The subject of Love.

[Lance2020x]

I think sakasuka is right, if I want discussions I need to just start creating them.<br><br>
So I have a... I don't know if I would call it a question, more of a curious perturbation.<br>-<br>I have found in the past years, going from relationship to relationship, that I seem to fall in and out of love quite easily. When I fall in love, I seem to fall fast and hard, and I stay there until the girl decides she's had enough of me, then once the relationship is over, though it does hurt etc. I seem to recover quite fast. <br>I've not had problems with commitment, I've never cheated, or even THOUGHT about cheating. Honestly people who cheat just astound me... I don't understand how someone could do it.
<br>
When I first told my current girlfriend that I loved her, I meant it fully, and I don't doubt that, but she wasn't ready because she was worried that, since I had 'loved before' more than once, she felt like me saying "I love you" wasn't as special, she wanted to be sure I meant it for real. But I knew that I meant it.<br>Also when I'm in a relationship I want so badly to make the other person happy that I will go to just about any length to let them know I care for them. Sometimes to the point where I mistake regular human emotions for discomfort, and I practically try to change them by innocently wanting to make them happy.
<br>
<br><b>So here is my discussion:</b> <br>
I'm trying to figure out if there is nothing abnormal about this, just a normal human emotional attatchment issue where I believe I've fallen in love the instant I decide to commit due to past family problems and childhood blah blah blah(woe is me?). <br>
OR, is it something more? Do CF patients have a more 'enlightened' sense of feeling and emotion due to an abounding experience with life, beyond what the normal person experiences? Do we CFers have more control over our emotions to heal from pain and rejection, due to the fears and trials we have overcome mentally and emotionally? Can we read into peoples psyche more than the average person do to our own psychological journey and our trial gained abundance of wisdom? Do we stay true to commitment and trust more than the average person?<br><br>

I know that there are a lot of married CFers here, and a lot of people who were/are married to CFers. I would love to hear your oppinions on the subject. What kind of lovers are you/ they (not in the sexual sense. In the emotional, attatched, loving, giving, etc.)?<br>
<b>To those who Have CF:</b> In what way(s) do you think CF has affected your love for your spouse/significant other? How do you differ (in your love, emotionally) from a person without CF?<br>
<b>To those WITHOUT CF:</b> In what way(s) does your spouse/significant other differ from a person without CF? Do they have more appreciation for love? Do they have more zest and heart? What makes them special?<br><br>
Any oppinions on this subject?

 

[Lance2020x]

I think sakasuka is right, if I want discussions I need to just start creating them.<br><br>
So I have a... I don't know if I would call it a question, more of a curious perturbation.<br>-<br>I have found in the past years, going from relationship to relationship, that I seem to fall in and out of love quite easily. When I fall in love, I seem to fall fast and hard, and I stay there until the girl decides she's had enough of me, then once the relationship is over, though it does hurt etc. I seem to recover quite fast. <br>I've not had problems with commitment, I've never cheated, or even THOUGHT about cheating. Honestly people who cheat just astound me... I don't understand how someone could do it.
<br>
When I first told my current girlfriend that I loved her, I meant it fully, and I don't doubt that, but she wasn't ready because she was worried that, since I had 'loved before' more than once, she felt like me saying "I love you" wasn't as special, she wanted to be sure I meant it for real. But I knew that I meant it.<br>Also when I'm in a relationship I want so badly to make the other person happy that I will go to just about any length to let them know I care for them. Sometimes to the point where I mistake regular human emotions for discomfort, and I practically try to change them by innocently wanting to make them happy.
<br>
<br><b>So here is my discussion:</b> <br>
I'm trying to figure out if there is nothing abnormal about this, just a normal human emotional attatchment issue where I believe I've fallen in love the instant I decide to commit due to past family problems and childhood blah blah blah(woe is me?). <br>
OR, is it something more? Do CF patients have a more 'enlightened' sense of feeling and emotion due to an abounding experience with life, beyond what the normal person experiences? Do we CFers have more control over our emotions to heal from pain and rejection, due to the fears and trials we have overcome mentally and emotionally? Can we read into peoples psyche more than the average person do to our own psychological journey and our trial gained abundance of wisdom? Do we stay true to commitment and trust more than the average person?<br><br>

I know that there are a lot of married CFers here, and a lot of people who were/are married to CFers. I would love to hear your oppinions on the subject. What kind of lovers are you/ they (not in the sexual sense. In the emotional, attatched, loving, giving, etc.)?<br>
<b>To those who Have CF:</b> In what way(s) do you think CF has affected your love for your spouse/significant other? How do you differ (in your love, emotionally) from a person without CF?<br>
<b>To those WITHOUT CF:</b> In what way(s) does your spouse/significant other differ from a person without CF? Do they have more appreciation for love? Do they have more zest and heart? What makes them special?<br><br>
Any oppinions on this subject?

