Adoption Advice Needed

4blueeyes

New member
My husband and I both 34, live in middle Tennessee and we are interested in finding out what has worked for CF couples. We tried about 5 years ago to adopt through China and were heartbroken to hear it was a no go. My husband is a VERY healthy adult with CF. We have been very successful in love and life. Most people do not know my husband has CF. The adoption rejection felt like discrimination and left us very saddened. We want a family and are tired of being asked "When will you have kids?" It breaks our hearts every time someone says "You will be great parents." Will you please share your story with us? The good and the bad, we need to find a place to focus our energy. Thank you.
 

4blueeyes

New member
My husband and I both 34, live in middle Tennessee and we are interested in finding out what has worked for CF couples. We tried about 5 years ago to adopt through China and were heartbroken to hear it was a no go. My husband is a VERY healthy adult with CF. We have been very successful in love and life. Most people do not know my husband has CF. The adoption rejection felt like discrimination and left us very saddened. We want a family and are tired of being asked "When will you have kids?" It breaks our hearts every time someone says "You will be great parents." Will you please share your story with us? The good and the bad, we need to find a place to focus our energy. Thank you.
 

4blueeyes

New member
My husband and I both 34, live in middle Tennessee and we are interested in finding out what has worked for CF couples. We tried about 5 years ago to adopt through China and were heartbroken to hear it was a no go. My husband is a VERY healthy adult with CF. We have been very successful in love and life. Most people do not know my husband has CF. The adoption rejection felt like discrimination and left us very saddened. We want a family and are tired of being asked "When will you have kids?" It breaks our hearts every time someone says "You will be great parents." Will you please share your story with us? The good and the bad, we need to find a place to focus our energy. Thank you.
 

beansmom

New member
I do not have CF, but I do know about adoption. My kids are both adopted. I know that adopting privately, domestically there are less limitations on health...you just have to be able to show that if something did happen to one of you the child would be supported.

Also in many areas you can adopt through foster care as long as one of you is in good health.
 

beansmom

New member
I do not have CF, but I do know about adoption. My kids are both adopted. I know that adopting privately, domestically there are less limitations on health...you just have to be able to show that if something did happen to one of you the child would be supported.

Also in many areas you can adopt through foster care as long as one of you is in good health.
 

beansmom

New member
I do not have CF, but I do know about adoption. My kids are both adopted. I know that adopting privately, domestically there are less limitations on health...you just have to be able to show that if something did happen to one of you the child would be supported.
<br />
<br />Also in many areas you can adopt through foster care as long as one of you is in good health.
 

Jeana

New member
My husband and I adopted our son Christopher almost six years ago now! It was a domestic adoption. We started in about August through an adoption agency to get our home study and paperwork done. We said that I had CF, of course, but did make a big deal about it. We explained that I was hospitalized about once a year for a tuneup, but basically did not draw a ton of attention to my CF. I was (and still am) working full time and had at that point saved up almost a month of sick/personal leave days, so was able to show that it was not creating a huge impact in my life.

When that part was done, we began looking for older children--babies were about $7500 more--on the internet (about October-November). Then, on Thanksgiving Day, my husband called his half-brother's mother to wish her a happy Thanksgiving and she told us that she knew someone who wanted someone to adopt her baby. We were going to adopt an older child, but God had a different plan. In March, we were given our two-day-old baby. We did have some concern that the birth parents could change their minds, but roughly six months later, the paperwork was finalized. Nothing is impossible for the Lord! What a blessing Chris is in our lives.
 

Jeana

New member
My husband and I adopted our son Christopher almost six years ago now! It was a domestic adoption. We started in about August through an adoption agency to get our home study and paperwork done. We said that I had CF, of course, but did make a big deal about it. We explained that I was hospitalized about once a year for a tuneup, but basically did not draw a ton of attention to my CF. I was (and still am) working full time and had at that point saved up almost a month of sick/personal leave days, so was able to show that it was not creating a huge impact in my life.

When that part was done, we began looking for older children--babies were about $7500 more--on the internet (about October-November). Then, on Thanksgiving Day, my husband called his half-brother's mother to wish her a happy Thanksgiving and she told us that she knew someone who wanted someone to adopt her baby. We were going to adopt an older child, but God had a different plan. In March, we were given our two-day-old baby. We did have some concern that the birth parents could change their minds, but roughly six months later, the paperwork was finalized. Nothing is impossible for the Lord! What a blessing Chris is in our lives.
 

Jeana

New member
My husband and I adopted our son Christopher almost six years ago now! It was a domestic adoption. We started in about August through an adoption agency to get our home study and paperwork done. We said that I had CF, of course, but did make a big deal about it. We explained that I was hospitalized about once a year for a tuneup, but basically did not draw a ton of attention to my CF. I was (and still am) working full time and had at that point saved up almost a month of sick/personal leave days, so was able to show that it was not creating a huge impact in my life.
<br />
<br />When that part was done, we began looking for older children--babies were about $7500 more--on the internet (about October-November). Then, on Thanksgiving Day, my husband called his half-brother's mother to wish her a happy Thanksgiving and she told us that she knew someone who wanted someone to adopt her baby. We were going to adopt an older child, but God had a different plan. In March, we were given our two-day-old baby. We did have some concern that the birth parents could change their minds, but roughly six months later, the paperwork was finalized. Nothing is impossible for the Lord! What a blessing Chris is in our lives.
 

