Jason is getting to an age where he is going over friends houses more often to play. He has had about 6 different friends houses so far where we haven't had the issue we recently ran into. He went over to play and when I picked him up I saw the father smoking. Jason didn't smell smokey and luckily they played outside a lot. My question is how have each of you handled these types of situations. It is not like we know the parents very well. My gut says to allow him to play over there on nice days where they are most likely to be outside most of the time. Otherwise, they should play here. I can always explain his health situation to the parents so that they know why this is how we feel. Please let me know your experiences. Oh and I found out that the mother smokes also. I will def. refrain from having him in the car with his parents. Thanks!
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son's friend's parents smoke
- Thread starter JoAnn
- Start date
Jason is getting to an age where he is going over friends houses more often to play. He has had about 6 different friends houses so far where we haven't had the issue we recently ran into. He went over to play and when I picked him up I saw the father smoking. Jason didn't smell smokey and luckily they played outside a lot. My question is how have each of you handled these types of situations. It is not like we know the parents very well. My gut says to allow him to play over there on nice days where they are most likely to be outside most of the time. Otherwise, they should play here. I can always explain his health situation to the parents so that they know why this is how we feel. Please let me know your experiences. Oh and I found out that the mother smokes also. I will def. refrain from having him in the car with his parents. Thanks!
Why not talk to the parents?
Most parents I know will not smoke in the house when a child's friend has asthma even.
As long as they know.....
And maybe they don't smoke in the house or the car.
Lots of people that I know that still smoke don't smoke in those places any more.
Most parents I know will not smoke in the house when a child's friend has asthma even.
As long as they know.....
And maybe they don't smoke in the house or the car.
Lots of people that I know that still smoke don't smoke in those places any more.
Why not talk to the parents?
Most parents I know will not smoke in the house when a child's friend has asthma even.
As long as they know.....
And maybe they don't smoke in the house or the car.
Lots of people that I know that still smoke don't smoke in those places any more.
Most parents I know will not smoke in the house when a child's friend has asthma even.
As long as they know.....
And maybe they don't smoke in the house or the car.
Lots of people that I know that still smoke don't smoke in those places any more.
Emily65Roses
New member
I say just tell them. Most decent people won't smoke inside if they know a kid's over who has a serious problem with it. A lot of parents these days won't even smoke inside if they have a healthy kid, because it still sucks. I would just sit them down and explain CF to them. As it is, if he's playing over there, they should know anyway in case something happens, so they don't freak out if it's not necessary, or so they can get the help required if it <b>is</b> necessary.
Emily65Roses
New member
I say just tell them. Most decent people won't smoke inside if they know a kid's over who has a serious problem with it. A lot of parents these days won't even smoke inside if they have a healthy kid, because it still sucks. I would just sit them down and explain CF to them. As it is, if he's playing over there, they should know anyway in case something happens, so they don't freak out if it's not necessary, or so they can get the help required if it <b>is</b> necessary.
PoolShooter24
New member
I'd talk to them....My parents ran into this and they talked to the parents and they all understood....Also tho my mom smokes...so im kinda use to it
PoolShooter24
New member
I'd talk to them....My parents ran into this and they talked to the parents and they all understood....Also tho my mom smokes...so im kinda use to it
We don't have a problem currently with friends parents who smoke, but we've had a couple situations at graduation and retirement parties where people just light up in front of everyone and because we're not used to being around smokers, or if we are they've always smoked outside, that it's a bit shocking.
I'd talk to the parents and just let them be aware of the situation. Last summer a relative was smoking outside, not realizing his smoke was blowing into the house. It was just a matter of asking him to move over a little bit and things were fine.
I'd talk to the parents and just let them be aware of the situation. Last summer a relative was smoking outside, not realizing his smoke was blowing into the house. It was just a matter of asking him to move over a little bit and things were fine.
We don't have a problem currently with friends parents who smoke, but we've had a couple situations at graduation and retirement parties where people just light up in front of everyone and because we're not used to being around smokers, or if we are they've always smoked outside, that it's a bit shocking.
I'd talk to the parents and just let them be aware of the situation. Last summer a relative was smoking outside, not realizing his smoke was blowing into the house. It was just a matter of asking him to move over a little bit and things were fine.
I'd talk to the parents and just let them be aware of the situation. Last summer a relative was smoking outside, not realizing his smoke was blowing into the house. It was just a matter of asking him to move over a little bit and things were fine.
Mockingbird
New member
As far as the people saying most parents won't smoke around the kid; that isn't what happens in my experience. I'm sure Jason looks just like a normal kid, and unfortunately the parents will forget he can't be around ciggarette smoke, or they'll just think you're being overprotective and ignore you. I only had two friends with parents that smoked when I was a kid. They all knew I had CF, but after about a month they were smoking around me. Since I was so young and stupid =-) I didn't bother to tell my parents and it was a while before they found out.
