"Mamma, I am going to die? "

holmfamily1992 · Oct 8, 2008

I posted this on another page. My 10 year old is going for his G-Tube operation on Friday and all of us are a bit scared.
This morning while getting ready for school and I was rounding up socks for the boys, my son, out of no where came to me and asked "mamma, am I going to die?" For the first time in my LIFE I was speechless. I just simply told him "no" but also explained that everone dies at some point. We definately didnt have time to sit down and talk and even if we did, Im not sure what I would have said. He must be thinking more and more about this or he wouldnt have said anything. He is the type of kid that doesnt know how to put his feelings into words. When he was bit by a friends dog in the face we had to seek treatment for him because he was a very angry little boy. All he could think was why is this all happening to him. Then we received the news about CF. So for Dylan these past months have been very hard for him. He hated going to treatments and would cry all the way there. I believe that talking to someone he didnt know about his fears actually hindered his healing. We started doing what she would do at home and pulled him out of it.
But this is different. We share his same fears. Is he scared about surgery? Does he know enough about this disease and does he think he may die young? We need help thats for sure. My heart breaks so much for him and I am sure you guys know exactly what I mean. I am sure he looks at the other siblings with CF and wonders why this isnt happening to them?? We have talked about how this is different for everyone and just because they arent going through it now with him doesnt ever mean they wont. BUT it doesnt mean they will either.
This is way to complex for a child to understand. All he knows is that he is sick. Thats how he puts it. My husband and I plan on talking to him on our long drive down state. Thats about the only time when we cant be interupted.

Has anyone had to go through this with your child and what did you say?? How can I talk to him without becoming blubbering fool??

<img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-sad.gif" border="0"> Tina

holmfamily1992 · Oct 8, 2008

I posted this on another page. My 10 year old is going for his G-Tube operation on Friday and all of us are a bit scared.
This morning while getting ready for school and I was rounding up socks for the boys, my son, out of no where came to me and asked "mamma, am I going to die?" For the first time in my LIFE I was speechless. I just simply told him "no" but also explained that everone dies at some point. We definately didnt have time to sit down and talk and even if we did, Im not sure what I would have said. He must be thinking more and more about this or he wouldnt have said anything. He is the type of kid that doesnt know how to put his feelings into words. When he was bit by a friends dog in the face we had to seek treatment for him because he was a very angry little boy. All he could think was why is this all happening to him. Then we received the news about CF. So for Dylan these past months have been very hard for him. He hated going to treatments and would cry all the way there. I believe that talking to someone he didnt know about his fears actually hindered his healing. We started doing what she would do at home and pulled him out of it.
But this is different. We share his same fears. Is he scared about surgery? Does he know enough about this disease and does he think he may die young? We need help thats for sure. My heart breaks so much for him and I am sure you guys know exactly what I mean. I am sure he looks at the other siblings with CF and wonders why this isnt happening to them?? We have talked about how this is different for everyone and just because they arent going through it now with him doesnt ever mean they wont. BUT it doesnt mean they will either.
This is way to complex for a child to understand. All he knows is that he is sick. Thats how he puts it. My husband and I plan on talking to him on our long drive down state. Thats about the only time when we cant be interupted.

Has anyone had to go through this with your child and what did you say?? How can I talk to him without becoming blubbering fool??

<img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-sad.gif" border="0"> Tina