 

[Lance2020x]

I think sakasuka is right, if I want discussions I need to just start creating them.<br><br>
So I have a... I don't know if I would call it a question, more of a curious perturbation.<br>-<br>I have found in the past years, going from relationship to relationship, that I seem to fall in and out of love quite easily. When I fall in love, I seem to fall fast and hard, and I stay there until the girl decides she's had enough of me, then once the relationship is over, though it does hurt etc. I seem to recover quite fast. <br>I've not had problems with commitment, I've never cheated, or even THOUGHT about cheating. Honestly people who cheat just astound me... I don't understand how someone could do it.
<br>
When I first told my current girlfriend that I loved her, I meant it fully, and I don't doubt that, but she wasn't ready because she was worried that, since I had 'loved before' more than once, she felt like me saying "I love you" wasn't as special, she wanted to be sure I meant it for real. But I knew that I meant it.<br>Also when I'm in a relationship I want so badly to make the other person happy that I will go to just about any length to let them know I care for them. Sometimes to the point where I mistake regular human emotions for discomfort, and I practically try to change them by innocently wanting to make them happy.
<br>
<br><b>So here is my discussion:</b> <br>
I'm trying to figure out if there is nothing abnormal about this, just a normal human emotional attatchment issue where I believe I've fallen in love the instant I decide to commit due to past family problems and childhood blah blah blah(woe is me?). <br>
OR, is it something more? Do CF patients have a more 'enlightened' sense of feeling and emotion due to an abounding experience with life, beyond what the normal person experiences? Do we CFers have more control over our emotions to heal from pain and rejection, due to the fears and trials we have overcome mentally and emotionally? Can we read into peoples psyche more than the average person do to our own psychological journey and our trial gained abundance of wisdom? Do we stay true to commitment and trust more than the average person?<br><br>

I know that there are a lot of married CFers here, and a lot of people who were/are married to CFers. I would love to hear your oppinions on the subject. What kind of lovers are you/ they (not in the sexual sense. In the emotional, attatched, loving, giving, etc.)?<br>
<b>To those who Have CF:</b> In what way(s) do you think CF has affected your love for your spouse/significant other? How do you differ (in your love, emotionally) from a person without CF?<br>
<b>To those WITHOUT CF:</b> In what way(s) does your spouse/significant other differ from a person without CF? Do they have more appreciation for love? Do they have more zest and heart? What makes them special?<br><br>
Any oppinions on this subject?

 

[dbtoo]

Normal - What is normal?

Here's my two cents on your question
<div class="FTQUOTE"><begin quote>Do CF patients have a more 'enlightened' sense of feeling and emotion due to an abounding experience with life, beyond what the normal person experiences? </end quote></div>

IMHO - [Those who have shallow or closed minds, skip this entry, go on to the next. Atheists and Agnostics - you won't be able to empathize with some of the religious correlations.]

The emotions and feelings we show are defined by the people that we are, they are derived from our life experiences, passed on to us by our parents, and determined by our choices.

I believe that our (those with CF) emotions and feelings have to do with what I will term 'living with the knowledge of death' (as opposed to 'dieing with the knowledge of life'. )

Living with the knowledge of death - when we are diagnosed with CF, we are given the information that there is a life expectancy (see other threads on that topic). We are told to expect death. We were thrown into an existence of pokes, pricks, and pills. We take in the experiences around us of others who suffer with injuries and illness. It tempers our emotions and affects our feelings. It makes us more aware of the life we are living, more grateful for the experiences we have, more caring to the pain that people feel, as we are feeling it ourselves. There is a reference in the old testament that the savior was to be a person who "is a man of sorrows and acquainted with grief." He would be 'wounded' and 'bruised', yet he would personify God's love. These experiences generate a deep inner awareness which is demonstrated by an overwhelming response of love and caring. Those who are the partners (parents, spouses, etc.) to people with CF experience this with us, they would even have "no greater love, then to lay down their life" for us. They would give us a lung if they could.

