Advanced Directive, health-care proxy, etc..

Emily65Roses

New member
Legally speaking, especially if you have already specified in writing what YOU want, your parents really have no right to overrule your husband, your daughter, and your own wishes.

I think in the case you're thinking of, the woman had never specified what she wanted. So the parents and the husband fought over what she would want. If it's writing, there's no debate.

Mind you that's my non-law school look at it. But I'd say it's not far off.
 

Emily65Roses

New member
Legally speaking, especially if you have already specified in writing what YOU want, your parents really have no right to overrule your husband, your daughter, and your own wishes.

I think in the case you're thinking of, the woman had never specified what she wanted. So the parents and the husband fought over what she would want. If it's writing, there's no debate.

Mind you that's my non-law school look at it. But I'd say it's not far off.
 

Emily65Roses

New member
Legally speaking, especially if you have already specified in writing what YOU want, your parents really have no right to overrule your husband, your daughter, and your own wishes.

I think in the case you're thinking of, the woman had never specified what she wanted. So the parents and the husband fought over what she would want. If it's writing, there's no debate.

Mind you that's my non-law school look at it. But I'd say it's not far off.
 

Emily65Roses

New member
Legally speaking, especially if you have already specified in writing what YOU want, your parents really have no right to overrule your husband, your daughter, and your own wishes.

I think in the case you're thinking of, the woman had never specified what she wanted. So the parents and the husband fought over what she would want. If it's writing, there's no debate.

Mind you that's my non-law school look at it. But I'd say it's not far off.
 

Emily65Roses

New member
Legally speaking, especially if you have already specified in writing what YOU want, your parents really have no right to overrule your husband, your daughter, and your own wishes.
<br />
<br />I think in the case you're thinking of, the woman had never specified what she wanted. So the parents and the husband fought over what she would want. If it's writing, there's no debate.
<br />
<br />Mind you that's my non-law school look at it. But I'd say it's not far off.
 

blondelawyer

New member
To answer Melissa's question (but not give legal advice--gotta CYA), a health care power of attorney or similar document, "trumps" what the commom law or statutory hierarchy for determining who makes the decisions. The issue in the Shaivo case in Florida was that she did not have one of these in place to begin with. And then the husband was with a new woman, etc., so the parents were trying to fight it, etc. In the absence of a document (which everyone should have I might add), the order of who gets to make the decisions is usually set out by statute and will vary from state to state. Spouse is usually the first person who gets to make the decision, so Robert should be covered.

As a practical matter, it is also important to let your family members know what you want done and who you choose to make the decision. Gessner reminds his mother periodically that he and I make the decisions when it comes to his health and she has been very respectful of that. I do worry about some stuff like funeral issues because his family is very religious and we are not. So, I would like him to specify what he wants on some of this stuff in advance, to hopefully aleviate any issues. Anyway, now I am getting the tread off topic, so I will end. Hope I answered your question Mel.
 

blondelawyer

New member
To answer Melissa's question (but not give legal advice--gotta CYA), a health care power of attorney or similar document, "trumps" what the commom law or statutory hierarchy for determining who makes the decisions. The issue in the Shaivo case in Florida was that she did not have one of these in place to begin with. And then the husband was with a new woman, etc., so the parents were trying to fight it, etc. In the absence of a document (which everyone should have I might add), the order of who gets to make the decisions is usually set out by statute and will vary from state to state. Spouse is usually the first person who gets to make the decision, so Robert should be covered.

As a practical matter, it is also important to let your family members know what you want done and who you choose to make the decision. Gessner reminds his mother periodically that he and I make the decisions when it comes to his health and she has been very respectful of that. I do worry about some stuff like funeral issues because his family is very religious and we are not. So, I would like him to specify what he wants on some of this stuff in advance, to hopefully aleviate any issues. Anyway, now I am getting the tread off topic, so I will end. Hope I answered your question Mel.
 

blondelawyer

New member
To answer Melissa's question (but not give legal advice--gotta CYA), a health care power of attorney or similar document, "trumps" what the commom law or statutory hierarchy for determining who makes the decisions. The issue in the Shaivo case in Florida was that she did not have one of these in place to begin with. And then the husband was with a new woman, etc., so the parents were trying to fight it, etc. In the absence of a document (which everyone should have I might add), the order of who gets to make the decisions is usually set out by statute and will vary from state to state. Spouse is usually the first person who gets to make the decision, so Robert should be covered.

As a practical matter, it is also important to let your family members know what you want done and who you choose to make the decision. Gessner reminds his mother periodically that he and I make the decisions when it comes to his health and she has been very respectful of that. I do worry about some stuff like funeral issues because his family is very religious and we are not. So, I would like him to specify what he wants on some of this stuff in advance, to hopefully aleviate any issues. Anyway, now I am getting the tread off topic, so I will end. Hope I answered your question Mel.
 

blondelawyer

New member
To answer Melissa's question (but not give legal advice--gotta CYA), a health care power of attorney or similar document, "trumps" what the commom law or statutory hierarchy for determining who makes the decisions. The issue in the Shaivo case in Florida was that she did not have one of these in place to begin with. And then the husband was with a new woman, etc., so the parents were trying to fight it, etc. In the absence of a document (which everyone should have I might add), the order of who gets to make the decisions is usually set out by statute and will vary from state to state. Spouse is usually the first person who gets to make the decision, so Robert should be covered.

