Having a hard time...

kdmr1220

New member
I WAS THE LAST OF 7 CHILDREN. I HAD A BROTHER 6 YEARS OLDER THAN I WAS WITH CF. THE OTHER SYBLINGS ARE CARRIERS. WHEN I WAS BORN THE DOCTERS TOLD MY PARENTS THEY SHOULD GIVE ME UP FOR ADOPTION. HAPPY TO SAY THEY DIDNT. THEY SUCKED IT UP AND GAVE ALL OF US THE LOVE AND CAREING WE ALL NEEDED. I HAVE TWO CHILDREN AND CAN SEE BOTH SIDES OF THIS DILEMA. A PARENT WILL GIVE UP EVERYTHING FOR THERE CHILDREN AND WONT GIVE THEM UP FOR ANYTHING. MY FATHER COULDNT STAND TO SEE ME IN THE HOSPITAL. HE BLAMED HIMSELF FOR MY SITUATION BUT NEVER SAID ANYTHING. I HOPE YOU CAN SIT DOWN WITH YOUR PARENTS AND WORK THIS OUT CAUSE YOU AND YOUR PARENTS ARE WORTH TO MUCH TO WAIST. A PARENT AND CHILD LOVE AND RELATIONSHIP IS THE MOST IMPORTANT THING IN THE WORLD. I HAVE LOST MY PARENTS AND MISS THEM MORE THAN ANYTHING. IF MY PARENTS WOULD HAVE DIED AND THEY THOUGHT I BLAMED THEM OR WERE THOUGHT I WAS MAD AT THEM IT WOULD EAT ME UP THE REST OF MY LIFE. SIT BACK AND THINK ABOUT HOW LONG YOU WANT TO BE UPSET WITH YOUR PARENTS. YOU CANT FIX IT AFTER THEY OR YOU PASS AWAY.
 

kdmr1220

New member
I WAS THE LAST OF 7 CHILDREN. I HAD A BROTHER 6 YEARS OLDER THAN I WAS WITH CF. THE OTHER SYBLINGS ARE CARRIERS. WHEN I WAS BORN THE DOCTERS TOLD MY PARENTS THEY SHOULD GIVE ME UP FOR ADOPTION. HAPPY TO SAY THEY DIDNT. THEY SUCKED IT UP AND GAVE ALL OF US THE LOVE AND CAREING WE ALL NEEDED. I HAVE TWO CHILDREN AND CAN SEE BOTH SIDES OF THIS DILEMA. A PARENT WILL GIVE UP EVERYTHING FOR THERE CHILDREN AND WONT GIVE THEM UP FOR ANYTHING. MY FATHER COULDNT STAND TO SEE ME IN THE HOSPITAL. HE BLAMED HIMSELF FOR MY SITUATION BUT NEVER SAID ANYTHING. I HOPE YOU CAN SIT DOWN WITH YOUR PARENTS AND WORK THIS OUT CAUSE YOU AND YOUR PARENTS ARE WORTH TO MUCH TO WAIST. A PARENT AND CHILD LOVE AND RELATIONSHIP IS THE MOST IMPORTANT THING IN THE WORLD. I HAVE LOST MY PARENTS AND MISS THEM MORE THAN ANYTHING. IF MY PARENTS WOULD HAVE DIED AND THEY THOUGHT I BLAMED THEM OR WERE THOUGHT I WAS MAD AT THEM IT WOULD EAT ME UP THE REST OF MY LIFE. SIT BACK AND THINK ABOUT HOW LONG YOU WANT TO BE UPSET WITH YOUR PARENTS. YOU CANT FIX IT AFTER THEY OR YOU PASS AWAY.
 

