Going for the 2nd baby

S

Scarlett81

New member
Things are going pretty good here with us. My MIL says they must be or I wouldn't even be considering a 2nd child. lol
Vienna is going to be 6 months this week! I want to cry....it goes so fast.

I'm finding myself already thinking about another one. Before I had my LO I had my 'plan'. Have her, and then next summer (summer of 08), get preg again with my next. Do it fast and while I'm young. My doc also says that if I do want more, to try to get it done quickly. I guess she feels that would be best for me.

Once she was born, I felt like...ok, I just want to enjoy her and not think of another one right now. My hubby was like-ok, lets go have the next!! We totally switched feelings. But he definitely would respect my or my docs feelings of not doing it if I can't. If it was up to him though, (regardless of health) we'd be getting preg today.

I guess I want to be the best I can for her. I'd LOVE more children. My feelings have always been to only do it if my health is as good as it was pre-Vienna. I've gotten my pfts back up-fev1 75 at preg, 45 halfway through and 68 right now. So I'm getting there.
So basically I feel torn right now. The thought of not being able to have another one pains me. But I want to be here for the child I have already. Time will tell. It may work out fine. Its still too soon to tell. I think that if I'm not 100% by summer, I'm not going to have another.
But, I can imagine that even if my pfts were amazing and doc said to go for it, to take that big leap would be scary!

So I wanted to start a discussion about having a 2nd baby. I think most of us mom cfers are so focused on the possibility and dream of having one child, that we don't think too much about the possibliity of having a second.

If you are about to have your 2nd, or already have more than one-please share your experience. Things like this:
How did you take that leap and decide to have more than one? How did your spouse/partner feel about having more than one? Were their feelings a big part of how you made your decision? How did your doctor feel about it? Did you have much of a plan with your doc, like I'm doing, or did you wing it?

What has been the biggest challenge of having more than one?-and the biggest reward?

If you have your first child, like me-how do you feel about having another?
 
S

Scarlett81

New member
Things are going pretty good here with us. My MIL says they must be or I wouldn't even be considering a 2nd child. lol
Vienna is going to be 6 months this week! I want to cry....it goes so fast.

I'm finding myself already thinking about another one. Before I had my LO I had my 'plan'. Have her, and then next summer (summer of 08), get preg again with my next. Do it fast and while I'm young. My doc also says that if I do want more, to try to get it done quickly. I guess she feels that would be best for me.

Once she was born, I felt like...ok, I just want to enjoy her and not think of another one right now. My hubby was like-ok, lets go have the next!! We totally switched feelings. But he definitely would respect my or my docs feelings of not doing it if I can't. If it was up to him though, (regardless of health) we'd be getting preg today.

I guess I want to be the best I can for her. I'd LOVE more children. My feelings have always been to only do it if my health is as good as it was pre-Vienna. I've gotten my pfts back up-fev1 75 at preg, 45 halfway through and 68 right now. So I'm getting there.
So basically I feel torn right now. The thought of not being able to have another one pains me. But I want to be here for the child I have already. Time will tell. It may work out fine. Its still too soon to tell. I think that if I'm not 100% by summer, I'm not going to have another.
But, I can imagine that even if my pfts were amazing and doc said to go for it, to take that big leap would be scary!

So I wanted to start a discussion about having a 2nd baby. I think most of us mom cfers are so focused on the possibility and dream of having one child, that we don't think too much about the possibliity of having a second.

If you are about to have your 2nd, or already have more than one-please share your experience. Things like this:
How did you take that leap and decide to have more than one? How did your spouse/partner feel about having more than one? Were their feelings a big part of how you made your decision? How did your doctor feel about it? Did you have much of a plan with your doc, like I'm doing, or did you wing it?

What has been the biggest challenge of having more than one?-and the biggest reward?

If you have your first child, like me-how do you feel about having another?
 
S

Scarlett81

New member
Things are going pretty good here with us. My MIL says they must be or I wouldn't even be considering a 2nd child. lol
Vienna is going to be 6 months this week! I want to cry....it goes so fast.

I'm finding myself already thinking about another one. Before I had my LO I had my 'plan'. Have her, and then next summer (summer of 08), get preg again with my next. Do it fast and while I'm young. My doc also says that if I do want more, to try to get it done quickly. I guess she feels that would be best for me.

Once she was born, I felt like...ok, I just want to enjoy her and not think of another one right now. My hubby was like-ok, lets go have the next!! We totally switched feelings. But he definitely would respect my or my docs feelings of not doing it if I can't. If it was up to him though, (regardless of health) we'd be getting preg today.

I guess I want to be the best I can for her. I'd LOVE more children. My feelings have always been to only do it if my health is as good as it was pre-Vienna. I've gotten my pfts back up-fev1 75 at preg, 45 halfway through and 68 right now. So I'm getting there.
So basically I feel torn right now. The thought of not being able to have another one pains me. But I want to be here for the child I have already. Time will tell. It may work out fine. Its still too soon to tell. I think that if I'm not 100% by summer, I'm not going to have another.
But, I can imagine that even if my pfts were amazing and doc said to go for it, to take that big leap would be scary!

So I wanted to start a discussion about having a 2nd baby. I think most of us mom cfers are so focused on the possibility and dream of having one child, that we don't think too much about the possibliity of having a second.

