Fighting to do the vest

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folione

New member
My boy is the same age and also looks for opportunities to flex his authority. I made up my mind not to let these conflicts escalate into fights or to make threats that I either can't follow through with or that would be worse than just skipping the vest and doing manual CPT that time. I've only got a few hours a day with him when I get home from work so I just can't bear spending part of it angry at each other.

Usually what happens when he's in a mood to battle is that we have a verbal back and forth for awhile and I drop it for a half hour or so and play with him; then I just get the gear set up and lay out the vest on his chair in front of the TV (his usual mode of vest treatments) and lead him into it with no further discussion except perhaps telling him something like "what show do you want to watch?" or "we're doing the vest now and after it's done, what do you want for snack/dinner/etc". This works most of the time, but when it doesn't I either wait and try again a bit later or if time is running short I'll chase him down and do manual CPT - which he does not like any more, so most of the time it's enough to convince him to go back to the vest.

good luck.
 
M

Mommafirst

Guest
My daughter is not old enough for the vest yet, but I have a 3 year old and 5 year old, so I know all about the power struggles. I'm sure I'll be in your shoes asking for advice in a few years. All I can say is stay firm! I've had power struggles with my boys over things much less important than the vest, but eventually if they know they can't win the battle, they will accept it. I wish I had more to offer you, but know that I feel your pain already as I look forward to my own future!!
 
M

Mommafirst

Guest
My daughter is not old enough for the vest yet, but I have a 3 year old and 5 year old, so I know all about the power struggles. I'm sure I'll be in your shoes asking for advice in a few years. All I can say is stay firm! I've had power struggles with my boys over things much less important than the vest, but eventually if they know they can't win the battle, they will accept it. I wish I had more to offer you, but know that I feel your pain already as I look forward to my own future!!
 
M

Mommafirst

Guest
My daughter is not old enough for the vest yet, but I have a 3 year old and 5 year old, so I know all about the power struggles. I'm sure I'll be in your shoes asking for advice in a few years. All I can say is stay firm! I've had power struggles with my boys over things much less important than the vest, but eventually if they know they can't win the battle, they will accept it. I wish I had more to offer you, but know that I feel your pain already as I look forward to my own future!!
 
D

ddawes27

Guest
My son gets a "SATURDAY SURPISE" ......How he gets it is that he needs to take his meds (some he hates and does not squalk about it.) Every night he has to be cooperative with his nettie-pot, his nebilizer and the vest. I use the "Saturday Surprise all week, for anytime my son acts up, he is told that the Saturday surprise might not be able to happen. It works like a charm and gives my son a reward for doing things that other kids don't need to deal with, but he does.
 
D

ddawes27

Guest
My son gets a "SATURDAY SURPISE" ......How he gets it is that he needs to take his meds (some he hates and does not squalk about it.) Every night he has to be cooperative with his nettie-pot, his nebilizer and the vest. I use the "Saturday Surprise all week, for anytime my son acts up, he is told that the Saturday surprise might not be able to happen. It works like a charm and gives my son a reward for doing things that other kids don't need to deal with, but he does.
 
D

ddawes27

Guest
My son gets a "SATURDAY SURPISE" ......How he gets it is that he needs to take his meds (some he hates and does not squalk about it.) Every night he has to be cooperative with his nettie-pot, his nebilizer and the vest. I use the "Saturday Surprise all week, for anytime my son acts up, he is told that the Saturday surprise might not be able to happen. It works like a charm and gives my son a reward for doing things that other kids don't need to deal with, but he does.
 
K

ktsmom

New member
I think the lowest point in my life was when I had to resort to a 'pop' for Katy to get her to cooperate with the vest. It was the classic stressed-out parent and kid set up, and it resulted in the predictable result. I cried, she cried. What a disaster.

I have since had to summon all of my patience and mommy know-how, and use it all the time, which can be so so tough.

Sometimes I don't announce that we're about to do such and such. I just pick her up and take her to the equipment and put the vest on, or the neb, or whatever, and just keep making soothing small talk with her. Thank goodness she is still tiny and I can actually carry her!

Like folione posted, though, sometimes the conflict escalates and no one will win. I just have to walk away and try it later. But when there is only so much time in the day................aaargh!

The bottom line is that we keep stressing that this is just a fact of her life - her body needs extra help to stay healthy. We have to accomodate the fact that she is three and wants to be in control, but also lay the groundwork for a lifetime of treatment compliance.

Dana
Mom to Katy (3, cf) and Kyra (6, no cf)
 
K

ktsmom

New member
I think the lowest point in my life was when I had to resort to a 'pop' for Katy to get her to cooperate with the vest. It was the classic stressed-out parent and kid set up, and it resulted in the predictable result. I cried, she cried. What a disaster.

I have since had to summon all of my patience and mommy know-how, and use it all the time, which can be so so tough.

