What next for our future?

SARAHSARAH253 · Nov 12, 2007

I know I should be posting this in the pregnancy forum. But, I wanted advice from you guys as well. I had my first child Johnny this last August. He was born with a meconnium illius. We didn't know he had CF until the day we brought him from the hospital. That was in the end of September. That was the scariest and frustrating time. As I have posted before we were told I was a carrier and my husband was not a carrier. So, my doctor and I thought it be foolish to do an amino, because everything looked so good..Wrong! I have been learning to deal with accepting everything. My question is I have this huge rush in my heart to have another child.....for the simple fear I know I won't be able to go on if something should happen to my son. I know some of you may find this incredible selfish. Please don't scold me. I just know in my heart I couldn't handle it. I worked as a preschool teacher for over ten years....loving every minute of it. I met my husband and the minute he said let's make a baby....I quiet my job and consumed the last 9 months before my son was born planning and reading...can I say screw off What to Expect When your Expecting! Sorry, well my fear is real...and I have made the calls to look into PGD for our family. I thought that was our plan...Well this is really personal please don't get offended...but my husband and I had sex..and well he didn't keep up to his end of the deal...and now I think I could be pregnant...Am a terrible person to be excited. Even though I know I have my hands full. How many of you had other children after finding out your 1st baby had CF, and what method did you go about doing it. This is another thing I never thought I say...I have never been a fan of abortion, but I told my husband if I am pregnant and the amino did say our expected child had CF I wouldn't go threw with carrying it because I wouldn't want to risk it to our son....That I think if we could control it by PGD our son would be better off because of it. I am new to this and I have read its soooo bad for other CF kids to be together. Ahh.....please no one be angry with my words..I'm just scared...and my husband won't talk about it anymore...Eveyone keeps saying...Sarah it's been almost 2 months you have known this "STOP IT...YOU CAN"T FIX IT...WHY ARE YOUR CRYING'. It just hurts so damn much.....sorry

SARAHSARAH253 · Nov 12, 2007

I know I should be posting this in the pregnancy forum. But, I wanted advice from you guys as well. I had my first child Johnny this last August. He was born with a meconnium illius. We didn't know he had CF until the day we brought him from the hospital. That was in the end of September. That was the scariest and frustrating time. As I have posted before we were told I was a carrier and my husband was not a carrier. So, my doctor and I thought it be foolish to do an amino, because everything looked so good..Wrong! I have been learning to deal with accepting everything. My question is I have this huge rush in my heart to have another child.....for the simple fear I know I won't be able to go on if something should happen to my son. I know some of you may find this incredible selfish. Please don't scold me. I just know in my heart I couldn't handle it. I worked as a preschool teacher for over ten years....loving every minute of it. I met my husband and the minute he said let's make a baby....I quiet my job and consumed the last 9 months before my son was born planning and reading...can I say screw off What to Expect When your Expecting! Sorry, well my fear is real...and I have made the calls to look into PGD for our family. I thought that was our plan...Well this is really personal please don't get offended...but my husband and I had sex..and well he didn't keep up to his end of the deal...and now I think I could be pregnant...Am a terrible person to be excited. Even though I know I have my hands full. How many of you had other children after finding out your 1st baby had CF, and what method did you go about doing it. This is another thing I never thought I say...I have never been a fan of abortion, but I told my husband if I am pregnant and the amino did say our expected child had CF I wouldn't go threw with carrying it because I wouldn't want to risk it to our son....That I think if we could control it by PGD our son would be better off because of it. I am new to this and I have read its soooo bad for other CF kids to be together. Ahh.....please no one be angry with my words..I'm just scared...and my husband won't talk about it anymore...Eveyone keeps saying...Sarah it's been almost 2 months you have known this "STOP IT...YOU CAN"T FIX IT...WHY ARE YOUR CRYING'. It just hurts so damn much.....sorry

