Insensitive people!

E

Emily65Roses

New member
I once had a nurse... she was really fun, she let me and Mike get away with murder. We ordered Chinese at like 11:00 pm and because the elevator gets locked after hours, she gave Mike the combination, so he could get back up after picking up our food. Anyways, we once requested a "do not disturb" sign because we were adults looking to have adult time. <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-wink.gif" border="0"> She laughed and told me her brother had CF and died, and he used to pull sh*t like that all the time. That I reminded her a lot of him. And perhaps it was because of the context, perhaps because it was a nurse... but I personally found it a HUGE compliment. Period.

I'm not jumping up anyone's @ss, but talking about CFers who died is important. Also period. What good is Ry's struggle and short but inspiring life... if Allie can't talk about it? Mind you, I didn't read all the responses, just the "just because a person knows blah blah doesn't mean they're obligated to pass on the bad news." And that pissed me off quite frankly. So there it is. Anyone who feels like crucifying me for it, by all means. But if you do, you can kiss my fanny.
 
E

Emily65Roses

New member
I once had a nurse... she was really fun, she let me and Mike get away with murder. We ordered Chinese at like 11:00 pm and because the elevator gets locked after hours, she gave Mike the combination, so he could get back up after picking up our food. Anyways, we once requested a "do not disturb" sign because we were adults looking to have adult time. <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-wink.gif" border="0"> She laughed and told me her brother had CF and died, and he used to pull sh*t like that all the time. That I reminded her a lot of him. And perhaps it was because of the context, perhaps because it was a nurse... but I personally found it a HUGE compliment. Period.

I'm not jumping up anyone's @ss, but talking about CFers who died is important. Also period. What good is Ry's struggle and short but inspiring life... if Allie can't talk about it? Mind you, I didn't read all the responses, just the "just because a person knows blah blah doesn't mean they're obligated to pass on the bad news." And that pissed me off quite frankly. So there it is. Anyone who feels like crucifying me for it, by all means. But if you do, you can kiss my fanny.
 
E

Emily65Roses

New member
I once had a nurse... she was really fun, she let me and Mike get away with murder. We ordered Chinese at like 11:00 pm and because the elevator gets locked after hours, she gave Mike the combination, so he could get back up after picking up our food. Anyways, we once requested a "do not disturb" sign because we were adults looking to have adult time. <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-wink.gif" border="0"> She laughed and told me her brother had CF and died, and he used to pull sh*t like that all the time. That I reminded her a lot of him. And perhaps it was because of the context, perhaps because it was a nurse... but I personally found it a HUGE compliment. Period.

I'm not jumping up anyone's @ss, but talking about CFers who died is important. Also period. What good is Ry's struggle and short but inspiring life... if Allie can't talk about it? Mind you, I didn't read all the responses, just the "just because a person knows blah blah doesn't mean they're obligated to pass on the bad news." And that pissed me off quite frankly. So there it is. Anyone who feels like crucifying me for it, by all means. But if you do, you can kiss my fanny.
 
E

Emily65Roses

New member
Oh and for reference... Lauren, I agree with many others. Though perhaps misguided and unnecessary, I think the guy was just trying to relate to you. CF is such a random weird thing that most people don't have a damn clue about. So when you say you have it, they try to scrounge up ANY tiny piece of information they may have on it. If it means they mention "I knew someone with it who died," then they'll say it just to have something to say. Most people when they hear cystic fibrosis, if they know anything about it, don't know a damn thing to say. I guarantee he didn't realize he was being what you saw as insensitive.

