Grandparent wanna-be

[jlmortenson]

I am brand new to this forum. My son is 26(diagnosed with CF at 13) and in a strong loving relationship. He has been tested and is not fertile...
He has been greatly disappointed that he can't have children the regular way, and I have not talked to him about in-vetro. I guess I would like to know how others feel about a man with a shortened life expectancy fathering children... I know his girlfriend would love to have kids. They are talking marriage. Any advice that I could pass on? I can't think of anything that I would love more than to have a grandchild from my son. I am just not sure how ethical it is. I keep thinking that "Mother Nature" probably made CF males sterile for a reason... But oh, what a wonderful father he would be!

 

[jlmortenson]

I am brand new to this forum. My son is 26(diagnosed with CF at 13) and in a strong loving relationship. He has been tested and is not fertile...
He has been greatly disappointed that he can't have children the regular way, and I have not talked to him about in-vetro. I guess I would like to know how others feel about a man with a shortened life expectancy fathering children... I know his girlfriend would love to have kids. They are talking marriage. Any advice that I could pass on? I can't think of anything that I would love more than to have a grandchild from my son. I am just not sure how ethical it is. I keep thinking that "Mother Nature" probably made CF males sterile for a reason... But oh, what a wonderful father he would be!

 

[jlmortenson]

I am brand new to this forum. My son is 26(diagnosed with CF at 13) and in a strong loving relationship. He has been tested and is not fertile...
He has been greatly disappointed that he can't have children the regular way, and I have not talked to him about in-vetro. I guess I would like to know how others feel about a man with a shortened life expectancy fathering children... I know his girlfriend would love to have kids. They are talking marriage. Any advice that I could pass on? I can't think of anything that I would love more than to have a grandchild from my son. I am just not sure how ethical it is. I keep thinking that "Mother Nature" probably made CF males sterile for a reason... But oh, what a wonderful father he would be!

 

[jlmortenson]

I am brand new to this forum. My son is 26(diagnosed with CF at 13) and in a strong loving relationship. He has been tested and is not fertile...
He has been greatly disappointed that he can't have children the regular way, and I have not talked to him about in-vetro. I guess I would like to know how others feel about a man with a shortened life expectancy fathering children... I know his girlfriend would love to have kids. They are talking marriage. Any advice that I could pass on? I can't think of anything that I would love more than to have a grandchild from my son. I am just not sure how ethical it is. I keep thinking that "Mother Nature" probably made CF males sterile for a reason... But oh, what a wonderful father he would be!

 

[jlmortenson]

I am brand new to this forum. My son is 26(diagnosed with CF at 13) and in a strong loving relationship. He has been tested and is not fertile...
<br />He has been greatly disappointed that he can't have children the regular way, and I have not talked to him about in-vetro. I guess I would like to know how others feel about a man with a shortened life expectancy fathering children... I know his girlfriend would love to have kids. They are talking marriage. Any advice that I could pass on? I can't think of anything that I would love more than to have a grandchild from my son. I am just not sure how ethical it is. I keep thinking that "Mother Nature" probably made CF males sterile for a reason... But oh, what a wonderful father he would be!

 

[jena]

I think it's up to him to decide his personal ethics on fathering a child. And it sounds to me like he wants to. I would hope that you pass on information about invitro and let him be aware of all his options.
My son is only 7, and we are a long ways off from facing this issue. Yet it is something I think about quite often. I do not expect him to have a functioning vas (96%-98% of cf men do not... my son also has "classic" cf with 2 "severe" mutations). The day will come when I have to tell him about this possibility. I also plan to talk about his options. I want him to know that I will love and support whatever decision he makes (no children, in vitro, adoption, donor sperm, foster parenting).
I don't really buy into the whole "Mother Nature" argument (saying he is unable to have children for a reason). I know plenty of people with infertility issues and I wouldn't discourage them from trying to fulfill a parenting dream. I also know plenty of fertile people who have no business parenting a child (what about the crazy parents who kill, abuse, neglect, and molest their children).
You seem like a loving mother. My heart goes out to you. Even though you probably expected your son to be infertile, I am sure it was still painful to get this final answer. I am so happy that he has a supportive family and a loving girlfriend that he plans to marry. Keep supporting him.

