Dying...

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skh

Guest
I do tend to think about death. But I always thought that was because I was a parent and just a part of the worrying you do regarding your kids. I don't think about mine as much as I do about what I would do if my husband or one of my children would die. I know they will manage without me but what would I do without them? I hope I don't have to answer that any time soon. I do believe in trying to live for the moment and enjoying my loved ones as much as I can now but I am not always good at doing this.

Sue
 
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skh

Guest
I do tend to think about death. But I always thought that was because I was a parent and just a part of the worrying you do regarding your kids. I don't think about mine as much as I do about what I would do if my husband or one of my children would die. I know they will manage without me but what would I do without them? I hope I don't have to answer that any time soon. I do believe in trying to live for the moment and enjoying my loved ones as much as I can now but I am not always good at doing this.

Sue
 
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princessjdc

New member
Same here, I always worry about my loved ones too. I too think about how it will be for me and how sad it will be for my family, but in a way Im a little scared of death, but I know when it comes I wont be so afraid, I will probably be more accepting of it.
 
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princessjdc

New member
Same here, I always worry about my loved ones too. I too think about how it will be for me and how sad it will be for my family, but in a way Im a little scared of death, but I know when it comes I wont be so afraid, I will probably be more accepting of it.
 
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littledebbie

New member
Allie very graciously answered a few questions for me and put the last few worries I had to rest. I already talk to my Mom about it quite regularly and my Dad a little. I'm not too scared and sometimes I think I'm looking forward to it <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-wink.gif" border="0"> just for the relief. Mostly I'm sad when I think of how sad my family will be. I try to let them know I will be fine when it happens, I have no real regrets and I love them etc. For me talking about it with them helps a little, it makes me feel less alone with it, and I know my Mom must think of it too so we might as well support each other through this. Sometimes we even get to having a pretty good laugh when it comes to funeral plans, we're a morbid pair that way....as I've notice a few others on here are...he he he

It's also very important to me that I don't die in the hospital and certainly not on a vent, if I go fast with a heart attack etc. fine, if I slowly go in and out of sleep fine, but you better believe I will not being taking my last breath is some "expletive" hospital. That's another reason I talk to my Mom about it, someone has to know what I want...I'm a little bossy and I want to be the boss about my death too, afterall it's my last big bossy opportunity.
 
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littledebbie

New member
Allie very graciously answered a few questions for me and put the last few worries I had to rest. I already talk to my Mom about it quite regularly and my Dad a little. I'm not too scared and sometimes I think I'm looking forward to it <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-wink.gif" border="0"> just for the relief. Mostly I'm sad when I think of how sad my family will be. I try to let them know I will be fine when it happens, I have no real regrets and I love them etc. For me talking about it with them helps a little, it makes me feel less alone with it, and I know my Mom must think of it too so we might as well support each other through this. Sometimes we even get to having a pretty good laugh when it comes to funeral plans, we're a morbid pair that way....as I've notice a few others on here are...he he he

It's also very important to me that I don't die in the hospital and certainly not on a vent, if I go fast with a heart attack etc. fine, if I slowly go in and out of sleep fine, but you better believe I will not being taking my last breath is some "expletive" hospital. That's another reason I talk to my Mom about it, someone has to know what I want...I'm a little bossy and I want to be the boss about my death too, afterall it's my last big bossy opportunity.
 
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anonymous

New member
This is a hard question. Rip used to ask about this--wanted to know how someone with bronichiectasis died -- and yet didn't too.
He searched the web on "palliative care" and "respiratory failure" and found out some stuff. Seemed that morphine for shortness of breath at the end really made the whole thing sort of peaceful. But one can die of complications from the resistent bugs too. His MRSA got in his blood stream and he died of sepsis. Still they were able to keep him really comfortable and he died a really peaceful death--as peacefule as my parents' deaths of old age in their 90s. I will never forget the love in his eyes as we looked at each other that last hour.
 
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anonymous

New member
This is a hard question. Rip used to ask about this--wanted to know how someone with bronichiectasis died -- and yet didn't too.
He searched the web on "palliative care" and "respiratory failure" and found out some stuff. Seemed that morphine for shortness of breath at the end really made the whole thing sort of peaceful. But one can die of complications from the resistent bugs too. His MRSA got in his blood stream and he died of sepsis. Still they were able to keep him really comfortable and he died a really peaceful death--as peacefule as my parents' deaths of old age in their 90s. I will never forget the love in his eyes as we looked at each other that last hour.
 
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thelizardqueen

New member
I worry that I'll be in so much "pain" that I'll have to go on morphine - or something like it. I don't want to be "high" during my last few minutes alive. I want to be able to look around at the people with me, and recognize them, and tell them I love them. I think out of all the people in my life that I'm terrified of leaving behind, its my mum, stepdad & boyfriend. Its not so much leaving them behind, and them continueing on without me, but rather them being devestated that this is the last time they'll see me. Its not how I feel that bothers me, but how they will feel.
 