kdmr1220

New member
I WAS THE LAST OF 7 CHILDREN. I HAD A BROTHER 6 YEARS OLDER THAN I WAS WITH CF. THE OTHER SYBLINGS ARE CARRIERS. WHEN I WAS BORN THE DOCTERS TOLD MY PARENTS THEY SHOULD GIVE ME UP FOR ADOPTION. HAPPY TO SAY THEY DIDNT. THEY SUCKED IT UP AND GAVE ALL OF US THE LOVE AND CAREING WE ALL NEEDED. I HAVE TWO CHILDREN AND CAN SEE BOTH SIDES OF THIS DILEMA. A PARENT WILL GIVE UP EVERYTHING FOR THERE CHILDREN AND WONT GIVE THEM UP FOR ANYTHING. MY FATHER COULDNT STAND TO SEE ME IN THE HOSPITAL. HE BLAMED HIMSELF FOR MY SITUATION BUT NEVER SAID ANYTHING. I HOPE YOU CAN SIT DOWN WITH YOUR PARENTS AND WORK THIS OUT CAUSE YOU AND YOUR PARENTS ARE WORTH TO MUCH TO WAIST. A PARENT AND CHILD LOVE AND RELATIONSHIP IS THE MOST IMPORTANT THING IN THE WORLD. I HAVE LOST MY PARENTS AND MISS THEM MORE THAN ANYTHING. IF MY PARENTS WOULD HAVE DIED AND THEY THOUGHT I BLAMED THEM OR WERE THOUGHT I WAS MAD AT THEM IT WOULD EAT ME UP THE REST OF MY LIFE. SIT BACK AND THINK ABOUT HOW LONG YOU WANT TO BE UPSET WITH YOUR PARENTS. YOU CANT FIX IT AFTER THEY OR YOU PASS AWAY.
 

kdmr1220

New member
I WAS THE LAST OF 7 CHILDREN. I HAD A BROTHER 6 YEARS OLDER THAN I WAS WITH CF. THE OTHER SYBLINGS ARE CARRIERS. WHEN I WAS BORN THE DOCTERS TOLD MY PARENTS THEY SHOULD GIVE ME UP FOR ADOPTION. HAPPY TO SAY THEY DIDNT. THEY SUCKED IT UP AND GAVE ALL OF US THE LOVE AND CAREING WE ALL NEEDED. I HAVE TWO CHILDREN AND CAN SEE BOTH SIDES OF THIS DILEMA. A PARENT WILL GIVE UP EVERYTHING FOR THERE CHILDREN AND WONT GIVE THEM UP FOR ANYTHING. MY FATHER COULDNT STAND TO SEE ME IN THE HOSPITAL. HE BLAMED HIMSELF FOR MY SITUATION BUT NEVER SAID ANYTHING. I HOPE YOU CAN SIT DOWN WITH YOUR PARENTS AND WORK THIS OUT CAUSE YOU AND YOUR PARENTS ARE WORTH TO MUCH TO WAIST. A PARENT AND CHILD LOVE AND RELATIONSHIP IS THE MOST IMPORTANT THING IN THE WORLD. I HAVE LOST MY PARENTS AND MISS THEM MORE THAN ANYTHING. IF MY PARENTS WOULD HAVE DIED AND THEY THOUGHT I BLAMED THEM OR WERE THOUGHT I WAS MAD AT THEM IT WOULD EAT ME UP THE REST OF MY LIFE. SIT BACK AND THINK ABOUT HOW LONG YOU WANT TO BE UPSET WITH YOUR PARENTS. YOU CANT FIX IT AFTER THEY OR YOU PASS AWAY.
 

kdmr1220

New member
I WAS THE LAST OF 7 CHILDREN. I HAD A BROTHER 6 YEARS OLDER THAN I WAS WITH CF. THE OTHER SYBLINGS ARE CARRIERS. WHEN I WAS BORN THE DOCTERS TOLD MY PARENTS THEY SHOULD GIVE ME UP FOR ADOPTION. HAPPY TO SAY THEY DIDNT. THEY SUCKED IT UP AND GAVE ALL OF US THE LOVE AND CAREING WE ALL NEEDED. I HAVE TWO CHILDREN AND CAN SEE BOTH SIDES OF THIS DILEMA. A PARENT WILL GIVE UP EVERYTHING FOR THERE CHILDREN AND WONT GIVE THEM UP FOR ANYTHING. MY FATHER COULDNT STAND TO SEE ME IN THE HOSPITAL. HE BLAMED HIMSELF FOR MY SITUATION BUT NEVER SAID ANYTHING. I HOPE YOU CAN SIT DOWN WITH YOUR PARENTS AND WORK THIS OUT CAUSE YOU AND YOUR PARENTS ARE WORTH TO MUCH TO WAIST. A PARENT AND CHILD LOVE AND RELATIONSHIP IS THE MOST IMPORTANT THING IN THE WORLD. I HAVE LOST MY PARENTS AND MISS THEM MORE THAN ANYTHING. IF MY PARENTS WOULD HAVE DIED AND THEY THOUGHT I BLAMED THEM OR WERE THOUGHT I WAS MAD AT THEM IT WOULD EAT ME UP THE REST OF MY LIFE. SIT BACK AND THINK ABOUT HOW LONG YOU WANT TO BE UPSET WITH YOUR PARENTS. YOU CANT FIX IT AFTER THEY OR YOU PASS AWAY.
 