Basically, as I see it, those who aren't directly in contact with pain and suffering, have a tendency to be unable to empathize as deeply as those who have to experience it. There is also a natural fear of death. Someone may be unable to commit to a relationship when they know that your life may be shorter than theirs and they fear the pain that they may have at your passing. Typically, people expect life. Death is something that will happen, one day, way off in the future.

Dieing with the knowledge of life - This is a harder concept to describe. I correlate this to an Adult who has just been told they have a terminal illness. They have lived their life and are now to die, it is hard to accept. The fear of death will typically override the hope of life. When I was young, I was told I was going to die, what made a difference is how I chose to live with that knowledge.

It is much harder for people who are 'dieing with the knowledge of life', than it is for people who are 'living with the knowledge of death'.

I will die, someday, but for now, I'll just live with that knowledge. <img src="i/expressions/beer.gif" border="0">

p.s. does this mean you are 'single' again? 'Cause I have a beautiful 20 year old daughter you should meet.

 

[dbtoo]

Normal - What is normal?

Here's my two cents on your question
<div class="FTQUOTE"><begin quote>Do CF patients have a more 'enlightened' sense of feeling and emotion due to an abounding experience with life, beyond what the normal person experiences? </end quote></div>

IMHO - [Those who have shallow or closed minds, skip this entry, go on to the next. Atheists and Agnostics - you won't be able to empathize with some of the religious correlations.]

The emotions and feelings we show are defined by the people that we are, they are derived from our life experiences, passed on to us by our parents, and determined by our choices.

I believe that our (those with CF) emotions and feelings have to do with what I will term 'living with the knowledge of death' (as opposed to 'dieing with the knowledge of life'. )

Living with the knowledge of death - when we are diagnosed with CF, we are given the information that there is a life expectancy (see other threads on that topic). We are told to expect death. We were thrown into an existence of pokes, pricks, and pills. We take in the experiences around us of others who suffer with injuries and illness. It tempers our emotions and affects our feelings. It makes us more aware of the life we are living, more grateful for the experiences we have, more caring to the pain that people feel, as we are feeling it ourselves. There is a reference in the old testament that the savior was to be a person who "is a man of sorrows and acquainted with grief." He would be 'wounded' and 'bruised', yet he would personify God's love. These experiences generate a deep inner awareness which is demonstrated by an overwhelming response of love and caring. Those who are the partners (parents, spouses, etc.) to people with CF experience this with us, they would even have "no greater love, then to lay down their life" for us. They would give us a lung if they could.

Basically, as I see it, those who aren't directly in contact with pain and suffering, have a tendency to be unable to empathize as deeply as those who have to experience it. There is also a natural fear of death. Someone may be unable to commit to a relationship when they know that your life may be shorter than theirs and they fear the pain that they may have at your passing. Typically, people expect life. Death is something that will happen, one day, way off in the future.

Dieing with the knowledge of life - This is a harder concept to describe. I correlate this to an Adult who has just been told they have a terminal illness. They have lived their life and are now to die, it is hard to accept. The fear of death will typically override the hope of life. When I was young, I was told I was going to die, what made a difference is how I chose to live with that knowledge.

It is much harder for people who are 'dieing with the knowledge of life', than it is for people who are 'living with the knowledge of death'.

I will die, someday, but for now, I'll just live with that knowledge. <img src="i/expressions/beer.gif" border="0">

p.s. does this mean you are 'single' again? 'Cause I have a beautiful 20 year old daughter you should meet.

 

[dbtoo]

Normal - What is normal?

Here's my two cents on your question
<div class="FTQUOTE"><begin quote>Do CF patients have a more 'enlightened' sense of feeling and emotion due to an abounding experience with life, beyond what the normal person experiences? </end quote></div>

IMHO - [Those who have shallow or closed minds, skip this entry, go on to the next. Atheists and Agnostics - you won't be able to empathize with some of the religious correlations.]

The emotions and feelings we show are defined by the people that we are, they are derived from our life experiences, passed on to us by our parents, and determined by our choices.

