Has Allie ever provided value to you in this community?

[jjflash]

From comments Allie made, I think that the main problem is that she doesn't hear from all the people who appreciate and enjoy her as a friend and as a resource. Negative comments are written clearly, but we just appreciate the positive rather than acknowledging it. From the people I've heard in chat and in the forums and in comments on her blogs, I know that I'm not alone in really valuing her and thinking that as a community we benefit from her existence.

Since her motivation for leaving was that she felt most people wanted her to, I think that those who don't agree with this sentiment should make that clear. This can be through a simple statement that she has helped you in the past or you're appreciated her presence or a longer personal statement or story.

I for one don't really know her well, but I think that the entire community would be dramatically reduced by the loss of her. She is someone who is willing to answer a question, even if it's been asked 30 times and the rest of us are ignoring it. She's someone who's willing to share her thoughts and her experiences when it's hard. She's someone who always remembers birthdays and checks in when she knows we've been sick. She's someone whose willing to do research for others on different mutations. She's someone who's always willing to hang out with you on a rough night. She's someone who takes the time to write words which I seek out. She's someone who is trying so desperately to help anyone and anything she can in the universe. She's someone who's willing to listen even when she doesn't know what to say or how to fix it. She's a wonderful person.

I wish the forums had an invitation function so that we could all send her an invitation so that she would know how welcome and wanted she is here, but hopefully this thread can serve as an opportunity to show her all the wonderful things she does which it seems she's not even aware of.

I'm not looking for people to say they always agree with her or anything. Just identify how she provides value to you.

Thanks!

 

[jjflash]

From comments Allie made, I think that the main problem is that she doesn't hear from all the people who appreciate and enjoy her as a friend and as a resource. Negative comments are written clearly, but we just appreciate the positive rather than acknowledging it. From the people I've heard in chat and in the forums and in comments on her blogs, I know that I'm not alone in really valuing her and thinking that as a community we benefit from her existence.

Since her motivation for leaving was that she felt most people wanted her to, I think that those who don't agree with this sentiment should make that clear. This can be through a simple statement that she has helped you in the past or you're appreciated her presence or a longer personal statement or story.

I for one don't really know her well, but I think that the entire community would be dramatically reduced by the loss of her. She is someone who is willing to answer a question, even if it's been asked 30 times and the rest of us are ignoring it. She's someone who's willing to share her thoughts and her experiences when it's hard. She's someone who always remembers birthdays and checks in when she knows we've been sick. She's someone whose willing to do research for others on different mutations. She's someone who's always willing to hang out with you on a rough night. She's someone who takes the time to write words which I seek out. She's someone who is trying so desperately to help anyone and anything she can in the universe. She's someone who's willing to listen even when she doesn't know what to say or how to fix it. She's a wonderful person.

I wish the forums had an invitation function so that we could all send her an invitation so that she would know how welcome and wanted she is here, but hopefully this thread can serve as an opportunity to show her all the wonderful things she does which it seems she's not even aware of.

I'm not looking for people to say they always agree with her or anything. Just identify how she provides value to you.

Thanks!

 

[jjflash]

From comments Allie made, I think that the main problem is that she doesn't hear from all the people who appreciate and enjoy her as a friend and as a resource. Negative comments are written clearly, but we just appreciate the positive rather than acknowledging it. From the people I've heard in chat and in the forums and in comments on her blogs, I know that I'm not alone in really valuing her and thinking that as a community we benefit from her existence.

Since her motivation for leaving was that she felt most people wanted her to, I think that those who don't agree with this sentiment should make that clear. This can be through a simple statement that she has helped you in the past or you're appreciated her presence or a longer personal statement or story.

I for one don't really know her well, but I think that the entire community would be dramatically reduced by the loss of her. She is someone who is willing to answer a question, even if it's been asked 30 times and the rest of us are ignoring it. She's someone who's willing to share her thoughts and her experiences when it's hard. She's someone who always remembers birthdays and checks in when she knows we've been sick. She's someone whose willing to do research for others on different mutations. She's someone who's always willing to hang out with you on a rough night. She's someone who takes the time to write words which I seek out. She's someone who is trying so desperately to help anyone and anything she can in the universe. She's someone who's willing to listen even when she doesn't know what to say or how to fix it. She's a wonderful person.

I wish the forums had an invitation function so that we could all send her an invitation so that she would know how welcome and wanted she is here, but hopefully this thread can serve as an opportunity to show her all the wonderful things she does which it seems she's not even aware of.

I'm not looking for people to say they always agree with her or anything. Just identify how she provides value to you.

Thanks!