lilywing

New member
Hi all,
When I read this post, I expected to find support for Jen on the forum. Instead, I feel some responses were quite harsh on her, particularly from some of the parents.

I believe I have two of the most over-protective, yet completely caring, compassionate, loving parents I could hope for. I consider myself lucky. I know this is not a reality for everyone with cystic fibrosis.

Just because you have a chronic, life-threatening disease resulting from the combination of your parents genes does not entitle you to more love, understanding, or great parenting, unfortunately. You might still have to struggle with a deadbeat dad, a cold-hearted mom, or parents who can't/don't want to be involved in your life.

Jen, I absolutely understand the anger you must have with feeling that you can't talk to your parents, and that they might have the nerve/ignorance to tell you to suck it up. I know I would be a different person without the support and all-consuming love of my parents; I would be bitter without it. I pray that you do have the support you need from your fiance and other people in your life. I hope that, one day, things will be better with your parents.

And Parents, know that your love is so critical. Through the years, there may be feelings of guilt, sorrow, resentment, anger, etc. I don't think you can say your child is "wrong" for how they feel. There are times when the struggle is on, and it's easy to be negative. God knows that's where I'm at right now. But hopefully, there will be more times of hope and clarity and peace.

Kelly
 

lilywing

New member
Hi all,
When I read this post, I expected to find support for Jen on the forum. Instead, I feel some responses were quite harsh on her, particularly from some of the parents.

I believe I have two of the most over-protective, yet completely caring, compassionate, loving parents I could hope for. I consider myself lucky. I know this is not a reality for everyone with cystic fibrosis.

Just because you have a chronic, life-threatening disease resulting from the combination of your parents genes does not entitle you to more love, understanding, or great parenting, unfortunately. You might still have to struggle with a deadbeat dad, a cold-hearted mom, or parents who can't/don't want to be involved in your life.

Jen, I absolutely understand the anger you must have with feeling that you can't talk to your parents, and that they might have the nerve/ignorance to tell you to suck it up. I know I would be a different person without the support and all-consuming love of my parents; I would be bitter without it. I pray that you do have the support you need from your fiance and other people in your life. I hope that, one day, things will be better with your parents.

And Parents, know that your love is so critical. Through the years, there may be feelings of guilt, sorrow, resentment, anger, etc. I don't think you can say your child is "wrong" for how they feel. There are times when the struggle is on, and it's easy to be negative. God knows that's where I'm at right now. But hopefully, there will be more times of hope and clarity and peace.

Kelly
 

lilywing

New member
Hi all,
When I read this post, I expected to find support for Jen on the forum. Instead, I feel some responses were quite harsh on her, particularly from some of the parents.

I believe I have two of the most over-protective, yet completely caring, compassionate, loving parents I could hope for. I consider myself lucky. I know this is not a reality for everyone with cystic fibrosis.

Just because you have a chronic, life-threatening disease resulting from the combination of your parents genes does not entitle you to more love, understanding, or great parenting, unfortunately. You might still have to struggle with a deadbeat dad, a cold-hearted mom, or parents who can't/don't want to be involved in your life.

Jen, I absolutely understand the anger you must have with feeling that you can't talk to your parents, and that they might have the nerve/ignorance to tell you to suck it up. I know I would be a different person without the support and all-consuming love of my parents; I would be bitter without it. I pray that you do have the support you need from your fiance and other people in your life. I hope that, one day, things will be better with your parents.