I believe that our (those with CF) emotions and feelings have to do with what I will term 'living with the knowledge of death' (as opposed to 'dieing with the knowledge of life'. )

Living with the knowledge of death - when we are diagnosed with CF, we are given the information that there is a life expectancy (see other threads on that topic). We are told to expect death. We were thrown into an existence of pokes, pricks, and pills. We take in the experiences around us of others who suffer with injuries and illness. It tempers our emotions and affects our feelings. It makes us more aware of the life we are living, more grateful for the experiences we have, more caring to the pain that people feel, as we are feeling it ourselves. There is a reference in the old testament that the savior was to be a person who "is a man of sorrows and acquainted with grief." He would be 'wounded' and 'bruised', yet he would personify God's love. These experiences generate a deep inner awareness which is demonstrated by an overwhelming response of love and caring. Those who are the partners (parents, spouses, etc.) to people with CF experience this with us, they would even have "no greater love, then to lay down their life" for us. They would give us a lung if they could.

Basically, as I see it, those who aren't directly in contact with pain and suffering, have a tendency to be unable to empathize as deeply as those who have to experience it. There is also a natural fear of death. Someone may be unable to commit to a relationship when they know that your life may be shorter than theirs and they fear the pain that they may have at your passing. Typically, people expect life. Death is something that will happen, one day, way off in the future.

Dieing with the knowledge of life - This is a harder concept to describe. I correlate this to an Adult who has just been told they have a terminal illness. They have lived their life and are now to die, it is hard to accept. The fear of death will typically override the hope of life. When I was young, I was told I was going to die, what made a difference is how I chose to live with that knowledge.

It is much harder for people who are 'dieing with the knowledge of life', than it is for people who are 'living with the knowledge of death'.

I will die, someday, but for now, I'll just live with that knowledge. <img src="i/expressions/beer.gif" border="0">

p.s. does this mean you are 'single' again? 'Cause I have a beautiful 20 year old daughter you should meet.

 

[Dreamer]

Personally, I think that some of my commitment problems can be attributed to CF. As mentioned by dbtoo, I do think that people are shaped by every single experience in their lives.

Sometimes, I think it's easier to move in and out of relationships as a CFer. Maybe thinking that my life could be short-lived or that it may not be smart to have children has impacted my way of thinking. There's something about having CF that makes me feel that things that are "temporary" are okay.

Also, to piggyback on what dbtoo said, I do think that going through so much brings an entire layer to life that most people may not ever experience. Having CF makes me think more about things than the typical person. It also makes me grateful for the opportunities I have, knowing that they will not be around forever.

I have a difficult time letting people too close to me because I am afraid of hurting people. I always told my parents that I wouldn't get married because I didn't want to hurt anybody when I die. My dad always told me that if somebody loved me, they would want to spend as much time with me as possible while they could.

I do think that I would have probably had an entirely different "love life" if I hadn't had CF. I don't mean that in a good or bad way, but just a factual way.

Interesting topic; thanks for inspiring me to think about things!

 

[Dreamer]

Personally, I think that some of my commitment problems can be attributed to CF. As mentioned by dbtoo, I do think that people are shaped by every single experience in their lives.

Sometimes, I think it's easier to move in and out of relationships as a CFer. Maybe thinking that my life could be short-lived or that it may not be smart to have children has impacted my way of thinking. There's something about having CF that makes me feel that things that are "temporary" are okay.

Also, to piggyback on what dbtoo said, I do think that going through so much brings an entire layer to life that most people may not ever experience. Having CF makes me think more about things than the typical person. It also makes me grateful for the opportunities I have, knowing that they will not be around forever.

I have a difficult time letting people too close to me because I am afraid of hurting people. I always told my parents that I wouldn't get married because I didn't want to hurt anybody when I die. My dad always told me that if somebody loved me, they would want to spend as much time with me as possible while they could.

I do think that I would have probably had an entirely different "love life" if I hadn't had CF. I don't mean that in a good or bad way, but just a factual way.

Interesting topic; thanks for inspiring me to think about things!

 

[Dreamer]

Personally, I think that some of my commitment problems can be attributed to CF. As mentioned by dbtoo, I do think that people are shaped by every single experience in their lives.

Sometimes, I think it's easier to move in and out of relationships as a CFer. Maybe thinking that my life could be short-lived or that it may not be smart to have children has impacted my way of thinking. There's something about having CF that makes me feel that things that are "temporary" are okay.

Also, to piggyback on what dbtoo said, I do think that going through so much brings an entire layer to life that most people may not ever experience. Having CF makes me think more about things than the typical person. It also makes me grateful for the opportunities I have, knowing that they will not be around forever.

