<img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-sad.gif" border="0"> I'm sorry everyone, I appreciate everyones help and support but I don't think I can do it, I'm too scared of feeling more like a freak then I already do, I don't want my life to be lived on some tube, I just want to be normal for whatever life I have left. I've already been rejected by enough of the opposite sex because I have CF, I couldn't bare it with a tube, I don't want to be that kind of disabled. I really just want to die. I don't know how to make this okay in my mind. I'm so sorry.
G-tube help/advice/support
- Thread starter annieop86
- Start date
<img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-sad.gif" border="0"> I'm sorry everyone, I appreciate everyones help and support but I don't think I can do it, I'm too scared of feeling more like a freak then I already do, I don't want my life to be lived on some tube, I just want to be normal for whatever life I have left. I've already been rejected by enough of the opposite sex because I have CF, I couldn't bare it with a tube, I don't want to be that kind of disabled. I really just want to die. I don't know how to make this okay in my mind. I'm so sorry.
<img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-sad.gif" border="0"> I'm sorry everyone, I appreciate everyones help and support but I don't think I can do it, I'm too scared of feeling more like a freak then I already do, I don't want my life to be lived on some tube, I just want to be normal for whatever life I have left. I've already been rejected by enough of the opposite sex because I have CF, I couldn't bare it with a tube, I don't want to be that kind of disabled. I really just want to die. I don't know how to make this okay in my mind. I'm so sorry.
<img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-sad.gif" border="0"> I'm sorry everyone, I appreciate everyones help and support but I don't think I can do it, I'm too scared of feeling more like a freak then I already do, I don't want my life to be lived on some tube, I just want to be normal for whatever life I have left. I've already been rejected by enough of the opposite sex because I have CF, I couldn't bare it with a tube, I don't want to be that kind of disabled. I really just want to die. I don't know how to make this okay in my mind. I'm so sorry.
<img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-sad.gif" border="0"> I'm sorry everyone, I appreciate everyones help and support but I don't think I can do it, I'm too scared of feeling more like a freak then I already do, I don't want my life to be lived on some tube, I just want to be normal for whatever life I have left. I've already been rejected by enough of the opposite sex because I have CF, I couldn't bare it with a tube, I don't want to be that kind of disabled. I really just want to die. I don't know how to make this okay in my mind. I'm so sorry.
Playswithpixels
New member
I had a feeding tube (Mic-Key) for about two years. I had it put in the same time as my port, around 1996. It was a difficult decision, one that left me with poor body image (temporarily) and feeling bad about how far I'd let this disease take me down. However, the fact that I was 20 years old, 5'4" and 98 Lbs,meant that without these "accessories" I probably wouldn't be here right now. My FEV1 at the time was in the 30's (I think). Your lungs need energy to fight infection, calories = energy, and at the time I wasn't getting enough. What really turned things around was exercise. I started going to the gym at this same time and because of weight training and the extra calories from the tube feeding I put on 29 Lbs in about a year. I stopped the feeding after a year and a half and maintained the weight on my own, then my Doctor allowed me to get it removed with the promise that if I needed it again I wouldn't argue with him 
So far 10 years later I still weigh 127 or so and am able to maintain it without much difficulty. BTW, my FEV1 increased to the mid 40's with the tube feedings.
I definitely encourage you to do what you have to to get the calories your body needs to give your lungs a fighting chance. Also exercise, this not only will increase your appetite it will help you gain muscle, a plus when it comes to gaining weight. Weight training also helps fight off diabetes, by teaching your body to be more efficient with insulin. You'll feel better about yourself, and have more energy. Don't forget cardio training, this will increase you endurance. Someday you will not need the tube, but you'll be glad you got it when you needed it.
As far as sex and feeling sexy, I agree it is hard to feel sexy when you look like a beach ball valve is sticking out of your tummy, but how sexy can a person feel when they look like a walking skeleton? I filled out nicely according to my hubby, I grew curves....LOL. He says I look better now, than when we got married. My hubby always thinks I am sexy, even when I am lying in a hospital bed with no make-up on, smoking a neb, and coughing my brains out....maybe he is twisted? After 14 yrs I don't argue with him, let him think what he wants If someone loves you, they will accept what ever you have to do to fight this disease.
Yes, you should try to eat enough, but sometimes it is immpossible for a human to consume the calories that CF requires. Don't think of a feeding tube as admitting defeat, you are actually fighting back when you get one. Okay...I'll get off my soap box now
Andrea 32 w/CF /F507 & F508 / DX 8 mos. old.
So far 10 years later I still weigh 127 or so and am able to maintain it without much difficulty. BTW, my FEV1 increased to the mid 40's with the tube feedings. I definitely encourage you to do what you have to to get the calories your body needs to give your lungs a fighting chance. Also exercise, this not only will increase your appetite it will help you gain muscle, a plus when it comes to gaining weight. Weight training also helps fight off diabetes, by teaching your body to be more efficient with insulin. You'll feel better about yourself, and have more energy. Don't forget cardio training, this will increase you endurance. Someday you will not need the tube, but you'll be glad you got it when you needed it.
