I'm a carrier...

A

AnnaH

New member
My parents were in the same situation, and they chose to have kids.
Me and my brother(first born), both have CF. My brother is very healthy- Lung function above normal, pancretic sufficient. I've got "moderate" CF- PI, lung function a bit above half of normal, some big issues with coughing up blood, and iv antibiotics 2 or 3 times a year.
My little sister is a carrier, and they had a baby who died at less than a month because of complications of MI surgery .

I agree with the person who mentioned PGD- there have been a few families i know who have done it, and they've been happy. There is a chance your kid would have CF- but it's much less than 25%. Adoption is also a great option.

Personally, i would *never* take the 1 in 4 chance. Ever. Would you shoot at your child if you only had a 25% chance of hitting them? Probably not.

As someone who's parents made the choice, i will say that i get angry at them sometimes. I don't regret being born, but CF is TOUGH, and as of now there is no cure. Despite advances, we all still die young, and some kids do die very young.
There are ways of drastically reducing your chances of having a CF kid, and in my biased opionion it's morally wrong to not try them.
 
A

AnnaH

New member
My parents were in the same situation, and they chose to have kids.
Me and my brother(first born), both have CF. My brother is very healthy- Lung function above normal, pancretic sufficient. I've got "moderate" CF- PI, lung function a bit above half of normal, some big issues with coughing up blood, and iv antibiotics 2 or 3 times a year.
My little sister is a carrier, and they had a baby who died at less than a month because of complications of MI surgery .

I agree with the person who mentioned PGD- there have been a few families i know who have done it, and they've been happy. There is a chance your kid would have CF- but it's much less than 25%. Adoption is also a great option.

Personally, i would *never* take the 1 in 4 chance. Ever. Would you shoot at your child if you only had a 25% chance of hitting them? Probably not.

As someone who's parents made the choice, i will say that i get angry at them sometimes. I don't regret being born, but CF is TOUGH, and as of now there is no cure. Despite advances, we all still die young, and some kids do die very young.
There are ways of drastically reducing your chances of having a CF kid, and in my biased opionion it's morally wrong to not try them.
 
A

AnnaH

New member
My parents were in the same situation, and they chose to have kids.
Me and my brother(first born), both have CF. My brother is very healthy- Lung function above normal, pancretic sufficient. I've got "moderate" CF- PI, lung function a bit above half of normal, some big issues with coughing up blood, and iv antibiotics 2 or 3 times a year.
My little sister is a carrier, and they had a baby who died at less than a month because of complications of MI surgery .

I agree with the person who mentioned PGD- there have been a few families i know who have done it, and they've been happy. There is a chance your kid would have CF- but it's much less than 25%. Adoption is also a great option.

Personally, i would *never* take the 1 in 4 chance. Ever. Would you shoot at your child if you only had a 25% chance of hitting them? Probably not.

As someone who's parents made the choice, i will say that i get angry at them sometimes. I don't regret being born, but CF is TOUGH, and as of now there is no cure. Despite advances, we all still die young, and some kids do die very young.
There are ways of drastically reducing your chances of having a CF kid, and in my biased opionion it's morally wrong to not try them.
 
A

AnnaH

New member
My parents were in the same situation, and they chose to have kids.
Me and my brother(first born), both have CF. My brother is very healthy- Lung function above normal, pancretic sufficient. I've got "moderate" CF- PI, lung function a bit above half of normal, some big issues with coughing up blood, and iv antibiotics 2 or 3 times a year.
My little sister is a carrier, and they had a baby who died at less than a month because of complications of MI surgery .

I agree with the person who mentioned PGD- there have been a few families i know who have done it, and they've been happy. There is a chance your kid would have CF- but it's much less than 25%. Adoption is also a great option.

Personally, i would *never* take the 1 in 4 chance. Ever. Would you shoot at your child if you only had a 25% chance of hitting them? Probably not.

As someone who's parents made the choice, i will say that i get angry at them sometimes. I don't regret being born, but CF is TOUGH, and as of now there is no cure. Despite advances, we all still die young, and some kids do die very young.
There are ways of drastically reducing your chances of having a CF kid, and in my biased opionion it's morally wrong to not try them.
 
A

AnnaH

New member
My parents were in the same situation, and they chose to have kids.
Me and my brother(first born), both have CF. My brother is very healthy- Lung function above normal, pancretic sufficient. I've got "moderate" CF- PI, lung function a bit above half of normal, some big issues with coughing up blood, and iv antibiotics 2 or 3 times a year.
My little sister is a carrier, and they had a baby who died at less than a month because of complications of MI surgery .