SARAHSARAH253 · Nov 12, 2007

I know I should be posting this in the pregnancy forum. But, I wanted advice from you guys as well. I had my first child Johnny this last August. He was born with a meconnium illius. We didn't know he had CF until the day we brought him from the hospital. That was in the end of September. That was the scariest and frustrating time. As I have posted before we were told I was a carrier and my husband was not a carrier. So, my doctor and I thought it be foolish to do an amino, because everything looked so good..Wrong! I have been learning to deal with accepting everything. My question is I have this huge rush in my heart to have another child.....for the simple fear I know I won't be able to go on if something should happen to my son. I know some of you may find this incredible selfish. Please don't scold me. I just know in my heart I couldn't handle it. I worked as a preschool teacher for over ten years....loving every minute of it. I met my husband and the minute he said let's make a baby....I quiet my job and consumed the last 9 months before my son was born planning and reading...can I say screw off What to Expect When your Expecting! Sorry, well my fear is real...and I have made the calls to look into PGD for our family. I thought that was our plan...Well this is really personal please don't get offended...but my husband and I had sex..and well he didn't keep up to his end of the deal...and now I think I could be pregnant...Am a terrible person to be excited. Even though I know I have my hands full. How many of you had other children after finding out your 1st baby had CF, and what method did you go about doing it. This is another thing I never thought I say...I have never been a fan of abortion, but I told my husband if I am pregnant and the amino did say our expected child had CF I wouldn't go threw with carrying it because I wouldn't want to risk it to our son....That I think if we could control it by PGD our son would be better off because of it. I am new to this and I have read its soooo bad for other CF kids to be together. Ahh.....please no one be angry with my words..I'm just scared...and my husband won't talk about it anymore...Eveyone keeps saying...Sarah it's been almost 2 months you have known this "STOP IT...YOU CAN"T FIX IT...WHY ARE YOUR CRYING'. It just hurts so damn much.....sorry

SARAHSARAH253 · Nov 12, 2007

I know I should be posting this in the pregnancy forum. But, I wanted advice from you guys as well. I had my first child Johnny this last August. He was born with a meconnium illius. We didn't know he had CF until the day we brought him from the hospital. That was in the end of September. That was the scariest and frustrating time. As I have posted before we were told I was a carrier and my husband was not a carrier. So, my doctor and I thought it be foolish to do an amino, because everything looked so good..Wrong! I have been learning to deal with accepting everything. My question is I have this huge rush in my heart to have another child.....for the simple fear I know I won't be able to go on if something should happen to my son. I know some of you may find this incredible selfish. Please don't scold me. I just know in my heart I couldn't handle it. I worked as a preschool teacher for over ten years....loving every minute of it. I met my husband and the minute he said let's make a baby....I quiet my job and consumed the last 9 months before my son was born planning and reading...can I say screw off What to Expect When your Expecting! Sorry, well my fear is real...and I have made the calls to look into PGD for our family. I thought that was our plan...Well this is really personal please don't get offended...but my husband and I had sex..and well he didn't keep up to his end of the deal...and now I think I could be pregnant...Am a terrible person to be excited. Even though I know I have my hands full. How many of you had other children after finding out your 1st baby had CF, and what method did you go about doing it. This is another thing I never thought I say...I have never been a fan of abortion, but I told my husband if I am pregnant and the amino did say our expected child had CF I wouldn't go threw with carrying it because I wouldn't want to risk it to our son....That I think if we could control it by PGD our son would be better off because of it. I am new to this and I have read its soooo bad for other CF kids to be together. Ahh.....please no one be angry with my words..I'm just scared...and my husband won't talk about it anymore...Eveyone keeps saying...Sarah it's been almost 2 months you have known this "STOP IT...YOU CAN"T FIX IT...WHY ARE YOUR CRYING'. It just hurts so damn much.....sorry