I have a difficult time letting people too close to me because I am afraid of hurting people. I always told my parents that I wouldn't get married because I didn't want to hurt anybody when I die. My dad always told me that if somebody loved me, they would want to spend as much time with me as possible while they could.

I do think that I would have probably had an entirely different "love life" if I hadn't had CF. I don't mean that in a good or bad way, but just a factual way.

Interesting topic; thanks for inspiring me to think about things!

 

[Allie]

I don't know how much of Ry's heart was Ry himself, and how much was because of his Cf. I know when he was younger (and stupider) he slept around a bit because he felt like he had something to prove, having CF, and our culture in the US not being kind to guys that are thinner and shorter. But he grew the hell out of that, thank God. but honestly, that's the only part of the way he loved that I would call Cf related.

He had a huge heart, and was deeply loyal and loving of people that were close to him. He teased people he loved, that was how you knew he liked you. He did love fiercely, but I don't believe he fell out of love easily. When we broke up for a little bit about 6 months after we started dating (his fault, even he would admit to that), he camped out literally on my porch for a while until I agreed to take him back. Crazy kid, but an amazingly sweet one as well. I don't think Cfers have an enlightened sense of love and feeling, I think individual people do. I've met Cfers who were lovers, loyal and romantic. Then I've met some who weren't. It's a mixed bag, I think, like most personality traits. I think MAYBE one thing I've noticed is CFers tend to keep emotional distance until they're sure that someone is okay with and understands the whole CF thing.

There were so many things that made Ry special, and yes, he did have a zest for life, an easy smile and a lot of heart. But I think that 90% of his personality was just who he was. I think if he didn't have CF, he would have been similar to the guy I fell in love with and married. Maybe not as fantastically satrcastic and morbid, and I'd have missed that ability to make a joke out of anything, but I think I still would have fallen in love with him. But maybe I'm wrong.

I think one way we differed from 'healthy' couples, was that we could talk about anything. Death, sickness, politics, price of gas. We had an openness about our fears and dreams and thoughts that I don't see often in healthy couples. But to be fair, I don't see it in all Cf relationships either, so again, that might have just been us. I do think Cf forced us to talk about such issues, but I'm glad it did, because I think it helped make us as close as we were. The tin soldier and the ballerina being melted together in the fire and all that. But I might be tempted to agree with what Dreamer said....Ry said for a long time he didn't want to ask me to marry him because he didn't want to 'tie me to him'. Obviously, he changed his mind.

So I know I'm rambling, but I'm roundabout trying to answer your question. I think there may be factors affected by CF, but I think your core personality is more defined by how you are raised, and just who you are. I don't know if that's right, or I just want to imagine that Ry was a sweet guy outside of his CF, but I wanted to try and answer this question. Thanks for posting it, it was pretty interesting!

 

[Allie]

I don't know how much of Ry's heart was Ry himself, and how much was because of his Cf. I know when he was younger (and stupider) he slept around a bit because he felt like he had something to prove, having CF, and our culture in the US not being kind to guys that are thinner and shorter. But he grew the hell out of that, thank God. but honestly, that's the only part of the way he loved that I would call Cf related.

He had a huge heart, and was deeply loyal and loving of people that were close to him. He teased people he loved, that was how you knew he liked you. He did love fiercely, but I don't believe he fell out of love easily. When we broke up for a little bit about 6 months after we started dating (his fault, even he would admit to that), he camped out literally on my porch for a while until I agreed to take him back. Crazy kid, but an amazingly sweet one as well. I don't think Cfers have an enlightened sense of love and feeling, I think individual people do. I've met Cfers who were lovers, loyal and romantic. Then I've met some who weren't. It's a mixed bag, I think, like most personality traits. I think MAYBE one thing I've noticed is CFers tend to keep emotional distance until they're sure that someone is okay with and understands the whole CF thing.

There were so many things that made Ry special, and yes, he did have a zest for life, an easy smile and a lot of heart. But I think that 90% of his personality was just who he was. I think if he didn't have CF, he would have been similar to the guy I fell in love with and married. Maybe not as fantastically satrcastic and morbid, and I'd have missed that ability to make a joke out of anything, but I think I still would have fallen in love with him. But maybe I'm wrong.

