Poverty Vs. CF

A

anonymous

New member
<blockquote>Quote<br><hr><i>Originally posted by: <b>Q</b></i><br>That said, I don't see how illustrating the truth about CF represents a "bad attitude." If you prefer sugarcoated clichés and truisms, more power to you. They might keep you sane. Others, however, might stay sane by addressing reality as it is rather than as they wish it were or as they heard it ought to be. Why are these people automatically labeled "pessimists" or "complainers"? Their approach might not be everyone's cup of Kool-Aid, but at least it holds up to scrutiny.<hr></blockquote>

Who says YOUR negative attitdue is reality, or that people should only see the gloom in everything? Maybe your the one who is wrong. Did you ever think of that? Maybe you should try to focus on the good and stop trying to make everyone else focus on the bad. Life is what you make it, it's your choice!
 
J

JennifersHope

New member
I just want to know Why can't ppl be free to express feelings of anquish on here without being forced to try to see the positive??? SO what if someone is in a negative crude mood??? Let them be free to express themselves..sometimes that makes all the difference in our day.. being able to vent without being JUDGED. SOMEONES FEELINGS ARE NOT RIGHT OR WRONG THEY ARE JUST FEELINGS....... We don't have to all agree....Most of us spend most of our time telling our loved ones we fine and happy so that they don't worry..Can't there be one place where we can come and be free to express ourselves??.. Like I said I am not in the same place as Winace.. I like my life and have a wonderful support system .I have ppl that I can call day or night that would listen to me but I still feel like I need a place to be able to be completly real with my feelings... and someday when I want to be in a bad mood.. the last thing I wasnt is to be told not to be.....I think what is most important is for us to support each other. Stop trying to change the ppl on here and let them be free to be themselves..... PLEASE... I think that will save many ppl a lot of heartache.. If we all worry about our own attitude we will all be much better off.

Sorry I think I am going Prednisone....but it bothers me.. this nit picky BS..... NOt one of us has the perfect answer for anything..NONE OF US... I know I could stop reading this post but I won't

Jennifer
 
E

Emily65Roses

New member
Yes, sometimes you can make lemonade. And I think most of us do. But let me ask you something... what are you supposed to make when life hands you a bag of crap? Last I checked, there was so such thing as crap-ade.

I know everyone sees WinAce as the moody angry guy, but I think even he tries to see the good side of stuff when it's there. I think we all make the best of a situation when it's POSSIBLE... But you have to admit sometimes it's hard to see the good when you're surrounded by bad. We all have every right to complain about the bad when it pop ups and we feel crappy about it. The point of this place, like Jennifer said, is to come here and complain to people who will understand what we're going through. With these kinds of attitudes, we'd be better off going to our loved ones who have no idea what it's like to have CF, because at least they won't tell us to "make lemonade." When I go to Mike to complain, he doesn't say much, just listens. And when he does open his mouth, it's with something like "I know," not "make the best of the situation."

Keep in mind that most people come here to complain because it's the best place. I don't think many of us run around all day complaining. It just seems that way here because this is the best place to do it, so what we hear on this forum is all the complaints. But that doesn't mean we all (even WinAce!) walk around all day doing NOTHING but b*tching and whining. Most of us do it here so that we CAN live "normal" lives free of excessive complaining. So next time someone complains, instead of giving them some garbage cliche phrase... just tell them how you understand, or if you don't, tell them you're sorry. Or share a story. Or just let them know you're listening. Ask how you can help. Anything like that. It makes no sense to me to tear someone down who's complaining about their CF for whatever reason. If they're whining, it's because stuff SUCKS, and the last thing they need is someone making it worse. Not just anyone making it worse, but people who are SUPPOSED TO UNDERSTAND. Let's not be jackasses, and go back to lending an ear when one of us needs it, hmm?
 
L

Lilith

New member
I agree completely with Jennifer. There's been WAAYYY too much of this lately. You can offer support without the nasty comments or "Well, you should feel this way because your way is bad" crap. WinAce is in a tough position, leave him alone! Until you walk a mile in his shoes, don't judge. You aren't helping, you're being annoying. Lay off and find something else to do with your time. And to the last ANONYMOUS poster, if WinAce's comments are making you focus on the bad, then stop reading them or change your outlook and realize that these are his feelings and his alone. Simple as that.
 
A

anonymous

New member
I used to believe that CF did grant us a specific outlook on life, although since coming to this board I realized this is a fallacy.