SARAHSARAH253 · Nov 12, 2007

I know I should be posting this in the pregnancy forum. But, I wanted advice from you guys as well. I had my first child Johnny this last August. He was born with a meconnium illius. We didn't know he had CF until the day we brought him from the hospital. That was in the end of September. That was the scariest and frustrating time. As I have posted before we were told I was a carrier and my husband was not a carrier. So, my doctor and I thought it be foolish to do an amino, because everything looked so good..Wrong! I have been learning to deal with accepting everything. My question is I have this huge rush in my heart to have another child.....for the simple fear I know I won't be able to go on if something should happen to my son. I know some of you may find this incredible selfish. Please don't scold me. I just know in my heart I couldn't handle it. I worked as a preschool teacher for over ten years....loving every minute of it. I met my husband and the minute he said let's make a baby....I quiet my job and consumed the last 9 months before my son was born planning and reading...can I say screw off What to Expect When your Expecting! Sorry, well my fear is real...and I have made the calls to look into PGD for our family. I thought that was our plan...Well this is really personal please don't get offended...but my husband and I had sex..and well he didn't keep up to his end of the deal...and now I think I could be pregnant...Am a terrible person to be excited. Even though I know I have my hands full. How many of you had other children after finding out your 1st baby had CF, and what method did you go about doing it. This is another thing I never thought I say...I have never been a fan of abortion, but I told my husband if I am pregnant and the amino did say our expected child had CF I wouldn't go threw with carrying it because I wouldn't want to risk it to our son....That I think if we could control it by PGD our son would be better off because of it. I am new to this and I have read its soooo bad for other CF kids to be together. Ahh.....please no one be angry with my words..I'm just scared...and my husband won't talk about it anymore...Eveyone keeps saying...Sarah it's been almost 2 months you have known this "STOP IT...YOU CAN"T FIX IT...WHY ARE YOUR CRYING'. It just hurts so damn much.....sorry

Buckeye · Nov 12, 2007

I think the overwelming craving to have another child shortly after your first born is diagnosed with a chronic disease is common thing. Stupid as it sounds it's almost like you feel you didn't do it right the first time and are trying to get it right this time. But your baby is very young right now and you should probably wait at least a year to try to conceive again (and with PGD) so you can make sure you are emotionally ready to have another baby. Now if you are really pregnant now, that advice is useless. As for your husband "not keeping up his end of the deal" I have no idea what that means, probably TMI for me, but if you are talking about birth control then I would suggest you find a method of birth control YOU are comfortable with and use it until you are ready to conceive again. The thought of it being the man's responsibility went by the wayside about 50 years ago. <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-blush.gif" border="0">

Buckeye · Nov 12, 2007

I think the overwelming craving to have another child shortly after your first born is diagnosed with a chronic disease is common thing. Stupid as it sounds it's almost like you feel you didn't do it right the first time and are trying to get it right this time. But your baby is very young right now and you should probably wait at least a year to try to conceive again (and with PGD) so you can make sure you are emotionally ready to have another baby. Now if you are really pregnant now, that advice is useless. As for your husband "not keeping up his end of the deal" I have no idea what that means, probably TMI for me, but if you are talking about birth control then I would suggest you find a method of birth control YOU are comfortable with and use it until you are ready to conceive again. The thought of it being the man's responsibility went by the wayside about 50 years ago. <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-blush.gif" border="0">

Buckeye · Nov 12, 2007

I think the overwelming craving to have another child shortly after your first born is diagnosed with a chronic disease is common thing. Stupid as it sounds it's almost like you feel you didn't do it right the first time and are trying to get it right this time. But your baby is very young right now and you should probably wait at least a year to try to conceive again (and with PGD) so you can make sure you are emotionally ready to have another baby. Now if you are really pregnant now, that advice is useless. As for your husband "not keeping up his end of the deal" I have no idea what that means, probably TMI for me, but if you are talking about birth control then I would suggest you find a method of birth control YOU are comfortable with and use it until you are ready to conceive again. The thought of it being the man's responsibility went by the wayside about 50 years ago. <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-blush.gif" border="0">

