I was not the purpose to offend anyone, and I am sorry if I did. But, at the same time I believe that this is a forum for people with cf, cf-carriers and people who perhaps want to know more about the disease. To me the cystic fibrosis forum has been very helpful in actually making the right decision, getting support from other couples in the same situation (there are also many in this forum that understand my choice, and have done or would have made the same decision). But this was my decision based on my knowledge, my life experiences and beliefs and culture. I understand and accept that people can disagree with my choice (by removing a very sick fetus), but I do not think that should be a reason for not being open about it in this forum. This forum is here to help and support people, but we are all very different, and look at things differently. Because of that, I think people may get offended in many different cases. Also, I think this forum would loose quality if it would not face the difficult topics as this. Every day couples face this question, and I think it is great that they can find people of different opinions in this forum, helping to answer their questions and helping them making the decision they believe is the best to them. One of the most important things I have learned during this tough year is that I must accept people as they are. People make decisions that I can disagree with, believe in religions I cannot understand, but it is their life, and I cannot decide or influence that even though I disagree, but of course I can say my opinion! What ends up being the most important thing, is that these people believe that they did the right decision for themselves, that they believe in the religion that makes them happy, that they have chosen the lifestyle that makes them happy. As long as people feel good and happy about their choices I accept it.
We are lucky to get full economic support for PGD here in Norway (as part of the social welfare system) and are in the process of getting help now. But, still I do not know if I will be lucky to become pregnant. I have met women who select healthy fetuses away because their life situation was not "perfect" for a child, and thought I never could do the same. BUT, it is their life, their choice, and I respect that. It might be that also I end up not getting a child, but I still accept what other women choose to do. They have different lives than what I have....
Finally, I did not want this posted topic to be about whether one should abort or not, and I will not discuss why I chose to make this decision. But it was posted because you end up worrying during your whole pregnancy, when you know that you can get a very sick child. Even with PGD, there is a small risk of getting an affected fetus, and when all you want is a healthy child you cannot stop thinking about it. I could never ask if my friends or family felt something was wrong during their pregnancy, as they all have healthy children. I had my worries, and I was wondering if it was related to my red eyes. I see that this worry also is not leading anywhere, as it doesn't help me or anyone else....but I felt so alone.....and as a scientist I was thinking perhaps the fetus secreted out certain substances that my body reacted to...., and perhaps one day, this could help to diagnose at a earlier stage? But I guess that it is just in my wildest fantasy.....
We are lucky to get full economic support for PGD here in Norway (as part of the social welfare system) and are in the process of getting help now. But, still I do not know if I will be lucky to become pregnant. I have met women who select healthy fetuses away because their life situation was not "perfect" for a child, and thought I never could do the same. BUT, it is their life, their choice, and I respect that. It might be that also I end up not getting a child, but I still accept what other women choose to do. They have different lives than what I have....
Finally, I did not want this posted topic to be about whether one should abort or not, and I will not discuss why I chose to make this decision. But it was posted because you end up worrying during your whole pregnancy, when you know that you can get a very sick child. Even with PGD, there is a small risk of getting an affected fetus, and when all you want is a healthy child you cannot stop thinking about it. I could never ask if my friends or family felt something was wrong during their pregnancy, as they all have healthy children. I had my worries, and I was wondering if it was related to my red eyes. I see that this worry also is not leading anywhere, as it doesn't help me or anyone else....but I felt so alone.....and as a scientist I was thinking perhaps the fetus secreted out certain substances that my body reacted to...., and perhaps one day, this could help to diagnose at a earlier stage? But I guess that it is just in my wildest fantasy.....