 

[Diane]

I would like Allie to come back. Although i dont know her too well, i always read what she wrote, and valued her because she is on the opposite side of cf and can give info from the experiences RY has been thru. From what i read about RY he went thru a lot ,and we can all learn something ,no matter how little, from what Allie shares . One thing i learned from Allies posts about Ry is that he never gave up or into cf, he lived as full as he could and as long as he could. That kind of info is invaluable to those who are down about their cf , it gives one courage to try to live their life to the fullest. See Allie? I was paying attention and kept the stories with me, even if you thought no-one was

 

[Diane]

I would like Allie to come back. Although i dont know her too well, i always read what she wrote, and valued her because she is on the opposite side of cf and can give info from the experiences RY has been thru. From what i read about RY he went thru a lot ,and we can all learn something ,no matter how little, from what Allie shares . One thing i learned from Allies posts about Ry is that he never gave up or into cf, he lived as full as he could and as long as he could. That kind of info is invaluable to those who are down about their cf , it gives one courage to try to live their life to the fullest. See Allie? I was paying attention and kept the stories with me, even if you thought no-one was

 

[Diane]

I would like Allie to come back. Although i dont know her too well, i always read what she wrote, and valued her because she is on the opposite side of cf and can give info from the experiences RY has been thru. From what i read about RY he went thru a lot ,and we can all learn something ,no matter how little, from what Allie shares . One thing i learned from Allies posts about Ry is that he never gave up or into cf, he lived as full as he could and as long as he could. That kind of info is invaluable to those who are down about their cf , it gives one courage to try to live their life to the fullest. See Allie? I was paying attention and kept the stories with me, even if you thought no-one was

 

[JazzysMom]

I have to disagree a bit. Many many people supported her & told her so. Both thru this forum, my space, messenger, aim & other sources. I nor did anyone else want to see Allie go nor did we ask her to. Allie is in a very bad state of mind. Not from US, but from what life has brought her. Not just thru RY's death, but her childhood etc. I truly believe that whatever negative stuff was put in writing was outweighed greatly by the responses in writing to her blogs & to her directly as well as anyone who actually chatted with her. She comes on or has someone check on things. She is still connected even if you dont see her as much. Just please realize there is a lot to the whole story that took place. More then what was in writing & even that has been deleted. TO answer your ???...Yes Allie has provided value to me in this community. I never denied that fact!

 

[JazzysMom]

I have to disagree a bit. Many many people supported her & told her so. Both thru this forum, my space, messenger, aim & other sources. I nor did anyone else want to see Allie go nor did we ask her to. Allie is in a very bad state of mind. Not from US, but from what life has brought her. Not just thru RY's death, but her childhood etc. I truly believe that whatever negative stuff was put in writing was outweighed greatly by the responses in writing to her blogs & to her directly as well as anyone who actually chatted with her. She comes on or has someone check on things. She is still connected even if you dont see her as much. Just please realize there is a lot to the whole story that took place. More then what was in writing & even that has been deleted. TO answer your ???...Yes Allie has provided value to me in this community. I never denied that fact!

 

[JazzysMom]

I have to disagree a bit. Many many people supported her & told her so. Both thru this forum, my space, messenger, aim & other sources. I nor did anyone else want to see Allie go nor did we ask her to. Allie is in a very bad state of mind. Not from US, but from what life has brought her. Not just thru RY's death, but her childhood etc. I truly believe that whatever negative stuff was put in writing was outweighed greatly by the responses in writing to her blogs & to her directly as well as anyone who actually chatted with her. She comes on or has someone check on things. She is still connected even if you dont see her as much. Just please realize there is a lot to the whole story that took place. More then what was in writing & even that has been deleted. TO answer your ???...Yes Allie has provided value to me in this community. I never denied that fact!

 

[jbrandonAW]

I liked her. I like outspoken people. I don't like talking to people that are always going to agree with what you have to say. I am still not sure what happened and why see left . If you don't want advice,comments, and imput then don't post you presonal crap on the internet for everyone and there brother to see. DUH!

Allie chose to leave, and I think see will be back. Things get hard sometimes and I think that seeing all of us living didn't let her understand why got wouldn't let RY live. I was just getting to know allie before she left and I wish she would come back.

 

[jbrandonAW]

I liked her. I like outspoken people. I don't like talking to people that are always going to agree with what you have to say. I am still not sure what happened and why see left . If you don't want advice,comments, and imput then don't post you presonal crap on the internet for everyone and there brother to see. DUH!

Allie chose to leave, and I think see will be back. Things get hard sometimes and I think that seeing all of us living didn't let her understand why got wouldn't let RY live. I was just getting to know allie before she left and I wish she would come back.

 

[jbrandonAW]

I liked her. I like outspoken people. I don't like talking to people that are always going to agree with what you have to say. I am still not sure what happened and why see left . If you don't want advice,comments, and imput then don't post you presonal crap on the internet for everyone and there brother to see. DUH!