As far as sex and feeling sexy, I agree it is hard to feel sexy when you look like a beach ball valve is sticking out of your tummy, but how sexy can a person feel when they look like a walking skeleton? I filled out nicely according to my hubby, I grew curves....LOL. He says I look better now, than when we got married. My hubby always thinks I am sexy, even when I am lying in a hospital bed with no make-up on, smoking a neb, and coughing my brains out....maybe he is twisted? After 14 yrs I don't argue with him, let him think what he wants
If someone loves you, they will accept what ever you have to do to fight this disease. Yes, you should try to eat enough, but sometimes it is immpossible for a human to consume the calories that CF requires. Don't think of a feeding tube as admitting defeat, you are actually fighting back when you get one. Okay...I'll get off my soap box now
Andrea 32 w/CF /F507 & F508 / DX 8 mos. old.
Playswithpixels
New member
I had a feeding tube (Mic-Key) for about two years. I had it put in the same time as my port, around 1996. It was a difficult decision, one that left me with poor body image (temporarily) and feeling bad about how far I'd let this disease take me down. However, the fact that I was 20 years old, 5'4" and 98 Lbs,meant that without these "accessories" I probably wouldn't be here right now. My FEV1 at the time was in the 30's (I think). Your lungs need energy to fight infection, calories = energy, and at the time I wasn't getting enough. What really turned things around was exercise. I started going to the gym at this same time and because of weight training and the extra calories from the tube feeding I put on 29 Lbs in about a year. I stopped the feeding after a year and a half and maintained the weight on my own, then my Doctor allowed me to get it removed with the promise that if I needed it again I wouldn't argue with him So far 10 years later I still weigh 127 or so and am able to maintain it without much difficulty. BTW, my FEV1 increased to the mid 40's with the tube feedings.
I definitely encourage you to do what you have to to get the calories your body needs to give your lungs a fighting chance. Also exercise, this not only will increase your appetite it will help you gain muscle, a plus when it comes to gaining weight. Weight training also helps fight off diabetes, by teaching your body to be more efficient with insulin. You'll feel better about yourself, and have more energy. Don't forget cardio training, this will increase you endurance. Someday you will not need the tube, but you'll be glad you got it when you needed it.
As far as sex and feeling sexy, I agree it is hard to feel sexy when you look like a beach ball valve is sticking out of your tummy, but how sexy can a person feel when they look like a walking skeleton? I filled out nicely according to my hubby, I grew curves....LOL. He says I look better now, than when we got married. My hubby always thinks I am sexy, even when I am lying in a hospital bed with no make-up on, smoking a neb, and coughing my brains out....maybe he is twisted? After 14 yrs I don't argue with him, let him think what he wants If someone loves you, they will accept what ever you have to do to fight this disease.
Yes, you should try to eat enough, but sometimes it is immpossible for a human to consume the calories that CF requires. Don't think of a feeding tube as admitting defeat, you are actually fighting back when you get one. Okay...I'll get off my soap box now
Andrea 32 w/CF /F507 & F508 / DX 8 mos. old.
So far 10 years later I still weigh 127 or so and am able to maintain it without much difficulty. BTW, my FEV1 increased to the mid 40's with the tube feedings. I definitely encourage you to do what you have to to get the calories your body needs to give your lungs a fighting chance. Also exercise, this not only will increase your appetite it will help you gain muscle, a plus when it comes to gaining weight. Weight training also helps fight off diabetes, by teaching your body to be more efficient with insulin. You'll feel better about yourself, and have more energy. Don't forget cardio training, this will increase you endurance. Someday you will not need the tube, but you'll be glad you got it when you needed it.
As far as sex and feeling sexy, I agree it is hard to feel sexy when you look like a beach ball valve is sticking out of your tummy, but how sexy can a person feel when they look like a walking skeleton? I filled out nicely according to my hubby, I grew curves....LOL. He says I look better now, than when we got married. My hubby always thinks I am sexy, even when I am lying in a hospital bed with no make-up on, smoking a neb, and coughing my brains out....maybe he is twisted? After 14 yrs I don't argue with him, let him think what he wants
If someone loves you, they will accept what ever you have to do to fight this disease. Yes, you should try to eat enough, but sometimes it is immpossible for a human to consume the calories that CF requires. Don't think of a feeding tube as admitting defeat, you are actually fighting back when you get one. Okay...I'll get off my soap box now
Andrea 32 w/CF /F507 & F508 / DX 8 mos. old.