The other thing... People take cues from you. If you say you have CF, and then say "Hey sh*t happens... at least I wasn't abducted by aliens. And hell, I know I'll never get old or wrinkly!" or something similarly ridiculous (doesn't need to be that childish and stupid, it's just the only thing I thought of right now), they will take the cue from you and relax. Once you tell someone, you really kind of have to lighten the mood a bit. <b>BY ALL MEANS, use the opportunity to educate.</b> And educate 100% truthfully, no need to cover in sugar. But educate in a lighter manner (this is especially if it's someone you don't know well, and you're not sitting down to have a serious conversation about it), and they will lighten up too. Whenever I tell people about it, I answer questions seriously, but I'm sure to throw in some things like "Hey no adult diapers! I won't get that old!" or "Well at least my tattoos won't stretch and wrinkle" etc. They lighten up, feel more free to ask questions, don't feel as awkward, and are less likely to try to search for *anything* they can say, and just allow you to educate them. That's my experience anyway. <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-smile.gif" border="0">
 
E

Emily65Roses

New member
Oh and for reference... Lauren, I agree with many others. Though perhaps misguided and unnecessary, I think the guy was just trying to relate to you. CF is such a random weird thing that most people don't have a damn clue about. So when you say you have it, they try to scrounge up ANY tiny piece of information they may have on it. If it means they mention "I knew someone with it who died," then they'll say it just to have something to say. Most people when they hear cystic fibrosis, if they know anything about it, don't know a damn thing to say. I guarantee he didn't realize he was being what you saw as insensitive.

The other thing... People take cues from you. If you say you have CF, and then say "Hey sh*t happens... at least I wasn't abducted by aliens. And hell, I know I'll never get old or wrinkly!" or something similarly ridiculous (doesn't need to be that childish and stupid, it's just the only thing I thought of right now), they will take the cue from you and relax. Once you tell someone, you really kind of have to lighten the mood a bit. <b>BY ALL MEANS, use the opportunity to educate.</b> And educate 100% truthfully, no need to cover in sugar. But educate in a lighter manner (this is especially if it's someone you don't know well, and you're not sitting down to have a serious conversation about it), and they will lighten up too. Whenever I tell people about it, I answer questions seriously, but I'm sure to throw in some things like "Hey no adult diapers! I won't get that old!" or "Well at least my tattoos won't stretch and wrinkle" etc. They lighten up, feel more free to ask questions, don't feel as awkward, and are less likely to try to search for *anything* they can say, and just allow you to educate them. That's my experience anyway. <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-smile.gif" border="0">
 
E

Emily65Roses

New member
Oh and for reference... Lauren, I agree with many others. Though perhaps misguided and unnecessary, I think the guy was just trying to relate to you. CF is such a random weird thing that most people don't have a damn clue about. So when you say you have it, they try to scrounge up ANY tiny piece of information they may have on it. If it means they mention "I knew someone with it who died," then they'll say it just to have something to say. Most people when they hear cystic fibrosis, if they know anything about it, don't know a damn thing to say. I guarantee he didn't realize he was being what you saw as insensitive.

The other thing... People take cues from you. If you say you have CF, and then say "Hey sh*t happens... at least I wasn't abducted by aliens. And hell, I know I'll never get old or wrinkly!" or something similarly ridiculous (doesn't need to be that childish and stupid, it's just the only thing I thought of right now), they will take the cue from you and relax. Once you tell someone, you really kind of have to lighten the mood a bit. <b>BY ALL MEANS, use the opportunity to educate.</b> And educate 100% truthfully, no need to cover in sugar. But educate in a lighter manner (this is especially if it's someone you don't know well, and you're not sitting down to have a serious conversation about it), and they will lighten up too. Whenever I tell people about it, I answer questions seriously, but I'm sure to throw in some things like "Hey no adult diapers! I won't get that old!" or "Well at least my tattoos won't stretch and wrinkle" etc. They lighten up, feel more free to ask questions, don't feel as awkward, and are less likely to try to search for *anything* they can say, and just allow you to educate them. That's my experience anyway. <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-smile.gif" border="0">
 
6

65rosessamurai

Guest
Touche' Em!

If I couldn't say it any better, myself. Just adding an ice-breaker to thier comment about the only thing they know about it can definitely cut the tension, in order to help in educating them further!
 
6

65rosessamurai

Guest
Touche' Em!

If I couldn't say it any better, myself. Just adding an ice-breaker to thier comment about the only thing they know about it can definitely cut the tension, in order to help in educating them further!
 
6

65rosessamurai

Guest
Touche' Em!

If I couldn't say it any better, myself. Just adding an ice-breaker to thier comment about the only thing they know about it can definitely cut the tension, in order to help in educating them further!
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Top