Buckeye · Nov 12, 2007

I think the overwelming craving to have another child shortly after your first born is diagnosed with a chronic disease is common thing. Stupid as it sounds it's almost like you feel you didn't do it right the first time and are trying to get it right this time. But your baby is very young right now and you should probably wait at least a year to try to conceive again (and with PGD) so you can make sure you are emotionally ready to have another baby. Now if you are really pregnant now, that advice is useless. As for your husband "not keeping up his end of the deal" I have no idea what that means, probably TMI for me, but if you are talking about birth control then I would suggest you find a method of birth control YOU are comfortable with and use it until you are ready to conceive again. The thought of it being the man's responsibility went by the wayside about 50 years ago. <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-blush.gif" border="0">

Buckeye · Nov 12, 2007

I think the overwelming craving to have another child shortly after your first born is diagnosed with a chronic disease is common thing. Stupid as it sounds it's almost like you feel you didn't do it right the first time and are trying to get it right this time. But your baby is very young right now and you should probably wait at least a year to try to conceive again (and with PGD) so you can make sure you are emotionally ready to have another baby. Now if you are really pregnant now, that advice is useless. As for your husband "not keeping up his end of the deal" I have no idea what that means, probably TMI for me, but if you are talking about birth control then I would suggest you find a method of birth control YOU are comfortable with and use it until you are ready to conceive again. The thought of it being the man's responsibility went by the wayside about 50 years ago. <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-blush.gif" border="0">

purplemartin · Nov 12, 2007

Briceton was not planned to be our last child, my last pregnancy, or my last labor and delivery, and it hurts deeply to think that having another child is pretty much out of our future as a family. But for us, it wasn't so much the CF factor, but more on the lines of already having our hands full. Briceton requires a LOT of attention with his CF and having a 4 year old....well that pretty much says it all, LOL! I personally believe each child is a blessing and would never look down on anyone for expanding (natural, adoption, PGD, etc..) their family after a child's CF diagnosis. There are many here who are wonderful parents to 2,3,4,5,6 children with CF!

However, and with the above being said, I can't believe you came on a CF forum talking abortion if your child showed positive with CF through amino! Please, please, realize that you and your husband need to live up to both of yours "end of the bargain" to this unborn child! It's not the unborn child's fault for your irresponsibleness the night you laid down and your husband didn't "live up to his end of the bargain". You both new the risk and what was involved! This is life that you are playing with not a game!

If you and your husband decide to expand your family, I'm happy for you, but please do it responsibly!

Thought I would add, I'm 100% pro-choice, but not when used as birth control!

I wish your family the best, sincerely!

purplemartin · Nov 12, 2007

Briceton was not planned to be our last child, my last pregnancy, or my last labor and delivery, and it hurts deeply to think that having another child is pretty much out of our future as a family. But for us, it wasn't so much the CF factor, but more on the lines of already having our hands full. Briceton requires a LOT of attention with his CF and having a 4 year old....well that pretty much says it all, LOL! I personally believe each child is a blessing and would never look down on anyone for expanding (natural, adoption, PGD, etc..) their family after a child's CF diagnosis. There are many here who are wonderful parents to 2,3,4,5,6 children with CF!

However, and with the above being said, I can't believe you came on a CF forum talking abortion if your child showed positive with CF through amino! Please, please, realize that you and your husband need to live up to both of yours "end of the bargain" to this unborn child! It's not the unborn child's fault for your irresponsibleness the night you laid down and your husband didn't "live up to his end of the bargain". You both new the risk and what was involved! This is life that you are playing with not a game!

If you and your husband decide to expand your family, I'm happy for you, but please do it responsibly!

Thought I would add, I'm 100% pro-choice, but not when used as birth control!

I wish your family the best, sincerely!

purplemartin · Nov 12, 2007

Briceton was not planned to be our last child, my last pregnancy, or my last labor and delivery, and it hurts deeply to think that having another child is pretty much out of our future as a family. But for us, it wasn't so much the CF factor, but more on the lines of already having our hands full. Briceton requires a LOT of attention with his CF and having a 4 year old....well that pretty much says it all, LOL! I personally believe each child is a blessing and would never look down on anyone for expanding (natural, adoption, PGD, etc..) their family after a child's CF diagnosis. There are many here who are wonderful parents to 2,3,4,5,6 children with CF!