Jena

 

[jena]

I think it's up to him to decide his personal ethics on fathering a child. And it sounds to me like he wants to. I would hope that you pass on information about invitro and let him be aware of all his options.
My son is only 7, and we are a long ways off from facing this issue. Yet it is something I think about quite often. I do not expect him to have a functioning vas (96%-98% of cf men do not... my son also has "classic" cf with 2 "severe" mutations). The day will come when I have to tell him about this possibility. I also plan to talk about his options. I want him to know that I will love and support whatever decision he makes (no children, in vitro, adoption, donor sperm, foster parenting).
I don't really buy into the whole "Mother Nature" argument (saying he is unable to have children for a reason). I know plenty of people with infertility issues and I wouldn't discourage them from trying to fulfill a parenting dream. I also know plenty of fertile people who have no business parenting a child (what about the crazy parents who kill, abuse, neglect, and molest their children).
You seem like a loving mother. My heart goes out to you. Even though you probably expected your son to be infertile, I am sure it was still painful to get this final answer. I am so happy that he has a supportive family and a loving girlfriend that he plans to marry. Keep supporting him.

Jena

 

[jena]

I think it's up to him to decide his personal ethics on fathering a child. And it sounds to me like he wants to. I would hope that you pass on information about invitro and let him be aware of all his options.
My son is only 7, and we are a long ways off from facing this issue. Yet it is something I think about quite often. I do not expect him to have a functioning vas (96%-98% of cf men do not... my son also has "classic" cf with 2 "severe" mutations). The day will come when I have to tell him about this possibility. I also plan to talk about his options. I want him to know that I will love and support whatever decision he makes (no children, in vitro, adoption, donor sperm, foster parenting).
I don't really buy into the whole "Mother Nature" argument (saying he is unable to have children for a reason). I know plenty of people with infertility issues and I wouldn't discourage them from trying to fulfill a parenting dream. I also know plenty of fertile people who have no business parenting a child (what about the crazy parents who kill, abuse, neglect, and molest their children).
You seem like a loving mother. My heart goes out to you. Even though you probably expected your son to be infertile, I am sure it was still painful to get this final answer. I am so happy that he has a supportive family and a loving girlfriend that he plans to marry. Keep supporting him.

Jena

 

[jena]

I think it's up to him to decide his personal ethics on fathering a child. And it sounds to me like he wants to. I would hope that you pass on information about invitro and let him be aware of all his options.
My son is only 7, and we are a long ways off from facing this issue. Yet it is something I think about quite often. I do not expect him to have a functioning vas (96%-98% of cf men do not... my son also has "classic" cf with 2 "severe" mutations). The day will come when I have to tell him about this possibility. I also plan to talk about his options. I want him to know that I will love and support whatever decision he makes (no children, in vitro, adoption, donor sperm, foster parenting).
I don't really buy into the whole "Mother Nature" argument (saying he is unable to have children for a reason). I know plenty of people with infertility issues and I wouldn't discourage them from trying to fulfill a parenting dream. I also know plenty of fertile people who have no business parenting a child (what about the crazy parents who kill, abuse, neglect, and molest their children).
You seem like a loving mother. My heart goes out to you. Even though you probably expected your son to be infertile, I am sure it was still painful to get this final answer. I am so happy that he has a supportive family and a loving girlfriend that he plans to marry. Keep supporting him.

Jena

 

[jena]

I think it's up to him to decide his personal ethics on fathering a child. And it sounds to me like he wants to. I would hope that you pass on information about invitro and let him be aware of all his options.
<br />My son is only 7, and we are a long ways off from facing this issue. Yet it is something I think about quite often. I do not expect him to have a functioning vas (96%-98% of cf men do not... my son also has "classic" cf with 2 "severe" mutations). The day will come when I have to tell him about this possibility. I also plan to talk about his options. I want him to know that I will love and support whatever decision he makes (no children, in vitro, adoption, donor sperm, foster parenting).
<br />I don't really buy into the whole "Mother Nature" argument (saying he is unable to have children for a reason). I know plenty of people with infertility issues and I wouldn't discourage them from trying to fulfill a parenting dream. I also know plenty of fertile people who have no business parenting a child (what about the crazy parents who kill, abuse, neglect, and molest their children).
<br />You seem like a loving mother. My heart goes out to you. Even though you probably expected your son to be infertile, I am sure it was still painful to get this final answer. I am so happy that he has a supportive family and a loving girlfriend that he plans to marry. Keep supporting him.
<br />
<br />Jena

 

[jlmortenson]

Thank you Jena... you make great sense! We are a lucky family... we all support each other!

 

[jlmortenson]

Thank you Jena... you make great sense! We are a lucky family... we all support each other!