If you are about to have your 2nd, or already have more than one-please share your experience. Things like this:
How did you take that leap and decide to have more than one? How did your spouse/partner feel about having more than one? Were their feelings a big part of how you made your decision? How did your doctor feel about it? Did you have much of a plan with your doc, like I'm doing, or did you wing it?

What has been the biggest challenge of having more than one?-and the biggest reward?

If you have your first child, like me-how do you feel about having another?
 
S

Scarlett81

New member
Things are going pretty good here with us. My MIL says they must be or I wouldn't even be considering a 2nd child. lol
Vienna is going to be 6 months this week! I want to cry....it goes so fast.

I'm finding myself already thinking about another one. Before I had my LO I had my 'plan'. Have her, and then next summer (summer of 08), get preg again with my next. Do it fast and while I'm young. My doc also says that if I do want more, to try to get it done quickly. I guess she feels that would be best for me.

Once she was born, I felt like...ok, I just want to enjoy her and not think of another one right now. My hubby was like-ok, lets go have the next!! We totally switched feelings. But he definitely would respect my or my docs feelings of not doing it if I can't. If it was up to him though, (regardless of health) we'd be getting preg today.

I guess I want to be the best I can for her. I'd LOVE more children. My feelings have always been to only do it if my health is as good as it was pre-Vienna. I've gotten my pfts back up-fev1 75 at preg, 45 halfway through and 68 right now. So I'm getting there.
So basically I feel torn right now. The thought of not being able to have another one pains me. But I want to be here for the child I have already. Time will tell. It may work out fine. Its still too soon to tell. I think that if I'm not 100% by summer, I'm not going to have another.
But, I can imagine that even if my pfts were amazing and doc said to go for it, to take that big leap would be scary!

So I wanted to start a discussion about having a 2nd baby. I think most of us mom cfers are so focused on the possibility and dream of having one child, that we don't think too much about the possibliity of having a second.

If you are about to have your 2nd, or already have more than one-please share your experience. Things like this:
How did you take that leap and decide to have more than one? How did your spouse/partner feel about having more than one? Were their feelings a big part of how you made your decision? How did your doctor feel about it? Did you have much of a plan with your doc, like I'm doing, or did you wing it?

What has been the biggest challenge of having more than one?-and the biggest reward?

If you have your first child, like me-how do you feel about having another?
 
S

Scarlett81

New member
Things are going pretty good here with us. My MIL says they must be or I wouldn't even be considering a 2nd child. lol
Vienna is going to be 6 months this week! I want to cry....it goes so fast.

I'm finding myself already thinking about another one. Before I had my LO I had my 'plan'. Have her, and then next summer (summer of 08), get preg again with my next. Do it fast and while I'm young. My doc also says that if I do want more, to try to get it done quickly. I guess she feels that would be best for me.

Once she was born, I felt like...ok, I just want to enjoy her and not think of another one right now. My hubby was like-ok, lets go have the next!! We totally switched feelings. But he definitely would respect my or my docs feelings of not doing it if I can't. If it was up to him though, (regardless of health) we'd be getting preg today.

I guess I want to be the best I can for her. I'd LOVE more children. My feelings have always been to only do it if my health is as good as it was pre-Vienna. I've gotten my pfts back up-fev1 75 at preg, 45 halfway through and 68 right now. So I'm getting there.
So basically I feel torn right now. The thought of not being able to have another one pains me. But I want to be here for the child I have already. Time will tell. It may work out fine. Its still too soon to tell. I think that if I'm not 100% by summer, I'm not going to have another.
But, I can imagine that even if my pfts were amazing and doc said to go for it, to take that big leap would be scary!

So I wanted to start a discussion about having a 2nd baby. I think most of us mom cfers are so focused on the possibility and dream of having one child, that we don't think too much about the possibliity of having a second.

If you are about to have your 2nd, or already have more than one-please share your experience. Things like this:
How did you take that leap and decide to have more than one? How did your spouse/partner feel about having more than one? Were their feelings a big part of how you made your decision? How did your doctor feel about it? Did you have much of a plan with your doc, like I'm doing, or did you wing it?

What has been the biggest challenge of having more than one?-and the biggest reward?

If you have your first child, like me-how do you feel about having another?
 
K

Keepercjr

Guest
Christian

I knew I wanted 2 children (maybe 3 but DH says no). So after having the first it was just about waiting till the time was right for #2. I was in grad school so basically it was going to be dictated by when I was done with school. I ended up taking a break this summer for 2 years (medical leave) and will reassess it when time is up. Since I was on this break I decided that now was the right time. I was terrified of having kids closer than 2 years apart but even 2 years was way too close for me. Logan is a very intense child and still needs my undivided attention. And I'm so glad they weren't 2 years apart. I knew people who have kids Logan's age and were on #2 when they turned 2 and I saw how hard it was for them. They managed but I figured there has to be an easier way. So I decided that they should be around 3 years apart and when #2 arrives they'll be 3.5 years exactly.