I think one way we differed from 'healthy' couples, was that we could talk about anything. Death, sickness, politics, price of gas. We had an openness about our fears and dreams and thoughts that I don't see often in healthy couples. But to be fair, I don't see it in all Cf relationships either, so again, that might have just been us. I do think Cf forced us to talk about such issues, but I'm glad it did, because I think it helped make us as close as we were. The tin soldier and the ballerina being melted together in the fire and all that. But I might be tempted to agree with what Dreamer said....Ry said for a long time he didn't want to ask me to marry him because he didn't want to 'tie me to him'. Obviously, he changed his mind.

So I know I'm rambling, but I'm roundabout trying to answer your question. I think there may be factors affected by CF, but I think your core personality is more defined by how you are raised, and just who you are. I don't know if that's right, or I just want to imagine that Ry was a sweet guy outside of his CF, but I wanted to try and answer this question. Thanks for posting it, it was pretty interesting!

 

[Allie]

I don't know how much of Ry's heart was Ry himself, and how much was because of his Cf. I know when he was younger (and stupider) he slept around a bit because he felt like he had something to prove, having CF, and our culture in the US not being kind to guys that are thinner and shorter. But he grew the hell out of that, thank God. but honestly, that's the only part of the way he loved that I would call Cf related.

He had a huge heart, and was deeply loyal and loving of people that were close to him. He teased people he loved, that was how you knew he liked you. He did love fiercely, but I don't believe he fell out of love easily. When we broke up for a little bit about 6 months after we started dating (his fault, even he would admit to that), he camped out literally on my porch for a while until I agreed to take him back. Crazy kid, but an amazingly sweet one as well. I don't think Cfers have an enlightened sense of love and feeling, I think individual people do. I've met Cfers who were lovers, loyal and romantic. Then I've met some who weren't. It's a mixed bag, I think, like most personality traits. I think MAYBE one thing I've noticed is CFers tend to keep emotional distance until they're sure that someone is okay with and understands the whole CF thing.

There were so many things that made Ry special, and yes, he did have a zest for life, an easy smile and a lot of heart. But I think that 90% of his personality was just who he was. I think if he didn't have CF, he would have been similar to the guy I fell in love with and married. Maybe not as fantastically satrcastic and morbid, and I'd have missed that ability to make a joke out of anything, but I think I still would have fallen in love with him. But maybe I'm wrong.

I think one way we differed from 'healthy' couples, was that we could talk about anything. Death, sickness, politics, price of gas. We had an openness about our fears and dreams and thoughts that I don't see often in healthy couples. But to be fair, I don't see it in all Cf relationships either, so again, that might have just been us. I do think Cf forced us to talk about such issues, but I'm glad it did, because I think it helped make us as close as we were. The tin soldier and the ballerina being melted together in the fire and all that. But I might be tempted to agree with what Dreamer said....Ry said for a long time he didn't want to ask me to marry him because he didn't want to 'tie me to him'. Obviously, he changed his mind.

So I know I'm rambling, but I'm roundabout trying to answer your question. I think there may be factors affected by CF, but I think your core personality is more defined by how you are raised, and just who you are. I don't know if that's right, or I just want to imagine that Ry was a sweet guy outside of his CF, but I wanted to try and answer this question. Thanks for posting it, it was pretty interesting!

 

[Breezy]

I think it's completely normal. You're young too. To ditto what someone else said, "What is normal?"

I think first and formost it depends on the person, and how they react to things, plus previous experience. My first love (ugh if u want to call it that) i fell hard and fast and i stayed that way for quite sometime. And then i got hurt, and knew that things were going downhill but i couldn't admit it to myself. I know i'm not the only person who has experienced that.

And so, now, i'm single and perfectly ok, but i know that when i go into another relationship i will definately be more guarded and careful and not fall as hard and fast as i did. As well, it depends on how you care for the person. Where your investment lies...emotionally...physically...can u gain something by dating them...or more. Things like that. When it's right it's right and you will just know<img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-smile.gif" border="0"> I hope this is of some help!!

 

[Breezy]

I think it's completely normal. You're young too. To ditto what someone else said, "What is normal?"

I think first and formost it depends on the person, and how they react to things, plus previous experience. My first love (ugh if u want to call it that) i fell hard and fast and i stayed that way for quite sometime. And then i got hurt, and knew that things were going downhill but i couldn't admit it to myself. I know i'm not the only person who has experienced that.

