Wow - there are so many things I want to reply to on this thread.
I will start with the original post by ONELOVEx3.
I am going to say this and I don't want to be mean but truly and honestly try to get rid of the mentality that he is a CF sufferer. I know what you mean in some respects, but if you see him as a sufferer it could ultimately affect his attitude which could in turn subconsciously affect his health. I hated when I was in high school people treating me as though I was a decrepid helpless person because I had CF. I wasn't THAT sick at the time - so that may be part of it, but still I was sick enough - in the hospital about 1-2 times a year and sick with other head colds off and on, also I was diagnosed with CF related diabetes.
As for worrying - that is normal. I think it is good to show concern, but I would try to gauge what he needs. If HE is a worrier then I would try not to talk about it too much. I say that because I am a HUGE worrier when it comes to my health and my fiance and I tend to not talk about things unless I bring them up. It helps me to forget about things or not think about them and when I do bring it up he will tell me his concerns, but it is when I AM ready. I hope that makes sense.
I don't see why telling him you had a friend pass from CF would be a bad thing. Pretty much every CFer knows the possibilities of what COULD happen with CF, so it is most likely not going to surprise him. What may surprise him is that you knew someone else with CF though. Alot of people are not aware of CF.
Being Sick - I get bored when I am sick and housebound or hospital bound. I feel like a waste of space cause I can't really do anything and I feel like a burden, like no one would want to hang out with me cause I can't do anything and am strapped to meds. For ME the best thing my family, fiance and friends do for me when I am sick is to just do ANYTHING with me. To come visit with me and be okay with not doing anything but watching a movie or watching TV. Just knowing that regardless of your ability at the time that someone wants to be with you is nice sometimes. Also if he is able to have sweets or treats sometimes those make you feel better too.
In regards to what to do about telling your boyfriend. I would tell him. I COMPLETELY understand not wanting too or being afraid too - I didn't tell my first boyfriend I had CF - EVER - and we were together for almost a year. He knew and I knew that he knew, but I never came out and told him. He told me after we broke up that he would have really appreciated me telling him and that I should consider telling me boyfriends in the future. I will say though he was a jerk - that is one piece of advice I took to heart and I HAVE told each of my boyfriends since. I have had relationships end over CF related issues, but NONE of them ended when I told the guy I had CF and what it was. I typically would tell them within the first few weeks of dating if not before we ever started dating and each relationship lasted a year or more.
It is a hard thing to do, but if you don't feel you can trust him with that information you should reconsider why you are with him in the first place. I say that from experience. I was terrified to be honest with one of my boyfriends about my health because I thought if he found out EVERYTHING he would leave me. I look back at that now and think MAN I should have just told him about EVERYTHING not just that I had CF - it could have saved me a year of dating lol. That lack of trust is not good to have in a relationship.
Well I will shut my mouth now I hope that was helpful to someone.
Happy New Year,
Lindsey