However, and with the above being said, I can't believe you came on a CF forum talking abortion if your child showed positive with CF through amino! Please, please, realize that you and your husband need to live up to both of yours "end of the bargain" to this unborn child! It's not the unborn child's fault for your irresponsibleness the night you laid down and your husband didn't "live up to his end of the bargain". You both new the risk and what was involved! This is life that you are playing with not a game!

If you and your husband decide to expand your family, I'm happy for you, but please do it responsibly!

Thought I would add, I'm 100% pro-choice, but not when used as birth control!

I wish your family the best, sincerely!

purplemartin · Nov 12, 2007

Briceton was not planned to be our last child, my last pregnancy, or my last labor and delivery, and it hurts deeply to think that having another child is pretty much out of our future as a family. But for us, it wasn't so much the CF factor, but more on the lines of already having our hands full. Briceton requires a LOT of attention with his CF and having a 4 year old....well that pretty much says it all, LOL! I personally believe each child is a blessing and would never look down on anyone for expanding (natural, adoption, PGD, etc..) their family after a child's CF diagnosis. There are many here who are wonderful parents to 2,3,4,5,6 children with CF!

However, and with the above being said, I can't believe you came on a CF forum talking abortion if your child showed positive with CF through amino! Please, please, realize that you and your husband need to live up to both of yours "end of the bargain" to this unborn child! It's not the unborn child's fault for your irresponsibleness the night you laid down and your husband didn't "live up to his end of the bargain". You both new the risk and what was involved! This is life that you are playing with not a game!

If you and your husband decide to expand your family, I'm happy for you, but please do it responsibly!

Thought I would add, I'm 100% pro-choice, but not when used as birth control!

I wish your family the best, sincerely!

purplemartin · Nov 12, 2007

Briceton was not planned to be our last child, my last pregnancy, or my last labor and delivery, and it hurts deeply to think that having another child is pretty much out of our future as a family. But for us, it wasn't so much the CF factor, but more on the lines of already having our hands full. Briceton requires a LOT of attention with his CF and having a 4 year old....well that pretty much says it all, LOL! I personally believe each child is a blessing and would never look down on anyone for expanding (natural, adoption, PGD, etc..) their family after a child's CF diagnosis. There are many here who are wonderful parents to 2,3,4,5,6 children with CF!

However, and with the above being said, I can't believe you came on a CF forum talking abortion if your child showed positive with CF through amino! Please, please, realize that you and your husband need to live up to both of yours "end of the bargain" to this unborn child! It's not the unborn child's fault for your irresponsibleness the night you laid down and your husband didn't "live up to his end of the bargain". You both new the risk and what was involved! This is life that you are playing with not a game!

If you and your husband decide to expand your family, I'm happy for you, but please do it responsibly!

Thought I would add, I'm 100% pro-choice, but not when used as birth control!

I wish your family the best, sincerely!

Mommafirst · Nov 12, 2007

Sarah,

I don't think there is anything wrong with all the thoughts in your head. CF brings a lot of our lives to a grinding halt.

I agree with Buckeye. If you are NOT already pregnant, considering doing everything you can to hold off and see what life will be like taking care of your CF child. If after a year or two you feel you could handle a second CF child, then it is your right to take the risk. Personally, I would consider adoption or IVF because I would be very sad to bring another child into this world to deal with CF. But its really easy for me to say as I knew my dd would be my last child.

If you are pregnant, you are pregnant. I will hope for you that the new baby doesn't have CF, but if he or she does, you will be okay. The child will be okay. You will still have an amazing child you love to pieces. I couldn't imagine life without my dd. She is perfect in every way. CF is just one of the extra struggles she'll endure. I wouldn't wish CF on anyone, but I wouldn't wish someone away because of their CF.

I'm sorry you are so confused and overwhelmed with all of this. I hope, over time, you will find peace and an answer that works for you.