Playswithpixels
New member
I had a feeding tube (Mic-Key) for about two years. I had it put in the same time as my port, around 1996. It was a difficult decision, one that left me with poor body image (temporarily) and feeling bad about how far I'd let this disease take me down. However, the fact that I was 20 years old, 5'4" and 98 Lbs,meant that without these "accessories" I probably wouldn't be here right now. My FEV1 at the time was in the 30's (I think). Your lungs need energy to fight infection, calories = energy, and at the time I wasn't getting enough. What really turned things around was exercise. I started going to the gym at this same time and because of weight training and the extra calories from the tube feeding I put on 29 Lbs in about a year. I stopped the feeding after a year and a half and maintained the weight on my own, then my Doctor allowed me to get it removed with the promise that if I needed it again I wouldn't argue with him So far 10 years later I still weigh 127 or so and am able to maintain it without much difficulty. BTW, my FEV1 increased to the mid 40's with the tube feedings.
I definitely encourage you to do what you have to to get the calories your body needs to give your lungs a fighting chance. Also exercise, this not only will increase your appetite it will help you gain muscle, a plus when it comes to gaining weight. Weight training also helps fight off diabetes, by teaching your body to be more efficient with insulin. You'll feel better about yourself, and have more energy. Don't forget cardio training, this will increase you endurance. Someday you will not need the tube, but you'll be glad you got it when you needed it.
As far as sex and feeling sexy, I agree it is hard to feel sexy when you look like a beach ball valve is sticking out of your tummy, but how sexy can a person feel when they look like a walking skeleton? I filled out nicely according to my hubby, I grew curves....LOL. He says I look better now, than when we got married. My hubby always thinks I am sexy, even when I am lying in a hospital bed with no make-up on, smoking a neb, and coughing my brains out....maybe he is twisted? After 14 yrs I don't argue with him, let him think what he wants If someone loves you, they will accept what ever you have to do to fight this disease.
Yes, you should try to eat enough, but sometimes it is immpossible for a human to consume the calories that CF requires. Don't think of a feeding tube as admitting defeat, you are actually fighting back when you get one. Okay...I'll get off my soap box now
Andrea 32 w/CF /F507 & F508 / DX 8 mos. old.
So far 10 years later I still weigh 127 or so and am able to maintain it without much difficulty. BTW, my FEV1 increased to the mid 40's with the tube feedings. I definitely encourage you to do what you have to to get the calories your body needs to give your lungs a fighting chance. Also exercise, this not only will increase your appetite it will help you gain muscle, a plus when it comes to gaining weight. Weight training also helps fight off diabetes, by teaching your body to be more efficient with insulin. You'll feel better about yourself, and have more energy. Don't forget cardio training, this will increase you endurance. Someday you will not need the tube, but you'll be glad you got it when you needed it.
As far as sex and feeling sexy, I agree it is hard to feel sexy when you look like a beach ball valve is sticking out of your tummy, but how sexy can a person feel when they look like a walking skeleton? I filled out nicely according to my hubby, I grew curves....LOL. He says I look better now, than when we got married. My hubby always thinks I am sexy, even when I am lying in a hospital bed with no make-up on, smoking a neb, and coughing my brains out....maybe he is twisted? After 14 yrs I don't argue with him, let him think what he wants
If someone loves you, they will accept what ever you have to do to fight this disease. Yes, you should try to eat enough, but sometimes it is immpossible for a human to consume the calories that CF requires. Don't think of a feeding tube as admitting defeat, you are actually fighting back when you get one. Okay...I'll get off my soap box now
Andrea 32 w/CF /F507 & F508 / DX 8 mos. old.
Playswithpixels
New member
I had a feeding tube (Mic-Key) for about two years. I had it put in the same time as my port, around 1996. It was a difficult decision, one that left me with poor body image (temporarily) and feeling bad about how far I'd let this disease take me down. However, the fact that I was 20 years old, 5'4" and 98 Lbs,meant that without these "accessories" I probably wouldn't be here right now. My FEV1 at the time was in the 30's (I think). Your lungs need energy to fight infection, calories = energy, and at the time I wasn't getting enough. What really turned things around was exercise. I started going to the gym at this same time and because of weight training and the extra calories from the tube feeding I put on 29 Lbs in about a year. I stopped the feeding after a year and a half and maintained the weight on my own, then my Doctor allowed me to get it removed with the promise that if I needed it again I wouldn't argue with him So far 10 years later I still weigh 127 or so and am able to maintain it without much difficulty. BTW, my FEV1 increased to the mid 40's with the tube feedings.
I definitely encourage you to do what you have to to get the calories your body needs to give your lungs a fighting chance. Also exercise, this not only will increase your appetite it will help you gain muscle, a plus when it comes to gaining weight. Weight training also helps fight off diabetes, by teaching your body to be more efficient with insulin. You'll feel better about yourself, and have more energy. Don't forget cardio training, this will increase you endurance. Someday you will not need the tube, but you'll be glad you got it when you needed it.