I am still really scared at the thought of taking care of 2 children. But I figured that I'll always be scared and I can't let fear dictate what I want in life. I'm scared of having to go into the hospital for something out of my control (like preterm labor) even though I have no risk factors. I just don't want to be forcefully separated from Logan who has never spent a night away from my side. I don't want some future sibling that isn't even here yet (and until recently was only a though) mess things up for the child who is already here (if that makes sense). For example, I was not willing to wean him to get pregnant or if I had some risk factor that would make it necessary to spend part of my pregnancy in the hospital then there is a good chance that I would not have had another, we would have adopted, or I would have waited MUCH longer to get pregnant again.

If Logan was a more laid back baby or toddler then maybe I would have felt comfortable having kids closer in age but it wouldn't have mattered anyway because of the school issue. We basically started trying as soon as I finalized my break. I'm still nervous at how he'll react when the new baby comes but I have much hope that he'll be a great big brother.

Oh one of the things that really settled it for me that I didn't want them close together is when I took care of my nephew for a few days a week when Logan was 18 months old. As long as I had the baby in the sling Logan did ok..... until he wanted to be held or to nurse. Sometimes I could set the baby down and hold Logan but there was a day when the baby needed to be rocked and bounced and Logan needed to nurse (naptime for him). If I stopped bouncing the baby (while walking around) he would start to scream. And Logan needed me so he would scream if I couldn't hold him. I had to put baby first and try to take care of Logan without holding him at least while I got baby calmed and Logan screamed for about 5 minutes to the point of almost hyperventilating. He couldn't understand why I couldn't hold him like I always did. Eventually I was able to rock in my recliner w/ baby on my shoulder and Logan nursing in my lap. From that day forward whenever I watched my nephew I had my dad come over so he could help me w/ them. With 2 sets of hands it was a piece of cake but man... that experience really made an imprint for me. Logan just wasn't ready to share me and he had no way to grasp it yet.

All of what I said above are my personal feelings. I know that some people like close age gaps. But when I weighed my son's personality, my health, and my ability to effectively care for 2 kids, the logical choice for my situation was to wait. I am and will always be their main caregiver so my preferences come first <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-smile.gif" border="0">

Lastly - I don't know how long you planned to breastfeed for but keep in mind that if you are still breastfeeding when you decide to get pregnant again, you may not be able to on your own. I had my periods back for over a year before we TTC but I still wasn't fertile because nursing can cause a short luteal phase. The choices were either to wean Logan (not an option) or use progesterone. And if you had planned to nurse longer than a year, keep in mind that she very well could wean during your next pregnancy due to the drop in milk supply that almost always happens w/ pregnancy. Nursing may not be a factor for anyone else but it was for me.
 
K

Keepercjr

Guest
Christian

I knew I wanted 2 children (maybe 3 but DH says no). So after having the first it was just about waiting till the time was right for #2. I was in grad school so basically it was going to be dictated by when I was done with school. I ended up taking a break this summer for 2 years (medical leave) and will reassess it when time is up. Since I was on this break I decided that now was the right time. I was terrified of having kids closer than 2 years apart but even 2 years was way too close for me. Logan is a very intense child and still needs my undivided attention. And I'm so glad they weren't 2 years apart. I knew people who have kids Logan's age and were on #2 when they turned 2 and I saw how hard it was for them. They managed but I figured there has to be an easier way. So I decided that they should be around 3 years apart and when #2 arrives they'll be 3.5 years exactly.

I am still really scared at the thought of taking care of 2 children. But I figured that I'll always be scared and I can't let fear dictate what I want in life. I'm scared of having to go into the hospital for something out of my control (like preterm labor) even though I have no risk factors. I just don't want to be forcefully separated from Logan who has never spent a night away from my side. I don't want some future sibling that isn't even here yet (and until recently was only a though) mess things up for the child who is already here (if that makes sense). For example, I was not willing to wean him to get pregnant or if I had some risk factor that would make it necessary to spend part of my pregnancy in the hospital then there is a good chance that I would not have had another, we would have adopted, or I would have waited MUCH longer to get pregnant again.

If Logan was a more laid back baby or toddler then maybe I would have felt comfortable having kids closer in age but it wouldn't have mattered anyway because of the school issue. We basically started trying as soon as I finalized my break. I'm still nervous at how he'll react when the new baby comes but I have much hope that he'll be a great big brother.

Oh one of the things that really settled it for me that I didn't want them close together is when I took care of my nephew for a few days a week when Logan was 18 months old. As long as I had the baby in the sling Logan did ok..... until he wanted to be held or to nurse. Sometimes I could set the baby down and hold Logan but there was a day when the baby needed to be rocked and bounced and Logan needed to nurse (naptime for him). If I stopped bouncing the baby (while walking around) he would start to scream. And Logan needed me so he would scream if I couldn't hold him. I had to put baby first and try to take care of Logan without holding him at least while I got baby calmed and Logan screamed for about 5 minutes to the point of almost hyperventilating. He couldn't understand why I couldn't hold him like I always did. Eventually I was able to rock in my recliner w/ baby on my shoulder and Logan nursing in my lap. From that day forward whenever I watched my nephew I had my dad come over so he could help me w/ them. With 2 sets of hands it was a piece of cake but man... that experience really made an imprint for me. Logan just wasn't ready to share me and he had no way to grasp it yet.