I agree with the person who mentioned PGD- there have been a few families i know who have done it, and they've been happy. There is a chance your kid would have CF- but it's much less than 25%. Adoption is also a great option.

Personally, i would *never* take the 1 in 4 chance. Ever. Would you shoot at your child if you only had a 25% chance of hitting them? Probably not.

As someone who's parents made the choice, i will say that i get angry at them sometimes. I don't regret being born, but CF is TOUGH, and as of now there is no cure. Despite advances, we all still die young, and some kids do die very young.
There are ways of drastically reducing your chances of having a CF kid, and in my biased opionion it's morally wrong to not try them.
 
K

Keepercjr

Guest
<div class="FTQUOTE"><begin quote><i>Originally posted by: <b>AnnaH</b></i>


Personally, i would *never* take the 1 in 4 chance. Ever. Would you shoot at your child if you only had a 25% chance of hitting them? Probably not.


</end quote></div>

I think that was a bit harsh!

I would <i>never </i>equate carrying a CF child to term as shooting them! My parents had my brother after knowing I had CF. Turns out he had CF too and died at age 13. I am not angry at my parents 1 bit. For all I know my brother wasn't a planned pregnancy and there was no way to test for CF back then. I do know that my dad had a vasectomy after my brother was born.

Personally I would not terminate a CF pregnancy (I am pro choice) but that doesn't give anyone else the right to call my decision irresponsible or wrong. We all make decisions that are best for us and our families. Luckily my DH is not a carrier so that is not something we'll have to deal with. I would not try to get pregnant if he were a carrier (unless we did IVF or used donor sperm) because then the odds would be 50/50 but I wouldn't stop a pregnancy that had already happened. It kind of makes me sad to think that people terminate due to CF although I totally respect their right to make the choices that are right for them.

My view isn't as popular but if DH and I were both carriers only I think we might have decided to have kids anyway. Don't really know though because I'll never have to walk that mile. If we had the money then for sure we'd do PGD but all the ways of reducing the chance of a CF baby are <i>very </i>expensive except abortion.
 
K

Keepercjr

Guest
<div class="FTQUOTE"><begin quote><i>Originally posted by: <b>AnnaH</b></i>


Personally, i would *never* take the 1 in 4 chance. Ever. Would you shoot at your child if you only had a 25% chance of hitting them? Probably not.


</end quote></div>

I think that was a bit harsh!

I would <i>never </i>equate carrying a CF child to term as shooting them! My parents had my brother after knowing I had CF. Turns out he had CF too and died at age 13. I am not angry at my parents 1 bit. For all I know my brother wasn't a planned pregnancy and there was no way to test for CF back then. I do know that my dad had a vasectomy after my brother was born.

Personally I would not terminate a CF pregnancy (I am pro choice) but that doesn't give anyone else the right to call my decision irresponsible or wrong. We all make decisions that are best for us and our families. Luckily my DH is not a carrier so that is not something we'll have to deal with. I would not try to get pregnant if he were a carrier (unless we did IVF or used donor sperm) because then the odds would be 50/50 but I wouldn't stop a pregnancy that had already happened. It kind of makes me sad to think that people terminate due to CF although I totally respect their right to make the choices that are right for them.

My view isn't as popular but if DH and I were both carriers only I think we might have decided to have kids anyway. Don't really know though because I'll never have to walk that mile. If we had the money then for sure we'd do PGD but all the ways of reducing the chance of a CF baby are <i>very </i>expensive except abortion.
 
K

Keepercjr

Guest
<div class="FTQUOTE"><begin quote><i>Originally posted by: <b>AnnaH</b></i>


Personally, i would *never* take the 1 in 4 chance. Ever. Would you shoot at your child if you only had a 25% chance of hitting them? Probably not.


</end quote></div>

I think that was a bit harsh!

I would <i>never </i>equate carrying a CF child to term as shooting them! My parents had my brother after knowing I had CF. Turns out he had CF too and died at age 13. I am not angry at my parents 1 bit. For all I know my brother wasn't a planned pregnancy and there was no way to test for CF back then. I do know that my dad had a vasectomy after my brother was born.