And so, now, i'm single and perfectly ok, but i know that when i go into another relationship i will definately be more guarded and careful and not fall as hard and fast as i did. As well, it depends on how you care for the person. Where your investment lies...emotionally...physically...can u gain something by dating them...or more. Things like that. When it's right it's right and you will just know<img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-smile.gif" border="0"> I hope this is of some help!!

 

[Breezy]

I think it's completely normal. You're young too. To ditto what someone else said, "What is normal?"

I think first and formost it depends on the person, and how they react to things, plus previous experience. My first love (ugh if u want to call it that) i fell hard and fast and i stayed that way for quite sometime. And then i got hurt, and knew that things were going downhill but i couldn't admit it to myself. I know i'm not the only person who has experienced that.

And so, now, i'm single and perfectly ok, but i know that when i go into another relationship i will definately be more guarded and careful and not fall as hard and fast as i did. As well, it depends on how you care for the person. Where your investment lies...emotionally...physically...can u gain something by dating them...or more. Things like that. When it's right it's right and you will just know<img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-smile.gif" border="0"> I hope this is of some help!!

 

[NoExcuses]

I'm glad you decided to jump right in! <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-smile.gif" border="0"> <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-smile.gif" border="0"> <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-smile.gif" border="0">

I haven't read what others have said so I'll jump in my with opinion - I think everyone is different. Some are sensitive, some are guarded. You are who you are.

Some guys are sensitive, sweet and loving (like my boyfriend!) and some are heartless, distant and players. You can guess which one I prefer but people are just different in their personalities.

It's like asking - I like to watch movies, is that normal? Well some do and some don't. There's no normal.

Again, I'm glad you decided to start your own thread! And as you can see, many are eager to discuss with you <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-smile.gif" border="0">

 

[NoExcuses]

I'm glad you decided to jump right in! <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-smile.gif" border="0"> <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-smile.gif" border="0"> <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-smile.gif" border="0">

I haven't read what others have said so I'll jump in my with opinion - I think everyone is different. Some are sensitive, some are guarded. You are who you are.

Some guys are sensitive, sweet and loving (like my boyfriend!) and some are heartless, distant and players. You can guess which one I prefer but people are just different in their personalities.

It's like asking - I like to watch movies, is that normal? Well some do and some don't. There's no normal.

Again, I'm glad you decided to start your own thread! And as you can see, many are eager to discuss with you <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-smile.gif" border="0">

 

[NoExcuses]

I'm glad you decided to jump right in! <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-smile.gif" border="0"> <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-smile.gif" border="0"> <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-smile.gif" border="0">

I haven't read what others have said so I'll jump in my with opinion - I think everyone is different. Some are sensitive, some are guarded. You are who you are.

Some guys are sensitive, sweet and loving (like my boyfriend!) and some are heartless, distant and players. You can guess which one I prefer but people are just different in their personalities.

It's like asking - I like to watch movies, is that normal? Well some do and some don't. There's no normal.

Again, I'm glad you decided to start your own thread! And as you can see, many are eager to discuss with you <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-smile.gif" border="0">

 

[JazzysMom]

I know it seems that a CFer "should" have a better understanding and maybe desire to achieve the perfect love. Or even have a 6th sense, but I dont know if that is true. So much is related to personality and upbringing. For example.....my husband is 1 of 9 kids. His parents died when he was very young so his life has been one big ***** hole yet he not only knows how a family should be and should feel like, he is able to obtain that. Maybe its the not having it then propelled him forward in acheiving that. BUT if thats the case why not all his brothers/sisters? Just like a CFer you would think we would have an enhanced awareness of things. Yet some dont or some cant. A person might have it deep in them, but if they were never taught how to bring it out or use it properly then its as useless as titties on a boar hog!

 

[JazzysMom]

I know it seems that a CFer "should" have a better understanding and maybe desire to achieve the perfect love. Or even have a 6th sense, but I dont know if that is true. So much is related to personality and upbringing. For example.....my husband is 1 of 9 kids. His parents died when he was very young so his life has been one big ***** hole yet he not only knows how a family should be and should feel like, he is able to obtain that. Maybe its the not having it then propelled him forward in acheiving that. BUT if thats the case why not all his brothers/sisters? Just like a CFer you would think we would have an enhanced awareness of things. Yet some dont or some cant. A person might have it deep in them, but if they were never taught how to bring it out or use it properly then its as useless as titties on a boar hog!