All of what I said above are my personal feelings. I know that some people like close age gaps. But when I weighed my son's personality, my health, and my ability to effectively care for 2 kids, the logical choice for my situation was to wait. I am and will always be their main caregiver so my preferences come first <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-smile.gif" border="0">

Lastly - I don't know how long you planned to breastfeed for but keep in mind that if you are still breastfeeding when you decide to get pregnant again, you may not be able to on your own. I had my periods back for over a year before we TTC but I still wasn't fertile because nursing can cause a short luteal phase. The choices were either to wean Logan (not an option) or use progesterone. And if you had planned to nurse longer than a year, keep in mind that she very well could wean during your next pregnancy due to the drop in milk supply that almost always happens w/ pregnancy. Nursing may not be a factor for anyone else but it was for me.
 
K

Keepercjr

Guest
Christian

I knew I wanted 2 children (maybe 3 but DH says no). So after having the first it was just about waiting till the time was right for #2. I was in grad school so basically it was going to be dictated by when I was done with school. I ended up taking a break this summer for 2 years (medical leave) and will reassess it when time is up. Since I was on this break I decided that now was the right time. I was terrified of having kids closer than 2 years apart but even 2 years was way too close for me. Logan is a very intense child and still needs my undivided attention. And I'm so glad they weren't 2 years apart. I knew people who have kids Logan's age and were on #2 when they turned 2 and I saw how hard it was for them. They managed but I figured there has to be an easier way. So I decided that they should be around 3 years apart and when #2 arrives they'll be 3.5 years exactly.

I am still really scared at the thought of taking care of 2 children. But I figured that I'll always be scared and I can't let fear dictate what I want in life. I'm scared of having to go into the hospital for something out of my control (like preterm labor) even though I have no risk factors. I just don't want to be forcefully separated from Logan who has never spent a night away from my side. I don't want some future sibling that isn't even here yet (and until recently was only a though) mess things up for the child who is already here (if that makes sense). For example, I was not willing to wean him to get pregnant or if I had some risk factor that would make it necessary to spend part of my pregnancy in the hospital then there is a good chance that I would not have had another, we would have adopted, or I would have waited MUCH longer to get pregnant again.

If Logan was a more laid back baby or toddler then maybe I would have felt comfortable having kids closer in age but it wouldn't have mattered anyway because of the school issue. We basically started trying as soon as I finalized my break. I'm still nervous at how he'll react when the new baby comes but I have much hope that he'll be a great big brother.

Oh one of the things that really settled it for me that I didn't want them close together is when I took care of my nephew for a few days a week when Logan was 18 months old. As long as I had the baby in the sling Logan did ok..... until he wanted to be held or to nurse. Sometimes I could set the baby down and hold Logan but there was a day when the baby needed to be rocked and bounced and Logan needed to nurse (naptime for him). If I stopped bouncing the baby (while walking around) he would start to scream. And Logan needed me so he would scream if I couldn't hold him. I had to put baby first and try to take care of Logan without holding him at least while I got baby calmed and Logan screamed for about 5 minutes to the point of almost hyperventilating. He couldn't understand why I couldn't hold him like I always did. Eventually I was able to rock in my recliner w/ baby on my shoulder and Logan nursing in my lap. From that day forward whenever I watched my nephew I had my dad come over so he could help me w/ them. With 2 sets of hands it was a piece of cake but man... that experience really made an imprint for me. Logan just wasn't ready to share me and he had no way to grasp it yet.

All of what I said above are my personal feelings. I know that some people like close age gaps. But when I weighed my son's personality, my health, and my ability to effectively care for 2 kids, the logical choice for my situation was to wait. I am and will always be their main caregiver so my preferences come first <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-smile.gif" border="0">

Lastly - I don't know how long you planned to breastfeed for but keep in mind that if you are still breastfeeding when you decide to get pregnant again, you may not be able to on your own. I had my periods back for over a year before we TTC but I still wasn't fertile because nursing can cause a short luteal phase. The choices were either to wean Logan (not an option) or use progesterone. And if you had planned to nurse longer than a year, keep in mind that she very well could wean during your next pregnancy due to the drop in milk supply that almost always happens w/ pregnancy. Nursing may not be a factor for anyone else but it was for me.
 
K

Keepercjr

Guest
Christian

I knew I wanted 2 children (maybe 3 but DH says no). So after having the first it was just about waiting till the time was right for #2. I was in grad school so basically it was going to be dictated by when I was done with school. I ended up taking a break this summer for 2 years (medical leave) and will reassess it when time is up. Since I was on this break I decided that now was the right time. I was terrified of having kids closer than 2 years apart but even 2 years was way too close for me. Logan is a very intense child and still needs my undivided attention. And I'm so glad they weren't 2 years apart. I knew people who have kids Logan's age and were on #2 when they turned 2 and I saw how hard it was for them. They managed but I figured there has to be an easier way. So I decided that they should be around 3 years apart and when #2 arrives they'll be 3.5 years exactly.

I am still really scared at the thought of taking care of 2 children. But I figured that I'll always be scared and I can't let fear dictate what I want in life. I'm scared of having to go into the hospital for something out of my control (like preterm labor) even though I have no risk factors. I just don't want to be forcefully separated from Logan who has never spent a night away from my side. I don't want some future sibling that isn't even here yet (and until recently was only a though) mess things up for the child who is already here (if that makes sense). For example, I was not willing to wean him to get pregnant or if I had some risk factor that would make it necessary to spend part of my pregnancy in the hospital then there is a good chance that I would not have had another, we would have adopted, or I would have waited MUCH longer to get pregnant again.