Allie chose to leave, and I think see will be back. Things get hard sometimes and I think that seeing all of us living didn't let her understand why got wouldn't let RY live. I was just getting to know allie before she left and I wish she would come back.

 

[coltsfan715]

I agree with Mel. I think there was alot more to Allie leaving than some negative things that were said on her blog or in response to comments she made. ALOT of people encouraged her to stay and those same people tried telling her that she helps them. Sometimes it doesn't matter what you say to someone if they are hurting - they hear what they want and they take from things what they want even if it is not necessarily how things are meant.

I am hoping that Allie will come back - I am feeling that she will. I think she just needs time to heal a little bit. I think after the holidays she will start to resurface a little more. It just takes a little while some times.

Allie in case you didn't believe everyone before - you are appreciated here and we all care about you AND Ahava. Take Care of yourself and enjoy the Holidays.

Happy Holidays,
Linds

 

[coltsfan715]

I agree with Mel. I think there was alot more to Allie leaving than some negative things that were said on her blog or in response to comments she made. ALOT of people encouraged her to stay and those same people tried telling her that she helps them. Sometimes it doesn't matter what you say to someone if they are hurting - they hear what they want and they take from things what they want even if it is not necessarily how things are meant.

I am hoping that Allie will come back - I am feeling that she will. I think she just needs time to heal a little bit. I think after the holidays she will start to resurface a little more. It just takes a little while some times.

Allie in case you didn't believe everyone before - you are appreciated here and we all care about you AND Ahava. Take Care of yourself and enjoy the Holidays.

Happy Holidays,
Linds

 

[coltsfan715]

I agree with Mel. I think there was alot more to Allie leaving than some negative things that were said on her blog or in response to comments she made. ALOT of people encouraged her to stay and those same people tried telling her that she helps them. Sometimes it doesn't matter what you say to someone if they are hurting - they hear what they want and they take from things what they want even if it is not necessarily how things are meant.

I am hoping that Allie will come back - I am feeling that she will. I think she just needs time to heal a little bit. I think after the holidays she will start to resurface a little more. It just takes a little while some times.

Allie in case you didn't believe everyone before - you are appreciated here and we all care about you AND Ahava. Take Care of yourself and enjoy the Holidays.

Happy Holidays,
Linds

 

[RH]

Allie was the first person to reply to my first post last year, when I was posting under anonymous. In fact she was the only registered member to reply to me and I really appreciated it. I was the one that made the topic: <a target=_blank class=ftalternatingbarlinklarge href="http://forums.cysticfibrosis.com/messageview.cfm?catid=5&threadid=4953">http://forums.cysticfibrosis.c...?catid=5&threadid=4953</a> about a year ago and I've always identified best with Allie while browsing the forums. She probably doesn't even remember me but I'm sad to see her go and hope she returns. I hope if she decides to leave permanently it isn't because she feels unwanted here.

 

[RH]

Allie was the first person to reply to my first post last year, when I was posting under anonymous. In fact she was the only registered member to reply to me and I really appreciated it. I was the one that made the topic: <a target=_blank class=ftalternatingbarlinklarge href="http://forums.cysticfibrosis.com/messageview.cfm?catid=5&threadid=4953">http://forums.cysticfibrosis.c...?catid=5&threadid=4953</a> about a year ago and I've always identified best with Allie while browsing the forums. She probably doesn't even remember me but I'm sad to see her go and hope she returns. I hope if she decides to leave permanently it isn't because she feels unwanted here.

 

[RH]

Allie was the first person to reply to my first post last year, when I was posting under anonymous. In fact she was the only registered member to reply to me and I really appreciated it. I was the one that made the topic: <a target=_blank class=ftalternatingbarlinklarge href="http://forums.cysticfibrosis.com/messageview.cfm?catid=5&threadid=4953">http://forums.cysticfibrosis.c...?catid=5&threadid=4953</a> about a year ago and I've always identified best with Allie while browsing the forums. She probably doesn't even remember me but I'm sad to see her go and hope she returns. I hope if she decides to leave permanently it isn't because she feels unwanted here.

 

[Scarlett81]

I have to agree with Melissa and Lindsey. I suspect that her leaving was more than what was said that day-I think maybe that particular conversation was a final straw for her, or in other words a reason for her to take a break. She's a big girl, and if she wants to take a break I think that is her decision. She has never been a person to back down if someone says something she disagrees with. I think somewhere in her wanted to go. That DOES NOT mean that I wanted her to go! I'd love for her to come back, she was a valuable member of this community.