As far as sex and feeling sexy, I agree it is hard to feel sexy when you look like a beach ball valve is sticking out of your tummy, but how sexy can a person feel when they look like a walking skeleton? I filled out nicely according to my hubby, I grew curves....LOL. He says I look better now, than when we got married. My hubby always thinks I am sexy, even when I am lying in a hospital bed with no make-up on, smoking a neb, and coughing my brains out....maybe he is twisted? After 14 yrs I don't argue with him, let him think what he wants If someone loves you, they will accept what ever you have to do to fight this disease.
Yes, you should try to eat enough, but sometimes it is immpossible for a human to consume the calories that CF requires. Don't think of a feeding tube as admitting defeat, you are actually fighting back when you get one. Okay...I'll get off my soap box now
Andrea 32 w/CF /F507 & F508 / DX 8 mos. old.
So far 10 years later I still weigh 127 or so and am able to maintain it without much difficulty. BTW, my FEV1 increased to the mid 40's with the tube feedings. I definitely encourage you to do what you have to to get the calories your body needs to give your lungs a fighting chance. Also exercise, this not only will increase your appetite it will help you gain muscle, a plus when it comes to gaining weight. Weight training also helps fight off diabetes, by teaching your body to be more efficient with insulin. You'll feel better about yourself, and have more energy. Don't forget cardio training, this will increase you endurance. Someday you will not need the tube, but you'll be glad you got it when you needed it.
As far as sex and feeling sexy, I agree it is hard to feel sexy when you look like a beach ball valve is sticking out of your tummy, but how sexy can a person feel when they look like a walking skeleton? I filled out nicely according to my hubby, I grew curves....LOL. He says I look better now, than when we got married. My hubby always thinks I am sexy, even when I am lying in a hospital bed with no make-up on, smoking a neb, and coughing my brains out....maybe he is twisted? After 14 yrs I don't argue with him, let him think what he wants
If someone loves you, they will accept what ever you have to do to fight this disease. Yes, you should try to eat enough, but sometimes it is immpossible for a human to consume the calories that CF requires. Don't think of a feeding tube as admitting defeat, you are actually fighting back when you get one. Okay...I'll get off my soap box now
Andrea 32 w/CF /F507 & F508 / DX 8 mos. old.
Playswithpixels
New member
I had a feeding tube (Mic-Key) for about two years. I had it put in the same time as my port, around 1996. It was a difficult decision, one that left me with poor body image (temporarily) and feeling bad about how far I'd let this disease take me down. However, the fact that I was 20 years old, 5'4" and 98 Lbs,meant that without these "accessories" I probably wouldn't be here right now. My FEV1 at the time was in the 30's (I think). Your lungs need energy to fight infection, calories = energy, and at the time I wasn't getting enough. What really turned things around was exercise. I started going to the gym at this same time and because of weight training and the extra calories from the tube feeding I put on 29 Lbs in about a year. I stopped the feeding after a year and a half and maintained the weight on my own, then my Doctor allowed me to get it removed with the promise that if I needed it again I wouldn't argue with him So far 10 years later I still weigh 127 or so and am able to maintain it without much difficulty. BTW, my FEV1 increased to the mid 40's with the tube feedings.
<br />
<br />I definitely encourage you to do what you have to to get the calories your body needs to give your lungs a fighting chance. Also exercise, this not only will increase your appetite it will help you gain muscle, a plus when it comes to gaining weight. Weight training also helps fight off diabetes, by teaching your body to be more efficient with insulin. You'll feel better about yourself, and have more energy. Don't forget cardio training, this will increase you endurance. Someday you will not need the tube, but you'll be glad you got it when you needed it.
<br />
<br />As far as sex and feeling sexy, I agree it is hard to feel sexy when you look like a beach ball valve is sticking out of your tummy, but how sexy can a person feel when they look like a walking skeleton? I filled out nicely according to my hubby, I grew curves....LOL. He says I look better now, than when we got married. My hubby always thinks I am sexy, even when I am lying in a hospital bed with no make-up on, smoking a neb, and coughing my brains out....maybe he is twisted? After 14 yrs I don't argue with him, let him think what he wants If someone loves you, they will accept what ever you have to do to fight this disease.
<br />
<br />Yes, you should try to eat enough, but sometimes it is immpossible for a human to consume the calories that CF requires. Don't think of a feeding tube as admitting defeat, you are actually fighting back when you get one. Okay...I'll get off my soap box now
<br />
<br />Andrea 32 w/CF /F507 & F508 / DX 8 mos. old.
So far 10 years later I still weigh 127 or so and am able to maintain it without much difficulty. BTW, my FEV1 increased to the mid 40's with the tube feedings. <br />
<br />I definitely encourage you to do what you have to to get the calories your body needs to give your lungs a fighting chance. Also exercise, this not only will increase your appetite it will help you gain muscle, a plus when it comes to gaining weight. Weight training also helps fight off diabetes, by teaching your body to be more efficient with insulin. You'll feel better about yourself, and have more energy. Don't forget cardio training, this will increase you endurance. Someday you will not need the tube, but you'll be glad you got it when you needed it.