As a practical matter, it is also important to let your family members know what you want done and who you choose to make the decision. Gessner reminds his mother periodically that he and I make the decisions when it comes to his health and she has been very respectful of that. I do worry about some stuff like funeral issues because his family is very religious and we are not. So, I would like him to specify what he wants on some of this stuff in advance, to hopefully aleviate any issues. Anyway, now I am getting the tread off topic, so I will end. Hope I answered your question Mel.
 

blondelawyer

New member
To answer Melissa's question (but not give legal advice--gotta CYA), a health care power of attorney or similar document, "trumps" what the commom law or statutory hierarchy for determining who makes the decisions. The issue in the Shaivo case in Florida was that she did not have one of these in place to begin with. And then the husband was with a new woman, etc., so the parents were trying to fight it, etc. In the absence of a document (which everyone should have I might add), the order of who gets to make the decisions is usually set out by statute and will vary from state to state. Spouse is usually the first person who gets to make the decision, so Robert should be covered.
<br />
<br />As a practical matter, it is also important to let your family members know what you want done and who you choose to make the decision. Gessner reminds his mother periodically that he and I make the decisions when it comes to his health and she has been very respectful of that. I do worry about some stuff like funeral issues because his family is very religious and we are not. So, I would like him to specify what he wants on some of this stuff in advance, to hopefully aleviate any issues. Anyway, now I am getting the tread off topic, so I will end. Hope I answered your question Mel.
 

findingher

New member
I had to sign one my first day at Mass General. My dad is my health care proxy, and it was a tough decision, but I knew he would be better at being objective. I had to sign, my dad did, my mom, and I think one other person as a witness. You just have to make sure you specify what you would want, or know the person you're designating would choose what you want.
 

findingher

New member
I had to sign one my first day at Mass General. My dad is my health care proxy, and it was a tough decision, but I knew he would be better at being objective. I had to sign, my dad did, my mom, and I think one other person as a witness. You just have to make sure you specify what you would want, or know the person you're designating would choose what you want.
 

findingher

New member
I had to sign one my first day at Mass General. My dad is my health care proxy, and it was a tough decision, but I knew he would be better at being objective. I had to sign, my dad did, my mom, and I think one other person as a witness. You just have to make sure you specify what you would want, or know the person you're designating would choose what you want.
 

findingher

New member
I had to sign one my first day at Mass General. My dad is my health care proxy, and it was a tough decision, but I knew he would be better at being objective. I had to sign, my dad did, my mom, and I think one other person as a witness. You just have to make sure you specify what you would want, or know the person you're designating would choose what you want.
 

findingher

New member
I had to sign one my first day at Mass General. My dad is my health care proxy, and it was a tough decision, but I knew he would be better at being objective. I had to sign, my dad did, my mom, and I think one other person as a witness. You just have to make sure you specify what you would want, or know the person you're designating would choose what you want.
 

JazzysMom

New member
Thanks Lisa (and EM)!

I just know that sometimes even with legal documents a fight can persue. The person might not win, but it would be stressful & possibly hold up important decisions.

I have discussed it with my sisters & BFF as well as Robert, but quite honestly havent had "the talk" with my Mom. Part of the reason is I really dont think she will be around much longer, but that really is no excuse.

Again thanks & sorry for hijacking AGAIN
 

JazzysMom

New member
Thanks Lisa (and EM)!

I just know that sometimes even with legal documents a fight can persue. The person might not win, but it would be stressful & possibly hold up important decisions.

I have discussed it with my sisters & BFF as well as Robert, but quite honestly havent had "the talk" with my Mom. Part of the reason is I really dont think she will be around much longer, but that really is no excuse.

Again thanks & sorry for hijacking AGAIN
 

JazzysMom

New member
Thanks Lisa (and EM)!

I just know that sometimes even with legal documents a fight can persue. The person might not win, but it would be stressful & possibly hold up important decisions.

I have discussed it with my sisters & BFF as well as Robert, but quite honestly havent had "the talk" with my Mom. Part of the reason is I really dont think she will be around much longer, but that really is no excuse.

Again thanks & sorry for hijacking AGAIN
 

JazzysMom

New member
Thanks Lisa (and EM)!

I just know that sometimes even with legal documents a fight can persue. The person might not win, but it would be stressful & possibly hold up important decisions.

I have discussed it with my sisters & BFF as well as Robert, but quite honestly havent had "the talk" with my Mom. Part of the reason is I really dont think she will be around much longer, but that really is no excuse.

Again thanks & sorry for hijacking AGAIN
 

JazzysMom

New member
Thanks Lisa (and EM)!
<br />
<br />I just know that sometimes even with legal documents a fight can persue. The person might not win, but it would be stressful & possibly hold up important decisions.
<br />
<br />I have discussed it with my sisters & BFF as well as Robert, but quite honestly havent had "the talk" with my Mom. Part of the reason is I really dont think she will be around much longer, but that really is no excuse.
<br />
<br />Again thanks & sorry for hijacking AGAIN
 
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