If Logan was a more laid back baby or toddler then maybe I would have felt comfortable having kids closer in age but it wouldn't have mattered anyway because of the school issue. We basically started trying as soon as I finalized my break. I'm still nervous at how he'll react when the new baby comes but I have much hope that he'll be a great big brother.

Oh one of the things that really settled it for me that I didn't want them close together is when I took care of my nephew for a few days a week when Logan was 18 months old. As long as I had the baby in the sling Logan did ok..... until he wanted to be held or to nurse. Sometimes I could set the baby down and hold Logan but there was a day when the baby needed to be rocked and bounced and Logan needed to nurse (naptime for him). If I stopped bouncing the baby (while walking around) he would start to scream. And Logan needed me so he would scream if I couldn't hold him. I had to put baby first and try to take care of Logan without holding him at least while I got baby calmed and Logan screamed for about 5 minutes to the point of almost hyperventilating. He couldn't understand why I couldn't hold him like I always did. Eventually I was able to rock in my recliner w/ baby on my shoulder and Logan nursing in my lap. From that day forward whenever I watched my nephew I had my dad come over so he could help me w/ them. With 2 sets of hands it was a piece of cake but man... that experience really made an imprint for me. Logan just wasn't ready to share me and he had no way to grasp it yet.

All of what I said above are my personal feelings. I know that some people like close age gaps. But when I weighed my son's personality, my health, and my ability to effectively care for 2 kids, the logical choice for my situation was to wait. I am and will always be their main caregiver so my preferences come first <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-smile.gif" border="0">

Lastly - I don't know how long you planned to breastfeed for but keep in mind that if you are still breastfeeding when you decide to get pregnant again, you may not be able to on your own. I had my periods back for over a year before we TTC but I still wasn't fertile because nursing can cause a short luteal phase. The choices were either to wean Logan (not an option) or use progesterone. And if you had planned to nurse longer than a year, keep in mind that she very well could wean during your next pregnancy due to the drop in milk supply that almost always happens w/ pregnancy. Nursing may not be a factor for anyone else but it was for me.
 
K

Keepercjr

Guest
Christian

I knew I wanted 2 children (maybe 3 but DH says no). So after having the first it was just about waiting till the time was right for #2. I was in grad school so basically it was going to be dictated by when I was done with school. I ended up taking a break this summer for 2 years (medical leave) and will reassess it when time is up. Since I was on this break I decided that now was the right time. I was terrified of having kids closer than 2 years apart but even 2 years was way too close for me. Logan is a very intense child and still needs my undivided attention. And I'm so glad they weren't 2 years apart. I knew people who have kids Logan's age and were on #2 when they turned 2 and I saw how hard it was for them. They managed but I figured there has to be an easier way. So I decided that they should be around 3 years apart and when #2 arrives they'll be 3.5 years exactly.

I am still really scared at the thought of taking care of 2 children. But I figured that I'll always be scared and I can't let fear dictate what I want in life. I'm scared of having to go into the hospital for something out of my control (like preterm labor) even though I have no risk factors. I just don't want to be forcefully separated from Logan who has never spent a night away from my side. I don't want some future sibling that isn't even here yet (and until recently was only a though) mess things up for the child who is already here (if that makes sense). For example, I was not willing to wean him to get pregnant or if I had some risk factor that would make it necessary to spend part of my pregnancy in the hospital then there is a good chance that I would not have had another, we would have adopted, or I would have waited MUCH longer to get pregnant again.

If Logan was a more laid back baby or toddler then maybe I would have felt comfortable having kids closer in age but it wouldn't have mattered anyway because of the school issue. We basically started trying as soon as I finalized my break. I'm still nervous at how he'll react when the new baby comes but I have much hope that he'll be a great big brother.

Oh one of the things that really settled it for me that I didn't want them close together is when I took care of my nephew for a few days a week when Logan was 18 months old. As long as I had the baby in the sling Logan did ok..... until he wanted to be held or to nurse. Sometimes I could set the baby down and hold Logan but there was a day when the baby needed to be rocked and bounced and Logan needed to nurse (naptime for him). If I stopped bouncing the baby (while walking around) he would start to scream. And Logan needed me so he would scream if I couldn't hold him. I had to put baby first and try to take care of Logan without holding him at least while I got baby calmed and Logan screamed for about 5 minutes to the point of almost hyperventilating. He couldn't understand why I couldn't hold him like I always did. Eventually I was able to rock in my recliner w/ baby on my shoulder and Logan nursing in my lap. From that day forward whenever I watched my nephew I had my dad come over so he could help me w/ them. With 2 sets of hands it was a piece of cake but man... that experience really made an imprint for me. Logan just wasn't ready to share me and he had no way to grasp it yet.