When one considers how certain individuals perceive their disease, their lives, and everything else, it becomes quite apparent that Cystic Fibrosis, in itself, does not give us a zestful look on life. How I wish I had been right. =( I mean, if you just go through some of the messages, no one can deny this. It's the truth - even if I wish it wasn't so.

It doesn't mean, however, that people need to try and depress us with what our disease will do to us - or was the point to try and impress us with what you've managed to see and avoid, like some veteran warrior?

And Winace, please don't bullshit us about the affects of our disease. If you're gonna list ailments that we get, please don't make up rubbish about drowing in blood. There is no way you'd live long enough to drown in blood unless you underwent a operation. Your lungs would pack out long before then.

And secondly, please don't try and justify your argument with a Monty Python quote unless you're posting under the teenager section of this website.
 
A

anonymous

New member
<blockquote>Quote<br><hr><i>Originally posted by: <b>JennifersHope</b></i><br>I just want to know Why can't ppl be free to express feelings of anquish on here without being forced to try to see the positive??? SO what if someone is in a negative crude mood??? Let them be free to express themselves..sometimes that makes all the difference in our day.. being able to vent without being JUDGED.


Why can't people try to be optimistic w/o Winace picking their posts apart and trying to force them to be negative and telling them they have their heads in the sand or accusing them of being jerks for disagreeing with his take on life? We all have the same disease here & all will have to see death's door eventually it's just that some of us don't see a reason to dwell on it & constantly be stressing over something we just have no control of.
Hope
 
A

anonymous

New member
Also, I think it highly unlikely anyone goes onto the net to get depressed. They look for health tips and success stories. There is nothing more damaging than feeding worst-of-the worst cases (as Winace loves to do) to someone who needs encouragement.

It also doesn't help to destroy someones religious beliefs (be them true or not) when it's all they have to hold onto.

Or should we all complain, have no friends, and live no life, as some here do?

I think people are just jealous of those who have tried to overcome their disease.

CT
 
E

Emily65Roses

New member
<blockquote>Quote<br><hr><i>Originally posted by: <b>Anonymous</b></i><br>Also, I think it highly unlikely anyone goes onto the net to get depressed. They look for health tips and success stories. CT<hr></blockquote>

AND SUPPORT. What did I *JUST* say? We come here for support. We come here to complain about stuff that other people will understand firsthand, because we can't find people in real life than really get it. I come here to complain when need be, so that I'm good to go most of the rest of the time. I don't come here to get depressed, that's just about the dumbest thing I've ever heard. But it makes sense that we'd come here to have people to relate to. And that's exactly what I said.
 
A

anonymous

New member
Wow. We actually agree on something?

Now, are you trying to tell me that what Winace is in anyway encouraging? In fact, has he ever encouraged anyone with anything, besides hoping that it all ends quickly?

And don't try and tell me that Winace complains 'just' what is sufficient.

Sure, he might provide us with the occassional tip, although it is normally so tear-soaked, phleigm-covered, death-ridden it's hard to find. I'm just saying it's completely unneccasery to be so overly negative sometimes. We've all learnt to hold our tongues occassionally.

CT
 
E

Emily65Roses

New member
I'll just speak for myself here to make sure I cover my bases. I hold my tongue sometimes, yes. But I still have 70% of my lung function. I don't have cepacia. I'm not looking at a transplant. Let alone a transplant he may not even get because insurance companies are a bunch of uncaring leeches. Really, until you know what it's like to be WinAce, you can't say you'd hold your tongue too. You might hope you would, but you don't <i>know</i>. He is on the more negative side (at least what we see here, like I said before, he could very possibly be a whole different person in his real life, with his girlfriend, etc), but it's not like he doesn't have reason. Maybe he does complain a lot, but at least he's complaining about real problems. That's a lot more called for than people who complain about really stupid petty shallow garbage (and don't pretend like you've never met one of those... we ALL have). I just refuse to judge him for complaining until (if) I know what it's like to be where he is. Because I can't say for sure that I wouldn't feel *exactly* the same.
 
A

anonymous

New member
Hehe, is it a problem that we keep agreeing on stuff, but just can't get around the details? =P

Sure, I'm also not as bad as Winace - although I'm not great either. I've got a sub 30% function, but you will never hear me complaining. And also, how are we suppose to judge him according to what he might be? What we see here is what we have to work with. If he wants to show us that side of his personality, then he has to be hold accountable for it.

I just remember what it's like finding out the first time what the disease is about - and having people throwing stuff in my face that is so overly negative I was ready to just swim out into the sea as far as I could and not come back.