Personally I would not terminate a CF pregnancy (I am pro choice) but that doesn't give anyone else the right to call my decision irresponsible or wrong. We all make decisions that are best for us and our families. Luckily my DH is not a carrier so that is not something we'll have to deal with. I would not try to get pregnant if he were a carrier (unless we did IVF or used donor sperm) because then the odds would be 50/50 but I wouldn't stop a pregnancy that had already happened. It kind of makes me sad to think that people terminate due to CF although I totally respect their right to make the choices that are right for them.

My view isn't as popular but if DH and I were both carriers only I think we might have decided to have kids anyway. Don't really know though because I'll never have to walk that mile. If we had the money then for sure we'd do PGD but all the ways of reducing the chance of a CF baby are <i>very </i>expensive except abortion.
 
K

Keepercjr

Guest
<div class="FTQUOTE"><begin quote><i>Originally posted by: <b>AnnaH</b></i>


Personally, i would *never* take the 1 in 4 chance. Ever. Would you shoot at your child if you only had a 25% chance of hitting them? Probably not.


</end quote>

I think that was a bit harsh!

I would <i>never </i>equate carrying a CF child to term as shooting them! My parents had my brother after knowing I had CF. Turns out he had CF too and died at age 13. I am not angry at my parents 1 bit. For all I know my brother wasn't a planned pregnancy and there was no way to test for CF back then. I do know that my dad had a vasectomy after my brother was born.

Personally I would not terminate a CF pregnancy (I am pro choice) but that doesn't give anyone else the right to call my decision irresponsible or wrong. We all make decisions that are best for us and our families. Luckily my DH is not a carrier so that is not something we'll have to deal with. I would not try to get pregnant if he were a carrier (unless we did IVF or used donor sperm) because then the odds would be 50/50 but I wouldn't stop a pregnancy that had already happened. It kind of makes me sad to think that people terminate due to CF although I totally respect their right to make the choices that are right for them.

My view isn't as popular but if DH and I were both carriers only I think we might have decided to have kids anyway. Don't really know though because I'll never have to walk that mile. If we had the money then for sure we'd do PGD but all the ways of reducing the chance of a CF baby are <i>very </i>expensive except abortion.
 
K

Keepercjr

Guest
<div class="FTQUOTE"><begin quote><i>Originally posted by: <b>AnnaH</b></i>


Personally, i would *never* take the 1 in 4 chance. Ever. Would you shoot at your child if you only had a 25% chance of hitting them? Probably not.


</end quote>

I think that was a bit harsh!

I would <i>never </i>equate carrying a CF child to term as shooting them! My parents had my brother after knowing I had CF. Turns out he had CF too and died at age 13. I am not angry at my parents 1 bit. For all I know my brother wasn't a planned pregnancy and there was no way to test for CF back then. I do know that my dad had a vasectomy after my brother was born.

Personally I would not terminate a CF pregnancy (I am pro choice) but that doesn't give anyone else the right to call my decision irresponsible or wrong. We all make decisions that are best for us and our families. Luckily my DH is not a carrier so that is not something we'll have to deal with. I would not try to get pregnant if he were a carrier (unless we did IVF or used donor sperm) because then the odds would be 50/50 but I wouldn't stop a pregnancy that had already happened. It kind of makes me sad to think that people terminate due to CF although I totally respect their right to make the choices that are right for them.

My view isn't as popular but if DH and I were both carriers only I think we might have decided to have kids anyway. Don't really know though because I'll never have to walk that mile. If we had the money then for sure we'd do PGD but all the ways of reducing the chance of a CF baby are <i>very </i>expensive except abortion.
 
A

AnnaH

New member
<div class="FTQUOTE"><begin quote><i>Originally posted by: <b>Keepercjr</b></i>




I think that was a bit harsh!



I would <i>never </i>equate carrying a CF child to term as shooting them! My parents had my brother after knowing I had CF. Turns out he had CF too and died at age 13. I am not angry at my parents 1 bit. For all I know my brother wasn't a planned pregnancy and there was no way to test for CF back then. I do know that my dad had a vasectomy after my brother was born.



.</end quote></div>

Same odds, kid's going to end up dead either way. CF just takes longer.
I'm just saying as a child of parents who KNEW, i will never forgive them for that. I hope it bothers them as much as it bothers me- and yes, when i die, probably young, it will be their fault. I definitly feel that the killed my younger brother. They had other options. I'm dont think they're horrible people, i think they made a horrible decision.
I personally agree with the example, which is why i posted it.

I actually agree with you on abortion. I don't think *i* would abort a kid with CF(although i do understand the reasoning- and would think hard). The issue is prevention.