holmfamily1992 · Oct 8, 2008

I posted this on another page. My 10 year old is going for his G-Tube operation on Friday and all of us are a bit scared.
This morning while getting ready for school and I was rounding up socks for the boys, my son, out of no where came to me and asked "mamma, am I going to die?" For the first time in my LIFE I was speechless. I just simply told him "no" but also explained that everone dies at some point. We definately didnt have time to sit down and talk and even if we did, Im not sure what I would have said. He must be thinking more and more about this or he wouldnt have said anything. He is the type of kid that doesnt know how to put his feelings into words. When he was bit by a friends dog in the face we had to seek treatment for him because he was a very angry little boy. All he could think was why is this all happening to him. Then we received the news about CF. So for Dylan these past months have been very hard for him. He hated going to treatments and would cry all the way there. I believe that talking to someone he didnt know about his fears actually hindered his healing. We started doing what she would do at home and pulled him out of it.
But this is different. We share his same fears. Is he scared about surgery? Does he know enough about this disease and does he think he may die young? We need help thats for sure. My heart breaks so much for him and I am sure you guys know exactly what I mean. I am sure he looks at the other siblings with CF and wonders why this isnt happening to them?? We have talked about how this is different for everyone and just because they arent going through it now with him doesnt ever mean they wont. BUT it doesnt mean they will either.
This is way to complex for a child to understand. All he knows is that he is sick. Thats how he puts it. My husband and I plan on talking to him on our long drive down state. Thats about the only time when we cant be interupted.

Has anyone had to go through this with your child and what did you say?? How can I talk to him without becoming blubbering fool??

<img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-sad.gif" border="0"> Tina

holmfamily1992 · Oct 8, 2008

I posted this on another page. My 10 year old is going for his G-Tube operation on Friday and all of us are a bit scared.
This morning while getting ready for school and I was rounding up socks for the boys, my son, out of no where came to me and asked "mamma, am I going to die?" For the first time in my LIFE I was speechless. I just simply told him "no" but also explained that everone dies at some point. We definately didnt have time to sit down and talk and even if we did, Im not sure what I would have said. He must be thinking more and more about this or he wouldnt have said anything. He is the type of kid that doesnt know how to put his feelings into words. When he was bit by a friends dog in the face we had to seek treatment for him because he was a very angry little boy. All he could think was why is this all happening to him. Then we received the news about CF. So for Dylan these past months have been very hard for him. He hated going to treatments and would cry all the way there. I believe that talking to someone he didnt know about his fears actually hindered his healing. We started doing what she would do at home and pulled him out of it.
But this is different. We share his same fears. Is he scared about surgery? Does he know enough about this disease and does he think he may die young? We need help thats for sure. My heart breaks so much for him and I am sure you guys know exactly what I mean. I am sure he looks at the other siblings with CF and wonders why this isnt happening to them?? We have talked about how this is different for everyone and just because they arent going through it now with him doesnt ever mean they wont. BUT it doesnt mean they will either.
This is way to complex for a child to understand. All he knows is that he is sick. Thats how he puts it. My husband and I plan on talking to him on our long drive down state. Thats about the only time when we cant be interupted.

Has anyone had to go through this with your child and what did you say?? How can I talk to him without becoming blubbering fool??

<img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-sad.gif" border="0"> Tina

holmfamily1992 · Oct 8, 2008

I posted this on another page. My 10 year old is going for his G-Tube operation on Friday and all of us are a bit scared.
 This morning while getting ready for school and I was rounding up socks for the boys, my son, out of no where came to me and asked "mamma, am I going to die?" For the first time in my LIFE I was speechless. I just simply told him "no" but also explained that everone dies at some point. We definately didnt have time to sit down and talk and even if we did, Im not sure what I would have said. He must be thinking more and more about this or he wouldnt have said anything. He is the type of kid that doesnt know how to put his feelings into words. When he was bit by a friends dog in the face we had to seek treatment for him because he was a very angry little boy. All he could think was why is this all happening to him. Then we received the news about CF. So for Dylan these past months have been very hard for him. He hated going to treatments and would cry all the way there. I believe that talking to someone he didnt know about his fears actually hindered his healing. We started doing what she would do at home and pulled him out of it.
 But this is different. We share his same fears. Is he scared about surgery? Does he know enough about this disease and does he think he may die young? We need help thats for sure. My heart breaks so much for him and I am sure you guys know exactly what I mean. I am sure he looks at the other siblings with CF and wonders why this isnt happening to them?? We have talked about how this is different for everyone and just because they arent going through it now with him doesnt ever mean they wont. BUT it doesnt mean they will either.
 This is way to complex for a child to understand. All he knows is that he is sick. Thats how he puts it. My husband and I plan on talking to him on our long drive down state. Thats about the only time when we cant be interupted.
 