All of what I said above are my personal feelings. I know that some people like close age gaps. But when I weighed my son's personality, my health, and my ability to effectively care for 2 kids, the logical choice for my situation was to wait. I am and will always be their main caregiver so my preferences come first <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-smile.gif" border="0">

Lastly - I don't know how long you planned to breastfeed for but keep in mind that if you are still breastfeeding when you decide to get pregnant again, you may not be able to on your own. I had my periods back for over a year before we TTC but I still wasn't fertile because nursing can cause a short luteal phase. The choices were either to wean Logan (not an option) or use progesterone. And if you had planned to nurse longer than a year, keep in mind that she very well could wean during your next pregnancy due to the drop in milk supply that almost always happens w/ pregnancy. Nursing may not be a factor for anyone else but it was for me.
 
F

fondreflections

New member
Christian,

Please don't take this the wrong way...

I keep reading about how you want to get pregnant next summer...Hun, I have been trying for 2 years!!! All I'm trying to say is if it doesn't happen for you right away, like the first time, you will get so hurt. I'm not saying that you won't get pregnant right away. You did the first time, but if not you will be crushed. I thought that 2 years ago with my normal cycles and still nothing. I have been crushed lots. I keep rereading your post and your are already planning next summer...

Please don't take me wrong...I know you would be a great second-time Mom. I totally support your decision. You know that. I just don't agree with the whole "plan" thing because getting let down sucks...

Jenny <img src="i/expressions/heart.gif" border="0">
 
F

fondreflections

New member
Christian,

Please don't take this the wrong way...

I keep reading about how you want to get pregnant next summer...Hun, I have been trying for 2 years!!! All I'm trying to say is if it doesn't happen for you right away, like the first time, you will get so hurt. I'm not saying that you won't get pregnant right away. You did the first time, but if not you will be crushed. I thought that 2 years ago with my normal cycles and still nothing. I have been crushed lots. I keep rereading your post and your are already planning next summer...

Please don't take me wrong...I know you would be a great second-time Mom. I totally support your decision. You know that. I just don't agree with the whole "plan" thing because getting let down sucks...

Jenny <img src="i/expressions/heart.gif" border="0">
 
F

fondreflections

New member
Christian,

Please don't take this the wrong way...

I keep reading about how you want to get pregnant next summer...Hun, I have been trying for 2 years!!! All I'm trying to say is if it doesn't happen for you right away, like the first time, you will get so hurt. I'm not saying that you won't get pregnant right away. You did the first time, but if not you will be crushed. I thought that 2 years ago with my normal cycles and still nothing. I have been crushed lots. I keep rereading your post and your are already planning next summer...

Please don't take me wrong...I know you would be a great second-time Mom. I totally support your decision. You know that. I just don't agree with the whole "plan" thing because getting let down sucks...

Jenny <img src="i/expressions/heart.gif" border="0">
 
F

fondreflections

New member
Christian,

Please don't take this the wrong way...

I keep reading about how you want to get pregnant next summer...Hun, I have been trying for 2 years!!! All I'm trying to say is if it doesn't happen for you right away, like the first time, you will get so hurt. I'm not saying that you won't get pregnant right away. You did the first time, but if not you will be crushed. I thought that 2 years ago with my normal cycles and still nothing. I have been crushed lots. I keep rereading your post and your are already planning next summer...

Please don't take me wrong...I know you would be a great second-time Mom. I totally support your decision. You know that. I just don't agree with the whole "plan" thing because getting let down sucks...

Jenny <img src="i/expressions/heart.gif" border="0">
 
F

fondreflections

New member
Christian,

Please don't take this the wrong way...

I keep reading about how you want to get pregnant next summer...Hun, I have been trying for 2 years!!! All I'm trying to say is if it doesn't happen for you right away, like the first time, you will get so hurt. I'm not saying that you won't get pregnant right away. You did the first time, but if not you will be crushed. I thought that 2 years ago with my normal cycles and still nothing. I have been crushed lots. I keep rereading your post and your are already planning next summer...

Please don't take me wrong...I know you would be a great second-time Mom. I totally support your decision. You know that. I just don't agree with the whole "plan" thing because getting let down sucks...

Jenny <img src="i/expressions/heart.gif" border="0">
 
W

wanderlost

New member
Well, when I had my son I was 22. I finished collge when he turned one. He was unexpected - a delight, but an unexpected one. I was very much in a state of denial about my Cf (as I can see retrospectively) but in relatively good health.

My husband and I decided to have another baby in 2004, and it took us almost 18 months to concieve - we never thought we would have any trouble.

the birth of our daughter brought many things to light. The first one being that I began becoming very proactive with my CF care - I got a nebulizer and a vest - two things i had never done before. This is where I think you are as far as the fact that you are very proactive in your care.

So at first I thought we might have three kids. It seemed like a good idea for a while, But now, I'm not so sure. Here is my reasoning (and though I am talking three, I think it could equate for two)

1) at some point, dh would like me to go back to work. It is very hard for me to imagine doing treatments and getting ready for work while getting two kids ready and off to school and daycare - and then coming hoemn and doing evening treatments while getting two kids ready for bed/homework/dinner. My husbadn helps, but I would do most the work, due to his job. I have a hard enough time getting them in now, and I am home.

2) I don't think I could formula feed any of my kids (I did give my son formula, but I actually feel pretty bad about it). I am at the cusp of having lost too much weight - I am sure a lot from breastfeeding. I know I could amend this if I was willing to drink some shakes and eat better/more - I am not doing those things right now since I am still at a normal and healthy weight for myself, but I imagine breastfeeding another or breastfeeding through a pregnancy and then tandem nursing, and it worries me a bit. I don't want to start something I can't finish, if that makes sense.

