My Dying Brother
So... I just wanted to let you know a couple of things about me, my brother and our lives so that you can understand this multi-genre project more easily. First off, my brother has cystic fibrosis (you probably can't pronounce it, so I'll just refer to it as C.F from now on) C. F is a genetic disease that affects the heart, lungs and stomach. The form of the disease that my brother has will kill him when he is about 20 years old. The links are me talking to God, and the ending is God answering me back. So this multi genre project is about my memories with him, my feeling towards him and how I will cherish him forever, because death and dieing affects everyone, we all just need to learn how to accept it and pursue our lives in spite of it. For me, this project has become a huge step toward achieving that.
The Song of Silliness
He laughed, and we sang it once again. Again! The silliness. The immaturity. The fun. The laughter. The teasing. The games. The times. It's all about the times we'll share together.
Little Brother
Ah, we're so close,
Best friends,
I would do anything for him,
Kill for him,
Die for him,
We have so much fun together,
Spend so much time together,
I love him,
He's my little brother,
And even with all that love,
Even with how much I would give to protect him,
I can't save him from death's cold grip,
So cold,
So icy,
I will lose him soon,
And there's nothing I can do,
Just live with him, laugh with him,
And cherish memories,
My brother
God,
I know I've talked to you hundreds of times about this, but my brother needs you. He shows so much strength at times, I feel like he could make it longer than the doctors say he will. Then other times I see how fragile he is, how much he needs you.
The Patient
Then the resting patient, the brother, sleeps softly, repeatedly gasping like one who is drowning, pretending now to be asleep, now normal, while knowing that soon he'll die. He awakens and smiles through the pain, and hides it so well; his little body aches and is beginning to fail him. Then suddenly we laugh, having so much fun, bringing to us as much joy as when we were little. It hurts so much to watch my brother dying, there is almost no hope, and the tears of pain cannot be held back. While he sleeps, I know we don't have much longer.
Recipe for my Pain
1 little brother
4 cups of funny
3 cups of cool
2 cups of easy to talk to
2 cups of best friend
1 cup of caring
1 teaspoon of annoying
1 microscopic genetic disease
Mix together funny, cool, easy to talk to and caring, blend well. Then mix in annoying and best friend, pour mixture into little brother, and then add genetic disease. Wait until disease takes over and kills little brother. Enjoy the pain.
Lord, he needs your healing, your help, and your love. God I beg you, let him live. I need him Lord. Please send him your healing. He loves you so much; he needs you with him now. I don't know if I can go on without him. Only you have the power Lord, only you have the power to save him.
The Hospital
The hospital, so cold, a cool rush of air makes its way through the hospital and up my body, simultaneously causing a chill that slowly creeps its way to my extremities. The smell, everything so clean, it's mixed with the scent of nasty cafeteria food. It's a scent so hard to describe, and yet so distinct. Surrounded by happy hospital staff, they see death and dying every day, but they know they need to give a sense of hope, so they just smile ever so pleasantly, so willing and ready to help.
I make my way to the elevator, so slowly. I want so much to see my brother, but I'm scared to see him in pain. I enter the elevator and push the button for the 9th floor, and an anxious feeling arises. One would think that after fifteen years of doing this it would become easier, but it's not. I make it to floor nine, and slowly step out of the elevator, I want to back up into the elevator, but I can't, I need to see him, so I press on.
I make my way into his room and see him; he's sleeping. He is so tired; it's hard to look at him. There are tubes sticking out of his arms and practically everywhere else on his body. It's hard seeing him like this, and yet I sit down next to him and stare for hours on end. I stay there until the nurse tells me that it's time for me to leave. So I give him one last glance as I leave, saddened by the sight, knowing full well that I'll return to do it again tomorrow.
Joey,
I hear your prayers every night, and I am saddened by them, but trust me I have a plan for you and your brother. I know it's hard, but you need to let go of him and the pain that will be brought by his death, his death that is coming so soon. You will see him again one day, in my kingdom. Just let go and trust in me, have faith in me.