And Parents, know that your love is so critical. Through the years, there may be feelings of guilt, sorrow, resentment, anger, etc. I don't think you can say your child is "wrong" for how they feel. There are times when the struggle is on, and it's easy to be negative. God knows that's where I'm at right now. But hopefully, there will be more times of hope and clarity and peace.

Kelly
 

lilywing

New member
Hi all,
When I read this post, I expected to find support for Jen on the forum. Instead, I feel some responses were quite harsh on her, particularly from some of the parents.

I believe I have two of the most over-protective, yet completely caring, compassionate, loving parents I could hope for. I consider myself lucky. I know this is not a reality for everyone with cystic fibrosis.

Just because you have a chronic, life-threatening disease resulting from the combination of your parents genes does not entitle you to more love, understanding, or great parenting, unfortunately. You might still have to struggle with a deadbeat dad, a cold-hearted mom, or parents who can't/don't want to be involved in your life.

Jen, I absolutely understand the anger you must have with feeling that you can't talk to your parents, and that they might have the nerve/ignorance to tell you to suck it up. I know I would be a different person without the support and all-consuming love of my parents; I would be bitter without it. I pray that you do have the support you need from your fiance and other people in your life. I hope that, one day, things will be better with your parents.

And Parents, know that your love is so critical. Through the years, there may be feelings of guilt, sorrow, resentment, anger, etc. I don't think you can say your child is "wrong" for how they feel. There are times when the struggle is on, and it's easy to be negative. God knows that's where I'm at right now. But hopefully, there will be more times of hope and clarity and peace.

Kelly
 

lilywing

New member
Hi all,
<br />When I read this post, I expected to find support for Jen on the forum. Instead, I feel some responses were quite harsh on her, particularly from some of the parents.
<br />
<br />I believe I have two of the most over-protective, yet completely caring, compassionate, loving parents I could hope for. I consider myself lucky. I know this is not a reality for everyone with cystic fibrosis.
<br />
<br />Just because you have a chronic, life-threatening disease resulting from the combination of your parents genes does not entitle you to more love, understanding, or great parenting, unfortunately. You might still have to struggle with a deadbeat dad, a cold-hearted mom, or parents who can't/don't want to be involved in your life.
<br />
<br />Jen, I absolutely understand the anger you must have with feeling that you can't talk to your parents, and that they might have the nerve/ignorance to tell you to suck it up. I know I would be a different person without the support and all-consuming love of my parents; I would be bitter without it. I pray that you do have the support you need from your fiance and other people in your life. I hope that, one day, things will be better with your parents.
<br />
<br />And Parents, know that your love is so critical. Through the years, there may be feelings of guilt, sorrow, resentment, anger, etc. I don't think you can say your child is "wrong" for how they feel. There are times when the struggle is on, and it's easy to be negative. God knows that's where I'm at right now. But hopefully, there will be more times of hope and clarity and peace.
<br />
<br />Kelly
 

JazzysMom

New member
To Kelly...

I think many of us were questioning whether they knew or not as to their carrier status. That is a significant piece of info that could justify automatic resentment. No doubt that they way her Dad handle things is inappropriate, but ignornace lies everywhere regarding CF even to the closest of us.

Not everyone is fortunate to have supportive parents....you are correct.

Jenn hasnt come back to answer the ?? we asked so I am sure she feels the same way you do regarding the responses. She did ask if anyone else felt this way......
 

JazzysMom

New member
To Kelly...

I think many of us were questioning whether they knew or not as to their carrier status. That is a significant piece of info that could justify automatic resentment. No doubt that they way her Dad handle things is inappropriate, but ignornace lies everywhere regarding CF even to the closest of us.

Not everyone is fortunate to have supportive parents....you are correct.

Jenn hasnt come back to answer the ?? we asked so I am sure she feels the same way you do regarding the responses. She did ask if anyone else felt this way......
 

JazzysMom

New member
To Kelly...

I think many of us were questioning whether they knew or not as to their carrier status. That is a significant piece of info that could justify automatic resentment. No doubt that they way her Dad handle things is inappropriate, but ignornace lies everywhere regarding CF even to the closest of us.

Not everyone is fortunate to have supportive parents....you are correct.

Jenn hasnt come back to answer the ?? we asked so I am sure she feels the same way you do regarding the responses. She did ask if anyone else felt this way......
 