 Has anyone had to go through this with your child and what did you say?? How can I talk to him without becoming blubbering fool??
 
 <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-sad.gif" border="0"> Tina

Jane · Oct 8, 2008

"Mamma, I am going to die?

Yes, we've all been through it with our Cf kids. It is heartbreaking.

My advice is be factual about your information but don't elaborate unless he has more questions. You handled it the right way. Use it as a teachable moment. For example, you could point out that even though CF is a serious disease, you are helping him stay as healthy as possible by doing the g-tube.

Its not easy. Does he have a counselor to talk to? It might help him sort through some of his concerns.

Good luck.

Jane · Oct 8, 2008

"Mamma, I am going to die?

Yes, we've all been through it with our Cf kids. It is heartbreaking.

My advice is be factual about your information but don't elaborate unless he has more questions. You handled it the right way. Use it as a teachable moment. For example, you could point out that even though CF is a serious disease, you are helping him stay as healthy as possible by doing the g-tube.

Its not easy. Does he have a counselor to talk to? It might help him sort through some of his concerns.

Good luck.

Jane · Oct 8, 2008

"Mamma, I am going to die?

Yes, we've all been through it with our Cf kids. It is heartbreaking.

My advice is be factual about your information but don't elaborate unless he has more questions. You handled it the right way. Use it as a teachable moment. For example, you could point out that even though CF is a serious disease, you are helping him stay as healthy as possible by doing the g-tube.

Its not easy. Does he have a counselor to talk to? It might help him sort through some of his concerns.

Good luck.

Jane · Oct 8, 2008

"Mamma, I am going to die?

Yes, we've all been through it with our Cf kids. It is heartbreaking.

My advice is be factual about your information but don't elaborate unless he has more questions. You handled it the right way. Use it as a teachable moment. For example, you could point out that even though CF is a serious disease, you are helping him stay as healthy as possible by doing the g-tube.

Its not easy. Does he have a counselor to talk to? It might help him sort through some of his concerns.

Good luck.

Jane · Oct 8, 2008

"Mamma, I am going to die?

Yes, we've all been through it with our Cf kids. It is heartbreaking.
 
 My advice is be factual about your information but don't elaborate unless he has more questions. You handled it the right way. Use it as a teachable moment. For example, you could point out that even though CF is a serious disease, you are helping him stay as healthy as possible by doing the g-tube.
 
 Its not easy. Does he have a counselor to talk to? It might help him sort through some of his concerns.
 
 Good luck.

kathiel · Oct 8, 2008

"Mamma, I am going to die?

I really wish I could help you more.
Samantha went through all of this stuff at an early age (she is fixin' to turn 5 and already has a g-button and port) but she is so medically inclined and knows so much about CF for her age. Even at her age she is "involved" in all of the decisions concerning her care and that helps a lot.
I have read many of the books about CF to Samantha, though she is too young to really understand it she has the idea. The "Kyle" books are great and right at her age level for understanding. I have also read Alex to her and few others.
Hope you find something that helps.

kathiel · Oct 8, 2008

"Mamma, I am going to die?

I really wish I could help you more.
Samantha went through all of this stuff at an early age (she is fixin' to turn 5 and already has a g-button and port) but she is so medically inclined and knows so much about CF for her age. Even at her age she is "involved" in all of the decisions concerning her care and that helps a lot.
I have read many of the books about CF to Samantha, though she is too young to really understand it she has the idea. The "Kyle" books are great and right at her age level for understanding. I have also read Alex to her and few others.
Hope you find something that helps.

kathiel · Oct 8, 2008

"Mamma, I am going to die?

