry with things they say about CF but that definately did. No matter what that child has She/He is still a child and you should love her/him with all your heart and want her/him with every inch of your soul with or without CF. I'm sorry sir but if thats how you feel then you are not a nice person and dont deserve a baby so special as the one your having.