<br />
<br />As far as sex and feeling sexy, I agree it is hard to feel sexy when you look like a beach ball valve is sticking out of your tummy, but how sexy can a person feel when they look like a walking skeleton? I filled out nicely according to my hubby, I grew curves....LOL. He says I look better now, than when we got married. My hubby always thinks I am sexy, even when I am lying in a hospital bed with no make-up on, smoking a neb, and coughing my brains out....maybe he is twisted? After 14 yrs I don't argue with him, let him think what he wants
If someone loves you, they will accept what ever you have to do to fight this disease. <br />
<br />Yes, you should try to eat enough, but sometimes it is immpossible for a human to consume the calories that CF requires. Don't think of a feeding tube as admitting defeat, you are actually fighting back when you get one. Okay...I'll get off my soap box now
<br />
<br />Andrea 32 w/CF /F507 & F508 / DX 8 mos. old.
Playswithpixels
New member
Annie, I don't know you personally. I actually don't know any other CFer's personally. Sometimes I feel like the only one in the world who has this stupid disease. I don't know what your situation is exactly, but I have been as low as you are now. In fact just recently I got the ol' "you need to use oxygen when you exercise" speech from my CF Doctor. I cried for a week after that. This winter has been the worst as far as my lungs, I worry if this is a sign of things to come. After I allowed myself some sad days, I dug my heels in for the long road ahead. Don't give up! You mean so much to this community, your family, friends, and the staff at whatever CF clinic you go too. You may not know it but we (CFer's) are looked up too by all these people. We show them what a person is capable of when faced with adversity. We are fighters by nature, and they admire us for it. Right now you are depressed, don't make decisions when you feel this way. Give yourself some time to adjust to the idea of this change in your life, talk to someone in person about it, like the social worker at the clinic. Let your Doctor know how you feel, and don't hold back. Think about the benefits of getting a tube, in fact write down the pros & cons. You mentioned "live" twice in your previous message, in your heart I don't believe you want to give up. I refer to CF as a monster, and I personally don't plan on letting it win easily. Please don't give in to it so soon in your life.
Andrea 32 w/ CF
Andrea 32 w/ CF
Playswithpixels
New member
Annie, I don't know you personally. I actually don't know any other CFer's personally. Sometimes I feel like the only one in the world who has this stupid disease. I don't know what your situation is exactly, but I have been as low as you are now. In fact just recently I got the ol' "you need to use oxygen when you exercise" speech from my CF Doctor. I cried for a week after that. This winter has been the worst as far as my lungs, I worry if this is a sign of things to come. After I allowed myself some sad days, I dug my heels in for the long road ahead. Don't give up! You mean so much to this community, your family, friends, and the staff at whatever CF clinic you go too. You may not know it but we (CFer's) are looked up too by all these people. We show them what a person is capable of when faced with adversity. We are fighters by nature, and they admire us for it. Right now you are depressed, don't make decisions when you feel this way. Give yourself some time to adjust to the idea of this change in your life, talk to someone in person about it, like the social worker at the clinic. Let your Doctor know how you feel, and don't hold back. Think about the benefits of getting a tube, in fact write down the pros & cons. You mentioned "live" twice in your previous message, in your heart I don't believe you want to give up. I refer to CF as a monster, and I personally don't plan on letting it win easily. Please don't give in to it so soon in your life.
Andrea 32 w/ CF
Andrea 32 w/ CF
Playswithpixels
New member
Annie, I don't know you personally. I actually don't know any other CFer's personally. Sometimes I feel like the only one in the world who has this stupid disease. I don't know what your situation is exactly, but I have been as low as you are now. In fact just recently I got the ol' "you need to use oxygen when you exercise" speech from my CF Doctor. I cried for a week after that. This winter has been the worst as far as my lungs, I worry if this is a sign of things to come. After I allowed myself some sad days, I dug my heels in for the long road ahead. Don't give up! You mean so much to this community, your family, friends, and the staff at whatever CF clinic you go too. You may not know it but we (CFer's) are looked up too by all these people. We show them what a person is capable of when faced with adversity. We are fighters by nature, and they admire us for it. Right now you are depressed, don't make decisions when you feel this way. Give yourself some time to adjust to the idea of this change in your life, talk to someone in person about it, like the social worker at the clinic. Let your Doctor know how you feel, and don't hold back. Think about the benefits of getting a tube, in fact write down the pros & cons. You mentioned "live" twice in your previous message, in your heart I don't believe you want to give up. I refer to CF as a monster, and I personally don't plan on letting it win easily. Please don't give in to it so soon in your life.