It may be best to tell Jason that house is strictly off-limits; if the friend wants to play he has to come to your house. That's what my parents did once theyy found out, and there weren't any major problems with it.
It may be best to tell Jason that house is strictly off-limits; if the friend wants to play he has to come to your house. That's what my parents did once theyy found out, and there weren't any major problems with it.
Mockingbird
New member
As far as the people saying most parents won't smoke around the kid; that isn't what happens in my experience. I'm sure Jason looks just like a normal kid, and unfortunately the parents will forget he can't be around ciggarette smoke, or they'll just think you're being overprotective and ignore you. I only had two friends with parents that smoked when I was a kid. They all knew I had CF, but after about a month they were smoking around me. Since I was so young and stupid =-) I didn't bother to tell my parents and it was a while before they found out.
It may be best to tell Jason that house is strictly off-limits; if the friend wants to play he has to come to your house. That's what my parents did once theyy found out, and there weren't any major problems with it.
It may be best to tell Jason that house is strictly off-limits; if the friend wants to play he has to come to your house. That's what my parents did once theyy found out, and there weren't any major problems with it.
I agree with Mockingbird. I'd certainly talk to the parents, see how receptive they are, etc. But, I would still severely limit any time spent at those households. Even if they're not smoking around your child, the smoke is still in the house. Most non-smokers who walk in the house of a smoker can immediately tell. Same with cars, and many of the items that come from smokers homes. I've been given brand new toys for my children from smokers and the toys, despite being brand new, reek of smoke. It's not worth the risk, in my opinion. I don't think the occasional outside play date on a nice day with a little time spent inside will hurt if he's well, but any thing more than occasional is just not worth the risk.
I agree with Mockingbird. I'd certainly talk to the parents, see how receptive they are, etc. But, I would still severely limit any time spent at those households. Even if they're not smoking around your child, the smoke is still in the house. Most non-smokers who walk in the house of a smoker can immediately tell. Same with cars, and many of the items that come from smokers homes. I've been given brand new toys for my children from smokers and the toys, despite being brand new, reek of smoke. It's not worth the risk, in my opinion. I don't think the occasional outside play date on a nice day with a little time spent inside will hurt if he's well, but any thing more than occasional is just not worth the risk.
thelizardqueen
New member
I'm kind of laughing at this topic (laughing at myself really). I have no advice when it comes to friends parents who smoke, etc. Growing up, all of my friends family smoked, and I was always around smoke. One of my ex's family used to smoke all the time, and I lived with him for about 6 months. My mum even smoked when I was younger too. I guess I was lucky in that it doesn't overally bother me too much. All I can say, is talk to the parents about your childs condition. More then not, I'm sure they will understand.
thelizardqueen
New member
I'm kind of laughing at this topic (laughing at myself really). I have no advice when it comes to friends parents who smoke, etc. Growing up, all of my friends family smoked, and I was always around smoke. One of my ex's family used to smoke all the time, and I lived with him for about 6 months. My mum even smoked when I was younger too. I guess I was lucky in that it doesn't overally bother me too much. All I can say, is talk to the parents about your childs condition. More then not, I'm sure they will understand.
T
TonyaH
Guest
I agree with Annon who said that regardless of wether or not the family smokes in the house during Jason's visit the smoke is still in the house, on the curtains, in the furniture...My son was invited to a birthday party last year and I knew the family smoked. We graciously declined the invitation and sent a gift. I would also have no problem telling a friend's parents that playdates at our house were welcomed, but that you are a non-smoking family. In my oppinion CF should have nothing to do with the fact that you choose not to be around cigarette smoke. It's just a smart health choice. CF just gives us a good excuse to keep our kids away from it and not sound too overprotective. But then again, why do we need excuses to make good decisions for our own children? Anyway, good topic! Thanks for bringing it up!
T
TonyaH
Guest
I agree with Annon who said that regardless of wether or not the family smokes in the house during Jason's visit the smoke is still in the house, on the curtains, in the furniture...My son was invited to a birthday party last year and I knew the family smoked. We graciously declined the invitation and sent a gift. I would also have no problem telling a friend's parents that playdates at our house were welcomed, but that you are a non-smoking family. In my oppinion CF should have nothing to do with the fact that you choose not to be around cigarette smoke. It's just a smart health choice. CF just gives us a good excuse to keep our kids away from it and not sound too overprotective. But then again, why do we need excuses to make good decisions for our own children? Anyway, good topic! Thanks for bringing it up!