I really wish I could help you more.
Samantha went through all of this stuff at an early age (she is fixin' to turn 5 and already has a g-button and port) but she is so medically inclined and knows so much about CF for her age. Even at her age she is "involved" in all of the decisions concerning her care and that helps a lot.
I have read many of the books about CF to Samantha, though she is too young to really understand it she has the idea. The "Kyle" books are great and right at her age level for understanding. I have also read Alex to her and few others.
Hope you find something that helps.

kathiel · Oct 8, 2008

"Mamma, I am going to die?

I really wish I could help you more.
Samantha went through all of this stuff at an early age (she is fixin' to turn 5 and already has a g-button and port) but she is so medically inclined and knows so much about CF for her age. Even at her age she is "involved" in all of the decisions concerning her care and that helps a lot.
I have read many of the books about CF to Samantha, though she is too young to really understand it she has the idea. The "Kyle" books are great and right at her age level for understanding. I have also read Alex to her and few others.
Hope you find something that helps.

kathiel · Oct 8, 2008

"Mamma, I am going to die?

I really wish I could help you more.
 Samantha went through all of this stuff at an early age (she is fixin' to turn 5 and already has a g-button and port) but she is so medically inclined and knows so much about CF for her age. Even at her age she is "involved" in all of the decisions concerning her care and that helps a lot.
 I have read many of the books about CF to Samantha, though she is too young to really understand it she has the idea. The "Kyle" books are great and right at her age level for understanding. I have also read Alex to her and few others.
 Hope you find something that helps.

JORDYSMOM · Oct 8, 2008

"Mamma, I am going to die?

Oh Tina, I know this is breaking your heart. I know you will find a way to help your son deal with this. My family went through this after Jordan's dx. Of course, I had all of those questions too, and it is very difficult to convince your child that everything will be okay when you aren't exactly sure of that yourself. I wish I had some profound advice to give you. Just let him know that you are all in this together.<img src="i/expressions/heart.gif" border="0">

Stacey

JORDYSMOM · Oct 8, 2008

"Mamma, I am going to die?

Oh Tina, I know this is breaking your heart. I know you will find a way to help your son deal with this. My family went through this after Jordan's dx. Of course, I had all of those questions too, and it is very difficult to convince your child that everything will be okay when you aren't exactly sure of that yourself. I wish I had some profound advice to give you. Just let him know that you are all in this together.<img src="i/expressions/heart.gif" border="0">

Stacey

JORDYSMOM · Oct 8, 2008

"Mamma, I am going to die?

Oh Tina, I know this is breaking your heart. I know you will find a way to help your son deal with this. My family went through this after Jordan's dx. Of course, I had all of those questions too, and it is very difficult to convince your child that everything will be okay when you aren't exactly sure of that yourself. I wish I had some profound advice to give you. Just let him know that you are all in this together.<img src="i/expressions/heart.gif" border="0">

Stacey

JORDYSMOM · Oct 8, 2008

"Mamma, I am going to die?

Oh Tina, I know this is breaking your heart. I know you will find a way to help your son deal with this. My family went through this after Jordan's dx. Of course, I had all of those questions too, and it is very difficult to convince your child that everything will be okay when you aren't exactly sure of that yourself. I wish I had some profound advice to give you. Just let him know that you are all in this together.<img src="i/expressions/heart.gif" border="0">

Stacey

JORDYSMOM · Oct 8, 2008

"Mamma, I am going to die?

Oh Tina, I know this is breaking your heart. I know you will find a way to help your son deal with this. My family went through this after Jordan's dx. Of course, I had all of those questions too, and it is very difficult to convince your child that everything will be okay when you aren't exactly sure of that yourself. I wish I had some profound advice to give you. Just let him know that you are all in this together.<img src="i/expressions/heart.gif" border="0">
 
 Stacey

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