So... I just wanted to let you know a couple of things about me, my brother and our lives so that you can understand this multi-genre project more easily. First off, my brother has cystic fibrosis (you probably can't pronounce it, so I'll just refer to it as C.F from now on) C. F is a genetic disease that affects the heart, lungs and stomach. The form of the disease that my brother has will kill him when he is about 20 years old. The links are me talking to God, and the ending is God answering me back. So this multi genre project is about my memories with him, my feeling towards him and how I will cherish him forever, because death and dieing affects everyone, we all just need to learn how to accept it and pursue our lives in spite of it. For me, this project has become a huge step toward achieving that.
The Song of Silliness
He laughed, and we sang it once again. Again! The silliness. The immaturity. The fun. The laughter. The teasing. The games. The times. It's all about the times we'll share together.
Little Brother
Ah, we're so close,
Best friends,
I would do anything for him,
Kill for him,
Die for him,
We have so much fun together,
Spend so much time together,
I love him,
He's my little brother,
And even with all that love,
Even with how much I would give to protect him,
I can't save him from death's cold grip,
So cold,
So icy,
I will lose him soon,
And there's nothing I can do,
Just live with him, laugh with him,
And cherish memories,
My brother
God,
I know I've talked to you hundreds of times about this, but my brother needs you. He shows so much strength at times, I feel like he could make it longer than the doctors say he will. Then other times I see how fragile he is, how much he needs you.
The Patient
Then the resting patient, the brother, sleeps softly, repeatedly gasping like one who is drowning, pretending now to be asleep, now normal, while knowing that soon he'll die. He awakens and smiles through the pain, and hides it so well; his little body aches and is beginning to fail him. Then suddenly we laugh, having so much fun, bringing to us as much joy as when we were little. It hurts so much to watch my brother dying, there is almost no hope, and the tears of pain cannot be held back. While he sleeps, I know we don't have much longer.
Recipe for my Pain
1 little brother
4 cups of funny
3 cups of cool
2 cups of easy to talk to
2 cups of best friend
1 cup of caring
1 teaspoon of annoying
1 microscopic genetic disease
Mix together funny, cool, easy to talk to and caring, blend well. Then mix in annoying and best friend, pour mixture into little brother, and then add genetic disease. Wait until disease takes over and kills little brother. Enjoy the pain.
Lord, he needs your healing, your help, and your love. God I beg you, let him live. I need him Lord. Please send him your healing. He loves you so much; he needs you with him now. I don't know if I can go on without him. Only you have the power Lord, only you have the power to save him.
The Hospital
The hospital, so cold, a cool rush of air makes its way through the hospital and up my body, simultaneously causing a chill that slowly creeps its way to my extremities. The smell, everything so clean, it's mixed with the scent of nasty cafeteria food. It's a scent so hard to describe, and yet so distinct. Surrounded by happy hospital staff, they see death and dying every day, but they know they need to give a sense of hope, so they just smile ever so pleasantly, so willing and ready to help.
I make my way to the elevator, so slowly. I want so much to see my brother, but I'm scared to see him in pain. I enter the elevator and push the button for the 9th floor, and an anxious feeling arises. One would think that after fifteen years of doing this it would become easier, but it's not. I make it to floor nine, and slowly step out of the elevator, I want to back up into the elevator, but I can't, I need to see him, so I press on.
I make my way into his room and see him; he's sleeping. He is so tired; it's hard to look at him. There are tubes sticking out of his arms and practically everywhere else on his body. It's hard seeing him like this, and yet I sit down next to him and stare for hours on end. I stay there until the nurse tells me that it's time for me to leave. So I give him one last glance as I leave, saddened by the sight, knowing full well that I'll return to do it again tomorrow.
Joey,
I hear your prayers every night, and I am saddened by them, but trust me I have a plan for you and your brother. I know it's hard, but you need to let go of him and the pain that will be brought by his death, his death that is coming so soon. You will see him again one day, in my kingdom. Just let go and trust in me, have faith in me.