JazzysMom

New member
To Kelly...

I think many of us were questioning whether they knew or not as to their carrier status. That is a significant piece of info that could justify automatic resentment. No doubt that they way her Dad handle things is inappropriate, but ignornace lies everywhere regarding CF even to the closest of us.

Not everyone is fortunate to have supportive parents....you are correct.

Jenn hasnt come back to answer the ?? we asked so I am sure she feels the same way you do regarding the responses. She did ask if anyone else felt this way......
 

JazzysMom

New member
To Kelly...
<br />
<br />I think many of us were questioning whether they knew or not as to their carrier status. That is a significant piece of info that could justify automatic resentment. No doubt that they way her Dad handle things is inappropriate, but ignornace lies everywhere regarding CF even to the closest of us.
<br />
<br />Not everyone is fortunate to have supportive parents....you are correct.
<br />
<br />Jenn hasnt come back to answer the ?? we asked so I am sure she feels the same way you do regarding the responses. She did ask if anyone else felt this way......
<br />
<br />
<br />
 

JenDiS

New member
I've been avoiding responding back because I knew if I did I would tell those of you who think im wrong for feelin this way to, here let me sugar coat it, GET REAL. Lets be realistic here. Im not sure if my parents got tested or not they didnt tell me but my mom had someone on her side with it and as for my dads side I dont know who had it. Whether or not you knew, PARENTS, your child most likely will one day feel how I feel right now. Whether it be for two seconds and they dont tell you how they feel or they do voice their opinion and keep the resentment with them for years ITS GOING TO HAPPEN whether you took the chance or not. My advice for you, is to learn how to deal with that when it comes. Take my post as a look into the future.

Let me give u a little bit as to how my dad is. When I was put on o2 for some breathing help before going in the hospital the next day, he told me that if I ever had to stay on o2 I might as well give up because thats it. Hes gotten upset with me for being sick. Ive brought this situation up with my parents before and they laughed at me so for those that think its easy to just "sit down and talk with them" im sorry I dont have the great family that sits down when theres an issue and talks about it. Instead we fight, so this is where I come for comfort. Sadly the ONE THING I did ask which was "did anyone else feel this way and if so any advice as to how to deal with it?" Meaning THOSE WITH CF, was never answered. Maybe I shoulda been more clear about that because I guess those that think having family members with it or being a parent with a CF child means that you know what im feeling and you dont. You never will and you never will know how your child feels.

I apolgize if this post "offended or upset" anyone. But seriously get real.
 

JenDiS

New member
I've been avoiding responding back because I knew if I did I would tell those of you who think im wrong for feelin this way to, here let me sugar coat it, GET REAL. Lets be realistic here. Im not sure if my parents got tested or not they didnt tell me but my mom had someone on her side with it and as for my dads side I dont know who had it. Whether or not you knew, PARENTS, your child most likely will one day feel how I feel right now. Whether it be for two seconds and they dont tell you how they feel or they do voice their opinion and keep the resentment with them for years ITS GOING TO HAPPEN whether you took the chance or not. My advice for you, is to learn how to deal with that when it comes. Take my post as a look into the future.

Let me give u a little bit as to how my dad is. When I was put on o2 for some breathing help before going in the hospital the next day, he told me that if I ever had to stay on o2 I might as well give up because thats it. Hes gotten upset with me for being sick. Ive brought this situation up with my parents before and they laughed at me so for those that think its easy to just "sit down and talk with them" im sorry I dont have the great family that sits down when theres an issue and talks about it. Instead we fight, so this is where I come for comfort. Sadly the ONE THING I did ask which was "did anyone else feel this way and if so any advice as to how to deal with it?" Meaning THOSE WITH CF, was never answered. Maybe I shoulda been more clear about that because I guess those that think having family members with it or being a parent with a CF child means that you know what im feeling and you dont. You never will and you never will know how your child feels.

I apolgize if this post "offended or upset" anyone. But seriously get real.
 