It's fine to rant about how terrible the disease is - in fact, i believe it can be a very healthy thing to do. But for god's sake, choose your time and place. It's not neccasery to do it on a post when someone is depressed and seeking encouragement. It's not neccasery to voice your angers with god to someone who's holding him/herself together with the prospect of a better 'life' in heaven.

If anyone does otherwise, they deserve all negative posts coming to them. It has the potential to kill someone - and i mean that in all honesty.
 
A

anonymous

New member
<blockquote>Quote<br><hr><i>Originally posted by: <b>Anonymous</b></i><br><blockquote>Quote
<hr><i>Originally posted by: <b>Q</b></i>
That said, I don't see how illustrating the truth about CF represents a "bad attitude." If you prefer sugarcoated clichés and truisms, more power to you. They might keep you sane. Others, however, might stay sane by addressing reality as it is rather than as they wish it were or as they heard it ought to be. Why are these people automatically labeled "pessimists" or "complainers"? Their approach might not be everyone's cup of Kool-Aid, but at least it holds up to scrutiny.<hr></blockquote>



Who says YOUR negative attitdue is reality, or that people should only see the gloom in everything? Maybe your the one who is wrong. Did you ever think of that? Maybe you should try to focus on the good and stop trying to make everyone else focus on the bad. Life is what you make it, it's your choice!<hr></blockquote>

Er, would you please pay attention to what I wrote before you criticize it? I never told anyone what they "should" see or urged them to "focus on the bad." In fact, if you read the whole post, I said that it's perfectly understandable that some people prefer not to bother themselves with the worse aspects of CF. Whatever works for you. And yes, part of life <i>is</i> "what you make it." But part of it is also plain reality -- assuming you believe there is such a thing. Some people is prefering fact to fantasy. That's what works for <i>them</i>. Why does it bug you so much, secure as you are in your own world-view? Don't realists deserve "support"?

Q
 
A

anonymous

New member
I don't see how trying to achieve everything you can is conflicting with realism.

i'm still very proud of what I've done with my life.

The anon poster was merely stating that you should try and do what you can under your circumstances. Play your hand well.

As for realism holding up under scrutiny - sure. But exagerated symptoms about drowning in blood is as equally unrealistic as saying CF is naught but a little cough every now and then.

Personally, I believe blissful optimism is far better than cold depression, although I guess they could be considered equally wrong. It's just a matter of finding the balance.

And I still think certain things should only be said when its appropriate, dammit. If someone has said they will go to heaven or whatever, which makes life worth it, it's not neccasery to flame god - even if what they say completely and utterly contradicts the very basis of your views.

CT
 
L

Lilith

New member
<blockquote>Quote
<hr><i>Originally posted by: <b>Anonymous</b></i>
It's fine to rant about how terrible the disease is - in fact, i believe it can be a very healthy thing to do. But for god's sake, choose your time and place. It's not neccasery to do it on a post when someone is depressed and seeking encouragement. It's not neccasery to voice your angers with god to someone who's holding him/herself together with the prospect of a better 'life' in heaven. If anyone does otherwise, they deserve all negative posts coming to them. It has the potential to kill someone - and i mean that in all honesty.<hr></blockquote>

OMG...gimme a break! Are you saying that just because someone reads a negative post that they're going to go kill themselves?! If they do, then there are underlying issues that they haven't obviously addressed if they are that weak. And besides that, you want to complain about negativity? Watch the news sometimes. I'd say hearing a story about a father who killed his wife and unborn baby by drowing and the fetus floated to the surface after the mother's body bloated is FAR WORSE than hearing WinAce complain about the miserable aspects of CF. I'd rather read his posts than watch that crap. People die horrible deaths every day of which the complications can be just as bad or worse than CF. WinAce may go over the top *sometimes*, but if you want to complain about negativity in general, you'd have to complain about 75% of the world. I wish you luck with that.
 
A

anonymous

New member
Well in that case, I best get moving eh? 75% is gonna take me a long time...

Come on though, seriously. Try and think logically.

Is it clever to say how bad the disease is when someone is looking for encouragement? Which by the way, already testifys to there being problems in the persons life....

...Or to say god doesn't exist when someone is saying how God is the only thing that keeps them living...?

Or am I the only one who thinks this is stupidity on a retard level?
 
A

anonymous

New member
Well in that case, I best get moving eh? 75% is gonna take me a long time...

Come on though, seriously. Try and think logically.

Is it clever to say how bad the disease is when someone is looking for encouragement? Which by the way, already testifys to there being problems in the persons life....

...Or to say god doesn't exist when someone is saying how God is the only thing that keeps them living...?

Or am I the only one who thinks this is stupidity on a retard level?

CT
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Top