I think PGD/adoption is much cheaper than raising a CF child, even with good insurance. I don't know who much money my parents have lost from hospitalizations, food and the like. I'm willing to bet that in the long run it ends up cheaper. Then you have the moral issues, and you really can't price that.

Also, some insurance companys will pay for PGD. The one my parents have(blue cross in canada) would have paid for much of it. It seems that they're coming around to the idea that it's cheaper than 18 odd years of CF meds.

And for the OP- most people in this section have fairly mild CF. You'd get a broader range of answers in the adults section.
 
A

AnnaH

New member
<div class="FTQUOTE"><begin quote><i>Originally posted by: <b>Keepercjr</b></i>




I think that was a bit harsh!



I would <i>never </i>equate carrying a CF child to term as shooting them! My parents had my brother after knowing I had CF. Turns out he had CF too and died at age 13. I am not angry at my parents 1 bit. For all I know my brother wasn't a planned pregnancy and there was no way to test for CF back then. I do know that my dad had a vasectomy after my brother was born.



.</end quote></div>

Same odds, kid's going to end up dead either way. CF just takes longer.
I'm just saying as a child of parents who KNEW, i will never forgive them for that. I hope it bothers them as much as it bothers me- and yes, when i die, probably young, it will be their fault. I definitly feel that the killed my younger brother. They had other options. I'm dont think they're horrible people, i think they made a horrible decision.
I personally agree with the example, which is why i posted it.

I actually agree with you on abortion. I don't think *i* would abort a kid with CF(although i do understand the reasoning- and would think hard). The issue is prevention.

I think PGD/adoption is much cheaper than raising a CF child, even with good insurance. I don't know who much money my parents have lost from hospitalizations, food and the like. I'm willing to bet that in the long run it ends up cheaper. Then you have the moral issues, and you really can't price that.

Also, some insurance companys will pay for PGD. The one my parents have(blue cross in canada) would have paid for much of it. It seems that they're coming around to the idea that it's cheaper than 18 odd years of CF meds.

And for the OP- most people in this section have fairly mild CF. You'd get a broader range of answers in the adults section.
 
A

AnnaH

New member
<div class="FTQUOTE"><begin quote><i>Originally posted by: <b>Keepercjr</b></i>




I think that was a bit harsh!



I would <i>never </i>equate carrying a CF child to term as shooting them! My parents had my brother after knowing I had CF. Turns out he had CF too and died at age 13. I am not angry at my parents 1 bit. For all I know my brother wasn't a planned pregnancy and there was no way to test for CF back then. I do know that my dad had a vasectomy after my brother was born.



.</end quote></div>

Same odds, kid's going to end up dead either way. CF just takes longer.
I'm just saying as a child of parents who KNEW, i will never forgive them for that. I hope it bothers them as much as it bothers me- and yes, when i die, probably young, it will be their fault. I definitly feel that the killed my younger brother. They had other options. I'm dont think they're horrible people, i think they made a horrible decision.
I personally agree with the example, which is why i posted it.

I actually agree with you on abortion. I don't think *i* would abort a kid with CF(although i do understand the reasoning- and would think hard). The issue is prevention.

I think PGD/adoption is much cheaper than raising a CF child, even with good insurance. I don't know who much money my parents have lost from hospitalizations, food and the like. I'm willing to bet that in the long run it ends up cheaper. Then you have the moral issues, and you really can't price that.

Also, some insurance companys will pay for PGD. The one my parents have(blue cross in canada) would have paid for much of it. It seems that they're coming around to the idea that it's cheaper than 18 odd years of CF meds.

And for the OP- most people in this section have fairly mild CF. You'd get a broader range of answers in the adults section.
 
A

AnnaH

New member
<div class="FTQUOTE"><begin quote><i>Originally posted by: <b>Keepercjr</b></i>




I think that was a bit harsh!



I would <i>never </i>equate carrying a CF child to term as shooting them! My parents had my brother after knowing I had CF. Turns out he had CF too and died at age 13. I am not angry at my parents 1 bit. For all I know my brother wasn't a planned pregnancy and there was no way to test for CF back then. I do know that my dad had a vasectomy after my brother was born.



.</end quote>

Same odds, kid's going to end up dead either way. CF just takes longer.
I'm just saying as a child of parents who KNEW, i will never forgive them for that. I hope it bothers them as much as it bothers me- and yes, when i die, probably young, it will be their fault. I definitly feel that the killed my younger brother. They had other options. I'm dont think they're horrible people, i think they made a horrible decision.
I personally agree with the example, which is why i posted it.