FitForCF

New member
I know exactly what you're going through. My wife and I had been married for over eight years and some of our friends were having their second baby. We got the same comment you talked about. Finally we decided to look into adoption. We tried a private adoption, but at the last minute the women changed her mind. We were very upset. A friend suggested an agency called Bethany Christian Services. We ended up going with them. However during the home study and paper work it came up about my CF. I had to get a written letter from my doctor stating I was healthy enough for children. We were not picky as to what child we got, so when we sat down with the agency they explained there are 4 categories, white, black, biracial and special needs. The white and black babies there a waiting list, but for biracial and special needs there was no waiting. We didn't think special needs would be right for us, since I already had cf, so we went with the biracial babies. In less than 3 months we had a baby in our home. He is now 10 years old.
We have adopted 3 children from Bethany and each time it was a breeze. They are a nonprofit so they don't charge as much as some agencies.
Also, you can look into the local DSS. It is virtually free to adopted, but the wait maybe longer.
Ok, that's my story, good luck
 

FitForCF

New member
I know exactly what you're going through. My wife and I had been married for over eight years and some of our friends were having their second baby. We got the same comment you talked about. Finally we decided to look into adoption. We tried a private adoption, but at the last minute the women changed her mind. We were very upset. A friend suggested an agency called Bethany Christian Services. We ended up going with them. However during the home study and paper work it came up about my CF. I had to get a written letter from my doctor stating I was healthy enough for children. We were not picky as to what child we got, so when we sat down with the agency they explained there are 4 categories, white, black, biracial and special needs. The white and black babies there a waiting list, but for biracial and special needs there was no waiting. We didn't think special needs would be right for us, since I already had cf, so we went with the biracial babies. In less than 3 months we had a baby in our home. He is now 10 years old.
We have adopted 3 children from Bethany and each time it was a breeze. They are a nonprofit so they don't charge as much as some agencies.
Also, you can look into the local DSS. It is virtually free to adopted, but the wait maybe longer.
Ok, that's my story, good luck
 

FitForCF

New member
I know exactly what you're going through. My wife and I had been married for over eight years and some of our friends were having their second baby. We got the same comment you talked about. Finally we decided to look into adoption. We tried a private adoption, but at the last minute the women changed her mind. We were very upset. A friend suggested an agency called Bethany Christian Services. We ended up going with them. However during the home study and paper work it came up about my CF. I had to get a written letter from my doctor stating I was healthy enough for children. We were not picky as to what child we got, so when we sat down with the agency they explained there are 4 categories, white, black, biracial and special needs. The white and black babies there a waiting list, but for biracial and special needs there was no waiting. We didn't think special needs would be right for us, since I already had cf, so we went with the biracial babies. In less than 3 months we had a baby in our home. He is now 10 years old.
<br />We have adopted 3 children from Bethany and each time it was a breeze. They are a nonprofit so they don't charge as much as some agencies.
<br />Also, you can look into the local DSS. It is virtually free to adopted, but the wait maybe longer.
<br />Ok, that's my story, good luck
 

christy

New member
I have CF and we adopted from Vietnam in 2002 and China in 2005. At the time of the adoptions I was very healthy, but still afraid about having the CF diagnosis on my paperwork. My dr wrote a letter to include in my dossier which stated that although I had CF, I was very healthy and he could see no reason my condition would hinder my ability to care for a child.

I think when it says "CF" on the dossier, with no other details, the person reading it goes to the internet and sees all the bad stuff about CF, not realizing every CF patient is different and a lot are very healthy. Having the letter from my dr explained MY CF situation in detail, so the reader could see that I was indeed very capable of raising a child.

If you would like to ask more questions, feel free to email me at christyjcribb@aol.com.

christy
 

christy

New member
I have CF and we adopted from Vietnam in 2002 and China in 2005. At the time of the adoptions I was very healthy, but still afraid about having the CF diagnosis on my paperwork. My dr wrote a letter to include in my dossier which stated that although I had CF, I was very healthy and he could see no reason my condition would hinder my ability to care for a child.

I think when it says "CF" on the dossier, with no other details, the person reading it goes to the internet and sees all the bad stuff about CF, not realizing every CF patient is different and a lot are very healthy. Having the letter from my dr explained MY CF situation in detail, so the reader could see that I was indeed very capable of raising a child.

If you would like to ask more questions, feel free to email me at christyjcribb@aol.com.

christy
 

christy

New member
I have CF and we adopted from Vietnam in 2002 and China in 2005. At the time of the adoptions I was very healthy, but still afraid about having the CF diagnosis on my paperwork. My dr wrote a letter to include in my dossier which stated that although I had CF, I was very healthy and he could see no reason my condition would hinder my ability to care for a child.
<br />
<br />I think when it says "CF" on the dossier, with no other details, the person reading it goes to the internet and sees all the bad stuff about CF, not realizing every CF patient is different and a lot are very healthy. Having the letter from my dr explained MY CF situation in detail, so the reader could see that I was indeed very capable of raising a child.
<br />
<br />If you would like to ask more questions, feel free to email me at christyjcribb@aol.com.
<br />
<br />christy
 

4blueeyes

New member
Thank you everyone for your posts. We need as much information as we can get our hands on. FitForCF a special thank you for sharing. We appreciate your story.
 

4blueeyes

New member
Thank you everyone for your posts. We need as much information as we can get our hands on. FitForCF a special thank you for sharing. We appreciate your story.
 

4blueeyes

New member
Thank you everyone for your posts. We need as much information as we can get our hands on. FitForCF a special thank you for sharing. We appreciate your story.
 

julie

New member
Are you two set on adoption or have you considered other alternatives? I ask only because I was told that adoption woudl be easier/cheaper than invitro but as it turned out (at least in our experience) the Invitro was much easier (on the pocketbook AND the emotions).
 

julie

New member
Are you two set on adoption or have you considered other alternatives? I ask only because I was told that adoption woudl be easier/cheaper than invitro but as it turned out (at least in our experience) the Invitro was much easier (on the pocketbook AND the emotions).
 
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