JenDiS

New member
I've been avoiding responding back because I knew if I did I would tell those of you who think im wrong for feelin this way to, here let me sugar coat it, GET REAL. Lets be realistic here. Im not sure if my parents got tested or not they didnt tell me but my mom had someone on her side with it and as for my dads side I dont know who had it. Whether or not you knew, PARENTS, your child most likely will one day feel how I feel right now. Whether it be for two seconds and they dont tell you how they feel or they do voice their opinion and keep the resentment with them for years ITS GOING TO HAPPEN whether you took the chance or not. My advice for you, is to learn how to deal with that when it comes. Take my post as a look into the future.

Let me give u a little bit as to how my dad is. When I was put on o2 for some breathing help before going in the hospital the next day, he told me that if I ever had to stay on o2 I might as well give up because thats it. Hes gotten upset with me for being sick. Ive brought this situation up with my parents before and they laughed at me so for those that think its easy to just "sit down and talk with them" im sorry I dont have the great family that sits down when theres an issue and talks about it. Instead we fight, so this is where I come for comfort. Sadly the ONE THING I did ask which was "did anyone else feel this way and if so any advice as to how to deal with it?" Meaning THOSE WITH CF, was never answered. Maybe I shoulda been more clear about that because I guess those that think having family members with it or being a parent with a CF child means that you know what im feeling and you dont. You never will and you never will know how your child feels.

I apolgize if this post "offended or upset" anyone. But seriously get real.
 

JenDiS

New member
I've been avoiding responding back because I knew if I did I would tell those of you who think im wrong for feelin this way to, here let me sugar coat it, GET REAL. Lets be realistic here. Im not sure if my parents got tested or not they didnt tell me but my mom had someone on her side with it and as for my dads side I dont know who had it. Whether or not you knew, PARENTS, your child most likely will one day feel how I feel right now. Whether it be for two seconds and they dont tell you how they feel or they do voice their opinion and keep the resentment with them for years ITS GOING TO HAPPEN whether you took the chance or not. My advice for you, is to learn how to deal with that when it comes. Take my post as a look into the future.

Let me give u a little bit as to how my dad is. When I was put on o2 for some breathing help before going in the hospital the next day, he told me that if I ever had to stay on o2 I might as well give up because thats it. Hes gotten upset with me for being sick. Ive brought this situation up with my parents before and they laughed at me so for those that think its easy to just "sit down and talk with them" im sorry I dont have the great family that sits down when theres an issue and talks about it. Instead we fight, so this is where I come for comfort. Sadly the ONE THING I did ask which was "did anyone else feel this way and if so any advice as to how to deal with it?" Meaning THOSE WITH CF, was never answered. Maybe I shoulda been more clear about that because I guess those that think having family members with it or being a parent with a CF child means that you know what im feeling and you dont. You never will and you never will know how your child feels.

I apolgize if this post "offended or upset" anyone. But seriously get real.
 

JenDiS

New member
I've been avoiding responding back because I knew if I did I would tell those of you who think im wrong for feelin this way to, here let me sugar coat it, GET REAL. Lets be realistic here. Im not sure if my parents got tested or not they didnt tell me but my mom had someone on her side with it and as for my dads side I dont know who had it. Whether or not you knew, PARENTS, your child most likely will one day feel how I feel right now. Whether it be for two seconds and they dont tell you how they feel or they do voice their opinion and keep the resentment with them for years ITS GOING TO HAPPEN whether you took the chance or not. My advice for you, is to learn how to deal with that when it comes. Take my post as a look into the future.
<br />
<br />Let me give u a little bit as to how my dad is. When I was put on o2 for some breathing help before going in the hospital the next day, he told me that if I ever had to stay on o2 I might as well give up because thats it. Hes gotten upset with me for being sick. Ive brought this situation up with my parents before and they laughed at me so for those that think its easy to just "sit down and talk with them" im sorry I dont have the great family that sits down when theres an issue and talks about it. Instead we fight, so this is where I come for comfort. Sadly the ONE THING I did ask which was "did anyone else feel this way and if so any advice as to how to deal with it?" Meaning THOSE WITH CF, was never answered. Maybe I shoulda been more clear about that because I guess those that think having family members with it or being a parent with a CF child means that you know what im feeling and you dont. You never will and you never will know how your child feels.
<br />
<br />I apolgize if this post "offended or upset" anyone. But seriously get real.
 
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