I actually agree with you on abortion. I don't think *i* would abort a kid with CF(although i do understand the reasoning- and would think hard). The issue is prevention.

I think PGD/adoption is much cheaper than raising a CF child, even with good insurance. I don't know who much money my parents have lost from hospitalizations, food and the like. I'm willing to bet that in the long run it ends up cheaper. Then you have the moral issues, and you really can't price that.

Also, some insurance companys will pay for PGD. The one my parents have(blue cross in canada) would have paid for much of it. It seems that they're coming around to the idea that it's cheaper than 18 odd years of CF meds.

And for the OP- most people in this section have fairly mild CF. You'd get a broader range of answers in the adults section.
 
A

AnnaH

New member
<div class="FTQUOTE"><begin quote><i>Originally posted by: <b>Keepercjr</b></i>




I think that was a bit harsh!



I would <i>never </i>equate carrying a CF child to term as shooting them! My parents had my brother after knowing I had CF. Turns out he had CF too and died at age 13. I am not angry at my parents 1 bit. For all I know my brother wasn't a planned pregnancy and there was no way to test for CF back then. I do know that my dad had a vasectomy after my brother was born.



.</end quote>

Same odds, kid's going to end up dead either way. CF just takes longer.
I'm just saying as a child of parents who KNEW, i will never forgive them for that. I hope it bothers them as much as it bothers me- and yes, when i die, probably young, it will be their fault. I definitly feel that the killed my younger brother. They had other options. I'm dont think they're horrible people, i think they made a horrible decision.
I personally agree with the example, which is why i posted it.

I actually agree with you on abortion. I don't think *i* would abort a kid with CF(although i do understand the reasoning- and would think hard). The issue is prevention.

I think PGD/adoption is much cheaper than raising a CF child, even with good insurance. I don't know who much money my parents have lost from hospitalizations, food and the like. I'm willing to bet that in the long run it ends up cheaper. Then you have the moral issues, and you really can't price that.

Also, some insurance companys will pay for PGD. The one my parents have(blue cross in canada) would have paid for much of it. It seems that they're coming around to the idea that it's cheaper than 18 odd years of CF meds.

And for the OP- most people in this section have fairly mild CF. You'd get a broader range of answers in the adults section.
 
K

Keepercjr

Guest
Anna

Anger and wishing guilt on someone are not healthy feelings. I had a lot of anger at my parents for not telling me I had CF till I was about 14 (was diagnosed as a baby). I was healthy and I guess my mom was in denial and questioned the diagnosis so they never said anything. But I worked through it and I forgive them. It sounds like you have a lot of work to do regarding the feelings you are carrying around. They are a heavy burden that will feel much better once you let it go.
 
K

Keepercjr

Guest
Anna

Anger and wishing guilt on someone are not healthy feelings. I had a lot of anger at my parents for not telling me I had CF till I was about 14 (was diagnosed as a baby). I was healthy and I guess my mom was in denial and questioned the diagnosis so they never said anything. But I worked through it and I forgive them. It sounds like you have a lot of work to do regarding the feelings you are carrying around. They are a heavy burden that will feel much better once you let it go.
 
K

Keepercjr

Guest
Anna

Anger and wishing guilt on someone are not healthy feelings. I had a lot of anger at my parents for not telling me I had CF till I was about 14 (was diagnosed as a baby). I was healthy and I guess my mom was in denial and questioned the diagnosis so they never said anything. But I worked through it and I forgive them. It sounds like you have a lot of work to do regarding the feelings you are carrying around. They are a heavy burden that will feel much better once you let it go.
 
K

Keepercjr

Guest
Anna

Anger and wishing guilt on someone are not healthy feelings. I had a lot of anger at my parents for not telling me I had CF till I was about 14 (was diagnosed as a baby). I was healthy and I guess my mom was in denial and questioned the diagnosis so they never said anything. But I worked through it and I forgive them. It sounds like you have a lot of work to do regarding the feelings you are carrying around. They are a heavy burden that will feel much better once you let it go.
 
K

Keepercjr

Guest
Anna

Anger and wishing guilt on someone are not healthy feelings. I had a lot of anger at my parents for not telling me I had CF till I was about 14 (was diagnosed as a baby). I was healthy and I guess my mom was in denial and questioned the diagnosis so they never said anything. But I worked through it and I forgive them. It sounds like you have a lot of work to do regarding the feelings you are carrying around. They are a heavy burden that will feel much better once you let it go.
 
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