Andrea 32 w/ CF
Andrea 32 w/ CF
Playswithpixels
New member
Annie, I don't know you personally. I actually don't know any other CFer's personally. Sometimes I feel like the only one in the world who has this stupid disease. I don't know what your situation is exactly, but I have been as low as you are now. In fact just recently I got the ol' "you need to use oxygen when you exercise" speech from my CF Doctor. I cried for a week after that. This winter has been the worst as far as my lungs, I worry if this is a sign of things to come. After I allowed myself some sad days, I dug my heels in for the long road ahead. Don't give up! You mean so much to this community, your family, friends, and the staff at whatever CF clinic you go too. You may not know it but we (CFer's) are looked up too by all these people. We show them what a person is capable of when faced with adversity. We are fighters by nature, and they admire us for it. Right now you are depressed, don't make decisions when you feel this way. Give yourself some time to adjust to the idea of this change in your life, talk to someone in person about it, like the social worker at the clinic. Let your Doctor know how you feel, and don't hold back. Think about the benefits of getting a tube, in fact write down the pros & cons. You mentioned "live" twice in your previous message, in your heart I don't believe you want to give up. I refer to CF as a monster, and I personally don't plan on letting it win easily. Please don't give in to it so soon in your life.
Andrea 32 w/ CF
Andrea 32 w/ CF
Playswithpixels
New member
Annie, I don't know you personally. I actually don't know any other CFer's personally. Sometimes I feel like the only one in the world who has this stupid disease. I don't know what your situation is exactly, but I have been as low as you are now. In fact just recently I got the ol' "you need to use oxygen when you exercise" speech from my CF Doctor. I cried for a week after that. This winter has been the worst as far as my lungs, I worry if this is a sign of things to come. After I allowed myself some sad days, I dug my heels in for the long road ahead. Don't give up! You mean so much to this community, your family, friends, and the staff at whatever CF clinic you go too. You may not know it but we (CFer's) are looked up too by all these people. We show them what a person is capable of when faced with adversity. We are fighters by nature, and they admire us for it. Right now you are depressed, don't make decisions when you feel this way. Give yourself some time to adjust to the idea of this change in your life, talk to someone in person about it, like the social worker at the clinic. Let your Doctor know how you feel, and don't hold back. Think about the benefits of getting a tube, in fact write down the pros & cons. You mentioned "live" twice in your previous message, in your heart I don't believe you want to give up. I refer to CF as a monster, and I personally don't plan on letting it win easily. Please don't give in to it so soon in your life.
<br />
<br />Andrea 32 w/ CF
<br />
<br />Andrea 32 w/ CF
Sevenstars
New member
Hey Annie,
I don't want to be one more person saying "I know how you feel" because I don't. I've had a lot of the problems you do... we all have here and there, but we all process them differently. We all have different friends, doctors, caregivers... it makes everything different.
In actuality, I've never had a G-tube. By all rights I shouldn't even be posting in this thread. But what I do have is plenty of scars to make me feel unsexy and undesirable... and a lot of times, unfit to live. Before I was diagnosed when I was 8, I was horribly underweight like a lot of people in this thread... no, I never had to use a g-tube to catch up, but I can relate to feeling scrawny, weak and "different". You have so much else to worry about, a g-tube would free up your mind (and a lot of resources in your body) to worry about other things.
When you do catch up, you can look back at it, again, as just another bump in the road, and you can enjoy feeling strong from it, and looking better. I can assure you that most guys would probably pick a healthy curvy woman with a little scar over a skeleton-like one. Some guys even think scars are cool (they certainly compare their own, enough!). So just think about it in a different light. I know it's hard, but even if you want to die, starvation and feeling weak really isn't a good way to go. And who knows, maybe if you feel a little stronger, and a little sexier... maybe you won't want to die anymore.
big hugs from someone that doesn't know you
I don't want to be one more person saying "I know how you feel" because I don't. I've had a lot of the problems you do... we all have here and there, but we all process them differently. We all have different friends, doctors, caregivers... it makes everything different.
In actuality, I've never had a G-tube. By all rights I shouldn't even be posting in this thread. But what I do have is plenty of scars to make me feel unsexy and undesirable... and a lot of times, unfit to live. Before I was diagnosed when I was 8, I was horribly underweight like a lot of people in this thread... no, I never had to use a g-tube to catch up, but I can relate to feeling scrawny, weak and "different". You have so much else to worry about, a g-tube would free up your mind (and a lot of resources in your body) to worry about other things.
When you do catch up, you can look back at it, again, as just another bump in the road, and you can enjoy feeling strong from it, and looking better. I can assure you that most guys would probably pick a healthy curvy woman with a little scar over a skeleton-like one. Some guys even think scars are cool (they certainly compare their own, enough!). So just think about it in a different light. I know it's hard, but even if you want to die, starvation and feeling weak really isn't a good way to go. And who knows, maybe if you feel a little stronger, and a little sexier... maybe you won't want to die anymore.
big hugs from someone that doesn't know you
Sevenstars
New member
Hey Annie,
I don't want to be one more person saying "I know how you feel" because I don't. I've had a lot of the problems you do... we all have here and there, but we all process them differently. We all have different friends, doctors, caregivers... it makes everything different.