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thelizardqueen

New member
I worry that I'll be in so much "pain" that I'll have to go on morphine - or something like it. I don't want to be "high" during my last few minutes alive. I want to be able to look around at the people with me, and recognize them, and tell them I love them. I think out of all the people in my life that I'm terrified of leaving behind, its my mum, stepdad & boyfriend. Its not so much leaving them behind, and them continueing on without me, but rather them being devestated that this is the last time they'll see me. Its not how I feel that bothers me, but how they will feel.
 
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Allie

New member
Lisa, it was the same way for me. As far as last looks go, I don't think there was any stronger comfort to me than the look in my Ry's eyes the last time he opened them. I was scared that he'd be scared or pain, but all I saw was love and peace, and a slight amount of amusement. It wasn't what I expected at all. When I slip into thinking I didn't do enough, I remember that last look of his.

Liz, they slowly increase the dose of morphine to make sure that you aren't breathless, and breathlessness requires less morphine to control it than pain. Ry wasn't ever stoned out of his mind by the morphine, he was slightly confused from the co2 overload, but the morphine didn't make him "out of it". He and I spoke briefly a few hours before he passed away, and he was confused as far as the date and time, but otherwise knew who I was, what was going on, etc. He was drowsy, but that was from the co2 again. Don't worry about it too much.
 
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Allie

New member
Lisa, it was the same way for me. As far as last looks go, I don't think there was any stronger comfort to me than the look in my Ry's eyes the last time he opened them. I was scared that he'd be scared or pain, but all I saw was love and peace, and a slight amount of amusement. It wasn't what I expected at all. When I slip into thinking I didn't do enough, I remember that last look of his.

Liz, they slowly increase the dose of morphine to make sure that you aren't breathless, and breathlessness requires less morphine to control it than pain. Ry wasn't ever stoned out of his mind by the morphine, he was slightly confused from the co2 overload, but the morphine didn't make him "out of it". He and I spoke briefly a few hours before he passed away, and he was confused as far as the date and time, but otherwise knew who I was, what was going on, etc. He was drowsy, but that was from the co2 again. Don't worry about it too much.
 
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anonymous

New member
I think about this a lot, prob. too much. I am not scared of death- I was actually almost there once (in October)- I ended up in the ICU with respitory faliure and I was in & out of it for about a day & 1/2- I really felt ok. I "saw" the light too, well sort -of..I was walking down a path and my memere came to me & told me to hang on. It scared the crap out of me. When I woke up there was a priest praying over me & my mom & brother hysterical.... I NEVER forget that moment I thought for sure I was gone and all I said was " I dont want to see dad yet (he died in 2002), Im going to fight" & I guess I kept saying it over and over. From what I remember it wasn't painful at all & I don't remember suffering like I thought I would. Somehow I pulled through and feeling pretty good these days. Im more concerned with leaving people behind- We already lost my dad to lung cancer when he was too young- I dont want to do this to my family & my finance, but I guess its the way its going to be someday.
 
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anonymous

New member
I think about this a lot, prob. too much. I am not scared of death- I was actually almost there once (in October)- I ended up in the ICU with respitory faliure and I was in & out of it for about a day & 1/2- I really felt ok. I "saw" the light too, well sort -of..I was walking down a path and my memere came to me & told me to hang on. It scared the crap out of me. When I woke up there was a priest praying over me & my mom & brother hysterical.... I NEVER forget that moment I thought for sure I was gone and all I said was " I dont want to see dad yet (he died in 2002), Im going to fight" & I guess I kept saying it over and over. From what I remember it wasn't painful at all & I don't remember suffering like I thought I would. Somehow I pulled through and feeling pretty good these days. Im more concerned with leaving people behind- We already lost my dad to lung cancer when he was too young- I dont want to do this to my family & my finance, but I guess its the way its going to be someday.
 
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thelizardqueen

New member
Large doses of Morphine makes me throw up. I would hope that the smaller doses wouldn't cause this same problem. As a child I was in couseling for awhile because death was a huge issue for me. Death doesn't frighten me as much as when I was a child, but I am still scared to an extent.
 
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thelizardqueen

New member
Large doses of Morphine makes me throw up. I would hope that the smaller doses wouldn't cause this same problem. As a child I was in couseling for awhile because death was a huge issue for me. Death doesn't frighten me as much as when I was a child, but I am still scared to an extent.
 
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EB24

New member
Anyone ever notice when you say something about death or dying, people whisper. Like if nobody hears them, it isn't real. My granddad is like that. He'll know someone who passed away and say, now you know(gets extremely quiet) John Doe passed away. I have always wondered why he does that, but now I always say Huh speak up I can't hear you.
 
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EB24

New member
Anyone ever notice when you say something about death or dying, people whisper. Like if nobody hears them, it isn't real. My granddad is like that. He'll know someone who passed away and say, now you know(gets extremely quiet) John Doe passed away. I have always wondered why he does that, but now I always say Huh speak up I can't hear you.
 
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