Mommafirst · Nov 12, 2007

Sarah,

I don't think there is anything wrong with all the thoughts in your head. CF brings a lot of our lives to a grinding halt.

I agree with Buckeye. If you are NOT already pregnant, considering doing everything you can to hold off and see what life will be like taking care of your CF child. If after a year or two you feel you could handle a second CF child, then it is your right to take the risk. Personally, I would consider adoption or IVF because I would be very sad to bring another child into this world to deal with CF. But its really easy for me to say as I knew my dd would be my last child.

If you are pregnant, you are pregnant. I will hope for you that the new baby doesn't have CF, but if he or she does, you will be okay. The child will be okay. You will still have an amazing child you love to pieces. I couldn't imagine life without my dd. She is perfect in every way. CF is just one of the extra struggles she'll endure. I wouldn't wish CF on anyone, but I wouldn't wish someone away because of their CF.

I'm sorry you are so confused and overwhelmed with all of this. I hope, over time, you will find peace and an answer that works for you.

Mommafirst · Nov 12, 2007

Sarah,

I don't think there is anything wrong with all the thoughts in your head. CF brings a lot of our lives to a grinding halt.

I agree with Buckeye. If you are NOT already pregnant, considering doing everything you can to hold off and see what life will be like taking care of your CF child. If after a year or two you feel you could handle a second CF child, then it is your right to take the risk. Personally, I would consider adoption or IVF because I would be very sad to bring another child into this world to deal with CF. But its really easy for me to say as I knew my dd would be my last child.

If you are pregnant, you are pregnant. I will hope for you that the new baby doesn't have CF, but if he or she does, you will be okay. The child will be okay. You will still have an amazing child you love to pieces. I couldn't imagine life without my dd. She is perfect in every way. CF is just one of the extra struggles she'll endure. I wouldn't wish CF on anyone, but I wouldn't wish someone away because of their CF.

I'm sorry you are so confused and overwhelmed with all of this. I hope, over time, you will find peace and an answer that works for you.

Mommafirst · Nov 12, 2007

Sarah,

I don't think there is anything wrong with all the thoughts in your head. CF brings a lot of our lives to a grinding halt.

I agree with Buckeye. If you are NOT already pregnant, considering doing everything you can to hold off and see what life will be like taking care of your CF child. If after a year or two you feel you could handle a second CF child, then it is your right to take the risk. Personally, I would consider adoption or IVF because I would be very sad to bring another child into this world to deal with CF. But its really easy for me to say as I knew my dd would be my last child.

If you are pregnant, you are pregnant. I will hope for you that the new baby doesn't have CF, but if he or she does, you will be okay. The child will be okay. You will still have an amazing child you love to pieces. I couldn't imagine life without my dd. She is perfect in every way. CF is just one of the extra struggles she'll endure. I wouldn't wish CF on anyone, but I wouldn't wish someone away because of their CF.

I'm sorry you are so confused and overwhelmed with all of this. I hope, over time, you will find peace and an answer that works for you.

Mommafirst · Nov 12, 2007

Sarah,

I don't think there is anything wrong with all the thoughts in your head. CF brings a lot of our lives to a grinding halt.

I agree with Buckeye. If you are NOT already pregnant, considering doing everything you can to hold off and see what life will be like taking care of your CF child. If after a year or two you feel you could handle a second CF child, then it is your right to take the risk. Personally, I would consider adoption or IVF because I would be very sad to bring another child into this world to deal with CF. But its really easy for me to say as I knew my dd would be my last child.

If you are pregnant, you are pregnant. I will hope for you that the new baby doesn't have CF, but if he or she does, you will be okay. The child will be okay. You will still have an amazing child you love to pieces. I couldn't imagine life without my dd. She is perfect in every way. CF is just one of the extra struggles she'll endure. I wouldn't wish CF on anyone, but I wouldn't wish someone away because of their CF.

I'm sorry you are so confused and overwhelmed with all of this. I hope, over time, you will find peace and an answer that works for you.

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