Sometimes I don't announce that we're about to do such and such. I just pick her up and take her to the equipment and put the vest on, or the neb, or whatever, and just keep making soothing small talk with her. Thank goodness she is still tiny and I can actually carry her!

Like folione posted, though, sometimes the conflict escalates and no one will win. I just have to walk away and try it later. But when there is only so much time in the day................aaargh!

The bottom line is that we keep stressing that this is just a fact of her life - her body needs extra help to stay healthy. We have to accomodate the fact that she is three and wants to be in control, but also lay the groundwork for a lifetime of treatment compliance.

Dana
Mom to Katy (3, cf) and Kyra (6, no cf)
 
K

ktsmom

New member
I think the lowest point in my life was when I had to resort to a 'pop' for Katy to get her to cooperate with the vest. It was the classic stressed-out parent and kid set up, and it resulted in the predictable result. I cried, she cried. What a disaster.

I have since had to summon all of my patience and mommy know-how, and use it all the time, which can be so so tough.

Sometimes I don't announce that we're about to do such and such. I just pick her up and take her to the equipment and put the vest on, or the neb, or whatever, and just keep making soothing small talk with her. Thank goodness she is still tiny and I can actually carry her!

Like folione posted, though, sometimes the conflict escalates and no one will win. I just have to walk away and try it later. But when there is only so much time in the day................aaargh!

The bottom line is that we keep stressing that this is just a fact of her life - her body needs extra help to stay healthy. We have to accomodate the fact that she is three and wants to be in control, but also lay the groundwork for a lifetime of treatment compliance.

Dana
Mom to Katy (3, cf) and Kyra (6, no cf)
 
K

kayleesgrandma

New member
Leah, Kaylee is starting to do that too! She will object to getting the vest on, and then when on, will either say that "her mother said she didn't have to do it"--if I'm giving treatmen, or "grandma said I didn't have to do it"--if her mom is giving treatment!! She will also say she has to go to the bathroom, even though she just wnet. And will turn down the vest if we aren't there to watch. Someone is usually with her during treatments. But most of time when I do it, I have to hold her and make her do treatment. What fun!
 
K

kayleesgrandma

New member
Leah, Kaylee is starting to do that too! She will object to getting the vest on, and then when on, will either say that "her mother said she didn't have to do it"--if I'm giving treatmen, or "grandma said I didn't have to do it"--if her mom is giving treatment!! She will also say she has to go to the bathroom, even though she just wnet. And will turn down the vest if we aren't there to watch. Someone is usually with her during treatments. But most of time when I do it, I have to hold her and make her do treatment. What fun!
 
K

kayleesgrandma

New member
Leah, Kaylee is starting to do that too! She will object to getting the vest on, and then when on, will either say that "her mother said she didn't have to do it"--if I'm giving treatmen, or "grandma said I didn't have to do it"--if her mom is giving treatment!! She will also say she has to go to the bathroom, even though she just wnet. And will turn down the vest if we aren't there to watch. Someone is usually with her during treatments. But most of time when I do it, I have to hold her and make her do treatment. What fun!
 
M

MOME2RT

New member
Yeah, Reece IF I can manage to get it on him, he will di it until a certain amount of time has gone by BUT not the full 30 min. So Ive been setting it at like 50 or 60min cuz he wants to cut it off when it gets to 21 or 31 min left. So last night I set it at 30 min & he cut it off at 13 min left. He had a new game....so thats why I had no problems last night! Even if me or dad is in there he will insist on cutting it off or throwing a fit until it gets cut off!
 
M

MOME2RT

New member
Yeah, Reece IF I can manage to get it on him, he will di it until a certain amount of time has gone by BUT not the full 30 min. So Ive been setting it at like 50 or 60min cuz he wants to cut it off when it gets to 21 or 31 min left. So last night I set it at 30 min & he cut it off at 13 min left. He had a new game....so thats why I had no problems last night! Even if me or dad is in there he will insist on cutting it off or throwing a fit until it gets cut off!
 
M

MOME2RT

New member
Yeah, Reece IF I can manage to get it on him, he will di it until a certain amount of time has gone by BUT not the full 30 min. So Ive been setting it at like 50 or 60min cuz he wants to cut it off when it gets to 21 or 31 min left. So last night I set it at 30 min & he cut it off at 13 min left. He had a new game....so thats why I had no problems last night! Even if me or dad is in there he will insist on cutting it off or throwing a fit until it gets cut off!
 
R

Ratatosk

Administrator
Staff member
Max usually starts off by saying no or saying he'll do the vest if we let him do it slow. Once we get the vest on him, pick out his favorite show. We've been recording several of his favorites, so he can choose whatever he wants, gets a snack and he's usually good to go. So we have initial problems once in a while when he's overly tired, but once we get started, turn up the speed, volume on the tv, we're good to go.

He claims he wants CPT instead, but when he used to get CPT, he'd try to get out of that, too.
 
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