 

[jlmortenson]

Thank you Jena... you make great sense! We are a lucky family... we all support each other!

 

[jlmortenson]

Thank you Jena... you make great sense! We are a lucky family... we all support each other!

 

[jlmortenson]

Thank you Jena... you make great sense! We are a lucky family... we all support each other!

 

[Gingerloveslife]

I just wanted to reply because I am a 27 yr old cfer with a five year old son. I always thought that I would never be able to get pregnant but God had another thought. I could not imagine my life without my Toby and even though I have cf I know I am just as good a mom as someone without CF.

Take a look around the forums and you will see that a lot of us adults with CF have children and our children are doing well despite their mommy or daddy being sick. Yes sometimes it does get hard but that just means that we need good support systems and by you posting about it I think your son probably will have a good support system.

Please let your son make this decision and just know that if it is meant to be, God will take care of your grandchild whatever the future holds for your son. No one knows but God how long each of our lives will be--your son may live to be over 50 like others on this site and it would be sad that he could have spent that time with children if that is what he wanted. Just my opinion but I hope it helps! <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-smile.gif" border="0"> Ginger

 

[Gingerloveslife]

I just wanted to reply because I am a 27 yr old cfer with a five year old son. I always thought that I would never be able to get pregnant but God had another thought. I could not imagine my life without my Toby and even though I have cf I know I am just as good a mom as someone without CF.

Take a look around the forums and you will see that a lot of us adults with CF have children and our children are doing well despite their mommy or daddy being sick. Yes sometimes it does get hard but that just means that we need good support systems and by you posting about it I think your son probably will have a good support system.

Please let your son make this decision and just know that if it is meant to be, God will take care of your grandchild whatever the future holds for your son. No one knows but God how long each of our lives will be--your son may live to be over 50 like others on this site and it would be sad that he could have spent that time with children if that is what he wanted. Just my opinion but I hope it helps! <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-smile.gif" border="0"> Ginger

 

[Gingerloveslife]

I just wanted to reply because I am a 27 yr old cfer with a five year old son. I always thought that I would never be able to get pregnant but God had another thought. I could not imagine my life without my Toby and even though I have cf I know I am just as good a mom as someone without CF.

Take a look around the forums and you will see that a lot of us adults with CF have children and our children are doing well despite their mommy or daddy being sick. Yes sometimes it does get hard but that just means that we need good support systems and by you posting about it I think your son probably will have a good support system.

Please let your son make this decision and just know that if it is meant to be, God will take care of your grandchild whatever the future holds for your son. No one knows but God how long each of our lives will be--your son may live to be over 50 like others on this site and it would be sad that he could have spent that time with children if that is what he wanted. Just my opinion but I hope it helps! <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-smile.gif" border="0"> Ginger

 

[Gingerloveslife]

I just wanted to reply because I am a 27 yr old cfer with a five year old son. I always thought that I would never be able to get pregnant but God had another thought. I could not imagine my life without my Toby and even though I have cf I know I am just as good a mom as someone without CF.

Take a look around the forums and you will see that a lot of us adults with CF have children and our children are doing well despite their mommy or daddy being sick. Yes sometimes it does get hard but that just means that we need good support systems and by you posting about it I think your son probably will have a good support system.

Please let your son make this decision and just know that if it is meant to be, God will take care of your grandchild whatever the future holds for your son. No one knows but God how long each of our lives will be--your son may live to be over 50 like others on this site and it would be sad that he could have spent that time with children if that is what he wanted. Just my opinion but I hope it helps! <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-smile.gif" border="0"> Ginger

 

[Gingerloveslife]

I just wanted to reply because I am a 27 yr old cfer with a five year old son. I always thought that I would never be able to get pregnant but God had another thought. I could not imagine my life without my Toby and even though I have cf I know I am just as good a mom as someone without CF.
<br />
<br />Take a look around the forums and you will see that a lot of us adults with CF have children and our children are doing well despite their mommy or daddy being sick. Yes sometimes it does get hard but that just means that we need good support systems and by you posting about it I think your son probably will have a good support system.
<br />
<br />Please let your son make this decision and just know that if it is meant to be, God will take care of your grandchild whatever the future holds for your son. No one knows but God how long each of our lives will be--your son may live to be over 50 like others on this site and it would be sad that he could have spent that time with children if that is what he wanted. Just my opinion but I hope it helps! <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-smile.gif" border="0"> Ginger