I can't speak for anyone else but myself, and there was once instance I remember that kind of reminds me of what happened with her a few days ago here-There was a time on this site when I was trying to decide if I should proceed with getting pregnant, or try to adopt instead. I got varied advice and opinions from all. Obiovusly, we made our decision and I am pregnant now. Later I found out that Allie was under the impression that I was anti-adoption. I don't want anyone to think she was mean to me, she wasn't. She just drifted from me, and we talked less. Then when I confronted her about that, she said she the above to me. Well, that couldn't be further from the truth-I was adopted, I love the idea of adoption. I just didn't chose that for my family right now. But the point I'm trying to make is-why did she assume that? B/c she is sensitive. And the other point is, I had through that whole time expressed admiration for her, for her as a mother, as a wife, ect. I always pmd her, trying to console or encourage her. Never ONCE did I say anything negative about her adoption of Ahava or adoption period. In the end we talked things out and were fine. I have great admiration for her, and I always have. I consider her a huge part of this site. But there was a time that she seriously misjudged me-esp when I had never shown her anything but kindness and admiration. I just didn't get it. And this Santa debate-God Allie, I'm so sorry to say this-but it reminds me of that.

So to answer your question, jjflash, yes I have expressed my pride and admiration for her-alot of people here have. But I can't pass judgement on anyone here that is being accused of driving her away. I don't really believe it. I'm sorry if that hurts anyone, I dont' mean it to, honestly. I mean look at Terri-all this controversy around her. I have never known Terri to be anything other than a kind, gentle person. Let her record speak for itself.

This doesn't take away from anything that Allie has been through-she has been to hell and back. She has suffered, she is still suffering and has gone through a pain that you just can't ever really recover from. I really want her to find some peace. She'll never forget Ry or what happened, never. But she can find peace and happiness still in life. I really wish that for her. But she has to find it-no one can give it to her. And people mean well-but they won't always say the "right" thing. Or be thinking-I'm talking to a widow here, I better gentle-up my words. Esp because Allie seems so strong sometimes. But I don't think anyone has been malicious. But again-I was not a member of the discussion the other day so I don't know.

Regardless of all this-Allie, you are missed. You are valuable, I have told you a dozen times how proud I am of you, how in my eyes you are a survivor. And that all still stands. If you want to, come back-but only if you really want to. Whatever you do-I hope you get that peace that you so deserve.

 

[Scarlett81]

I have to agree with Melissa and Lindsey. I suspect that her leaving was more than what was said that day-I think maybe that particular conversation was a final straw for her, or in other words a reason for her to take a break. She's a big girl, and if she wants to take a break I think that is her decision. She has never been a person to back down if someone says something she disagrees with. I think somewhere in her wanted to go. That DOES NOT mean that I wanted her to go! I'd love for her to come back, she was a valuable member of this community.

I can't speak for anyone else but myself, and there was once instance I remember that kind of reminds me of what happened with her a few days ago here-There was a time on this site when I was trying to decide if I should proceed with getting pregnant, or try to adopt instead. I got varied advice and opinions from all. Obiovusly, we made our decision and I am pregnant now. Later I found out that Allie was under the impression that I was anti-adoption. I don't want anyone to think she was mean to me, she wasn't. She just drifted from me, and we talked less. Then when I confronted her about that, she said she the above to me. Well, that couldn't be further from the truth-I was adopted, I love the idea of adoption. I just didn't chose that for my family right now. But the point I'm trying to make is-why did she assume that? B/c she is sensitive. And the other point is, I had through that whole time expressed admiration for her, for her as a mother, as a wife, ect. I always pmd her, trying to console or encourage her. Never ONCE did I say anything negative about her adoption of Ahava or adoption period. In the end we talked things out and were fine. I have great admiration for her, and I always have. I consider her a huge part of this site. But there was a time that she seriously misjudged me-esp when I had never shown her anything but kindness and admiration. I just didn't get it. And this Santa debate-God Allie, I'm so sorry to say this-but it reminds me of that.

So to answer your question, jjflash, yes I have expressed my pride and admiration for her-alot of people here have. But I can't pass judgement on anyone here that is being accused of driving her away. I don't really believe it. I'm sorry if that hurts anyone, I dont' mean it to, honestly. I mean look at Terri-all this controversy around her. I have never known Terri to be anything other than a kind, gentle person. Let her record speak for itself.

This doesn't take away from anything that Allie has been through-she has been to hell and back. She has suffered, she is still suffering and has gone through a pain that you just can't ever really recover from. I really want her to find some peace. She'll never forget Ry or what happened, never. But she can find peace and happiness still in life. I really wish that for her. But she has to find it-no one can give it to her. And people mean well-but they won't always say the "right" thing. Or be thinking-I'm talking to a widow here, I better gentle-up my words. Esp because Allie seems so strong sometimes. But I don't think anyone has been malicious. But again-I was not a member of the discussion the other day so I don't know.

Regardless of all this-Allie, you are missed. You are valuable, I have told you a dozen times how proud I am of you, how in my eyes you are a survivor. And that all still stands. If you want to, come back-but only if you really want to. Whatever you do-I hope you get that peace that you so deserve.