3) I do have an awareness of Cf as a progressive disease, more now than I ever did before, and sionce I am already 30 - if it were to take us another 18 months of get pregnant, 9 to incubate, etc, it just seems I would be pushing time and testing fate.

All that being said, those are my own feelings. I completley understand your desire to have another baby. I think weighing it out is a good idea, but I also think we can tend to over analyze things, whereas, maybe letting what will be be might be a better approach. I'm not sure when you're talking about creating new life.

You're in good health, you're still young. You know your body can handle pregnancy, birth and breastfeeding. I don't think waiting a year or two would make much difference; I'd more think that rushing into two kids in a race against the proverbial clock might actually be more detrimental to your health. Imagine being able to take Vienna to nursery school for a few hours alone with a baby, versus having two nursing kids in diapers running around! Oy!

Good luck in whatever you decide. (((HUGS)))
 
W

wanderlost

New member
Well, when I had my son I was 22. I finished collge when he turned one. He was unexpected - a delight, but an unexpected one. I was very much in a state of denial about my Cf (as I can see retrospectively) but in relatively good health.

My husband and I decided to have another baby in 2004, and it took us almost 18 months to concieve - we never thought we would have any trouble.

the birth of our daughter brought many things to light. The first one being that I began becoming very proactive with my CF care - I got a nebulizer and a vest - two things i had never done before. This is where I think you are as far as the fact that you are very proactive in your care.

So at first I thought we might have three kids. It seemed like a good idea for a while, But now, I'm not so sure. Here is my reasoning (and though I am talking three, I think it could equate for two)

1) at some point, dh would like me to go back to work. It is very hard for me to imagine doing treatments and getting ready for work while getting two kids ready and off to school and daycare - and then coming hoemn and doing evening treatments while getting two kids ready for bed/homework/dinner. My husbadn helps, but I would do most the work, due to his job. I have a hard enough time getting them in now, and I am home.

2) I don't think I could formula feed any of my kids (I did give my son formula, but I actually feel pretty bad about it). I am at the cusp of having lost too much weight - I am sure a lot from breastfeeding. I know I could amend this if I was willing to drink some shakes and eat better/more - I am not doing those things right now since I am still at a normal and healthy weight for myself, but I imagine breastfeeding another or breastfeeding through a pregnancy and then tandem nursing, and it worries me a bit. I don't want to start something I can't finish, if that makes sense.

3) I do have an awareness of Cf as a progressive disease, more now than I ever did before, and sionce I am already 30 - if it were to take us another 18 months of get pregnant, 9 to incubate, etc, it just seems I would be pushing time and testing fate.

All that being said, those are my own feelings. I completley understand your desire to have another baby. I think weighing it out is a good idea, but I also think we can tend to over analyze things, whereas, maybe letting what will be be might be a better approach. I'm not sure when you're talking about creating new life.

You're in good health, you're still young. You know your body can handle pregnancy, birth and breastfeeding. I don't think waiting a year or two would make much difference; I'd more think that rushing into two kids in a race against the proverbial clock might actually be more detrimental to your health. Imagine being able to take Vienna to nursery school for a few hours alone with a baby, versus having two nursing kids in diapers running around! Oy!

Good luck in whatever you decide. (((HUGS)))
 
W

wanderlost

New member
Well, when I had my son I was 22. I finished collge when he turned one. He was unexpected - a delight, but an unexpected one. I was very much in a state of denial about my Cf (as I can see retrospectively) but in relatively good health.

My husband and I decided to have another baby in 2004, and it took us almost 18 months to concieve - we never thought we would have any trouble.

the birth of our daughter brought many things to light. The first one being that I began becoming very proactive with my CF care - I got a nebulizer and a vest - two things i had never done before. This is where I think you are as far as the fact that you are very proactive in your care.

So at first I thought we might have three kids. It seemed like a good idea for a while, But now, I'm not so sure. Here is my reasoning (and though I am talking three, I think it could equate for two)

1) at some point, dh would like me to go back to work. It is very hard for me to imagine doing treatments and getting ready for work while getting two kids ready and off to school and daycare - and then coming hoemn and doing evening treatments while getting two kids ready for bed/homework/dinner. My husbadn helps, but I would do most the work, due to his job. I have a hard enough time getting them in now, and I am home.

2) I don't think I could formula feed any of my kids (I did give my son formula, but I actually feel pretty bad about it). I am at the cusp of having lost too much weight - I am sure a lot from breastfeeding. I know I could amend this if I was willing to drink some shakes and eat better/more - I am not doing those things right now since I am still at a normal and healthy weight for myself, but I imagine breastfeeding another or breastfeeding through a pregnancy and then tandem nursing, and it worries me a bit. I don't want to start something I can't finish, if that makes sense.

3) I do have an awareness of Cf as a progressive disease, more now than I ever did before, and sionce I am already 30 - if it were to take us another 18 months of get pregnant, 9 to incubate, etc, it just seems I would be pushing time and testing fate.

All that being said, those are my own feelings. I completley understand your desire to have another baby. I think weighing it out is a good idea, but I also think we can tend to over analyze things, whereas, maybe letting what will be be might be a better approach. I'm not sure when you're talking about creating new life.