In actuality, I've never had a G-tube. By all rights I shouldn't even be posting in this thread. But what I do have is plenty of scars to make me feel unsexy and undesirable... and a lot of times, unfit to live. Before I was diagnosed when I was 8, I was horribly underweight like a lot of people in this thread... no, I never had to use a g-tube to catch up, but I can relate to feeling scrawny, weak and "different". You have so much else to worry about, a g-tube would free up your mind (and a lot of resources in your body) to worry about other things.
When you do catch up, you can look back at it, again, as just another bump in the road, and you can enjoy feeling strong from it, and looking better. I can assure you that most guys would probably pick a healthy curvy woman with a little scar over a skeleton-like one. Some guys even think scars are cool (they certainly compare their own, enough!). So just think about it in a different light. I know it's hard, but even if you want to die, starvation and feeling weak really isn't a good way to go. And who knows, maybe if you feel a little stronger, and a little sexier... maybe you won't want to die anymore.
big hugs from someone that doesn't know you
I don't want to be one more person saying "I know how you feel" because I don't. I've had a lot of the problems you do... we all have here and there, but we all process them differently. We all have different friends, doctors, caregivers... it makes everything different.
In actuality, I've never had a G-tube. By all rights I shouldn't even be posting in this thread. But what I do have is plenty of scars to make me feel unsexy and undesirable... and a lot of times, unfit to live. Before I was diagnosed when I was 8, I was horribly underweight like a lot of people in this thread... no, I never had to use a g-tube to catch up, but I can relate to feeling scrawny, weak and "different". You have so much else to worry about, a g-tube would free up your mind (and a lot of resources in your body) to worry about other things.
When you do catch up, you can look back at it, again, as just another bump in the road, and you can enjoy feeling strong from it, and looking better. I can assure you that most guys would probably pick a healthy curvy woman with a little scar over a skeleton-like one. Some guys even think scars are cool (they certainly compare their own, enough!). So just think about it in a different light. I know it's hard, but even if you want to die, starvation and feeling weak really isn't a good way to go. And who knows, maybe if you feel a little stronger, and a little sexier... maybe you won't want to die anymore.
big hugs from someone that doesn't know you
Sevenstars
New member
Hey Annie,
I don't want to be one more person saying "I know how you feel" because I don't. I've had a lot of the problems you do... we all have here and there, but we all process them differently. We all have different friends, doctors, caregivers... it makes everything different.
In actuality, I've never had a G-tube. By all rights I shouldn't even be posting in this thread. But what I do have is plenty of scars to make me feel unsexy and undesirable... and a lot of times, unfit to live. Before I was diagnosed when I was 8, I was horribly underweight like a lot of people in this thread... no, I never had to use a g-tube to catch up, but I can relate to feeling scrawny, weak and "different". You have so much else to worry about, a g-tube would free up your mind (and a lot of resources in your body) to worry about other things.
When you do catch up, you can look back at it, again, as just another bump in the road, and you can enjoy feeling strong from it, and looking better. I can assure you that most guys would probably pick a healthy curvy woman with a little scar over a skeleton-like one. Some guys even think scars are cool (they certainly compare their own, enough!). So just think about it in a different light. I know it's hard, but even if you want to die, starvation and feeling weak really isn't a good way to go. And who knows, maybe if you feel a little stronger, and a little sexier... maybe you won't want to die anymore.
big hugs from someone that doesn't know you
I don't want to be one more person saying "I know how you feel" because I don't. I've had a lot of the problems you do... we all have here and there, but we all process them differently. We all have different friends, doctors, caregivers... it makes everything different.
In actuality, I've never had a G-tube. By all rights I shouldn't even be posting in this thread. But what I do have is plenty of scars to make me feel unsexy and undesirable... and a lot of times, unfit to live. Before I was diagnosed when I was 8, I was horribly underweight like a lot of people in this thread... no, I never had to use a g-tube to catch up, but I can relate to feeling scrawny, weak and "different". You have so much else to worry about, a g-tube would free up your mind (and a lot of resources in your body) to worry about other things.
When you do catch up, you can look back at it, again, as just another bump in the road, and you can enjoy feeling strong from it, and looking better. I can assure you that most guys would probably pick a healthy curvy woman with a little scar over a skeleton-like one. Some guys even think scars are cool (they certainly compare their own, enough!). So just think about it in a different light. I know it's hard, but even if you want to die, starvation and feeling weak really isn't a good way to go. And who knows, maybe if you feel a little stronger, and a little sexier... maybe you won't want to die anymore.
big hugs from someone that doesn't know you
Sevenstars
New member
Hey Annie,
I don't want to be one more person saying "I know how you feel" because I don't. I've had a lot of the problems you do... we all have here and there, but we all process them differently. We all have different friends, doctors, caregivers... it makes everything different.