You're in good health, you're still young. You know your body can handle pregnancy, birth and breastfeeding. I don't think waiting a year or two would make much difference; I'd more think that rushing into two kids in a race against the proverbial clock might actually be more detrimental to your health. Imagine being able to take Vienna to nursery school for a few hours alone with a baby, versus having two nursing kids in diapers running around! Oy!

Good luck in whatever you decide. (((HUGS)))
 
W

wanderlost

New member
Well, when I had my son I was 22. I finished collge when he turned one. He was unexpected - a delight, but an unexpected one. I was very much in a state of denial about my Cf (as I can see retrospectively) but in relatively good health.

My husband and I decided to have another baby in 2004, and it took us almost 18 months to concieve - we never thought we would have any trouble.

the birth of our daughter brought many things to light. The first one being that I began becoming very proactive with my CF care - I got a nebulizer and a vest - two things i had never done before. This is where I think you are as far as the fact that you are very proactive in your care.

So at first I thought we might have three kids. It seemed like a good idea for a while, But now, I'm not so sure. Here is my reasoning (and though I am talking three, I think it could equate for two)

1) at some point, dh would like me to go back to work. It is very hard for me to imagine doing treatments and getting ready for work while getting two kids ready and off to school and daycare - and then coming hoemn and doing evening treatments while getting two kids ready for bed/homework/dinner. My husbadn helps, but I would do most the work, due to his job. I have a hard enough time getting them in now, and I am home.

2) I don't think I could formula feed any of my kids (I did give my son formula, but I actually feel pretty bad about it). I am at the cusp of having lost too much weight - I am sure a lot from breastfeeding. I know I could amend this if I was willing to drink some shakes and eat better/more - I am not doing those things right now since I am still at a normal and healthy weight for myself, but I imagine breastfeeding another or breastfeeding through a pregnancy and then tandem nursing, and it worries me a bit. I don't want to start something I can't finish, if that makes sense.

3) I do have an awareness of Cf as a progressive disease, more now than I ever did before, and sionce I am already 30 - if it were to take us another 18 months of get pregnant, 9 to incubate, etc, it just seems I would be pushing time and testing fate.

All that being said, those are my own feelings. I completley understand your desire to have another baby. I think weighing it out is a good idea, but I also think we can tend to over analyze things, whereas, maybe letting what will be be might be a better approach. I'm not sure when you're talking about creating new life.

You're in good health, you're still young. You know your body can handle pregnancy, birth and breastfeeding. I don't think waiting a year or two would make much difference; I'd more think that rushing into two kids in a race against the proverbial clock might actually be more detrimental to your health. Imagine being able to take Vienna to nursery school for a few hours alone with a baby, versus having two nursing kids in diapers running around! Oy!

Good luck in whatever you decide. (((HUGS)))
 
W

wanderlost

New member
Well, when I had my son I was 22. I finished collge when he turned one. He was unexpected - a delight, but an unexpected one. I was very much in a state of denial about my Cf (as I can see retrospectively) but in relatively good health.

My husband and I decided to have another baby in 2004, and it took us almost 18 months to concieve - we never thought we would have any trouble.

the birth of our daughter brought many things to light. The first one being that I began becoming very proactive with my CF care - I got a nebulizer and a vest - two things i had never done before. This is where I think you are as far as the fact that you are very proactive in your care.

So at first I thought we might have three kids. It seemed like a good idea for a while, But now, I'm not so sure. Here is my reasoning (and though I am talking three, I think it could equate for two)

1) at some point, dh would like me to go back to work. It is very hard for me to imagine doing treatments and getting ready for work while getting two kids ready and off to school and daycare - and then coming hoemn and doing evening treatments while getting two kids ready for bed/homework/dinner. My husbadn helps, but I would do most the work, due to his job. I have a hard enough time getting them in now, and I am home.

2) I don't think I could formula feed any of my kids (I did give my son formula, but I actually feel pretty bad about it). I am at the cusp of having lost too much weight - I am sure a lot from breastfeeding. I know I could amend this if I was willing to drink some shakes and eat better/more - I am not doing those things right now since I am still at a normal and healthy weight for myself, but I imagine breastfeeding another or breastfeeding through a pregnancy and then tandem nursing, and it worries me a bit. I don't want to start something I can't finish, if that makes sense.

3) I do have an awareness of Cf as a progressive disease, more now than I ever did before, and sionce I am already 30 - if it were to take us another 18 months of get pregnant, 9 to incubate, etc, it just seems I would be pushing time and testing fate.

All that being said, those are my own feelings. I completley understand your desire to have another baby. I think weighing it out is a good idea, but I also think we can tend to over analyze things, whereas, maybe letting what will be be might be a better approach. I'm not sure when you're talking about creating new life.

You're in good health, you're still young. You know your body can handle pregnancy, birth and breastfeeding. I don't think waiting a year or two would make much difference; I'd more think that rushing into two kids in a race against the proverbial clock might actually be more detrimental to your health. Imagine being able to take Vienna to nursery school for a few hours alone with a baby, versus having two nursing kids in diapers running around! Oy!

Good luck in whatever you decide. (((HUGS)))
 
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