In actuality, I've never had a G-tube. By all rights I shouldn't even be posting in this thread. But what I do have is plenty of scars to make me feel unsexy and undesirable... and a lot of times, unfit to live. Before I was diagnosed when I was 8, I was horribly underweight like a lot of people in this thread... no, I never had to use a g-tube to catch up, but I can relate to feeling scrawny, weak and "different". You have so much else to worry about, a g-tube would free up your mind (and a lot of resources in your body) to worry about other things.
When you do catch up, you can look back at it, again, as just another bump in the road, and you can enjoy feeling strong from it, and looking better. I can assure you that most guys would probably pick a healthy curvy woman with a little scar over a skeleton-like one. Some guys even think scars are cool (they certainly compare their own, enough!). So just think about it in a different light. I know it's hard, but even if you want to die, starvation and feeling weak really isn't a good way to go. And who knows, maybe if you feel a little stronger, and a little sexier... maybe you won't want to die anymore.
big hugs from someone that doesn't know you
I don't want to be one more person saying "I know how you feel" because I don't. I've had a lot of the problems you do... we all have here and there, but we all process them differently. We all have different friends, doctors, caregivers... it makes everything different.
In actuality, I've never had a G-tube. By all rights I shouldn't even be posting in this thread. But what I do have is plenty of scars to make me feel unsexy and undesirable... and a lot of times, unfit to live. Before I was diagnosed when I was 8, I was horribly underweight like a lot of people in this thread... no, I never had to use a g-tube to catch up, but I can relate to feeling scrawny, weak and "different". You have so much else to worry about, a g-tube would free up your mind (and a lot of resources in your body) to worry about other things.
When you do catch up, you can look back at it, again, as just another bump in the road, and you can enjoy feeling strong from it, and looking better. I can assure you that most guys would probably pick a healthy curvy woman with a little scar over a skeleton-like one. Some guys even think scars are cool (they certainly compare their own, enough!). So just think about it in a different light. I know it's hard, but even if you want to die, starvation and feeling weak really isn't a good way to go. And who knows, maybe if you feel a little stronger, and a little sexier... maybe you won't want to die anymore.
big hugs from someone that doesn't know you
Sevenstars
New member
Hey Annie,
<br />
<br />I don't want to be one more person saying "I know how you feel" because I don't. I've had a lot of the problems you do... we all have here and there, but we all process them differently. We all have different friends, doctors, caregivers... it makes everything different.
<br />
<br />In actuality, I've never had a G-tube. By all rights I shouldn't even be posting in this thread. But what I do have is plenty of scars to make me feel unsexy and undesirable... and a lot of times, unfit to live. Before I was diagnosed when I was 8, I was horribly underweight like a lot of people in this thread... no, I never had to use a g-tube to catch up, but I can relate to feeling scrawny, weak and "different". You have so much else to worry about, a g-tube would free up your mind (and a lot of resources in your body) to worry about other things.
<br />
<br />When you do catch up, you can look back at it, again, as just another bump in the road, and you can enjoy feeling strong from it, and looking better. I can assure you that most guys would probably pick a healthy curvy woman with a little scar over a skeleton-like one. Some guys even think scars are cool (they certainly compare their own, enough!). So just think about it in a different light. I know it's hard, but even if you want to die, starvation and feeling weak really isn't a good way to go. And who knows, maybe if you feel a little stronger, and a little sexier... maybe you won't want to die anymore.
<br />
<br />big hugs from someone that doesn't know you
<br />
<br />I don't want to be one more person saying "I know how you feel" because I don't. I've had a lot of the problems you do... we all have here and there, but we all process them differently. We all have different friends, doctors, caregivers... it makes everything different.
<br />
<br />In actuality, I've never had a G-tube. By all rights I shouldn't even be posting in this thread. But what I do have is plenty of scars to make me feel unsexy and undesirable... and a lot of times, unfit to live. Before I was diagnosed when I was 8, I was horribly underweight like a lot of people in this thread... no, I never had to use a g-tube to catch up, but I can relate to feeling scrawny, weak and "different". You have so much else to worry about, a g-tube would free up your mind (and a lot of resources in your body) to worry about other things.
<br />
<br />When you do catch up, you can look back at it, again, as just another bump in the road, and you can enjoy feeling strong from it, and looking better. I can assure you that most guys would probably pick a healthy curvy woman with a little scar over a skeleton-like one. Some guys even think scars are cool (they certainly compare their own, enough!). So just think about it in a different light. I know it's hard, but even if you want to die, starvation and feeling weak really isn't a good way to go. And who knows, maybe if you feel a little stronger, and a little sexier... maybe you won't want to die anymore.
<br />
<br />big hugs from someone that doesn't know you